Fourth and Inches

by Kata Čuić

  She doesn’t resist when I fuse our mouths together, seeking out her taste, the soft feel of her tongue tangling with mine.

  “Tell me I can be in your bed again,” I mumble against her lips.

  I might have every intention of not letting up when she begs for mercy in just a few minutes, but there are still some things I need to hear.

  “I wasn’t the one keeping you out of it all week,” she pants as I lower her to her feet only to pull her shirt over her head. “You did that to yourself.”

  And I still have no regrets about the way I spent my time.

  I don’t want to have any more regrets.

  Life is too short to live that way.

  With a few tugs of the maddening contraption that is a bra, her breasts spring free and it’s all I can do not to squeeze too hard.

  God, she feels good in my hands.

  But, my hands aren’t enough. I’m going to lick every inch of this woman before dawn.

  I trace over each groove on her breasts with my tongue, wishing I could make her understand how fucking mesmerizing she is. Every time I touch her scars, from the very first moment she let me see them, she flinches.

  It’s understandable she feels disfigured and unworthy. My words aren’t enough to sway her.

  I have never once lied when I told her these marks don’t matter to me.

  Without these scars, she isn’t my wife.

  I’ve seen more naked breasts thrust in my face in the past few years than any man can dream of seeing in a lifetime. None of them have tempted me the way Evie’s do.

  Her head lolls back on a sigh and she threads her fingers through my hair.

  My dick jumps for joy.

  “God,” she breathes. “What has gotten into you?”

  I straighten, then lower her onto the bed before tugging off her worn sweatpants and panties in one go.

  She seems dazed, almost spell-bound. Not an ounce of resistance is thrown my way.

  My heart pounds faster, knowing I’m the one who did this to her.

  “It’s funny you mention it, because I was kind of hoping I’d be the one getting into you.”

  She throws her head back and laughs, and it’s the most beautiful sound in my world.

  Better than any stadium, full of screaming fans.

  More addictive than the catchiest song.

  My clothes aren’t what I want to feel against my body, so I rip them off. In the next breath, I’m on top of her, skin to skin, where I belong.

  The news I received today was a wake-up call. Our eight-month deal might be rendered meaningless, so I’m going to spend every second I have enjoying this woman.

  Appreciating her.

  Worshipping her.

  Loving her.

  I might not be able to protect her.

  With a calloused fingertip far too rough to be given free rein to touch such soft skin, I map over the contours of her face, committing every last detail to memory.

  In case memories will have to sustain me for a lifetime.

  “Rob?” Her eyes are unsure, all the doubt returning in a swirling blue that takes my breath away.

  I can’t imagine my life without these eyes.

  To hell with writing it down. Some things need to be said in the moment, only preserved for posterity in our memories.

  “I’m still afraid to hurt you. Afraid that if it happens too many times, you’ll leave me again. But, I want in you so badly, it hurts.”

  A hint of a smile pulls up her kiss-swollen lips. “And what is it you don’t want?”

  “There’s nothing I don’t want with you. I want you to let me do whatever I want tonight.”

  She scrunches her nose in that fucking adorably familiar way. “That’s two wants and zero don’t wants. That’s not part of the deal.”

  “Fine.” I start with her neck. Fuck, who am I kidding? I can’t live without this. “I’m going to love you until the sun comes up any way I want to. And, I don’t want you to tell me no.”

  She rolls her head to the side, the sunlight streaming through the windows casting a golden hue to her tan skin. “The sun is still out. It’s only around six.”

  “Lucky me.”

  All I want is more time.

  I kiss my way down her prone body, reveling in the trust she confers on me to do as I will.

  Balancing my need for satisfaction versus wanting to make this last will be a real struggle. I stop and inhale against her thigh, the sweet scent of her arousal the most powerful force I’ve ever reckoned with.

  I’ve always heard smell holds far more memories than any other sense. Not sight, not sound, not taste, not touch.

  Instantly, I’m transported back to all the times she’s given herself over to me, believing I’d never hurt her, always do right by her.

  I’m going to do so right in the time I have left.

  The first taste of her explodes on my tongue, sending me into a frenzy over a year in the making.

  I can’t get enough.

  I’ll never be satiated.

  “Rob,” she moans, her legs spread wide for me, letting me into the most secret part of herself.

  A primal drumbeat pounds in my brain, in sync with my heart.

  Mine. Mine. Mine.

  To love.

  To honor.

  To cherish.

  Until death do us part.

  She tightens her thighs around my head, her orgasm building quicker than I expected. Soon, the scraping of her nails against my scalp move in time with my tongue.

  Music only we can make together.

  I feel the rush of her breath all the way through my body to my toes. The whisper of my name on her lips as she finds her release electrifies me.

  I can’t help but drink up everything she offers so freely.

  “Rob,” she pants, tugging sharply on my hair. “I’m done. Please…too sensitive.”

  A pecking doubt erodes my euphoria.

  She’s never come so fast before.

  “Did he…did he do this for you?”

  Was he better than me? Did he teach you to enjoy it in ways I never did?

