Control Freak (Second Shots Book 1)

by Ana Novak

  “If you lived with me, you wouldn’t have to worry about the sink breaking.”

  “What, your pipes don’t spontaneously combust here?”

  “Not since I’ve been here,” he responded, and reached around me for a casserole dish. “If you’re looking for rising temperatures, though, I can probably generate some heat for you.”

  I took a sip of moscato. “Ooh, I love it when you talk nerdy to me.”

  “Just wait till I bust out my video games. It’s sexy as hell.”

  I giggled. “I was actually thinking of watching some of Axel’s videos. You know he runs a YouTube gaming channel, right?”

  “I’ve met the guy twice, sweetheart.”

  “Well, he does. Palafox Gaming. Have you heard of it?”

  “No. But please, tell me more about the guy who was there this morning when I walked in and found you half-dressed and soaking wet.”

  “I was not half-dressed!”

  Shane gave me a look. “It looked like you weren’t even wearing anything under that shirt.”

  “Well, excuse me for not remembering to put on my mumu before I tried to save my apartment from flooding.”

  “If you lived with me you wouldn’t have to worry about flooding. Or mumus.” He paused, considering for a moment. “You wouldn’t have to wear clothes at all if you didn’t want to.”

  “Oh yes, that’ll definitely happen. Especially with your big picture windows over there.”

  “The neighbors might like the show.”

  “I’m sure they’ve seen more than enough of me in the tabloids lately.” On impulse, I turned and kissed him on the cheek. “No one could ever get enough of you, though. I’d pay good money to see you naked in front of a window.”

  He laughed, and the gruffness in his tone melted my insides. “If you lived with me,” I said casually, tracing the granite pattern on the island countertop, “I could see you every day and never have to say goodbye.”

  It was the most serious statement in our conversation so far, and Shane stopped mixing, staring down at the green beans and mushrooms like they were the most fascinating thing in the world. Suddenly hesitant, I turned back to the potatoes and resumed mashing. “Of course, you’d have to deal with all my girly stuff,” I continued, keeping my voice playful. “Makeup on the vanity, cords everywhere. It’s pretty much hell on earth for a bachelor. Maybe you should keep this place as a retreat for when it gets to be too much.”

  “Or you could just move here and have your own bathroom,” he said, still not moving.

  “I guess that might work better.” From the corner of my eye, I saw him turn to face me. My heart was in my throat, but I kept mashing and tried to breathe.

  “Are we still joking here?” he asked quietly, not moving any closer.

  If the potatoes had had voices, they would have been screaming in agony from how brutally I was crushing them. “I don’t know,” I said.

  “You said you wanted friends with benefits. No strings attached.”

  “I know.”

  “Is something different now?”

  Yes, I wanted to say. I’m in love with you. But I’m so scared. “You tell me.”

  “I didn’t make the rules.”

  I dropped the masher and propped my hands on my hips, trying like hell not to either hyperventilate or start babbling. “I don’t know, Shane. I know what I feel, but I don’t know what you feel- or-” My voice cracked. “Or what you don’t feel.”

  “You said I had two options. Friends or fuck buddies.”

  “Did I say that?” I turned to face him, looking up at his perfect face, remembering all over again that he was gorgeous like it was the first time I’d seen him, falling into his dark, dark eyes for the first and the thousandth time.

  He was silent, waiting for me to respond, and I sighed. “I did say that,” I admitted. My hand was tracing patterns on the granite again. “I don’t want to get hurt again. You know how it is, you give yourself to someone and when they betray you, it damages you. Dave…he…he really damaged me.” It was the first time I’d admitted it, even to myself. I’d spent the last several years acting so flippant about the demise of my marriage, like it hadn’t really mattered to me, but the pain had changed me, and I hadn’t properly dealt with it until I’d been able to tell Dave my true feelings.

  Shane moved closer to me, his hands coming up to frame my face. “I love you.”

