"That's when you leave until they respect you. If he’s worth it, you take the stand."
Not what I expected from Marina's mother. "Walk away from my family?"
"Not forever. There are times when you must take a stand for what you want. I have five daughters. I've had many boys come through my door and I didn't approve of all of them."
"You're different." I smiled at her.
"You're not like any of my daughters either. Doesn’t make either of us wrong. Why did you come here today, Lori?" she asked.
I thought about that for a minute. "Right now I need advice. What do I do?"
"First, you have to figure out if you really want Nick or if you just want to rebel. You might want to rebel and you’re hung up on the drama. Even if your family doesn’t know about it, it’s still rebellion. Again. Using him for that isn't right."
I processed the words and stored them. "What if I'm not rebelling? What if he's the one?"
"Then you hold on to him and let your family do what it's going to do. You never know, they might not act the way you expect. Once your decision is made, you don't go back on it. The hard part is listening to your heart. Your brain tries to get in the way too much. You and Marina have that much in common."
I nodded slowly and felt better. There was no answer in the advice, far from it. I had more thinking to do. It was comforting. "Thanks," I said.
"Are you going to talk to Nick?" she asked.
I got up and paused. "Not yet. I have a lot of thinking to do first."
"Good, you were listening. I’m proud of you." She smiled and walked with me out to the front of the shop. “Come back any time.”
“Thanks, I will.” I hugged her before she let me out. I wandered back to my car in a daze. I drove home with my brain whirling.
I'd spent so much time thinking about what would happen if I tried to see him. What he’d do or say. What I’d do. Then what my family would say if they met him. I never for one second considered whether I'd been using Nick to break loose of my parents or whether it was deeper. Before I got myself worked up about anything else, I had to figure that out.
Chapter Eight
Jen At It Again
Four days had passed since I’d met Lucas. I’d tried my best, only I couldn’t stop thinking about him. Once I’d found out who he was that day, I’d pretended to be late for work and left. He’d given me his cell number before I got away. I felt bad blowing him off but didn’t know what else to do.
I didn’t know if I wanted to call or what to say if I did. I stared at the phone. Circled it, picked it up, and even dialed Lucas' number, then hung up. This was the sort of thing I needed a second opinion on. I’d considered asking Lori, but she and Marina were too close. Lori wouldn’t keep that type of secret from her.
If only Marina’s ex weren’t Lucas, I wouldn’t have a problem, I’d have a date. A real date with a nice guy. He had a job and went to the gym. I’d seen his place of work and the stinky gym bag for myself. I’d been lied to often enough by men. Lucas wasn’t like that.
It was my day off. Instead of the twenty errands I had to run, I was frozen thinking about my best friend’s ex. I needed to do my laundry. I was down to my granny underwear, as Marina would call them. I also needed to finish the deal I’d struck. I had to talk to Lucas about Marina and keep my end of things.
I didn't know if I could do this. I needed more information. If I were near him, I'd have a hard time staying focused.
I didn’t want to do it over the phone—I wanted to see him again!
Back in my bedroom, I checked my appearance. I'd left my hair down and my blouse slightly open. This time my skirt was a little shorter and my heels a little higher.
I checked my make-up, Marina had come through with the essentials and I’d put them on without looking scary. I dabbed on perfume and turned off my brain. I grabbed my purse and coat. No turning back now.
I ran to catch the El and squeezed in the compartment. I had to see Lucas, to explain things. At least that’s what I was telling myself. Most importantly, I had to explain why I couldn't date him. He’d asked me out and I’d avoided answering.
What had I been thinking? Until the weekly meeting I'd let myself actually dream about Lucas. Not just dating him, but x-rated dreams. Lori and Marina would’ve been very proud of me. Objectifying and lusting after a man I barely knew. He wasn’t just good on paper, he had a good body and I wanted him. How sick was I?
