Afraid

by Mandasue Heller

  ‘Jeff, Andrea … you can go in now.’

  Jeff pushed his guilty thoughts to the back of his mind at the sound of Jones’s voice. He stood up and thanked the man, and then turned to Andrea. She hadn’t moved and, when he saw the fear in her eyes, he guessed that she was scared to face Skye because she felt every bit as guilty as he did.

  ‘Come on, love,’ he said softly, holding out his hand. ‘I know it’s hard, but she needs us.’

  EPILOGUE

  Shirley slowed the car down, and then came to a stop when she spotted the number of the aisle they were looking for.

  ‘Is that Skye?’ she asked when she gazed out through the window and saw a young girl kneeling beside a grave halfway along the row.

  Jeff glanced out and said, ‘Yeah, I think so,’ as he reached over to the back seat for the flowers they had bought. ‘Are you ready?’ he asked then, unbuckling his seat belt.

  ‘I think I’d better stay in the car,’ Shirley said. ‘There’s a time and a place, and this isn’t it,’ she added, smiling to let him know that it was okay for him to go without her. ‘I’ll find the car park and wait for you there.’

  Jeff nodded, and leaned over to kiss her. ‘Won’t be long.’

  ‘Take as long as you need,’ Shirley urged, stroking her swollen stomach. ‘This little one will keep me occupied. I swear he must have smuggled a football in there while I wasn’t looking.’

  Jeff winked at her, and then climbed out of the car. The baby hadn’t been planned, but he couldn’t have been more delighted when Shirley had told him that she was pregnant. He’d told Skye and Andrea about it straight away, in order to save them from having to hear it from someone else. But he hadn’t mentioned it since, because he hadn’t wanted them to think he was rubbing their noses in his new-found happiness.

  He and Andrea had been civil to each other since their split, but he knew it hadn’t been easy for her and it was out of respect for her that he hadn’t yet introduced Skye to Shirley. It would have to happen eventually, because she would soon have a little brother or sister. But Shirley was right: this was neither the time nor the place.

  Skye hadn’t heard the car, but she did hear the footsteps. A look of surprise came over her face when she glanced up and saw her dad walking towards her.

  ‘What are you doing here?’ she asked, wiping her hands on her jeans as she stood up to greet him.

  ‘It’s her anniversary,’ said Jeff, nodding towards the other grave a little further down, in which he and Andrea had thought they’d been burying Skye at this time last year. ‘I brought flowers.’ He held up the bunches he was carrying. ‘One for Chloe, and one for Hayley. Although I’m not sure she needs them,’ he said, smiling as he gazed at the flowers already festooning Hayley’s grave.

  ‘She’d be touched that you bothered,’ Skye told him, taking one of the bunches from his hand and squatting down to place them alongside the ones that she herself had brought. ‘Where’s Shirley?’ she asked then, glancing round when she had straightened up.

  ‘She’s waiting in the car,’ Jeff told her. ‘She saw you down here, and didn’t want you to think she was intruding.’

  Skye sighed and gave him a mock-stern look. ‘Dad, this is daft. I wish you’d all stop walking on eggshells around me.’

  ‘It’s not just you I’m thinking about – it’s your mum as well,’ Jeff reminded her.

  ‘You’ve been separated for ages, and she’s fine about it,’ Skye assured him. ‘Anyway,’ she went on, a sly little smile coming onto her lips, ‘she’s got her eye on someone else, so she’s not that bothered about you any more.’

  ‘Really?’ Jeff raised an eyebrow. ‘Who’s the lucky man?’

  ‘That copper mate of yours,’ Skye told him. ‘Although I don’t think he’s realised yet.’

  ‘Who, Jones?’

  ‘Which one’s he? The tall blond one, or the nice-looking dark-haired one.’

  ‘The second.’

  ‘Him, then.’

  ‘Dean?’ Jeff’s eyebrow crept up a bit more. ‘Wow. I’m surprised.’

  ‘I don’t see why.’ Skye laughed. ‘He’s nice, and he looks a bit like you. I think he kind of likes her, as well,’ she said then. ‘’Cos he’s always calling round to see if we’re okay. He makes out like it’s just ’cos of what happened, but I can tell it’s really her he’s come to see. Doubt he’ll ever say anything to her, though, ’cos he probably thinks he’ll be treading on your toes.’

  Jeff gazed at his daughter in wonderment. It had taken months for her to come to terms with her ordeal, and there had been times when he had thought that she would be scarred for ever. But with her mum’s help, and the support of the police and Social Services, she had gradually accepted the truth of the situation and had been going from strength to strength ever since.

