Hoping for Love (McCarthys of Gansett Island, Book 5)

by Marie Force

  “You know, it’s funny, I keep telling myself that, but it doesn’t seem to matter.”

  “You’re really staying?”

  “I’m really staying.”

  “Because of me?”

  “No, because of Evan. He needs constant supervision.” Owen cuffed her chin. “Yes, because of you, silly. Someone has to pick you up off the floor every morning. It may as well be me.”

  “Oh.”

  “Is that okay?”

  “You really don’t have to…”

  Burying his fingers in her soft blonde hair, he pressed his lips to her forehead. “I want to, Laura. I really want to.”

  “I can’t.”

  “What can’t you do, honey?”

  “I can’t allow myself to depend on you.”

  “Why not?”

  “Because this isn’t the life you want. You don’t want to be settled and domesticated, and I’d never ask you to change for me. You’d hate me for it someday.”

  “First of all, I could never hate you. And second of all, you’re not asking me for anything. All I know is I can’t go off and leave you here all by yourself. I don’t want to go off and leave you here.”

  “How long will it be before you’re itching to get out of here, before the open road beckons and you feel trapped by responsibilities that shouldn’t even be yours?”

  As much as he wanted to argue otherwise, she made good points. “I have an idea.”

  “I’m listening.”

  “Let’s spend this winter together. I’ll stay until the baby is born, and then we’ll see what’s what. How does that sound?”

  “It sounds like just long enough to ensure that I’m completely attached to you and unable to imagine a single day without you in it.”

  Which was exactly what he wanted, he realized with sudden clarity. “The idea of being domesticated no longer horrifies me.”

  She laughed, which he’d hoped she would. “That’s something, I guess.”

  “Give me a chance, Laura. That’s all I’m asking for. You have to know I’d never hurt you.”

  “You’d never hurt me on purpose.”

  “All I know is being where you are is way more appealing than being anywhere else.”

  “I don’t know that I’ve ever received a nicer compliment,” she said, smiling warmly at him.

  That smile filled him with a kind of joy he’d never experienced before.

  “I’ve been wanting to do this for the longest time.” She reached out to bring order to his unruly hair. Rolling her bottom lip between her teeth, she was the picture of concentration. “There,” she said when she was satisfied. “All better.” She dropped her gaze to meet his.

  He’d promised her he wouldn’t kiss her again, but hadn’t they just brokered a tentative agreement to give this thing a whirl? “Laura…”

  “Yes?”

  “I really want to… That is, would it be okay if…”

  She put him out of his misery by drawing him down to her and pressing her lips to his in a sweet, chaste kiss that affected him more profoundly than any kiss ever had. When she started to pull back from him, he stopped her with a hand on the back of her head.

  “Do it again.”

  With her hand on his cheek, she kissed him again. This time, her lips parted, ever so slightly, and her tongue skimmed over his bottom lip. Nothing in his entire life had ever been more erotic or electrifying.

  “If being domesticated means more of that, I think I’m going to like it,” he said, smiling at the shell-shocked look on her face. His own expression had to mirror hers, because he felt as shell-shocked as she looked. “Do we have a deal, Princess? We’ll give it the winter and see where we stand?”

  She took his hand and brought it to her lips, placing a soft kiss on the back. “We have a deal.”

  Grace watched the clock edge closer to noon. “I have to check out soon.”

  Evan released her, turned over and reached for the bedside phone. “Hi, there. I’m in room 320, and I’m wondering if I can reserve it for another night.”

  “Evan! I’m leaving at five!”

  “It’s available? Great. I’m going to use a different credit card for tonight, so I’ll bring that down later.” After a pause, he added, “You can tell housekeeping we’re all set. Thanks.” He hung up the phone and turned back to her.

  “What’re you doing? It’s crazy to waste your money—”

  He shut her up with a kiss that cleared her brain of every thought that wasn’t about him. “It’s not a waste if it buys me four more hours right here,” he said, kissing his way to her breasts.