On the bright side, I finally got it! I finally felt that lust and passion for a real guy who was available. I couldn’t share it with my friends. I couldn't tell them I wanted my best friend's ex-boyfriend. Marina would blow it off and let me have him. That was her nature.
Lori would kill me.
As I got off the train, I realized what a terrible friend I was. I had to do better this time. Tell the truth and not get swept in by his charm. The guilt was eating at me and I had to settle it somehow.
I entered the building as the lunch rush was letting out. I didn't want to make a scene in his office or get him in trouble at work. Standing on a convenient bench, I hoped I wouldn't miss him in the sea of people.
Finally, I spotted him and moved toward him, calling his name. It was noisy, but I was louder. I didn’t want to miss him. I got close and grabbed his arm. He turned and removed his tiny headphones with a grin.
"Hi," I said. Not a brilliant opening line. I wasn't flirting, I reminded myself. Not this time. This time I was in control.
"Hey, what are you doing here?" he asked.
We moved to the side to avoid getting run over or the finger from people trying to make the most of their lunch hour. "I was in the neighborhood," I lied.
"I'm glad. I was hoping you'd call. I really want to get your number." He pulled out his cell phone and I could tell he was ready to program it in.
"I have to talk to you about something. The thing." I suddenly sounded like I rode the short bus in school. What was wrong with me?
"Want to go to lunch?" he asked. Lucas wasn’t an easy man to say no to. And Marina and Lori believed there were no truly nice guys left in the world.
"Didn't you have plans?" I looked around self-consciously. As though Marina was going to appear and object. Lori was who I had to fear if I blew it.
"Nothing that can’t wait until after work." He took that as a yes and steered me toward that same little restaurant we went to before. I couldn’t say no. It might be easier to talk over food. Too early for a drink, yet I wanted one.
"Did you get the job?" he asked.
My mind had been so focused on the feel of his hand on my back that I barely heard the question. That was right, I’d told him about my interview. "I haven't heard yet. I'm going to call because they may be behind. Opening a restaurant is more work than running one."
We ordered and I tried to think of something else to talk about. I didn't want this to be over so soon. Why ruin the meal? Why not make it last?
"Are you worried about the job?" he asked.
"No, I was just thinking." I realized I'd been quiet too long.
"About me?" He grinned.
"You’re sure you don’t have a girlfriend?" I blurted and turned bright red.
"No, I'm trying to ask this cute girl out. She keeps changing the subject and won’t give me her number. She just appears and disappears from my life like a ghost. Maybe she’s not real." He leaned in.
I knew I should back away. We were in public. I’d never made out with a man in public. This wouldn’t be a quick kiss, I hoped. Lucas wasn’t just any man, Marina’s ex. He'd slept with Marina. But he felt, tasted, and smelled too good.
His mouth was warm and soft, not too pushy, definitely confident. Marina was right about one thing, he knew what he was doing with his hands and mouth. I could only imagine how good he’d be in bed. I already had.
I heard the plates land on the table and pulled away. I was making out with a man I barely knew in a public place. The odds of getting caught by M
arina or Lori were slim, they were both at work. I felt the same terror being caught by the waitress.
"Sorry." The waitress grinned at Lucas and winked approvingly at me.
"Will you go out with me?" he asked.
I took a French fry and chewed slowly. Instead of pushing, he handed me the ketchup. He remembered I like ketchup. I felt myself melting like a sap and looked into those soft blue eyes. He was too good to be true. Of course, there was one glitch, Marina.
"Okay," I said.
"Okay? Was that a yes, you'll go out with me?" He wanted confirmation.
"Yes, first we need to have that discussion." I put the condition out there so now he’d force me to talk. The option of avoiding the topic was tempting. I couldn’t do that to Marina, though.
"I'm ready when you are." He took a big bite of his burger and washed it down with root beer. Root beer. For some reason I found that cute. I hadn’t had root beer since I was little, and I’d loved it. And it was cute on him. He wasn’t ordering a beer or something macho. What a romantic sap I was.
