Goblins and Gold

by Lindsey Kelk

  ‘I don’t know what you mean,’ he said, edging in front of the door to block Cinders’s view. ‘I didn’t trick them – they came inside of their own accord.’

  ‘And now you’re going to let them out of your own accord.’ Brian spoke with a warning in her voice. ‘Unless you’d like to explain yourself to the king and queen of Fairyland.’

  ‘Ooh, I say,’ Hansel muttered.

  ‘I know, right?’ Cinders agreed with an impressed whistle. ‘My fairy godmother is the best.’

  The goblin began to turn red. He knew when he was beaten, but it didn’t mean he had to be happy about it. He stamped his foot and shook his head.

  ‘No!’ he shouted. ‘I’m not going to let them out. I still haven’t bought all the things I want. She’s not going anywhere!’

  Brian fluttered her wings and sighed. He always had been a giant pain in the bum.

  ‘Fine,’ she said through gritted teeth. ‘I’ll let them out myself. Zimzamzoom!’

  ‘Go and open the door, Noderick,’ she ordered as Rumpelstiltskin stood and watched with his mouth hanging open in shock.

  ‘Noderick?’ Cinders gasped as a blue-skinned boy with gold and silver hair walked carefully past the sulking goblin and opened the door. ‘Jodders, is that you?’

  ‘It most certainly is,’ he replied. ‘Prince Joderick Jorenson Picklebottom at your service.’

  ‘I still prefer Noderick,’ Brian muttered to Mouse who nodded in agreement as Cinders rushed at her friend and gave him the biggest hug he’d ever received in his life.

  ‘Jodders!’ Cinders cried as Brian’s spell disappeared, returning Joderick to his normal (and slightly more boring now that he came to think about it) colours. ‘What on earth are you doing here?’

  ‘I came to get my trousers back,’ he said, nodding at Cinders’s outfit. She laughed and stuck her hands in the pockets. Quite funny, she thought, but he wasn’t having them. They were the best pair of trousers she’d ever worn in her life.

  ‘Enjoy yourselves while you can,’ Rumpelstiltskin said, still stamping his feet in a strop. ‘But I called the palace earlier today and they’re sending someone with the reward. One hundred gold pieces all for me!’

  Sparks barked in disgust. ‘Magic gold wasn’t enough for you?’

  ‘This is what happens when you’re greedy,’ Brian said. ‘It turns you bitter and mean. Nothing is ever enough.’

  ‘Doesn’t matter what you think,’ the goblin said with a gleeful laugh. ‘I spoke to a very lovely lady called Margery and she said she would send someone out to see me right away. I should imagine they’ll be here any minute.’

  ‘Margery?’ Cinders asked with a gulp. ‘You’re sure you spoke to someone called Margery?’

  ‘Oh, yes,’ he confirmed. ‘I wrote it down so I’d know who to complain about if the money didn’t show up.’

  ‘Classic Rumpy,’ groaned Brian. ‘All right, everyone, I think we should get out of here. I’ll deal with him later. If the palace knows where you are, there’s every chance they’ve sent a very specific someone to find you.’

  ‘My dad?’ Cinders said hopefully.

  Joderick shook his head.

  ‘My stepmother?’ she asked, considerably less hopeful.

  ‘I’m afraid not.’ Joderick gulped. ‘My dad was so mad when I came to find you, he sent …’

  But, before he could finish his sentence, a BIG, booming voice interrupted.

  ‘HE SENT ME.’

  Everyone turned as one to see a tall man with a thick beard, mounted on a huge black steed. He was dressed head to toe in black, and a very shiny silver axe hung from his belt.

  That’s a very impressive beard, thought Rumpelstiltskin.

  That’s a very scary axe, thought Hansel.

  That’s a very good-looking horse, thought Mouse, batting his eyelids at the other horse.

  ‘Prince Joderick and Cinders,’ the Huntsman boomed. ‘You are to come with me, by order of the king.’

  Cinders, finally free of the goblin’s house, felt her fingers tingle with magic.

  ‘What if we don’t want to go with you?’ she asked fiercely.

  ‘If it’s quite all right with you, I’m going to pop back inside,’ Rumpelstiltskin said. ‘I think I’ve left the hob on.’

  ‘No, you haven’t,’ Hansel said.

