Ashes & Embers Series Collection (Books 1 to 4)

by Carian Cole

  Our lips meet again, our hands slowly exploring each other with gentle caresses, our bodies moving in a drowsy rhythm. Winding my hair in his hand, he gently pulls my head back and kisses my neck, moving his lips down to kiss the sensitive flesh between my breasts, his fingers grazing over the edge of my new black lace bra. His soft, slow touches and kisses are exactly what I need and want, and somehow he knows this. My eyes flutter closed, and I let myself relax into his touch, bowing my head down to kiss the top of his head as his lips and tongue roam my chest. His hair is soft and silky against my lips, and smells of sage. He is so easy to get lost in. He ignites all of my senses, awakens all my desires, and calms my fears and insecurities. He is quickly finding his way into my heart.

  He drags his tongue up over my throat and back to my lips, making me shiver.

  “Are you cold?” he asks, pulling the blanket up.

  I shake my head. “No . . . not at all. You’re just making me all shivery again. The way you kiss . . . Lukas, I have no words.”

  He sucks in a breath and touches my cheek. “Can you stay with me tonight? Do you have to go home?”

  Oh, God. I don’t want to leave the cozy warmth of his arms, or break the closeness that’s growing between us. I’m afraid it will stop and never come back again, and I don’t want this moment to end. Ever. Tommy is with Paul, but Macy is home alone, and I told her I would be home. Yes, I could call her and tell her I won’t be coming home tonight, but what will she think? She knows I had a date with someone new tonight. How will that make me look as a mother if I don’t come home? I don’t want my kids thinking both their parents have just started hooking up with random people. And if I did stay . . . am I ready for this to go further?

  No. I’m not. Not yet.

  “I can’t,” I finally say. “I’m sorry. Macy is alone, and I told her I’d be home. I know she’s almost eighteen, but I’ve never stayed away from home over night before, and she knows I had a date tonight and I don’t-”

  “Shhh . . .” He touches my lips with his finger and smiles at me. “I understand, Ivy. I know there’s a lot of new going on here for you. And your kids.”

  “I’m sorry . . .” I feel like the immature one here, having to run home all the time, shying away from sex.

  “Don’t be sorry. I can be patient.” He takes a deep breath and exhales. “Will you keep seeing me?”

  “Yes, I want to see you again.”

  A big smile lights up his face, and it’s contagious. “You’re really cute when you smile,” I admit, tracing my finger over the tattoo on his chest.

  “You’re pretty cute yourself. So . . . can we go steady? Is that the term you use?”

  I smack his arm and gape at him. “Lukas! I’m not from the fifties! Jesus!”

  Laughing, he hugs me closer to him, his big arms circling me. “Well, how the fuck do I know how to say this right?”

  “Well, what are you trying to say exactly?”

  “I’m trying to say I want you to be my girlfriend, and I think I’m failing miserably.”

  My heart soars from cuteness overload. How could I say no to such sexy adorableness? It would be seriously impossible.

  I reach up and push his hair out of his eyes. “You’re not failing at all, Lukas. I don’t think you could fail at anything.”

  “So, is that a yes?”

  With a big smile and my heart beating faster, I lean forward and kiss his lips. “It’s a yes.”

  CHAPTER 13

  LUKAS

  MY FIRST DATE with Ivy could not have been more perfect. Dinner came out great, she looked beautiful, Ray kept his beak shut, and kissing her under the blanket—with the stars above us—was simply exquisite. I didn’t want the night to ever end. If I close my eyes, I can still taste her on my lips and feel her soft skin pressed against mine.

  That was over a week ago, and I haven’t seen her since.

  I practically begged to see her for Christmas, but family obligations kept her from me, which I totally respect and understand. But I wish I was part of her family and not an outsider. Maybe someday that’ll happen.

  A couple hundred text messages and a few phone calls later, I’m on my way to pick her up to take her to see the band play tonight. I feel weird when I pull into her driveway, sorta wishing I let her come to my place like she wanted to, but I insisted on picking her up here. It feels fucked up, though, ringing the doorbell of the house she lived in with her husband. After a few seconds, she opens the door and comes out on the front steps but doesn’t invite me inside, which probably would have been really uncomfortable. Instead, she throws her arms around my neck, clinging to me.