  “Evan… This is depraved. We can’t keep doing…” His mouth closed over the tender tip of her breast, and all she could think about was the exquisite feel of his lips and tongue on her sensitive flesh.

  “You still haven’t answered my question,” he said as his tongue made circles around her nipple, denying her more.

  “I can’t think when you’re doing that.”

  He stopped what he was doing, lifted his head to make eye contact and raised a brow in question.

  “You know I want you. Why do you need me to say it?”

  “Because it’d be nice to know we’re on the same page here.”

  “Haven’t we been on the same page all morning?” she asked with a smile, hoping to diffuse some of the tension.

  Shifting onto his back, he stared up at the ceiling.

  Grace put her hand on his chest. “Evan—”

  His cell phone rang, breaking the uneasy silence. “Sorry,” he said as he got up, “I’ve got to take this with everything that’s going on.”

  “Go ahead.”

  “Oh, it’s Grant. Hey, bro, what’s up?” Evan listened for a minute and then turned to look at Grace. “Let me ask her.” Holding his hand over the phone, he said, “Stephanie’s new lawyer, Dan Torrington, managed to get the hearing for her stepfather’s case moved up to Wednesday. They need to get a car off the island ASAP so they can spend tomorrow with Dan going over her testimony, but the ferries are booked for the rest of the day. Is there any chance—”

  “Yes! She can have my spot. Of course she can.”

  “They can get you on the eight o’clock boat in the morning, so you’d only be a little late for work.”

  “It’s fine. Tell her I said no problem and good luck.”

  “Thanks, Grace.”

  While Evan worked out the particulars with his brother, Grace thought about Stephanie and how excited and nervous she must be. Her mind also raced with the implications of another night with Evan. By the time she left, she’d be completely in love with him, a thought that would’ve terrified her before the morning they’d spent together.

  In the last few hours, she’d gotten a good glimpse at the man Stephanie had told her might be inside the overgrown boy. While she was thrilled to have more time to spend with the man, she was worried about whether the boy would return and ruin everything.

  “How about a shower?” he asked when he’d stashed the phone in his shorts pocket.

  “Go ahead.”

  “I meant together.”

  “Oh.”

  His face lifted into a sexy half smile as he held out a hand, inviting her to join him. Despite the intimacy they’d shared, it still took an act of courage for her to throw back the sheet, get out of bed and walk across the room naked.

  He watched her every move, his eyes heating with desire as she came toward him. “Go start the water,” he said. “I’ll be right there.”

  When he joined her, he placed a condom on the soap dish.

  Grace’s belly took a dip when she tried to picture how sex in the shower would work.

  “Don’t go all tense on me,” he said as his lips skimmed her neck and shoulder from behind. As the warm water created a blanket of steam around them, he cupped her breasts and teased her nipples with talented fingers while his erection found a home in the cleft of her ass. He reached for the bar of soap, lathered up
his hands and ran them all over her until her legs quivered and threatened to give out from under her.

  “Let me turn around so I can touch you,” she said.

  He stepped back and handed her the soap.

  She started with his shoulders, continued with his chest and belly, playing with his nipples before venturing to his rigid cock. With soapy hands, she explored his shaft and balls, loving the way his head fell back in utter abandon.

  Thinking of what he’d done to her earlier, she dropped to her knees and let the water rinse him clean before she tentatively ran her tongue over the tip. She stroked and licked, marveling how he got even harder.

  “Grace…”

  “Hmm?”

  “Stop teasing,” he growled.

  Laughing, she took him into her mouth, lashing him with her tongue and stroking him the way he’d shown her. If his tortured groan was any indication, Evan seemed to like that. He also liked when she sucked on him.

  “Shit,” he muttered. “Stop. Grace, stop.” He helped her up and crushed his mouth to hers, plundering her mouth with his tongue as his fingers dug into her hips.