  His words hit me like a freight train, and I raised my eyes to him, suddenly forgetting how to breathe. He looked so good standing there, solid, strong, and more like home than I’d ever thought possible.

  Shane shook his head, a wry smile on his face. “I know it’s fucking crazy, you just moved back, but I was dead in the water when I saw you on that street corner two years ago. When you left, I couldn’t stop thinking about you. Hell, I chased you down outside that cafe just to get you to talk to me again.” One hand slipped down to my shoulder while he used the other one to cup my jaw, his thumb stroking my cheek. “I love you, Taylor. Wherever you are, I’m there. I walked away once, I’m not making that mistake twice.”

  I opened my mouth to respond, but the words stuck in my throat. Instead, I stood on tiptoe and pressed my lips to his, sliding my hands up and wrapping my arms around his neck. His hands dropped to rest on my waist and pull me closer.

  I kissed him with everything I had, feeling the familiar intense wave of desire and need. I swayed on my feet, and his hands tightened on my waist, holding me steady, kissing me back until I was shaking against him.

  “Tell me you love me,” he said against my mouth, breathless. “I need to hear it.”

  “I love you,” I whispered. “I love you, I love you, I love you. Kiss me again.”

  He did.

  Chapter 17

  Van’s blue eyes were solemn as he looked at me. “Are you ready for this?” he asked, and the concern in his voice soothed my anxiety a little.

  “Is Dad going to be here?” I asked. Van had planned to talk to Arnold and explain our plan.

  A wrinkle appeared between Van’s eyebrows, and he shook his head. “I don’t know. He took it pretty hard.”

  My heart sank. I’d spoken with my mom the night before, and her only concern had been whether or not I could handle the inevitable publicity. I’d known my father wouldn’t be nearly as supportive, but I’d hoped he would at least understand why we needed to do this.

  “It’s going to be fine,” Mel spoke up. “We’re all here for you.”

  I smiled hesitantly, and glanced over at her. She was sitting beside Van in the limo, her hands clasped in his. She nodded, her curls bouncing against her perfectly contoured cheekbones. “You’ve got this, girl.”

  Finally I looked at Shane, lounging beside me like he didn’t have a care in the world. His arm was resting across the seat behind my shoulders, and he looked effortlessly handsome in jeans, boots, and a black leather jacket. He said nothing, but his gaze was steady when he met my eyes.

  “I’m ready,” I said.

  Van signaled to the driver, and the limo pulled forward into line.

  “There’s an actual red carpet,” I said, looking out the window. “Am I underdressed?”

  “It’s a label party, not the Oscars,” Mel answered. “You look amazing.”

  We were at the label’s Black Friday Bash, the fifty year anniversary of the company’s founding. Van had been tapped for a couple of songs, but Shane wasn’t planning on performing. Not only was this the night that Van would introduce me publicly as his sister, but it was my first official appearance with Shane as a couple. My heart was pounding so hard I thought it might burst right out of my chest.

  Mel had dragged me back to Edward this morning, and he’d pulled together an outfit that had made me feel like maybe I wouldn’t be completely out of place schmoozing with rockstars. I wore a simple white blouse with flowing black pants. The fit of the clothing was modest, but strategically placed cutouts elevated the ensemble to cutting edge t
rendy.

  The first thing Shane had done was trace his hand down my bare back. “How am I supposed to keep my hands off you?” he’d whispered in my ear, making me blush.

  The limo pulled up to the red carpet, and the attendant opened the door. Van went out first, holding his hand out to Mel, who was looking gorgeous as ever in a silver jumpsuit. When she emerged from the car, the crowd outside burst into cheers and immediately began chanting, “Kiss! Kiss! Kiss!”

  Shane touched my hand, and I looked up at him nervously. He smiled, fingers linking with mine. “I’d kiss you,” he said, “but I don’t want to ruin your makeup.”

  “I don’t think this shade of lipstick would fit you,” I replied, bizarrely relieved that we could both joke at a time like this.

  His eyes were searching mine. “You know it’s gonna be fine,” he said.

