from Pain to Pleasure (Gainesville Book 1)

by Jeanisse, Bella

  “Just tell me what you need,” Logan said as he stopped next to Alex. He laid a hand on his shoulder. “How about we go talk?”

  Alex nodded and got to his feet. “Mom, can you help Danielle eat when her food comes?”

  “Sure.” Mary sat in his chair. “Dad’s parking the rental.”

  Logan led Alex to an empty waiting room for families. They sat, and he watched. He expected Alex to rant about what was in his head. Since he stayed silent, he asked, “Did you sleep?”

  “Sorta.” Alex shrugged. “They have her on some heavy drugs, so she barely moved. I just held her and took naps.” He hung his head and fisted his hair. “My kid can’t die. He just can’t.”

  Since he knew Alex well, Logan squeezed his shoulder. “He won’t. The doctors know what they’re doing.” What else could he say? “Did you talk to Nathan?”

  “No.”

  “Maybe you should.” Logan sighed. “If you can’t talk to me, maybe you can talk to him.”

  Alex shook his head. “He doesn’t need this crap on his shoulders.”

  “Then tell me. Tell me whatever.”

  “OK.”

  Chapter 37

  “You sure you don’t want me to go?” Alex stood in his room and stared at Danielle. “It’s just practice.”

  She frowned. “You’re not going.” Sara and Marie planned to take her to pick out a wedding dress while Alex went to the first spring practice. “You can’t see my dress before the wedding.” She rubbed her stomach and sighed. “And how would it look if you ditched after you get second string?”

  “Yeah. I know.” Alex looked over at Sara, who sat at his desk. “At least you won’t be alone.”

  Marie burst into the room. “I’m not late. Right?”

  “No.” Sara tried not to laugh at her overprotective baby brother. “Alex has been trying to weasel his way into our girls’ evening.”

  Danielle sat on his bed and laughed. “Go to practice.”

  “OK. Fine.” He leaned down and kissed her lips softly. “Please take it easy, and sit when you feel tired.”

  He was worried. Although since the surgery, things had gone smoothly. She was almost at 26 weeks, so she was past the danger zone. They hoped the cerclage would hold for at least 10 more weeks. He hadn’t been away from her since the hospital. It killed him to let her go. He stood between her legs and threaded his fingers through her hair. So beautiful. He couldn’t help but grin.

  “Call me if anything happens.” His expression turned serious. “Anything.”

  She nodded as much as his hands allowed. “I will. Promise I’ll take it easy. Sara and Marie won’t let me overdo it.”

  “You know I’m a tyrant,” Marie chimed in. She was. Anytime Danielle showed the slightest distress, Marie forced her to lie down. “Dr. Greene said four hours. We’re going to stick to it.”

  Alex and Marie even had classmates watch out for Danielle’s well-being. She had a crate in each class to put her feet on. Whenever she had to leave a class because of pain or exhaustion, someone walked with her to meet Alex, Marie or Logan. They took turns missing class. She was grateful but felt like they ran her life at times.

  “OK.” Alex sighed. “I’ll go.”

  Gary stuck his head into the room. “You ready, Hicks? We gotta go.” He ogled the three women while he bit his bottom lip. Too bad they were all hands-off.

  “Yeah.” Alex kissed Danielle’s lips one more time. “Text me if you get back before me. Love you.” Another kiss to her forehead.

  She smiled and patted his hip. “Love you, too. I’ll be fine.” She waited until he left to stand. “OK, girls. Let’s get this over with before I change my mind about wearing a dress.”

  Marie frowned. “Why wouldn’t you?”

  Eyes on the floor, Danielle softly replied, “The scars. I don’t want people to see them.”

  “Oh.” Marie quickly hugged her. “We’ll find something that covers them.” She understood Danielle did not want pity. “Wedding gowns are long, so we just have to worry about your back.”

  Danielle glanced at Sara. “And my chest.”

  “Nothing wrong with showing cleavage.” Sara sighed. “Sorry. I forgot. How about lace? I can modify any gown you pick.”

  Marie grinned. “That’s so cool. Lace would work if the pattern is just right.” She winked. “And stockings. I hear Alex loves stockings.”