  She raises onto her elbows, gazing down at me with a raised eyebrow. The disbelieving expression seems so out of place on her flushed face.

  I remember that look.

  The crazy hair, the pink cheeks, the heaving breasts.

  Did he make her look this way, too?

  Like a goddess who shouldn’t be walking the earth with us mere mortals?

  She blinks at me a few times before finding her voice. “I didn’t want him to.”

  “You didn’t?”

  “No.” She shakes her head and bites her puffy lip. “That’s…different. More intimate than sex. I just didn’t know it before.”

  I bury my face between her legs again to hide the triumphant smile that has very little right to be on my face.

  “Mmm,” she moans. “It’s your turn.”

  I come up for air only long enough to make her understand. “I’ll have a turn when I’m ready. I’m not nearly done with you yet.”

  Not even close.

  This time, it’s all about savoring, torturing her in the sweetest ways until she’ll never consider looking elsewhere for satisfaction. With every stroke of my tongue against her sweet center, I prove her pleasure is mine.

  She tries to tug me away again after round two, but I’m not ready.

  Not ready to part with my favorite flavor.

  It’s almost comical the way she gives up and resigns herself to her fate, her body flopping back down on the mattress until I’ve had my fill.

  I only come up for air after she reaches her third orgasm because my damn jaw gives out before my brain is ready to call it quits.

  Call me a glutton.

  When it comes to Evie, there’s no disputing that fact.

  Sunset casts the bedroom in a fiery hue as I make my way up her spent, absolutely relaxed body.

  My hands that once looked too big to be
trusted not to cause harm now look perfectly placed on her flat stomach, which is still heaving from the last time she came.

  “Hello, babies.” I kiss over her hot skin, praying for some kind of miracle. In so many ways.

  “Rob…” She’s obviously not relaxed enough.

  “I’m allowed to do whatever I want, remember?”

  “I’m not trying to stop you,” she sighs, still running her fingers through my hair. “Letting you build yourself up for disappointment was never part of the bargain, though.”

  “Life is full of disappointment, baby. If it wasn’t, there would be no need for hope.”

  All I have to go on is hope.

  Her answering sigh is more of an acquiescence than anything else.

  “Daddy missed you,” I whisper. “But, we’re together now. We’re home.”

  “I thought you wanted to move out of this condo?”

  I climb the rest of my way up until I’m face to face with the most beautiful woman in the world. “Home isn’t a place. It’s a person. You’re my home.”

  Understanding dawns in her eyes. The kind I’ve been fighting for.

  She reaches up her hand to cup my cheek. “I think you’ve always been mine.”

  “Then let me come home.” I brush a kiss across her soft lips. “Not just for tonight. Not for eight months. Forever.”

  A frown crinkles her forehead. “Forever is an awfully long time. I can’t take you for very long, and you have team training to get back to tomorrow.”

  “Smartass.”

  I tickle her until she’s gasping for air, slowly moving us up the bed as she writhes and squeals.

  By the time her head is resting on a pillow at the top of the bed, she looks around with amusement dancing in her blue eyes. “Oh, very slick, Mr. Falls. Nicely done.”

  “Nah. I did some of my best work earlier, Mrs. Falls. You were quite slick.”

  She laughs until I cut her off with a kiss.

  The first push into her tight heat nearly does me in.

  Thank God she needs me to be fast.

  I’m not going to last long, anyway.

  With the woman I love beneath me, all around me, I have zero doubt.

  It’s never felt like this.

  Never been so good as it is with her.

  Even if it can’t last forever.

  Her breasts brush against my chest every time I thrust. Every moan, every breath spurs me on.

  Harder, faster, letting go of everything outside of this moment.

  That same caveman instinct rolls through me as I drive into this woman who’s my everything. Her body belongs to me; those eggs are mine; and I’m done holding back.

  Every pump has me gasping for breath, seeing stars, on the verge of coming my brains out.

  She’s so soft, so tiny beneath me. And her sweet pussy…

  Christ, she’s so tight and hot.

  I’m close to exploding when the first whimper penetrates through my haze of absolute pleasure.

  “Hold onto me, baby,” I gasp, still not ready for this to end. “Hold on and don’t let go.”

  She wraps her strong arms around my shoulders, squeezing every time I thrust into her. “Promise you won’t stop.”

  “I won’t stop.” I kiss her forehead, her cheeks, seek out her tongue to drown out the moans which aren’t so pleasant.

  Instead of pulling away, I think about all the fantasies I used to have about exactly this. Owning Evie’s body because she wants me to.

  Even through her pain, she still wants me.

  She’s still clinging to me like I’m the only man in her world.

  That knowledge is all it takes for me to break.

  My abs tighten, lightning slices down my spine, and I come into her so hard I know she’ll be feeling it for days.

  And I want that.

  God, do I fucking want it.

  I don’t want to leave the warmth of her body, my home, but I pull out oh-so-slowly, giving her time to adjust to the painful intrusion of our reality.

  It takes me a few minutes to speak, but she never complains that I must surely be crushing her under my weight. “Baby? Are you okay? Was that…good enough?”