  I knew exactly what was going to happen. We’d talked through it last night and then again today with Van, who was supportive of my decision to go public with Shane, if not exactly overjoyed about it. Photographers would shout rapid-fire demands at us, but all I needed to do was smile and pose. Inside, Van, Shane, and Mel would take care of any questions. One of them would be by my side all night, especially once Van and I made our big announcement.

  “And afterwards,” Van had told me, using the big brother voice that I’d heard only a few times before, “You’re not going to care what they write about you. You’re not going to listen to the tabloids or read the online gossip sites. What did I tell you?”

  “We know the truth,” I’d recited weakly, not really believing it myself. “No more hiding.”

  “It’s going to be fine,” I said now, trying to inject as much conviction into my words as possible. The reality was, however, that I was feeling much less courageous than I had when I’d agreed to this plan.

  Shane gave me a quick smile and exited the limo. If possible, the roar of the crowd grew even louder. He reached in for me, and I took a deep breath before accepting his hand. When I stepped out of the limo, I was immediately blinded by camera flashes, and a deafening cacophony of screams rang out from the crowd as they realized who Shane’s date was.

  Shane slid an arm around my waist and said something, but I couldn’t hear him well enough to understand. He guided me up the carpet to our first photo mark. I struck the pose Mel had coached me on, putting one hand on my hip, arching my back, and pointing the toes of my right foot at the carpet so that my knee was bent. Shane stood beside me, his hand firmly on my lower back. His touch was warm, but the chilly November air was like ice against my bare skin.

  People were screaming out questions around me, so quickly that I couldn’t catch most of them.

  “Taylor, are you two exclusive?”

  “How long have you been together?”

  “When are you gonna make it official?”

  “Shane, do I hear wedding bells?”

  Out of everything I heard, there was nothing negative, and that came as the biggest shock of all. I remained silent, and soon Shane was guiding me towards our next mark. At one point he acquiesced and stepped back when a photographer asked for a solo picture of me, and I did my best to maintain my pose, missing his closeness already.

  Finally we were inside, and the first person I saw was Axel, who looked even more winsome than usual in a suit jacket with dark jeans.

  “What are you doing here?” I exclaimed, hugging him. “I didn’t know you were coming!”

  “Ask your boyfriend,” Axel said, and nodded at Shane, who had conveniently struck up a conversation with Van when I’d stepped away. “He called me this morning and said he wanted to thank me for helping you out yesterday.” Axel turned, motioning to the slim dark-haired woman who had been standing behind him. “Taylor, this is my friend, Alexandra Kristiansen. I spent Thanksgiving with her.”

  “Axel’s told me so much about you,” she said, opening her arms for a hug. “I feel like I know you already.”

  “Oh.” I was surprised at the hug, but she seemed warm and genuine, and her wide smile was infectious. “You’re a lucky girl,” I said when she pulled back, remembering what Axel had said to Shane that day at the farmer’s market. “He’s a real catch.”

  Axel burst out laughing, obviously getting my joke. “We really are just friends,” he told me. “We met in second grade.”

  “Right,” I said. “Just like Shane and I are friends.”

  “Not if I have anything to say about it,” Shane said, coming up behind me and sliding his arm around my waist again. He shook Axel’s hand. “Good to see you here, man.”

  “Thanks for the invite,” Axel responded, and introduced Shane to Alexandra, who was suddenly and obviously on the verge of a meltdown at seeing Shane Kruger, but managed to keep her cool when he kissed her on the cheek.

  “Axel and Alexandra,” Shane said, grinning down at me. “That sounds like a buddy heist movie waiting to happen.”

  “Or a super catchy pop song,” I said.

  “Or a bestselling romance novel,” Axel added. “Better get on that, Taylor.”

  “I don’t do romance,” I said, wrinkling my nose. “I’m no good at happy endings.”

  “I hope that’s not the case,” Shane said, “or I’m out of luck.”

  “You are my happy ending,” I told him sweetly, and he kissed my nose before turning back to Axel.