  “I really missed you,” she murmurs. Fuck, less than five seconds, and she’s already got my brain going gushy.

  I hug her close to me and lift her off her feet, making her laugh and hang on to me tighter. “I missed you, too. I was starting to think you were gonna friend-zone me.” I set her down on her feet and study her face, afraid to see some kind of change in her, but I don’t. Her eyes are still sparkling at me, just like they were when we said good-bye over a week ago.

  “No, Lukas, I’m not friend-zoning you, silly. I’m sorry I couldn’t see you for Christmas. I wanted to, really, but I just needed to focus on the kids and keep their routine normal.”

  I take her hands in mine. “I understand. You’re a great mom, and I love that about you.”

  We walk to my car, and I open the passenger door for her, then go around and get in behind the wheel. Leaning across the console, I turn her face to mine and kiss her lips, and she makes a little startled sound, fueling me to want more of her. I pull her over to me until she’s half lying on my chest, her body stretched across the console, and kiss her deeper, my tongue searching out hers.

  She pulls away. “This car is really small,” she jokes. “Not really conducive to making out in the front seat.”

  “I don’t care. I’m dying to kiss you.” I cup the back of her neck and pull her back to my lips, wishing we didn’t have to go to the club so I could just take her home with me. Right now, I’d love nothing more than to stretch her out on my bed and explore every inch of her until she’s crazy stupid for me.

  “I’ve been thinking about your kisses a lot,” she says, her voice small and sweet. She may be older than me, but truthfully, she’s so cute and shy that she seems younger than she is. I don’t think she sees that in herself, but I do.

  “Oh yeah? What have you been thinking?” I nip her bottom lip and let my hand slide over her jeans to rest on her ass.

  “How good you make me feel.” Even in the dimness of the car, I can still see her aqua eyes shining at me, and the glint of her lips, moist from my kiss.

  “I want to make you feel things you’ve never felt before, Ivy.”

  She closes her eyes, as if she’s taking my words into her to keep, then slowly opens her eyes again. “You already have,” she whispers, then presses her lips to my cheek.

  Sighing, I help her back over to the passenger seat. “We should go, or we’ll be late,” I say. “Although, I kinda just want to stay here and be alone with you.”

  “I do, too, but I really want to see the band. I’ve been looking forward to this since you told me about them. We can be alone after. Macy is staying at a friend’s house tonight.” She smiles shyly over at me, and I think I know what she’s hinting at. What she doesn’t know is that, in a little while, she’s gonna see me on stage with the band, and I hope to hell it doesn’t change her mind about me.

  The club is crowded, and there’s a line at the door, so I text Vandal to meet us at the back door to let us in.

  “Well, well, well . . . you finally found someone I haven’t had the pleasure of,” he says, checking out Ivy, his eyes roaming all over her. I know he’s doing it just to get me riled up, but I ignore his stupid shit because I’m in too good of a mood tonight to let him ruin it.

  “Ivy, this is my brother, Vandal. Van, this is Ivy.”

  Ivy looks p
etrified of him, which is a typical reaction for most women. First, they look scared, but then they become oddly attracted to him. I’ve watched it happen more times than I can count. Vandal is a big guy at six-foot four, with a muscular build like a wrestler. He has long black hair almost down to his friggen’ ass, dark skin, and lots of tats. We do look alike in some ways, but he’s bigger than I am and always has a menacing look on his face.

  “It’s nice to meet you,” she says politely. I put my arm around her, and she presses her body into mine, fitting against me like she was made from a part of me.

  Vandal actually smiles at her, something he doesn’t do often. “The pleasure’s mine, sweetheart. Hope you enjoy the show.”

  I pull her away from him before he blurts out anything annoying or inappropriate, and lead her down the hall to the door that will take us into the club.

  “Wow, he’s a big guy,” Ivy says when we’re away from him. “He looks Native American.”

  “Yeah . . . we have different mothers.”

  “You mentioned a niece . . . Is she his?”