  “Did I do it right?” she asked when he shifted his focus to her neck.

  “If you did it any better, you would’ve finished me off.”

  “I’d like to do that sometime.”

  “Finish me off?”

  As she nodded, her face heated with mortification. “In my mouth.”

  “Christ, Grace, when you say things like that, it’s the hottest thing ever.”

  “Why?”

  “Because I know you’ve never said it to anyone else, and I like that. I like it a lot.” He kissed her softly and reached for the condom. “This way.” Turning her so her back was once again to him, he said, “Put your hands on the wall and trust me. I’ve got you, babe.”

  When he put his arm around her waist and slid into her from behind, Grace couldn’t stop the cry that slipped through her parted lips.

  He kept up a slow but steady pace that had her quickly on the verge of release. And then he let the hand he’d rested on her belly slide down to where they were joined to stroke her into a shattering climax that powered through her with lightning speed.

  His fingers dug into her hips to anchor her for his fierce possession until he too cried out his release. For a long time afterward, he remained inside her as they throbbed with aftershocks. Only when the water started to cool did he finally withdraw and turn her into his embrace.

  “You’re amazing,” he whispered, “and one more night isn’t going to be enough.”

  “For me either.”

  He reached for towels, handed one to her and then led her back to bed when they were dry.

  Grace snuggled into his embrace, using his chest as a pillow. His chest hair was soft against her face as she traced a finger along the path that led to the thicker patch of hair that surrounded his penis.

  “I need to ask you something,” he said.

  Grace was immediately on alert. “Okay.”

  “Last night, Stephanie said something that’s been bugging me.”

  Since there was any number of things Stephanie could’ve said, Grace’s mind whirled with possibilities. “What’s that?”

  “She said that for reasons I couldn’t possibly understand, you were the last person I should’ve snuck out on after having sex. Other than the obvious that it was your first time, what did she mean by that?”

  In the scope of a second, Grace thought of a dozen things she could say but decided to go with the truth. She took his hand and brought it to rest on the faded ridge of scar above her belly button. “Feel that?”

  “Yeah. What about it?”

  “I had what they call lap-band surgery about eighteen months ago. Do you know what that is?”

  “I’ve heard of it, but I can’t say I know the particulars.”

  Grace swallowed hard and forced herself to look at him, wanting to see his reaction. “For most of my life, I was significantly overweight. I tried every diet, and I spent so much time at the gym that the owner said he should give me stock in the company. But nothing worked.”

  Evan’s expression was unreadable as he listened intently.

  “In fact, the muscle made me gain weight rather than lose, which made me nuts. So I decided to take drastic measures and had the surgery. The band is a ring around the upper part of my stomach that makes me feel full with much smaller portions.”

  “Which is why you eat like a bird.”

  “Yes. If I overdo, it can be really unpleasant.”

  “I’m sorry if I made too big a deal out of the way you eat.”

  “It’s okay. You didn’t know.” With her fingers on top of his, she pressed on the port that lay below the scar. “If I feel like I’m eating too much or gaining weight, I go to the doctor and have the band adjusted.”

  “How does that work?”

  “It’s done with a needle to the port under my skin, which doesn’t hurt at all. It’s just a pinch and a pop.” She tried to keep still while he investigated the area. “I want you to know that you’re the first person I’ve let touch it.”

  His eyes widened with surprise. “Really?”

  She nodded.

  “Will you always have the band?”

  “I suppose so, unless something better comes along. I’ve lost a hundred and thirty pounds since the surgery. I’ve got about twenty to go—”

  “No,” he said, startling her with his vehemence. “You don’t need to lose any more. You’re perfect just the way you are.”

  “That’s kind of you to say, but I could stand to lose a bit more.” She ran her fingers over the stubble on his jaw. “You can’t know what it means to me that you find me appealing—stretch marks and all.”

  “Appealing? Jesus, Grace, that’s hardly the word for it. You’re sexy and gorgeous and curvy and beautiful. You’re a freaking goddess.”