"I want you to meet a friend of mine first, Marina." I waited for a reaction. His face remained blank as he chewed.
"Who?" he asked.
"Marina." If he didn't remember Marina I'd just lost all respect for him. If he was the type of man who forgot women as soon as he was done with them, I'd change my mind quickly. There had to be more than one Marina in all of Chicagoland. Plus it had been a few years.
"Oh." He nodded. "You want a friend to meet me in case I’m an ax murderer?"
"No, you went out with her a few years ago, Marina Castini. She's also one of my best friends." I didn't know what else to say.
"And my ex. Is that why you came looking for me?" he asked slowly.
I nodded. "It's a long story. I need to make sure you're not still interested in her."
"She sent you to find that out?" He looked confused. “Why wouldn’t she contact me directly? Not that I’m sorry, I got to meet you this way.”
"That’s not really the whole story. It's a thing for our other friend, Lori. To get Lori to agree, we all had to pick ex's to look up. Marina picked you. I wasn't supposed to pick you up."
"If I remember our first meeting, I picked you up—literally." He smiled again.
"That wasn't supposed to happen either. I'm here to find out if you're worth a second look by her, not for me to be attracted to you."
"And if I'm not interested in her?" He shrugged. “Then what?”
"I never thought of that. I mean Marina is gorgeous, smart, and confident. I wish I were half as confident as her. You know how she is."
"Don't put yourself down or I might not take you to dinner." His hand was on the back of my neck massaging softly. “You’re unique.”
"You barely know me. I know you two didn't have a ton in common. Neither do we. Don't you think you deserve to see her to be sure? You and Marina had something. There isn't anything really between us, yet. Won't you at least meet her for lunch and see?" The guilt was killing me. I wanted them to smooth things over so I could be sure whether I could date him with a clear conscious or not.
Lucas rested his head back against the large booth. "Will you be there?" he asked.
"If you want me to." I didn't think that would be comfortable, but if it got him there.
"That's the only way I'll go. And then we'll have dinner that night."
"You seem awfully sure you won't want Marina back." I didn’t trust that. Marina was a strong personality and gorgeous.
"I'll keep an open mind." He put his hand on his heart and then stole one of my fries.
I hadn't even touched my lunch, I realized. With things finally settled, I was starved. "I'll talk to Marina and let you know when."
"Make sure to use my cell. My business line gets jammed and I don't want to miss it," he added.
"No problem." He was very particular about that cell phone. I started to wonder if he was holding something back. Marina did say he lived his job and it was high pressure. Maybe everyone got him on his cell.
Then I remembered the first time I called him at the office and it went through the receptionist. Maybe personal calls at his firm were monitored and it would get him in trouble. It wasn’t like he owned the company.
Either way, I had a date with him, and Marina, and hopefully it’d all be out in the open and I might be able to date Lucas after all. First, I had to make sure that Marina got her chance. She’d had him first. This should be strange and uncomfortable. Once I saw them together maybe it’d hit me.
~* * *~
After lunch, I’d wandered the streets, keeping an El track in sight so I wouldn’t get lost. I’d been trying to figure out how I was going to bring this up to Marina. Eventually, I got cold and came home.
I did the laundry and cleaned the apartment. I still didn’t know what to say to get Marina to come to lunch. When the clock read six p.m., I knew she’d be home. If I didn’t do it fast, I’d never do it and then this mess would just continue. I had to get them together so they could be sure they weren’t right for each other. I needed a clean conscience.
Ignoring how obviously selfish I was being, I grabbed a chilled bottle of red wine and padded in my sweats and fluffy orange Garfield socks from my open door over to Marina’s. I knocked, knowing it would be locked.
She opened the door and I waved. “Are you busy?” I could tell she’d just gotten home.
“No, come on in.” Marina left the door open and headed back to the kitchen as though nothing was out of the ordinary To her, nothing was. She didn’t know what I’d done. What I was about to drop on her. Should I tell her how I felt or just wait and I see how the lunch went? That was my sticking point. I feared it’d just spill out of me once I started talking.
