Don't Judge a Book by Its Cover (The Most Popular Guy in the School)

by Robbie Michaels

  Well out of sight of the house my mom had me stop the car and turn around. We were pointed back toward Bill’s house, but she had me simply park by the side of the road. I didn’t know why, but a moment later I saw the headlights of another car come up behind us. Oh, right, my dad was coming too. I had completely forgotten about that little fact.

  That car, my dad’s car, stopped behind us. He left his car running but hopped out to check on us. My mom gave him a shorthand briefing on what she had seen and what she saw as the potential problem points. I had never seen this type of interaction between them. I was in a bit of shock.

  Several additional cars appeared and parked behind my dad’s car. I lost count finally of how many cars I had seen arrive. At 7:55, my dad stood beside my mom’s car, with me still behind the wheel. A huge number of men and women gathered around us. I saw men I’d known my whole life. I saw small men. I saw big men. I saw my uncles. I saw a couple of aunts. I saw the minister from the church. I saw a cop I didn’t recognize. I saw an old man I’d seen but didn’t know. Where had all these people come from, and how had they all known to come to this specific place at this exact time?

  My dad spoke to the group, giving them a quick summary of the who, the what, the why. My mom recapped what she had seen and her best estimates of things. At eight o’clock exactly, we all got back into our cars and drove up the road with our headlights off. By prearrangement we all stopped in front of the house, but I had pulled far enough past to allow room for the others to stop.

  My mom hopped out of the car. She pulled something from her purse and then threw the purse back onto the car seat. She slipped her hands into her coat pockets, looked at me, and said, “We’re on, kiddo. You ready for this? You ready to go help your friend?”

  “Absolutely.”

  We walked up the snowy and muddy cinder driveway toward the house.

  “Remember, do what I say when I say it.”

  My dad and a bunch of people were following us. The cop had backed his car into the driveway. I saw for the first time that he had another cop with him. One stayed in the car while the other walked up behind us. Using hand signals, my dad directed people into a variety of positions. Before he had my mom and me go to the front door, he had himself and eight or ten others lined up out of sight on the front porch.

  When he nodded to her, my mom said, “Knock on the door. Hard.”

  I walked up the steps, raised my fist, and pounded on the door. While it wasn’t in my character or my nature to be aggressive, there was no way anyone could have missed my knock that night.

  A moment later a man I did not recognize opened the door.

  “Yeah?” he said.

  “I’m here to see Bill,” I said.

  “Who the hell are you?” he demanded in a less than friendly manner.

  “A friend of his from school.”

  “He’s busy,” the man said as he started to step back and try to close the door.

  “Sir!” I said, “It’s really important. I’ll be brief and be out of your way in no time at all.”

  He looked pissed.

  “I said he’s busy. Didn’t you hear me?” he practically shouted at me.

  “I heard you, but I need to see him. It’s a matter of life and death.”

  “I don’t give a damn what it’s about. That kid isn’t going anywhere and he isn’t seeing anybody and he isn’t talking to anybody, and that includes you and your life-and-death emergency.”

  I caught a glimpse of a very worried Bill off to the side of the living room. He had quietly come down the stairs to see what was going on. Apparently it was quite unusual for anyone to come to their house.

  When I saw him I gave him a smile and cheerily said, “Hey, Bill! How ya doin’?”

  The man turned around to see what I saw. “Get back up those stairs now!” he bellowed.

  Bill was frozen in place. It looked like he was sweating bullets, and he appeared to be caught between two polar forces, me on the one hand and his pissed-off dad on the other side.

  My mother stepped up into sight and said, “Bill, so good to see you again. Oh, that’s quite a shiner you’ve got.”

  The man scowled at us. “He slipped on the ice.”

  “Really? I didn’t see any ice. Where?”

  “None of your damned business, bitch.”