  ‘No,’ he agreed, running inside and slamming the door. ‘I haven’t.’

  ‘You will both come with me of your own free will or I’ll take you against it,’ the Huntsman replied, one hand on his axe. It seemed to Cinders that he was really rather hoping that they’d refuse to do things the easy way.

  ‘I’ve got a plan,’ Hansel whispered to Cinders. ‘Do you trust me?’

  She nodded right away.

  ‘Okay, then, just do as I say,’ he said before walking up to the Huntsman, as brave as brave could be. ‘My friends won’t be coming with you today,’ he said in a wibbly-wobbly voice.

  ‘Is that so?’ replied the man in black. ‘And why is that?’

  ‘Because they’re going to run!’ Hansel yelled. All at once, he, Cinders, Joderick, Sparks and Mouse all scattered in different directions, leaving the Huntsman and Brian standing in front of the goblin’s house. The Huntsman looked very annoyed, but Brian couldn’t stop laughing.

  ‘You’ve got to give it to the kid,’ she said, pressing her hand into her side. She’d laughed so hard, she’d given herself a stitch again. ‘He certainly fooled you there.’

  ‘He didn’t fool me!’ the Huntsman growled. ‘I’ll have them all rounded up in no time at all.’

  With an angry flourish, he spun round on his horse and set off after his prey.

  ‘Oh,’ Brian sighed, wiping away a happy tear. ‘It does the heart good to have a giggle sometimes. But I suppose I’d better help them.’

  Everyone was running as fast they could, coming together as they reached the marketplace where the stallholders were packing up for the day.

  ‘What shall we do now?’ yelled Hansel.

  ‘Where shall we go?’ wailed Joderick.

  ‘Has anyone got any sausages?’ shrieked Sparks.

  But Cinders stayed quiet. There was no way they could outrun the Huntsman forever, and there was no way he was going to let them go without a fight. He was just so scary. If only they could scare him somehow.

  ‘I thought you’d never ask,’ Brian said, suddenly appearing at her side. ‘I know how to scare him.’

  ‘Did you just read my mind?’ Cinders gasped.

  ‘Don’t look so surprised – you were practically shouting,’ Brian grumbled before leaning in and whispering in her goddaughter’s ear. ‘Got it?’

  ‘Got it,’ Cinders confirmed with a grin before pulling a cookie out of her pocket. ‘Mouse, come here!’

  ‘Did you have that in your pocket the entire time we were in the goblin’s house?’ asked Hansel with wide eyes. ‘You knew I was starving!’

  ‘She really is a mind-reader!’ Joderick gasped, staring at Brian in admiration.

  ‘Now is not the time for a discussion about food,’ Cinders cried as she took a big bite of the cookie, chewing quickly. ‘Quick, here he comes!’

  As the Huntsman galloped closer and closer and closer, Cinders climbed on Mouse’s back and whispered something to her friend. He squeaked in agreement and Cinders sat up with a smile on her face.

  ‘Gotcha!’

  The Huntsman swooped by and scooped her up off Mouse’s back, but Cinders didn’t struggle at all. Instead she closed her eyes and shouted out: ‘I wish Mouse was a mouse again!’

  Her fingers tingled and sparkled, and gold and silver glitter shot out all around her. The Huntsman’s horse stopped dead in its tracks as the odd-looking horse that had given it a wink began to sparkle in just the same way.

  ‘What are you doing?’ yelled the Huntsman. ‘Keep going!’

  But his horse just stamped its hooves and snorted, tracking backwards away from the glittering horse as it sparkle
d and shimmered and then – – it turned into a little speckled mouse.

  ‘A MOUSE!’ shrieked the Huntsman as his horse reared up on its hindquarters. The big, burly man was so afraid of the little, squeaky mouse that he let go of Cinders, who floated to the floor and landed on her feet.

  ‘Well, I’ll be,’ muttered Sparks, more impressed at Cinders’s graceful landing than the big, burly Huntsman being afraid of a tiny little mouse.

  ‘Get it away from me!’ the fearless Huntsman squealed, covering his eyes with his hands. ‘I hate mice!’

  ‘That’s our cue to leave,’ Brian said, appearing beside the group and snapping her fingers. ‘Bye, Hunty!’