  Nodding, I find our reserved table by the stage. “Yeah, Katie is his. He’s a good dad. I’ll give him that. Her mother’s a crazy bitch, though.” I help her get her coat off, and hang it over the back of her chair before we sit together. “Katie’s just a little younger than your son. Maybe next time I babysit her, we could let them meet?”

  I know she’s nervous about me meeting her kids, but if we’re going to continue dating, she’s going to have to let them meet me and get to know me at some point. I don’t want to be treated like a dirty secret. She doesn’t know me well enough yet to understand how important it is for me to be part of a family . . . and to have my own family. If her kids end up hating me, I’m not sure how I’m gonna deal with that.

  “Okay,” she promises. “That would be fun. Macy is really good with kids. She’ll probably love your niece.”

  I lean into her neck and kiss her ear. “You look gorgeous tonight.” She’s got on a black lacy jacket over a red silk top, skinny jeans, and black leather boots. Her hair is straightened tonight, different from her usual loose waves, and it looks even longer, almost reaching her waist. I’d love to draw her naked, with just her hair flowing over her body, and frame it for my bedroom. I file that wish away with the rest of the things I want to do with her.

  She beams at my compliment. “You’re lookin’ good, too . . . I have to tell you, the shoes kinda really get to me,” she admits, her lips curving into a sensual smile.

  “I’ll never take them off, then.” We’re interrupted by a crowd of three people just as I’m about to kiss her. I look up to see two chicks and a guy standing by our table.

  “Hey, I’m Lukas. You guys must be Evelyn, Mike, and Amy?” I stand up, and the shorter girl nods, her eyes darting around nervously, like she’s looking for someone or hoping not to be seen. I can see why Storm likes her, though; she’s cute and has huge round, expressive eyes like a baby owl.

  “That’s us. You’re Storm’s cousin?”

  “Yup. This is Ivy.”

  After introductions, we sit and I watch Evie’s boyfriend scout out every hot chick in the place, while Evie talks to her friend and Ivy. Storm’s right; the boyfriend’s a douche and obviously a whore-hound. He could at least attempt to hide it. Dumbass. Storm shows up at our table to say hello, and I can’t tell who’s more in love with him—Evie or her boyfriend. He’s fan-boying over Storm so bad that he’s oblivious to the fact that Storm’s got his hand on his chick’s neck and is whispering in her ear, making her blush. Ivy raises her eyes at me as we witness the train wreck going on in front of us, and I just shake my head. How Storm is gonna unravel this mess is beyond me, but I hope he does, for his sake. I’m one of the few people who know he still has nightmares from losing his first wife years ago to suicide, an evil our family seems to be plagued with. I glance at my own inked wrists, and I can still see the raised scar tissue there. I wonder how long it will be before Ivy notices them and questions me.

  For some, body art is to display things we’re passionate about. For others, it’s a camouflage to hide who we really are inside.

  CHAPTER 14

  IVY

  IT’S BEEN years since I’ve been to a concert or seen any kind of live band play, and I didn’t recognize the band name when Lukas asked me to come. Now that I’m looking around, and seeing people milling about wearing the hoodies and t-shirts with the Ashes & Embers logo, I realize that Macy has one of their posters hanging on her wall. She also has several of their t-shirts. Great. Of course, my daughter would be a fan of the band that Lukas is so close to, because her being attracted to the man I’m dating isn’t awkward enough. Now, I’m going to have to deal with her obsessing over the entire band.

  The lights go down, the curtain goes up, and the band starts to play; they’re a plethora of muscle, long hair, tattoos, and sexy voices. Their sound is great, and the crowd is going wild over them. Vandal stands off to the side of the stage, playing bass, and he’s a whole lot of scary with a side of wow. It’s easy to see why Evie is so taken with Storm; he’s hot and playful and absolutely full of personality on stage. The singer looks like Storm but is much more serious, swaying with the mic, his voice deep and emotional, pulling us all in. He could sing the alphabet, and it would be amazing. He’s that good. There’s another guitarist strutting around the stage, banging his head of long dirty blonde hair. He’s shirtless and his ripped, faded jeans are hanging low on his hips, revealing toned abs and that V—the same Lukas has too—that women go crazy for. I can barely see the drummer, but from what I can see, he’s a wild man back there, his hair even longer than the rest of them, tossing his sticks in the air and catching them every time.