  His every word went straight to her heart. “You never would’ve looked at me before I lost the weight.”

  “You don’t know that.”

  “Yes, I do. Guys like you…”

  “Like me? What does that mean?”

  “You’ve spent your whole life looking like a movie star and having your pick of women. You would’ve looked right past me before.”

  “I like to think you’re wrong about that, but I guess we’ll never know.” He ran a hand over her hair, letting it slide through his fingers. “That guy you’d been with when I met you…”

  “Trey the douche bag.”

  He laughed at the description. “You knew him before the surgery?”

  “I’d known him most of my life, which is why it was so hurtful when I realized he was only going out with me because he had a bet with his stupid friend that he could ‘nail the whale.’”

  “What?”

  “That’s what they called me in school—the Whale.”

  “Oh God, Grace. That’s awful.”

  “Yeah, well, kids are awful.” She caught a glimpse of something on his face that looked a lot like guilt. “What? Are you going to tell me now that you were one of those kids?”

  He seemed to be trying to decide what he should say.

  “Evan? What is it?”

  “I was involved in something once that was kind of similar,” he said in a regretful tone. “You know my sister-in-law, Maddie?”

  She’d loved meeting Mac, Maddie and their children at Abby’s party. “What about her?”

  “She developed really early, and all the boys were fascinated with her…attributes. This one guy I was friends with, Darren Tabor, he’d been trying to cop a feel for months, but she wouldn’t let him anywhere near her. He finally got pissed and made up a story that Maddie had fooled around with the lot of us at the beach one night. He started calling her Maddie Mattress, and the name took off like wildfire.”

  Grace stared at him, astounded. “Tell me you didn’t go along with that.”

  “I’m deeply ashamed to say that I
allowed peer pressure to get the best of me.”

  “Oh, Evan… That’s awful! What you guys did to her…”

  “We did a terrible thing. I had no idea just how terrible until Mac started dating her and cued me in that until she got together with him, she’d had sex twice in her life and managed to get pregnant with Thomas one of those times. People in town had branded her a slut, and it was all because of a teenage prank gone wrong. He made everyone involved write letters to the Gansett Gazette, confessing that we made it all up.”

  “Good for him.”

  “I want you to know I was ashamed over the whole thing long before Mac ever called me out on it.”

  “I should hope so. You guys nearly succeeded in ruining her life.”

  “Believe me, I know that, and I hate that I was a part of it.” He reached for her hand and linked their fingers. “Have I totally ruined any good feelings you might’ve had for me by telling you this?”

  Grace studied his earnest face. “You didn’t have to tell me. That counts for something.”

  “In light of all you’ve been through, I wouldn’t want you to hear about it from someone else. That would’ve been worse.”

  “Yes, it would’ve.”

  “I’m not that guy anymore, Grace. I swear to you. I learned from that incident, and I deeply regret having been a part of it in the first place. Having to face my father after he heard about it was one of the low points of my life.”

  “What did he say?”

  Evan blew out a deep breath. “I expected him to rant and yell. Rather, his voice was icily calm when he said, ‘I was disappointed to hear you were part of such a thing. I raised my sons to be better men than that.’”

  Grace winced. “Brutal.”

  “Totally.”

  “Thanks for telling me. It means a lot that you shared that with me, knowing it could’ve changed the way I feel about you.”

  “And how do you feel about me?”

  Laughing, Grace said, “I walked right into that one, didn’t I?”

  He smiled, but his eyes were serious.

  She ran her fingers over the whiskers on his jaw. “I feel so many things where you’re concerned that I don’t know how I’d ever put them into words.”

  “Try.”

  Grace drank in the sight of him, still so handsome in spite of his injury. “I like you a lot, and I want to spend more time with you, but I worry that we may be setting ourselves up for a difficult path. I’m putting down roots here on the island just as your career is taking off.”