“How was your day off?” she asked.
“Good. No news on the job yet.” I knew if I told her I was interested she’d probably tell me to take him and refuse to go to lunch. She hadn’t really been that interested in Lucas to begin with. That was the easy way out.
“My sister sent over some dinner. Like I’m going to waste away. Are you hungry? There’s enough for four people.” Marina opened the microwave to check on it and then closed it, adding time.
“Sure. I’ve got wine.” I was barely listening.
“Great, open it while I go change.” She headed to the bedroom and I began the routine task of uncorking wine as my brain spun wildly.
My other option was a lot harder, though much more honest. At least I was getting Marina and Lucas together for their true reactions. If Marina had taught me one thing since we began this little game, it was what people said wasn’t always what they felt.
Of course I knew that, and it applied even to my very best friends. Lori had lied to Marina and me when she said she was over Nick. It was clear as anything she wasn’t. She was being stubborn.
That was settled, I definitely wouldn’t tell Marina I wanted her ex. Because this way would give Marina a real chance to see him again, I told myself.
Deep down I knew it was because I didn’t want to see the reaction. What if she’d harbored a secret desire to be back with him and just couldn’t admit it even to herself, like Lori. Maybe Marina was just better at hiding things and there was an outside chance for her and Lucas.
“Forget where I keep the glasses?” Marina was next to me taking two glasses down from the cabinet above my head. I had just been standing there, wine cork in one hand and the corkscrew in the other.
I shook myself awake. “Sorry, I was daydreaming.” I took the glasses from her and began to pour.
“Must be a good dream.” Marina shrugged.
“Yeah, that I got the job at the restaurant.” I’d been a tad too enthused.
“You’re a terrible liar, Jen.” Marina checked the food again and removed it from the microwave steaming. “What’s going on?”
“Nothing.”
“Nothing? You never hang out here. You hate my mess,” Marina pointed out.
/>
She spoke the truth. Her couch had a sweatshirt over the arm; there was yarn in the recliner, and magazines and newspapers all over her coffee table. “I just wanted to talk about Lori and figured she’d never look for us here together. How are things going with Nick?”
Marina nodded and seemed to accept that excuse. “Nothing new really., I’m more and more convinced Nick is perfect for Lori. He seems all calm at first and turns out to he’s every bit the pain in the ass drama queen she is. What a mess.” She dished out food onto funky plates her cousin had hand-painted for her and gave me a plate full of pasta and bread.
“There is such a thing as too much carbs, Marina.” I couldn’t eat all that if I tried.
“No wonder you’re almost as skinny as Lori. Your mother never fed you.” She rolled her eyes and sat cross-legged on the couch.
“I ate a big lunch too.” That was the truth. I’d eaten a burger and fries with Lucas and rarely ate two big meals a day. I’d never finish all of this.
“You’ll take the rest home. I certainly don’t need it.” Marina took a swallow of wine. “Anyway, Nick’s pissed off at me because he thinks I called his sister to try to get him to talk to Lori.”
“Did you?” I asked.
“No, I didn’t even know he had a sister. Lori might’ve mentioned it. I didn’t remember to play that angle. I’m not stalking the bastard. I only wanted to talk to him. Lori had gone on about his great family when they were together but mostly about him. Never got that specific. This guy at the garage, Eddie, sort of cute and a massive flirt, is going to help me with some info on Nick.”
“That’s good. What about the sister?” I frowned, trying to keep up with Marina’s super fast mind and mouth was a challenge. The thought of what it must be like when she and all her sisters got together boggled my mind.
“Wait, it gets better. Then I find out Eddie used to date Nick’s sister, and he called her to get info on Lori. That’s how she found out I was trying to get them back together. Then she called Nick and now he thinks I called her to get her on my side. If I wanted a soap opera, I’d watch one. I did not want to get involved in one. Why did I do this?” Marina groaned.
Best in Bed Page 11