  “Oh, God!” Danielle regretted that she told Marie about Alex’s obsession with the black stockings. “You weren’t supposed to announce that.”

  Sara laughed. “You think we didn’t hear you that night? Me and Nathan were giggling about it on the boat.” Her room was on one side of Alex’s, and Nathan’s was on the other. “I knew my baby brother was a stud, but damn!”

  “You haven’t heard anything.” Marie burst out laughing. “One morning they were fucking for hours. Alex gets real loud. Sexy as hell too. All that muscle, tattoos and that big di—” She slapped a hand over her own mouth.

  Her cheeks red; Sara broke the silence. “Guess you guys are all real close.”

  “Marie forgets that Alex is mine some days.” Danielle glared at her. “Only mine.”

  “Sorry.” Marie wished she could let her Alex obsession go. “You know I won’t step over the line.” Some days, she wondered if jealousy made the yearning worse. Not that she wanted a committed relationship like they had, but maybe something more? She shook her head. “OK. No more Alex talk.”

  * * *

  Less than 30 minutes later, Danielle looked around the bridal shop in awe. Marie had chosen well. There were hundreds of dresses to choose from. She didn’t know where to start. Thankfully, a woman walked their way.

  “Welcome. I’m Isabella. So who’s the lucky bride?”

  Sara grinned and pointed to Danielle. “She is.”

  “Ah.” Isabella tapped her chin. “So we need a maternity dress. We have a good selection of those. Follow me.”

  After she had tried on 20 dresses, Danielle felt defeated. “They all show off too much.” The one she had on was sleeveless.

  “If you would let me see, I could help you find one.” Isabella didn’t understand why Danielle wouldn’t open the dressing room door.

  Danielle sniffled. “You can’t look.”

  “Honey.” Sara stood outside the door. “Let one of us see. No one will look at…” Her voice softened. “At your scars.”

  Nervously, Danielle unlocked the door. Her watery eyes met Sara’s. “I look so ugly.”

  “No, you don’t.” Sara stood behind her and stared at the mirror. “You’re gorgeous.” She pulled her dark hair away from her face. The blonde was gone. “Let’s find something with sleeves and a higher back.” She left the room to help find a few more options.

  Danielle took off the dress and hung it up before she sat down. Her emotions were all over the place. She was afraid she would never find the right dress. Absently, she wrung her fingers, as she fought a new round of tears.

  “This is it!” Sara cried out. After she had knocked softly, she entered the oversized dressing room. “It’s perfect. The lace is going to blend so well.”

  Danielle stood. She was unsure, but she didn’t want to burst Sara’s bubble. They worked together to shimmy the dress over her swollen belly. It didn’t seem tight. There was just a lot of fabric.

  Sara stepped back and gasped. “Oh, my. That’s even more amazing than I expected.” She checked the midsection. “Enough room for you to grow.” She ran a fingertip along the plunging neckline. “Red lace?”

  Suddenly, Danielle’s eyes lit up. “Alex would love that!”

  As she walked around Danielle, ideas flooded Sara’s head. “We can change the buttons to red too. And I can add a red train if you want.” The dress was meant to be knee length, but with Danielle’s short stature, it was almost ankle-length. “Black stockings and red shoes. Oh, my God. Alex is gonna pass out.” She met Danielle’s finally excited eyes. “Can we show them? Please?”
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  “OK.” She was excited, but also scared the lace wouldn’t cover everything. With her eyes closed, she let Sara lead her into the main room.

  Gasps and shouts of, “Wow,” surprised her. She looked up. Everyone stared, slack-jawed. Their eyes told her they agreed with Sara.

  “Alex is gonna flip.” Marie covered her mouth.

  Isabella moved forward. “You’ll be a beautiful bride.”

  Sara showed everyone where her modifications would go. “Imagine red lace here and here. Then maybe red bows around the bottom edge. What d’ you think?”

  “I can see it.” Marie smiled. “Wow. This is gonna be some wedding.”

  Isabella clapped her hands. “Looks like we have a winner. Now, how about your dresses, girls?” She smiled at Sara and Marie. “Which of you is the maid of honor?”