  “We’d better get going. Cos is first up for the performances,” he said, tilting his head toward Van.

  “It was wonderful meeting you!” Alexandra exclaimed. She was clutching so tightly at Axel’s arm that he was wincing.

  “See you later,” I said to Axel, and he waved me off, trying to pry Alexandra’s death grip off his bicep.

  The crowd was huge, with bartenders slinging drinks in every corner and people milling around in between. The stage was a small circular platform in the middle of the ballroom, set beneath a dramatic chandelier that sparkled in the low lights. Even though I was trying to control my breathing, my chest felt constricted. The feeling only worsened when Shane pulled me into the small side room where Van was already waiting. The sound people swamped me immediately, getting me set up with my earset. By the time they were done and had cleared me to go onstage, I felt like I’d run a marathon.

  Trying to stay calm, I ran through a few warm-up scales, but my voice kept cracking.

  “I think I’m going to pass out,” I said, putting a hand to my chest. “I don’t know if I can do this.”

  “What, the singing or the socializing?” Van asked from where he was sitting, tuning his guitar.

  “The singing. I don’t know what I was thinking, Van. I can’t sing in front of all these people. I must have been out of my mind!” I was frantically fanning myself.

  “You can’t back out now,” Van said. “Dad already told me he didn’t think you would go through with it.”

  My brother knew exactly how to push my buttons. “Oh god, you suck.”

  “You’ll be fine,” Shane said soothingly. He caught my hands in his, rubbing his thumbs along my palms. “They’re going to love you.”

  “You’ve never even heard me sing,” I complained. “I could be completely tone deaf.”

  “She’s not,” Mel cut in. “And he’s right, Taylor. You’ll do just fine, and you’ll give them something to talk about that doesn’t involve your dad’s affairs. Now suck it up. They’re about to introduce Van.”

  It had all been so hush-hush that only a small handful of Van’s team even know I would be performing with him that night. He’d even done a dress rehearsal completely on his own to avoid any press leaks. He’d gone to a lot of effort to make this happen, and here I was, freaking out moments before it was supposed to happen. I kept my mouth shut and nodded, not trusting myself to speak. Out in the ballroom, the emcee was starting to speak.

  “You remember what I told you, right?” Van asked. He stood, handing the guitar off to a sound tech, and put his hands on my shoulders. “I’ll sing Drago by myse
lf, then I’ll introduce you and you’ll sing Scorched by Her Touch.”

  “His Touch,” I corrected him automatically, and he smiled.

  “That’s right. The original lyrics. You get to sing the song you wrote, kid. That’s a pretty big deal.” Van didn’t break eye contact, looking more serious than I could ever remember seeing him. “This is it. No more hiding.”

  “No more hiding,” I echoed, and when he squeezed my shoulder, I remembered again why I’d wanted to do this in the first place. The tabloids had gained a lot of traction using my relationships with Shane and Van to label me as a homewrecker. Shane and I had already started chipping away at that image by taking our relationship public, and now Van was about to do his part to end the speculation. All he wanted in return was for us to perform together, just like he’d always wanted us to.

  “I love you,” I said to my brother, and I saw the shine to his eyes before he pulled me close. I hugged him back as tightly as I could.

  The moment ended when I heard the emcee saying Van’s name. “Showtime,” I said shakily as I pulled back.

  With one last meaningful look, Van took Mel’s hand and left the room to thunderous applause, and Shane and I were alone.

  “Last moments of a normal life,” Shane said, leaning back against the door and folding his arms across his chest. He had that crooked, arrogant smirk on his face again, and I couldn’t help but smile back.

  “My life hasn’t been normal since I met you,” I said, and stood on my tiptoes to kiss his cheek. “Thanks for being here tonight. I don’t think I could do this without you.” Outside, Van began singing, and I cleared my throat, looking down at my feet.

  "Hey.” Shane put his hands on either side of my neck, using his thumbs to stroke my jawline and tilt my head up to look at him. “I’m not going anywhere.”