Trusting Love Again

by Starla Kaye

  He wasn’t up to her pissy attitude. To his disgust, she had never warmed to Toni, like Ellen had. If she hadn’t been a good receptionist, and more than capable as a legal secretary, he would have already let her go. “She needed the day off,” he said flatly. He didn’t want to talk about the matter more than that.

  But she didn’t take the hint. She huffed and shook her head. “Will the court allow that? I believe she still owes you another twelve days.”

  Twelve days? The thirty days was going by far too fast. He didn’t want her to leave the office; wanted her to stay on, but she’d told him no. He understood her reasoning, but he still hoped he could change her mind. He liked her being at the office, even on the days he wasn’t.

  He put his frustration with that situation aside and looked pointedly at Mrs. Hamilton. “It isn’t your concern. I’m confident that Ms. Thornton will give us the full time ordered by the court.”

  Again, he tried to end the discussion. He shifted his concentration to the stack of messages that he wasn’t in the mood to return. Especially to Heath Oxford, who was getting on Chad’s nerves about pressing him to make a decision concerning moving his practice to Topeka. It might be best for a number of reasons and for his position as a strong leader in the group of elder abuse lawyers. He had the most experience. Yet he couldn’t seem to make that decision, either way.

  To his annoyance, the secretary hadn’t moved. He sensed her resentment, then heard it in her voice. “I believe you are far too lenient with her, because you…” She stopped talking, but it was too late in his opinion.

  He narrowed his eyes. “Because I have feelings for Ms. Thornton? Because you disapprove of her, when you don’t really know her?”

  Her pointed chin went up. “I know enough.” She didn’t respond to his admission of feelings for Toni.

  He’d had enough. “I believe we can do without your services any longer, Mrs. Hamilton. You can leave immediately after you gather your personal things.”

  She blinked in astonishment. “You’re firing me? Because I’m not Ms. Thornton’s BFF? I shouldn’t have to be her friend, or even supportive of her. You pay me to work, which I do.”

  “I never expected you to become buddy-buddy with Ms. Thornton. I - we, Dad and I - did expect you to get along with her. I’ve seen absolutely no signs of that. Neither has my father.” He nodded toward the door. “We’ll pay you for your two weeks’ notice. Because you are a competent legal secretary, I won’t fire you for overstepping your boundaries here. I’m letting you go.”

  She glared at him in disbelief for a few seconds. When he didn’t back down from his decision, she strode out of his office.

  His Dad was going to love this new problem, wonder at his son’s sanity. Well, too damn bad. There were enough complications in his life. He wasn’t going to keep putting up with a secretary with a bad attitude.

  ***

  The rock she’d tossed into the pond in the small park just outside of town rippled the water briefly before sinking. Toni had come here many times growing up; playing on the various playground equipment, picnicking with her family, trailing after her brother and Chad as they’d found their favorite fishing spot and tried to discourage her from following them. There were a lot of memories here, good ones. Her memories of the last six years weren’t anywhere close to being good. But she was ready to make a new life and make some new memories that she could look back on and not hurt.

  She attempted to make another rock skip across the water, but it sunk immediately. She’d never been good at it. Of all the people in her life back then, Chad had been the one to patiently work with her on developing the skill. Ted had only teased her about her incompetence at rock skipping. Even with Chad being five years older than her, there were other instances she remembered when he had done things with her. It had been a long time since she’d thought about them.

  Staring out at the water, pulling her coat tighter around her, Toni allowed the warm memories to resurface. She’d been sixteen when Chad had come home from college for the town’s annual parade and dance. Standing at the back of the big community hall, she’d watched him walk in with her brother, both of them with dates hanging on their arms. Envy had curled through her. Her date for the event had changed his mind. Brooding, she’d kept to herself. But Chad had spotted her at the moment she was blinking back tears. She’d tried to move further away from everyone. A few minutes later he found her. He’d stopped in front of her, smiled gently, and then led her onto the dancefloor. She hadn’t resisted. It had only been for the one dance, but it was one of her most special memories.