  “Um…” Danielle hadn’t thought of that. “Well…”

  Marie put a hand on her shoulder. “You don’t have to go with tradition.”

  “Alex is torn between asking Nathan and Logan.” Danielle didn’t think anyone would want to stand up for her. “I don’t know what to do.”

  Sara told her, “Nathan would understand if Alex chose Logan. Just remember one thing. With the traditional reception my mom is planning, whoever you choose will be paired up with who he chooses all day.”

  “Right.” Danielle had seen weddings on television. “Then Marie and Logan would make more sense. They’re a huge part of our lives.”

  Marie had tears in her eyes. “You were going to ask me?”

  “I was afraid to.” Danielle called her a friend but also had trouble trusting her. “Would you?”

  “Of course!” Marie had thought she already asked one of Alex’s sisters. She turned to Sara. “So then, Sara and Carol will be bridesmaids?”

  Danielle’s eyes widened. “I don’t know how any of this works.”

  “That sounds perfect.” Sara smiled. “Three on each side.”

  “Wait.” Danielle sighed. “What about Gary?”

  Sara looked up. “Did you invite any of your family?”

  “Hell no!” Danielle’s eyes drifted to the floor. “Sorry. No one ever helped me. I never want to see anyone but my grandma again, but that’s complicated.”

  Marie suddenly grinned. “I know a job Gary would love.” Her expression turned devious. “He can escort all the single ladies and be everyone’s dance partner. Imagine that hot body in a tux. Mm-mm. Love those dreads.” Everyone laughed. “What? You don’t think he’s hot?”

  “Well…” Danielle blushed. “He’s sweet and handsome.” She had looked at him more times than she would admit.

  * * *

  On the practice field, Alex used all his frustration to knock dummies around and almost broke records with how fast he finished drills. He panted and was sweaty as hell after just 30 minutes. After a drink, he went back for more. He hoped to relieve the stress. It worked quite well.

  When they set up for a short scrimmage, he was glad they switched positions. He looked across the line at Gary and gulped. Although Alex was strong, Gary was bigger. Seconds later, Alex channeled the pain and angst from the last few months and ran at Gary. He knocked Gary on his ass.

  “Shit, man.” Gary laughed. “What’d you do? Pretend I was Brian?”

  Alex shrugged and gave his friend a hand to get up. “Kinda. I didn’t hurt you, did I?”

  “Nah.” Gary gave him one of his famous smiles. Women loved his grin. “Beat on me all you like. Glad you’re finally letting it out.” He had watched Alex hover over Danielle like a mother hen for months, terrified for her.

  With a sigh, Alex frowned. “Yeah. Guess I been preoccupied.” He had kept to working out, but he didn’t talk much. “Hitting things does help. The complications are… well… complicated.” He didn’t want Gary to know he hadn’t had sex in more than a month.

  “Back to the line!” Coach Smith yelled.

  They ran a few more plays. Then the first string players opposed second string for several more plays. Alex was glad to get back to something familiar. Running was his thing. His shoulders were a bit sore. Gary had not gone easy on him. It took a few downs, but Alex scored. He glanced to the mostly empty stands and wished Danielle were there.

  “You OK?” Gary asked Alex as they headed to the locker room.

  Alex nodded. “I’ll be fine.” He was silent until they undressed. “You think you can spot me?”

  “Money?” Gary’s face screwed up. He knew Alex was well off.

  With a chuckle, Alex replied, “No. I wanna work out a bit more.”

  “Seriously? Ain’t you already sore?”

  Alex sighed. “Yeah, but I wanna be exhausted when I get back, so I’m too tired to want her.” With the stitches inside Danielle, he had avoided sex, terrified to hurt her. He felt like he was about to explode. Even jacking off several times a day no longer gave him relief.

  “Ah.” Gary nodded. “Sex is off the table. That sucks. Sorry, man.”

  Unable to explain, Alex nodded as well. “Anything for my son.”

  “When you guys moving?” Gary hung his pads up.