  And then Cinders and Sparks and Mouse and Hansel and Prince Joderick Jorenson Picklebottom all disappeared

  ‘Where are we?’ asked Cinders, wrapping her arms round herself. She was shivering from head to toe. Wherever Brian had wished them away to was very, very cold. There was even snow on the ground and, the last time Cinders had checked, it was practically spring.

  ‘We’re on the mountain pass,’ Brian replied. ‘And, if anyone asks, no, I most certainly did not magic any of you through a shortcut.’

  Cinders smiled gratefully, even if her teeth were chattering the whole time.

  ‘This part of your journey isn’t going to be easy,’ Brian warned as she produced three very big, thick jumpers from her tiny little handbag and handed them out to Cinders, Hansel and Jodders. ‘The mountain pass can be very treacherous and, if you thought munklepoops were bad, wait until you get a load of a klankinsaur.’

  ‘Are you sure you couldn’t magic us a little bit further along?’ asked Sparks as Cinders yanked a perfectly sized doggy jumper over his head.

  ‘Quite sure,’ Brian replied crisply.

  Hansel looked at Joderick’s red jumper and Joderick looked at Hansel’s blue jumper and the two happily swapped with friendly smiles.

  ‘Before I forget, I found something in my dad’s desk that I wanted to show you,’ Joderick said to Cinders, digging around in his pocket and pulling out the square of silk that held the very old painting. ‘Don’t you think it looks like you?’

  ‘Good golly gosh!’ Cinders breathed. ‘It really does. If my hair was neater and my nose was smaller, this could be a painting of me!’

  ‘I should think it does look like you,’ Brian said, peering over Joderick’s shoulder to take a closer look. ‘That’s a painting of your mother.’

  Everyone – Hansel, Joderick, Sparks, Cinders and even the tiny mouse, Mouse – gasped.

  ‘That’s my mum?’ Cinders asked, staring at the smiling girl in the painting. ‘But why would the king have a painting of my mum?’

  Brian did not reply straight away. She knew she had already said too much. The deal was that she could guide her goddaughter and help her when she was in need, but she couldn’t tell her exactly what had happened. That would break her promise, which would break the truce, which would result in something very bad indeed. Cinders would just have to figure this one out for herself.

  ‘Perhaps he collects paintings?’ she said with a shrug. ‘If I were you, I’d put that away. Doesn’t look like it would take more than a few snowflakes to ruin it and, judging by those storm clouds overhead, you’re going to have to deal with more than a bit of snow before the night is out.’

  Cinders nodded, but her heart sank as Jodders carefully wrapped the painting up and put it back in his pocket. All she wanted to do was curl up in a corner somewhere and stare at the painting. If only it could come to life and answer her questions. She had so many.

  ‘Very impressed with the wishing back there,’ Sparks said, giving her a big old lovely lick. ‘And the way you floated down from the horse? A plus, I should say.’

  She smiled and gave her doggy pal a hug. ‘Thanks, Sparks,’ she whispered.

  ‘Your magic is getting more advanced,’ Brian agreed. ‘The closer you get to Fairyland, the more powerful it will become. But don’t go getting cocky. The more powerful you are, the more trouble you can find yourself in.’

  ‘I’ll be careful,’ promised Cinders. ‘Wait a minute, what do you mean the closer I get to Fairyland? You’re not leaving again?’

  Brian clapped her shoulder and set her face in what she hoped passed for a supportive smile.

  ‘I am,’ she confirmed. ‘But only because I have to. You’ll be in Fairyland before you know it and I’ll be there waiting for you. All of you.’

  Brian took her hand from Cinders’s shoulder and, for a moment, she felt even colder. But then a warm hand squeezed her other shoulder. It was Hansel.

  ‘We’ll get through this,’ he told her. ‘We’ve got this far, haven’t we?’

  ‘And I’m not going anywhere,’ Joderick added, placing his hand on her other shoulder. ‘In fact, I’m quite excited about the adventure now that I’m certain the fairies aren’t going to eat me.’

  ‘I might give it a go if you don’t stop being so cheesy,’ Brain said, making a yucking sound that Sparks secretly sort of agreed with. ‘Get on with you all – you want to travel as far as you can before dark. When the sun sets, find shelter right away. The last thing you need is to be out here when the bolves come out to hunt.’

  ‘Bolves?’ asked Cinders, not sure she really wanted any further explanation.