  Chad. Her heart pinched just thinking about him.

  She knew taking off on a spur of the moment decision wasn’t a mature reaction to his hesitation to support her after she’d confronted Stanley. She didn’t hold it against him, not really. That wasn’t the real issue, not why she’d hurried away.

  Shivering from the cool wind, she watched a pair of ducks land on the pond. Somehow the way they simply swam together comforted her. If only her life were that simple.

  She’d been overwhelmed by everything that had gone on in the courtroom. Facing her former in-laws had been unexpected. Their not acknowledging her presence was not a surprise. More importantly, Stanley had gotten to her again, for a few minutes. The pretentious fool still believed he was in charge of everything; that he could get away with anything.

  She smiled remembering how Judge Turner hadn’t been impressed by her ex-husband’s attitude or his family’s influence. Even though he’d given her a thirty-day sentence for community service, she’d accepted his decision with no objection. The responsibility for what she’d done lay only with her. And, in truth, she’d come to like being at the law firm. Ethan was a good man, always having a kind word for her. Ellen had become a new friend. Chad…Well, that was where it got complicated.

  In another two weeks she would be done working for the firm. An emptiness filled her. But she was right in that they didn’t need her. She intended to stop in the Dine-In Café later today and talk to Elsie Mae and Harold, the owners. Years ago, she had worked there one summer. She hadn’t been too bad at waitressing, so, hopefully, they would give her another chance. She didn’t need it to be a long-term job. All she was looking for now was something to fill her time until she found another house in town or around it that needed some TLC. She wasn’t scared of hard work and she would enjoy giving some tender loving care to a house that she could make into something she could live in for a long time.

  Her cell phone rang and she pulled it out of her coat pocket. She glanced at the caller ID, Ellen?

  “Are you all right? Is something wrong with the baby?” Toni asked in concern. She still hadn’t gone to see them. Somehow time had slipped away, but they’d talked on the phone.

  “No. It’s nothing like that,” Ellen reassured her, sounding happy. “I know of the perfect house for you. Actually, my husband’s great aunt Gracie Yardley owns it.”

  Toni listened eagerly. She would be certain to fully check this out, though. She’d learned her lesson the hard way about not being careful. “This won’t be another problem for me?” she asked, trying not to sound rude. But Ellen knew about what had happened with the Victorian house the law firm had attempted to buy at the same time she had. And Ellen knew the law firm would end up being the new owners.

  “I understand your wariness, but this won’t be a problem. I promise you that.”

  Relief lessened her tension; hope filled her. “Tell me about it.”

  “It’s a big, old farmhouse with touches of Victorian details. The farm itself was sold off long ago when her husband died. But Gracie kept the house, except she hasn’t maintained it very well. Actually, it needs a lot of fixing up.”

  “Where is it at? Can I see it?”

  Ellen laughed at her eagerness. “The family moved Gracie out a month ago, to a nursing home. She needs the money from selling the house. But we all know it isn’t worth much, because of al
l that needs to be done to it.” She hesitated. “But, Toni, I’ve seen it and I think it is everything you want. A challenge for now, but I’m sure it will be a beautiful home when you get done with it.”

  That sounded like exactly what she wanted: a challenge and a home of her own. She listened as Ellen gave her directions so she could go see it, at least on the outside for now. Her spirits were lifted when she disconnected the call. Maybe things were finally looking up for her.

  As she walked back to her car, she thought about Chad. Their situation was still a problem. He would be leaving and she would miss him. But she wouldn’t try to stop him. She could stand on her own now, partly because of him helping her find her self-confidence again. Partly because she’d moved on from what Stanley had done to her. She was finding herself all over again. And that felt good.