  “Oh, my, such language,” she scolded in middle-aged mom fashion. “Bill, we need to talk to you. Oh, and where’s Patty? I haven’t seen Patty in years. We went to high school together, you know. I’ve known her since she and I were both little girls.” And the old mom was back. She was talking a mile a minute in a giant continuous stream-of-consciousness one-sided conversation. The man was a bit surprised, which was exactly what she was going for.

  Another face appeared beside Bill, this time a woman. She looked old, haggard, not at all pretty or even half-alive. “Patty!” my mother shrieked, pushing herself inside the house and walking over to hug her old acquaintance. I immediately followed and stayed glued to her side. With her arms around the woman she pulled her close and said, “Do as I say!” in a quiet but commanding voice. I did the same with Bill at the same moment.

  Turning back to the man, my mom and I stood between him and the two other residents of the house. I stood in front of Bill with one hand reached out behind me to firmly hold his sleeve. My mom did exactly the same thing with the woman.

  “Patty and Bill. You go grab a few things that you need, and you’re coming with us.”

  “What the hell?” the man said.

  My mom looked at him very directly and said, “We’re taking them out of this toxic environment. You are a hazard to their health and well-being. It’s very simple.”

  “You and what army?” he asked as he crossed his arms across his chest and tried to look ferocious.

  He spun around quickly when he heard a voice behind him say, “That would be us.” All the men who had been on the porch had moved into the room, blocking him.

  “And us,” another voice said, coming from the other direction.

  “Who the hell are you people, and what are you doing in my house?”

  “We’re friends,” my mom explained. “And friends look out for friends.” Turning from him, she guided Patty by the arm and said, “Pack a bag.” She walked off with her. By prearranged assignment, I said the same thing to Bill and pushed him upstairs. No words were spoken since no one had a clue what to say in such a situation. All three residents of the house were basically in shock.

  I shoved as many of Bill’s few things as I could into a backpack I had over my shoulder. I knew that my mom was doing the same. One minute later we were all headed back down the stairs, each with our assigned charge. The folks in the living room gave us a clear pathway through the living room to the kitchen. Then we had them out the door and walked them toward our car.

  We got the woman into the backseat with my mom, and I got back into the front seat with Bill. I started the car and cranked the heat up, but we didn’t move. Our orders were to sit tight for a few minutes while those inside held their intervention. I had no idea what was happening inside the house, and I probably didn’t want to know. There were a lot of men, a fair number of women, and a whole bunch of very pissed-off people in that house at the moment.

  My mom turned to look at Bill’s mom and said, “How long has this been going on, Patty?”

  She didn’t answer. Using the rearview mirror I could see that she had her head down and a perfectly blank expression on her face.

  “What?” I heard the woman say.

  “You know very well what I mean. How long has that man been beating you? How long has he been beating your son? How long has this been going on?”

  “He just gets a little upset at times. He works hard.”

  “We all work hard, Patty, but we don’t take it out on the people closest to us.”

  “He works hard,” she tried again.

  I looked at Bill, who had an equally neutral expression
on his face. I couldn’t read what was going through his head. I couldn’t put myself in his shoes—thank God—and I didn’t know what he was thinking. I hoped above all that he knew he was safe now and that he was loved.

  “We’re getting you out of this, both of you. You don’t have to put up with abuse. You are beautiful human beings with sacred worth. No one deserves such treatment. Do you hear me? You do not deserve to be beaten. You deserve respect and love. And that’s what we are going to help you get.”

  Bill spoke for the first time. “What’s going on in there?”

  I answered. “I don’t know. And I don’t want to know. My dad and some family and friends are having a talk with your dad about showing respect for his family. You’re not in this alone.”

  I didn’t realize that five little words could have such impact, but both Bill and his mother started to cry when I said that simple sentence: “You’re not in this alone.”