  ‘Imagine a wolf crossed with a bear,’ Brian replied. ‘Without the sense of humour, but with a more dazzling fashion sense.’

  ‘Fantastic,’ said Joderick, puffing out his princely chest. ‘I can’t wait to see one.’

  ‘Righto,’ muttered Brian. ‘Looks like the five of you can take care of yourselves.’

  Without waiting for anyone to protest, she disappeared into thin air.

  ‘The good thing is, we don’t have to take care of ourselves,’ Hansel said as Cinders scooped Mouse up out of the snow and slipped him safely inside her pocket.

  She looked at her friend, a little bit confused.

  ‘We don’t?’

  ‘We don’t,’ he confirmed. ‘Because we can all take care of each other.’

  ‘Last one to Fairyland is a rotten munklepoop!’ cried Jodders, thrusting his arm into the air and running up the mountain pass, only to be overtaken by a very game Hansel, who whooped and laughed as he raced by.

  ‘Maybe we could sneak back the other way and leave them to it,’ Sparks suggested. ‘I don’t think they’d even notice if we weren’t there.’

  ‘I think it’ll be best if we all stick together,’ Cinders said with a very real smile on her face. ‘The five of us on our way to Fairyland. What could possibly get in our way?’

  ‘WHAT DO YOU MEAN THEY ESCAPED?’

  The king was apoplectic.

  ‘I say “escaped”, but what I really mean is that they managed to temporarily get away from me,’ the Huntsman replied, his head bowed, squatting down on one knee. He was feeling very awkward. He’d never had to explain why he’d failed before, and he wasn’t very good at it.

  ‘And how exactly did they get away from you?’ the king asked.

  His eyes were very wide and his mouth was very small and, from where she was sitting, the queen could have sworn he was vibrating.

  ‘Obviously they used great cunning and magnificent evil, and there were dozens of warriors with many weapons and also, possibly –’ he looked down at his big black boots in shame – ‘a mouse.’

  ‘Be gone,’ the king ordered. He couldn’t even bear to look at him. ‘Get out of my sight.’

  ‘If you give me one more chance, sire, I will return the prince to you post-haste,’ the Huntsman promised.

  ‘You’re lucky I’m letting you keep your head,’ King Poderick replied. ‘Guards, take him to the dungeons. And make sure to fill his cell with cheese.’

  ‘Noooooooo!’

  Before the king’s guards could act, the mighty Huntsman leaped to his feet and ran across the throne room.

  ‘I refuse to surrender to those squeaky, cheese-eating monsters!’ he be
llowed.

  And then he dived out of a window.

  ‘Didn’t see that coming,’ the king muttered in surprise. ‘Well, I suppose that’s that.’

  One of the pages dashed over to the window to have a look. Down below, he saw the Huntsman climbing out of the palace moat, limping as he ran off into the Dark Forest.

  ‘He’s run off, Your Majesty,’ he confirmed. ‘Should we send someone after him?’

  ‘Not unless you’ve got another Huntsman up your sleeve,’ the king grumbled. ‘Now what are we supposed to do?’

  ‘You could always go after Joderick yourself?’ the queen suggested.

  Everyone in the throne room held their breath.

  ‘Uh, yes,’ the king said, taking off his crown and polishing it on the sleeve of his robe. ‘I could do that. That’s something we should look into. Advisers!’

  At once, his team of trusted counsellors, consultants and confidants crowded round him.

  ‘Yes, Your Supreme Wonderfulness?’ The first one to speak bowed low and deep.

  ‘How may we assist you?’ asked another.

  ‘What do you think is the best way to get Joderick back to the palace and make sure this Cinders girl is gone for good?’ he asked.

  ‘I think, having taken all the options into account, such as the length of time he’s been missing, the distance from the palace, the failure of the Huntsman, the little girl’s magic powers, not to mention all this talk of mice …’ The first adviser paused as all the others murmured in agreement. ‘I think the best course of action would be to follow the queen’s suggestion. You should go after Joderick.’

  No one looked more surprised than the queen herself.

  ‘Follow my suggestion?’ she asked. ‘Oh, I don’t know if that’s such a good idea. If only because it’s quite possible that it has never actually been done before.’

  ‘It’s a very good idea,’ said the second adviser, stroking his long beard.

  ‘A strong suggestion,’ agreed the first. ‘The queen is very wise.’