  Chapter Twelve

  Chad sat in the chair opposite Alex’s desk, waiting while his friend took an important call. He’d been out of town for the last eight long days and was ready to deal with issues here. He’d wanted to go to breakfast with his Dad and discuss the Topeka problem. And he wanted to get to the office and see Toni. His time away had happened unexpectedly because some meetings and court hearings had been rescheduled for sooner than he’d planned. He hadn’t even had a chance to say goodbye to her, because he hadn’t been able to find her before he’d had to get on the road. They’d talked a few times by phone, but their conversations had been strained. It worried him.

  He glanced at his watch and frowned. While he understood Alex’s need to tend to business, he, too, had matters to handle. If his friend hadn’t caught him on the way out the door to meet his Dad, he would already be…

  Interrupting his thoughts, Alex waved at him from across the large room. “Let’s talk in here.”

  Evidently they needed privacy, which made Chad curious. He got up to follow the other man into the small interrogation room. As he took a seat by the table, Alex closed the door.

  “So, what’s up?” he asked, wondering why Alex had insisted on this early meeting. “Something going on with Beaton? Is he trying to cause problems?” They’d talked about Beaton a number of times while Chad had been gone. He’d been reassured that Toni’s ex-husband had left Petersville, and that he’d gotten assigned community service in Denver. But he wouldn’t be surprised if the man somehow found a way to make trouble again.

  Alex pulled the other chair around and straddled it. “I think we’re done with that man. What an asshole!” He shook his head. “I have no idea what Toni ever saw in him, but then she was younger and ready to fall in love. Too bad it was with the wrong man.”

  Chad nodded agreement. He’d been younger back then, too, and stupid. He’d missed his opportunity with her, regretting it for a long time. But he was getting a second chance. He wouldn’t screw it up this time…unless she wasn’t willing to wait for him to get his head straight.

  “She’s a fine looking woman now, grown up and single again.” Alex looked at him, his eyes solemn as he pulled Chad from his troubled thoughts.

  “I can’t argue with any of that.” Something was going here and it made him uneasy. “Again, what is this about? I have a feeling it’s not just for idle chit-chat.” He studied his friend, concerned. “Does this have anything to do with what has been bothering you lately?”

  “No, it isn’t to chit-chat, as you put it.” Alex’s brow furrowed, and then he pressed, “What are your intentions toward Toni?”

  His intentions? “Seriously?”

  “Seriously.”

  Chad was uncomfortable with the topic. He didn’t know exactly what his “intentions” were, other than getting to know each other better. And hoping for more, if they could talk their latest hiccup out. “You’re not her father. What does it matter to you?”

  Alex blew out a deep breath and still looked intense. “Because she’s a good friend. Because she’s vulnerable now, emotionally. I don’t want to see her hurt again.”

  “A good friend?” Sure, Alex had been around her most of her life, almost as much as he had. But they’d never been much more than acquaintances. Or so he’d thought. Had something been going on between them while he’d been away? He narrowed his eyes. “Am I missing something here?”

  It took Alex a couple of seconds before he answered. “She needed some advice while you’ve been gone. About a house she’s buying. Advice about construction and remodeling issues.”

  And Alex’s father had owned a construction company until he’d died five years ago. Alex had worked with the company in high school. He’d inherited the company when he’d left the service and mainly managed it now, while a reliable crew did the work. But he had a great deal of knowledge on the subject.

  “She mentioned that she was looking at an older house.” She hadn’t told him that she was actually in the buying process. Separated just over a week and already they were growing apart. It worried him.

  “It’s gone way past looking. She should be signing the final papers next week.” Alex met Chad’s gaze, held it. “Back to your intentions, buddy. It’s obvious you’ve been intimate with her at least once, maybe more.”

  Chad stiffened; uncomfortable talking about his relationship with Toni. “That really is a personal matter.” He’d hated that his friend had found him naked and her in only an afghan in her bedroom. Her father had as well. He’d tried not to think about that awkward situation, although he couldn’t forget it.