  “Thank you!” I heard Bill choke out from the seat next to me. He had his arms wrapped around his body and was trying to curl up against the car door. I had locked the doors when we got in, so I knew he wasn’t going anywhere. I wanted more than anything to simply slide over to him and wrap my arms around him. I knew it was wrong, but I also knew that it was the right thing to do so I simply did it. I slid across the seat and wrapped my arms around him as he cried and shook. I felt so helpless, but he told me later that what we did seemed like an utter impossibility to him and his mom. They couldn’t conceive of ever getting out of the situation that was their life.

  Chapter 13

  THIRTY-FIVE minutes later people started to exit the house. They filed out the door, down the walk, and to their cars. One by one their cars started up, each probably cranking up the heat to try to chase away the cold winter air.

  My dad walked up to the window beside my seat and knocked. I let go of Bill and slid over to roll the window down. I looked anxiously at him. He looked exactly the same as he had earlier. He said simply, “We’re done here. Do you two need anything more from the house tonight? We can come back tomorrow and get more things if you think of them.”

  Neither of them wanted anything else, so my dad walked back to his car and we all started to head out. We drove to the church that was about a mile from our house. By prearranged plan, there was a car waiting there with another woman prepared to drive Bill’s mother to a safe house half an hour away. I didn’t realize it at the time, but apparently the first twenty-four hours were really tough for people. My mom and dad had been through this before, so they had made plans that the woman would not be left alone for at least that time period.

  We hadn’t spoken of it, but it was understood by all that Bill was coming with me. There was no way I was letting him out of my sight, now or ever. Period. There was no sense in anyone even trying to talk me out of that. None. Nada. Don’t waste your breath. You’ll only be wasting your time. He seemed to intuitively understand since he didn’t even try to get out of the car when we stopped to transfer his mother to the waiting car.

  It really wasn’t that late when we got home, but we all felt absolutely exhausted nonetheless. Bill needed a shower, and my mother encouraged me to go in with him and stay close to him. Imagine that? Just a few weeks ago we had been afraid to be seen in the bathroom together and now we were being encouraged to do so. Amazing some of the twists and turns life threw our way when we least expected them.

  Bill was quiet and had been all the way home. I still didn’t know what he was thinking and decided that I would let my presence and my hands be the words tonight. I climbed into the shower with him and gently scrubbed his back, his hair, and his chest. He was so still and so quiet it scared me. I just went with my instinct. There was absolutely nothing sexual in my moves. Tonight I just wanted to give the reassurance of a friendly touch. When he was finished I dried him off and bundled him off to bed where I simply wrapped my arms around him. Neither of us said a word for the longest time, but it was clear that neither of us were sleeping.

  With a giant gasp he broke out in the biggest body-wide sob I had ever heard from anyone. I grappled onto him even tighter and simply held on and let him cry. His entire world had been turned upside down and inside out tonight, not that it had been a good world, but it had been his world, the only world he knew. Even when it’s screwed up, if you know the rules by which something operates you learn to play along with those rules to survive.

  He was safe now, but it would take a while to get him into a new headspace to feel safe and comfortable. But I was going to be with him each step of the way. His sobbing gradually lessened to simple tears and then finally gave way to quiet.

  I wasn’t sure if he had fallen asleep. I didn’t think he had. I was sure he hadn’t when he spoke—I’m quick about those things.

  “Thank you.”

  “Of course. I’d do anything for you. I love you.”

  “Why?”

  “Why do I love you?”

  “Yes,” he said quietly.

  “I love you because you are an awesome man. You are the most beautiful soul I’ve ever known. The man you are is very smart, very gifted, and a survivor. You are a caring man.” I was quiet for a moment before I decided to toss in, “Oh, and I like your hair.”

  He actually chuckled a bit. “My hair?”

  “Hey, it’s nice hair. Of course the rest of you isn’t too bad either.”

  “Thank you,” he said softly. “Thank you so much.”

  “Of course. Now, go to sleep so we face tomorrow together.”

  Much to my surprise, he actually did sleep and seemed to sleep relatively well.