  The final piece of the puzzle had fallen into place for her at Jamie Thornton’s trial four months ago. It had dragged on for a couple of weeks, and Skye had bravely insisted on facing her abuser in court rather than give her evidence via a video link. She already knew by then that everything he had told her was a lie, but Jeff knew it had shocked her to learn that the man she had considered her saviour had been contemplating cutting his losses and disposing of her when she became pregnant, and only hadn’t gone through with it because he hadn’t been able to find a suitable replacement. It had also hurt her deeply to learn that he was the one who had been beating her stomach as she slept, in an effort to make her miscarry when the various medicines he’d been forcing her to take for her sickness had failed to do it.

  But as shocked as she had been about all that, and as mortified as she had felt to face the court knowing that they had all seen extracts from the videos of herself and Chloe being raped and abused, Skye had held her head high after giving her evidence and had gone back to court every day afterwards to see out the rest of the trial. She had stared Jamie Thornton in the eye right up until the jury had delivered their verdicts of guilty on all counts, at which point she had calmly got up and walked out, letting her abuser know that she didn’t give a damn how long a sentence the judge gave him.

  Now, as Jeff looked at her, he saw no trace of the frightened, confused little girl she had been back then. Still not yet seventeen years of age, she had blossomed into the most beautiful self-assured young lady, and Jeff couldn’t have been any more proud of her than he was right now.

  ‘So, when am I going to meet her?’ Skye asked, breaking into his thoughts. ‘’Cos there can’t be long left, can there?’

  ‘A couple of months,’ Jeff told her. ‘But you know where we are, and you’re welcome to come round any time you like.’

  ‘I’ll give you a ring when I’ve finished my placement, so we can set something up,’ Skye promised.

  ‘How’s that going?’ Jeff asked. ‘Still enjoying it?’

  ‘It’s great,’ Skye said, smiling as she linked her arm through his and set off towards the other grave. ‘I love being at the salon, and can’t wait till I’m qualified and I can get a full-time job there. But I’ll have to get my exams out of the way first and I’m dreading them.’

  ‘You’ll be fine,’ Jeff assured her. ‘I’ve got every confidence in you.’

  ‘Let’s see if you’re still saying that when I want to cut your hair,’ Skye teased. ‘You’re going to be my first victim after I qualify,’ she warned him. ‘You’ve had it like that for as long as I can remember, and I’m dying to drag you out of the 1980s.’

  ‘Don’t be so cheeky,’ Jeff scolded, grinning. Then, ‘So how’s your mum getting on with Bernie? Is she used to him yet?’

  ‘Not really.’ Skye laughed. ‘She says she likes him, but I think she’s a bit scared of him.’

  ‘Why? He’s not vicious, is he?’

  ‘Is he ’eck,’ Skye scoffed. ‘He’s as soft as anything. I’m glad the police let me keep him ’cos it would have killed me if they’d put him down, poor thing.’

  ‘Well, as long as you’re happy,’
said Jeff, putting his hand over hers and squeezing. ‘That’s all that matters.’

  ‘I am,’ Skye told him, gazing into his eyes as they walked. ‘And you are, too, aren’t you?’

  ‘Yes, love, I am,’ Jeff admitted. ‘I’m sorry it didn’t work out with your mum, but Shirley’s a lovely woman.’

  ‘I’m sure she is,’ said Skye, a twinkle coming into her eye as she added, ‘And your copper mate seems like a lovely man, too. So if you just give him a little nudge in the right direction next time you see him, we’ll all be happy, won’t we?’

  ‘I guess so.’ Jeff grinned. ‘I’ll see what I can do.’

  They had reached Chloe’s grave by now, and a feeling of sadness settled over them both as they gazed down at it. In stark contrast to Hayley’s well-tended, often-visited resting place, the only flowers adorning this one were the same ones that had been placed there in Skye’s honour on the day of the funeral, and they were all long dead and shrivelled.

  ‘God, it’s such a shame,’ Skye murmured wistfully. ‘I can’t believe he killed her like that. She was only a kid. And some of the stuff she told me about what her dad did to her …’ She trailed off and shivered, before saying, ‘She didn’t deserve any of it.’

  Jeff put his arm around her shoulder, and said, ‘I know I shouldn’t say it, but I’m just glad it wasn’t you. It broke my heart when I had to leave you here that day.’

  ‘Do you think she’s at peace now?’ Skye asked, resting her head on his chest.

  ‘Definitely,’ said Jeff. ‘And she’s got Hayley to look after her, hasn’t she?’

  ‘Yeah.’ Skye reached up and touched her angel necklace. Then, sniffing back the tears that were stinging her eyes, she said, ‘Let’s go, Dad. It’s time to move on.’

  Jeff nodded and, taking her hand in his, strolled back along the path with her.