  “Like I said, she’s susceptible at the moment to…”

  Leaning forward in his chair, Chad frowned and his friend stopped talking. “You don’t think I know that? I’ve seen her crying. I’ve seen her broken. It kills me.”

  “Yet you’ve been gone…”

  “Because I had to be there for those hearings, for those damn meetings. You know that.” Hadn’t he been frustrated enough with the problem? Hadn’t he worried about Toni and how she seemed to be pulling back from him? Hell, yes!

  Alex nodded, then thrust his chin out. “Okay, it was necessary. But, dammit, Chad, she’s important to me, too.”

  “As an old friend?”

  Alex avoided meeting Chad’s eyes. “She was too young for me back then. We weren’t even really friends. But now…”

  “Back then?” Chad’s frown deepened, his stomach knotted. “Are you telling me that you’re romantically interested in Toni? That you’d pursue her if I weren’t involved with her?” The idea was like a punch to the gut. Alex was a good-looking man, but he’d always gone from one woman to the next. None of his break-ups had been bad. He hadn’t been ready to settle down. Was he now? With Toni? God, no.

  “That’s precisely what I’m telling you. She needs a man who will take care of her, share his life with her…be around.” Alex pinned Chad with a challenging look. “Maybe you’ve been watching over her.” His jaw tightened. “Been intimate with her. But you’re not looking for more than a temporary bed partner. Sandy did a real job on you; made you resistant to the idea of marrying again.”

  “She damn sure did.” Why couldn’t he let that go? Still, he didn’t like to cheapen what he had with Toni at the moment. They’d only made love together that one time, but it had been amazing. Their next effort had turned into a complicated, humiliating disaster.

  He focused on his friend. “You don’t care that she and I have been together in her bed? You want to go after her, if I’m out of the picture?”

  Alex nodded. “That’s why I asked you to come here this morning. You’re one of my closest friends. I need to know if…”

  “She’s mine,” Chad protested. But was she really? Or were they merely both reacting on the rebound, although he’d dated many times since divorcing Sandy. He didn’t actually believe that. At least he didn’t want to think that way. She’d become very special to him.

  “Yet you’re not willing to take the next step. In fact, you’re moving away. So where does that leave Toni?” Alex gave him a hard look. “I’m ready to find the right woman and ta
ke the step that scares the hell out of you.”

  Chad tried to control his temper, but he’d reached the peak of his frustration level. “And you think your ‘right woman’ would be Toni?”

  “I think she could be. I’d like to ask her out, see if she might be interested in someone besides you.”

  “Hell, man, you’re killing me. Pressuring me, like those lawyers in Topeka.” He stood and tried to calm down. He didn’t want to fight with his old friend. He also didn’t like the idea of Alex wanting to get to know Toni better. He pushed the subject aside for now. “How did you hear that I was moving away? Even I don’t know that for sure.”

  Alex stood as well, but he leaned a hip on the table to focus on Chad. “Your Dad told me, and he’s pretty sure you will. It’s a good business decision, according to him. But he’s worried about the situation, too.”

  “What situation?” He should have known his father would have already heard about Chad’s problem in Topeka. His Dad had connections with attorneys all over the state.

  “You and Toni. He likes her a lot and, like me, doesn’t want to see her get hurt any more than she has been.” He frowned again and they locked gazes. “We both - your Dad and I - know that’s going to happen. I think she cares for you. A lot. But she won’t say anything because she doesn’t want to influence you either way.” He blew out a breath. “That’s my opinion, though.”

  Alex’s opinion about her not trying to stop him about the Topeka matter was right on the money. Actually, she’d even encouraged him because she knew it would be good for his career. It seemed everyone had accepted that leaving was the choice he’d make. He was the only one not convinced yet.

  Chad strode toward the door, gripped the handle, and faced Alex once more. “My decision hasn’t been made yet. Regardless of that, I wish you’d all stay out of our personal business. Meaning, back off.”

  “I will…until you walk away from the best thing that could ever happen to you. Then I’m going after her.”