  Chapter 14

  I WAS awake before Bill was in the morning, but I stayed in bed to be sure he wasn’t left alone to wake up in a strange place. It was a weekday, but I didn’t know what that meant for us today after the events of last evening.

  We made our way to the kitchen and had breakfast, where I asked my mom what we should do that day.

  “Go to school, of course.”

  “What? Like nothing happened?” I asked.

  “Yes, exactly. Life goes on. Embrace the familiar, the good, the routine. It will give you strength to deal with the bad stuff, the tough stuff.” She looked at Bill and gave him a hug. “You’re safe now, baby. We’re here for you.” I thought he might be cried out after last night, but he still had a few tears left, which he shed while she held him.

  When we were ready she drove us to school. When we got inside Bill looked at me and looked so vulnerable. I wanted to hug him right on the spot. But I knew we were in enemy territory now and such common acts were now strictly forbidden.

  Let me clarify one point: I didn’t hate being gay. No, actually I loved being gay. What I hated was the endless series of hoops straight people made us jump through to live in their world and not ruffle their superficial images of what life was supposed to be. If they were halfway decent people, they’d be making the effort to help us live as ourselves in the world rather than having to act a part that made us look like absolutely everybody else.

  We looked at each other for a moment longer without speaking or moving. “If you need anything at any time today, you come find me,” I said in my strictest voice. “Agreed?”

  He nodded and gave me a hint of a smile.

  “Okay. Go dazzle ’em with your brilliance,” I said.

  “Bite me,” he gently joked.

  “Okay,” I said. “Tell me when and where and I’m there.”

  He actually laughed that time, and for the first time in a lot of hours I felt a bit less uptight than I had been. Had either of us known that someone had overheard my response to him, neither of us would have felt very happy.

  At lunchtime I was at my usual table reading when Bill arrived. That day there was no question of where he was sitting. He was sitting with me. He was at my table. Well, actually I guessed that for today at least he was at our table. We sat with our backs to the rest of the room, which seemed to send the messag
e that the rest of the world should back off. Much to my surprise, the usual array of jock-followers didn’t try to sit with us. I guess that the intensity of our conversation seemed like something they shouldn’t interrupt. Who knows? I’m just glad that they left us alone.

  Later in the afternoon I noticed people looking at me and then quickly looking away when I looked toward them. Strange. In calculus class, the only class that Bill and I had together, even though we didn’t sit together or even anywhere close to each other, I again noticed people staring at me. And this time they seemed to be staring at him too.

  When class ended I headed out, making a point of not approaching Bill or even looking his way. But my exit came to an abrupt halt when I heard one of Bill’s jock buddies ask him a question. “Dude! Why are you hanging out with a faggot?”

  I know it didn’t actually happen, but it felt like my heart skipped a couple of beats. I felt cold all over and even a little lightheaded. Oh, hell! I didn’t have a clue how Bill was going to handle this one. I couldn’t imagine. I assumed that he would have to go along in order to save face and to maintain his standing in the food chain. I was lower down the chain so I could be sacrificed, but I didn’t want to be sacrificed. I didn’t want to come out. I didn’t want anyone to know. Because I knew how freaked out people would be and how much of a living hell they would make my life. Oh, this was so bad. All I wanted was to serve out my sentence, leave this town, and never look back.

  Without turning around, I stopped dead in my tracks. The two or three seconds that passed after the jerk’s question seemed to go on for several hours. Since the last twenty-four hours had been filled with surprises, I guess I shouldn’t have been surprised to get one more.

  “Joey!” I heard Bill say in a loud voice. “What the hell, dude? Why you calling somebody ‘faggot’? Don’t you know how much hurt that can cause? Don’t you watch the news? Don’t you know anything? You don’t call people ‘faggot’! And besides, how do you know someone’s sexual orientation? Have you been having sex with them so that you have first-hand information? If not, then it’s just a rumor, and you’re spreading rumors like some gossiping schoolgirl. I don’t pay attention to rumors and you shouldn’t either.”