  A crowd of women have made their way to the front of the stage and are screaming, grabbing at the guys’ legs, especially Storm’s. I glance over at Evie, wondering if she knows what she’s getting into, getting involved with a rock star. I don’t know if I could deal with women constantly coming on to my man, groping him, offering to do God knows what just to be with him. If Paul was so easily swayed by a younger, sexy girl, how do men react when it’s happening to them on a daily basis? I don’t even want to know.

  Right after the second song, Lukas leans close to me and plants a kiss on my cheek. “I’ll be right back, doll.” I nod and watch him walk over to the side of the stage, talk to a blonde girl, and then disappear down a hallway.

  “How long have you been dating?” Evie asks me.

  “Oh . . . well, we’re not really dating. It’s kinda new. I’m a thirty-six-year-old new divorcee. I met him to get a tattoo done, and we sorta hit it off.”

  “That’s great! He’s really cute.”

  She’s so right, and he seems to get cuter every time I see him. “I guess.” I smile at her. “I don’t know . . . he’s much younger than me. He’s only twenty-four. I have a teen daughter who has a crush on him, and she loves this band. This is all really new for me. I think I’m kinda too old for this.”

  She waves her hand at me, dismissing my comment with a smile. “Get out of here! You don’t look thirty-six! And who cares about age anyway? Storm speaks really highly of him. He’s a good guy. If you’re happy, just go for it! ”

  “Look who’s talking!” Evie’s friend interjects, nudging Evie’s arm.

  I lower my voice, so her boyfriend can’t hear me. “I heard about you and Storm. Lukas told me what happened.”

  “What did you hear?” she asks, her big eyes growing wider with fear.

  “About the blizzard and how he fell for you. Don’t worry. I won’t say anything. Lukas really wants to see Storm happy.”

  Her eyes soften. “I do, too.”

  I look up at the stage as the song ends. The singer grabs the mic off the stand and walks a little closer to the edge of the stage.

  “So, as you guys know, my brother got stuck in a blizzard a few weeks ago, right?” He turns to Storm, laughing in his direction. �
�Like trapped in his truck out in the woods.”

  The crowd screams, and Evie looks like she is going to pass out.

  The singer continues. “So, this chick he was stuck with had no fucking idea who he was. Can you believe that shit?”

  “No!” the audience yells.

  “Fuckin’ A, right! So Storm gave her one of our sweatshirts to wear, because he steals them all and he had one in his truck.” He looks over at Storm, who’s shaking his head and laughing over on his side of the stage. “And she says, ‘oh is this one of those bands that just yell, and you can’t hear the fucking lyrics?’”

  The crowd roars and laughs. Evie’s friend, Amy, laughs hysterically, while Evie sips her drink. I feel bad for her. She looks like she is going to be sick.

  “So we decided to do a song with no fuckin’ yelling, just for Blizzard Chick! And as a special treat, Storm’s gonna sing this one. It’s one of his favorite songs.”

  “Oh, God,” Evie says as the audience jumps up and down.

  Storm’s brother continues. “Now, you all know he can’t sing as good as me, so let’s go easy on him, okay?” He puts the mic back in its stand and walks away as the lights go down.

  Evie’s boyfriend turns to her. “This ought to be good,” he says, with a slight smirk on his face. Honestly, I think he knows that Evie and Storm have something going on, and he just doesn’t care. He has that jerk look to him. Resting jerk face.

  The stage is dark and quiet for a few moments, and then a violin starts to play a few soft notes in the dark. Suddenly, a blue spotlight shines down on one member on the right side of the dark stage, holding the violin, moving the bow softly over the strings, the sound haunting and beautiful.

  It takes me a few stunned moments to realize it’s Lukas glowing under the blue light like an ethereal angel, his eyes closed as he plays the slow intro of the song. He looks incredible up there on stage, and the way his arm muscles flex as he plays is making all the women drool. Including me.