  She laughs a little through her teeth. “That was everything I’ve ever wanted. Was it good enough for you?”

  I understand the real question.

  Am I good enough for you?

  I cup her face in my hands, swiping at the swollen bruise I won’t ever stop seeing on her face. “Oh, Mrs. Falls. How can you not know by now? You’re every fantasy I’ve ever had.”

  It’s clear the tears she finally lets loose are of relief rather than pain.

  Still, it’s not until she’s cleaned up and adequately medicated that I relax in our bed, with her warm body covering me.

  Even as my hand carves a path up and down her back in the way she likes, I’m flirting with sleep.

  “Rob?” Her hoarse voice startles me out of my bliss.

  “Yeah, baby?”

  “Why did you actually punch Mackey?”

  It takes me a few moments to remember the dirtbag who owns that name. I’ve never associated him with anything other than scum, not fitting for human decency. “He asked where you were. Why he hadn’t seen you at any games, or any pictures of us together online. Said he remembered you from our college days, and he was proud of me for cutting you loose. He literally patted my back and said I was too good for a disfigured bitch, only in it for the money.”

  She flinches when I don’t hold back the truth.

  How will she react when I tell her everything she still doesn’t know?

  “So…you punched him?”

  “If James hadn’t been there to hold me back, I would’ve done much worse.”

  “Remind me to send James a fruit basket as thanks.” She kisses the tattoo on my chest of her own name, then burrows into her familiar place against my neck.

  I fall asleep, knowing my name is etched on her body, too.

  Fear: Soon, I’m going to be a zombie.

  Then, you really won’t love me.

  You’ll have to shoot me in the head

  when I try to eat your brains.

  Rob snaps his laptop shut when I thrust the notebook at him. “Number one, I don’t own a gun. Number two, if you’re hungry, I’ll feed you. Number three, you’re not taking this exercise seriously at all anymore.”

  Oh, I’m being very serious. “It’s been a month, Rob. I can’t stay cooped up in this penthouse forever. I’m losing my damn mind.”

  He gives me the stink eye, but reaches across the bed to thread our fingers together. “There were actually some very important things you were supposed to be doing with your time.”

  “Such as?”

  He rolls his eyes. “Oh, I dunno. Finding a new gynecology specialist in the area. Setting up therapy appointments like you wanted to do when you first got here. I know I’ve been busy with the team’s summer training schedule, but I’m pretty sure if you had told me you made appointments, I would have remembered that.”

  “How am I supposed to schedule anything when you don’t want me stepping foot outside?” It’s a weak argument, and we both know it. Though Rob insists I’m safe here, if I really wanted to leave, he couldn’t stop me. He wouldn’t.

  I’ve had a month to regroup. While I can’t shake the fear Jackson might be waiting on any street corner, I also have no proof he was ever really in New York.

  If he had violated his parole, surely the DA would have called to notify me.

  There’s no reason for me to hide anymore.

  I can’t live like this forever.

  “What’s this really about?” Rob’s tone softens as he squeezes my hand. “Are you maybe avoiding putting down roots here because you still don’t believe it will be permanent?”

  “It isn’t permanent. You said so yourself. Your contract with Sacramento is up at the end of next season.”

  “That’s almost seven months from now. Coincidenc
e? Or, is there a part of you planning an exit strategy after the terms of our deal have been met?”

  A sigh is my only answer.

  Rob and I have put a lot of our past behind us and taken steps toward a shared future. We’ve settled into a new routine, but the problem is…it feels just like that.

  A routine.

  Done without thought, without effort, without…trying.

  He leaves before I’m awake.

  Without any job to report to, no classes to attend, I sleep in every day.

  And why not?

  All I have to look forward to while Rob regains ground with his team is surfing the internet, unpacking the boxes he left all over the condo when he thought about moving, and foraging for food in the kitchen.

  He comes home every day around six, and we have dinner together.

  The food delivery service he orders provides me with everything I need to cook a healthy meal, in line with a professional football player’s nutritional guidelines.

  Sure, I get to enjoy the top of the line kitchen he purchased with me in mind, but not going to the grocery store or planning my own recipes is getting old.

  After that, we retire to the living room, either to read or mess around on our laptops for a few hours before bed.

  We have sex once a week because even though he doesn’t hold himself back from me anymore, he still isn’t willing to put me through more pain than necessary.

  And the pain doesn’t seem to be going anywhere.

  My periods are more manageable than they were when I was on the pill, but I’ll need another hormone injection next month to maintain my current status. I can tolerate him being inside me for maybe five, ten minutes before I can no longer hide my discomfort.

  Rob sighs, bringing my focus back to the present. “Want and don’t want?”

  “Do I really have to write it down?”

  “Just tell me.”

  I don’t expect his response to be agreeable, so I draw a deep breath to brace myself for the inevitable argument. “I want to go home for a while. Mama is already suspicious about me living here, and I haven’t seen my family since we were in town for Jeremy and Alyssa’s wedding. It’s not like I have a job to worry about using all my vacation time, and…I feel like a football wife all over again.”

  Minus the social media presence and completely changed appearance.

  I’m not a football wife so much as a kept wife.