  Alex thought for a few seconds. Dave had offered them two rooms in his house. Since he was to enter the NFL draft the next month, Dave didn’t expect to be home often. “Two weeks after the wedding sounds good. End of May.”

  “You didn’t plan that yet, did you?” Gary understood things were crazy. “If that doesn’t work, we can always do it after that.”

  “Yeah.” Alex backed away from his locker. “I just wanna do some bench presses or something.”

  Gary followed him to the weight room. “You just let me know when you’ve had enough.”

  Chapter 38

  Alex and Gary walked down the hall toward their rooms. The weights had helped some. However, the further they walked, the more his mind turned to his fiancé naked. He growled quietly. Stop thinking of that!

  Gary laughed. “Dude, you’re gonna explode. Just ask for a blowjob.”

  “That’s not fair.” Alex sighed.

  “Wait? No oral either?” Gary was confused. “What kinda surgery did she have?”

  Alex exhaled loudly. “Never mind. I’ll figure something out.” He pursed his lips and wished his dick would behave. “Thanks for spotting me.”

  “Anytime.” Gary stopped at his room. “Call me if she lets you go with us tonight.”

  With a shake of his head, Alex replied, “I’m not going to a strip club with you guys.”

  “You will for your bachelor party—if I have something to do with it.” Gary slapped Alex’s back. “Go take care of your woman, so she can take care of you.”

  Alex shrugged. “Sure.” He continued down the hallway to Danielle’s room. After he knocked, he walked in and smiled when he saw the girls. “Did you find a dress?”

  Danielle grinned. “Yep. I think you’re gonna love it.”

  He tried to keep his mind off the dress, though. Every time he thought of her in a dress, he imagined the thigh-high stockings, also. Then his dick hardened like it was at that moment. He glanced down at his jeans. It wasn’t too obvious yet.

  “I need to get home.” Sara patted Alex’s cheek. “I have some sewing to do.”

  Alex looked at her, confused. “Sewing?”

  “Yep.” Sara kissed his other cheek. “I have a long drive.”

  He pulled his sister in for a hug. “Thanks for everything and drive careful.” He pecked her cheek, and then walked her to the door. “No one talked about the trial. Right?”

  “No.” She knew that subject was off-limits until the next Monday.

  Alex sighed. He worried she would fret about it. Marie and Logan had helped distract her from anything that could remind her of it. There was enough stress as it was. He intercepted all calls from the DA’s office that week.

  Danielle was glad they left the dress in Sara’s car. She watched Alex walk a bit awkwardly toward the door with Sara. Then she stared at his crotch as he came
back. He treated her like a china doll, and it obviously affected him. She wasn’t sure if sex would be the same since the surgery. However, she wanted to try.

  “You OK?” Alex was instantly concerned when he saw her expression.

  She looked up at him. “Fine.” She was more worried about him. “Marie, you guys, taking this room tonight?”

  “Don’t care.” Marie texted with several guys on campus. She wouldn’t tell Logan, but she was bored. A night with someone else was just what she needed. “If you want the room, that’s cool. I think Logan’s next door.” She put her phone in her pocket and collected what she needed for the night.

  Once they were alone, Alex was shockingly nervous. He watched Danielle move around the room, as she got things together for a shower. “Going to bed early?” He knew it was past 8:00, but that was early even for her.

  “No. Just going to take a shower.” Danielle winked at him. “Wanna join me?”

  Alex froze. Why’d she offer that? “Uh… Don’t know if that’s a good idea.”

  “I need your help.” She bit the corner of her lip. “My back is bothering me.”

  He groaned silently and nodded. “No problem. I’ll be back in a few.” He left to get a change of clothes and his toiletries.

  Danielle stashed two of the condoms she had Marie buy in her bag of shower needs. She was nervous. What if I feel different? What if he can’t orgasm because of that? What if I can’t? Questions ran through her mind until Alex walked back in. Her breath caught. He was still the most handsome man she had ever set eyes on.

  “Ready?”

  She bit her lip again, her body filled with need for him. Before she answered, she looked him over. “Yeah.” She couldn’t wait to get him naked. Rarely had she seen his body since the surgery. He wore pajamas to bed and took showers alone. “Are you?”