For His Eyes Only

by Lexi Blake

  She wished she could tell Nick’s story, the one about the brave man who’d walked away from his job when he’d realized what he was being used to do. She would have to settle for other brave men.

  Maybe by telling their stories, she could feel close to him, have some connection though there were miles between them.

  Ten minutes later, she stepped out of the shower and went to work drying her hair. She wrapped herself in a robe and hoped dinner would be coming up soon.

  When she was clean and dry and couldn’t stand another second alone with her thoughts, she made her way through the bedroom with its magnificent bed.

  And stopped in her tracks because there was something on her pillow that absolutely shouldn’t be there. Hayley felt her jaw drop at the sight of that box of condoms sitting on her bed. That wasn’t the only thing. There were sex toys laid out on her nightstand. She barely registered those as her anger rose.

  Her nightstand. Not theirs. Ezra had been sleeping on the couch, though he did insist on messing up the other side of the bed so the maids wouldn’t talk.

  She picked up the box of extra-large, ribbed-for-her-pleasure condoms and turned because they were going to have a talk.

  She strode into the room, feeling the heat of anger on her face. “Do you want to explain these? Exactly how are you planning on using these, Mr. Fain? Because if this was a hint…”

  She gasped as she felt an arm go around her waist. Before she could scream, a big hand clapped down over her mouth. Panic flared through her system and she tried to kick back.

  Someone was in her room. Someone had gotten to Ezra because she couldn’t believe that man would hurt her like this. No. He’d opened the door to the wrong person and now she was going to find out the hard way exactly what those men coming after her wanted.

  “Stop fighting me. I rather thought you were aware of the many uses of prophylactics,” a familiar voice said. Deep and dark, that voice went straight to her pussy. “Let me explain. I will roll it over my erection and then I’ll be free to fuck you in any way I wish. I believe you’ll find I have a lot of wishes to fulfill when it comes to you, dushka. But first we’re going to discuss your punishment.”

  She went still in his arms.

  Nick was here. It looked like her trouble was just beginning.

  Chapter Eighteen

  Hayley relaxed and stopped fighting. There was no way she was fighting this man, though she did have some questions. “What are you doing here?”

  His lips were close to her ear, the heat of his words nearly scorching her. “You’re not where I left you, Hayley. I came to collect what belongs to me and to make it clear that you will not run from me again.”

  “Uh, I didn’t run from you in the first place. You were leaving. I had nothing to stay for.”

  “That’s not how I remember it. I remember explaining to you quite plainly that I needed some time to think and that you were to stay safely where I put you.”

  “That is revisionist history,” she shot back.

  “I’ve been told it’s the only way to go. So we’re going to have a long talk, you and I, and you will understand how this will go from now on, but first we should get this out of the way.”

  His hand moved up and suddenly her towel was on the ground, cool air caressing her skin. Her nipples peaked immediately and she tried to cover herself. “What are you doing? I need that back. We’re not alone here. Oh, god. Where’s Ezra?”

  What had he done to Ezra? Nick could get dramatic at times. She blamed it on his Russianness. She had to hope he hadn’t actually killed the CIA agent. She tried to reach for the towel. Nick had it in his hands before she could grab it.

  “Mr. Fain is indisposed,” he said as he tossed the towel away. “Don’t worry about him. We’ve had a nice talk and he understands that I’m going to be your bodyguard from now on. He’s got plenty to think about and he knows you’re safe. I was far more courteous to him than he was to me. I wouldn’t allow him to believe you’re in danger.”

  “Well, why would we call you? You’re the one who told me you were leaving. Aren’t you supposed to be in Moscow by now?”

  “I never left London. I wouldn’t have. I came to my senses after a long night of contemplation, and do you know what I found?”

  Did he think she was a complete idiot? That she would ignore what had happened that night simply because he walked in looking like the most gorgeous man she’d ever seen? Nope. She had some small amount of self-respect. “Probably the bottom of a vodka bottle? Do you think I don’t know where you went? You ran off to the bar with Brody. The bar that happens to be attached to a lifestyle club where all the naked women roam.”

  He stood there in the middle of her suite, his lips curling up in a perfectly infuriating smile. “You sound like an aggrieved wife, dushka. While you look beautiful when you nag at me, I can’t allow you to continue at this moment. We have other things to do. And we do need to talk about when it is appropriate to be naked. Right now is very appropriate. On the beach this afternoon was not.”

  She started to open her mouth because if he thought she was a nag now, he needed to wait and see what she could unleash on him once she had her clothes on. Before she could say a word, he had wrapped a big hand around her wrist and was pulling her forward.

  “Nick, you can’t walk back in my life like this.” She started to tell him that they needed to sit down and talk. He sat down, but the next thing he did made Hayley believe he had little interest in talking.

  He flipped her around and she found herself over his knee. He’d maneuvered her as easily as a doll and showed no sign of strain. Her belly was over his lap, her bare ass up in the air. “I can. I did.”

  His hand caressed her ass and she could feel her whole body begin to light up. Her heart might have missed him but the rest of her had gone into starvation mode, all her sexual instincts drying up the minute he rejected her. She’d felt numb for days, but now the heat between them roared back.

  “Nikolai, you ended our relationship.” She needed to say the words, to remind herself that her head and not her stupid heart or her suddenly active female parts were in charge.

  “I did nothing of the kind.” One hand cupped her ass and the other was at the small of her back, balancing and holding her. “We had a fight and I said things I shouldn’t have said. I said them because I was afraid, not only for you but of you, of loving you. I cleared up the problems with my past. There’s no one coming after me again. You’re safe. I’m safe. Do you understand?”

  He’d done that for her? It was everything she’d asked him to do. “You’re safe?”

  “I’m safe. But more importantly, you’re safe. As for the other, I’m still afraid. But I figured out what I’m afraid of more. Not being with you. Not knowing where you are and who is taking care of you. Not having my arms around you. Be as angry as you like with me, Hayley, but don’t deny us this. Tell me we can play.”

  Play? He wanted to play? Such a silly word. Being intimate with Nick didn’t feel like play. It felt serious, but then that was how he would put it. He would frame it in his own language. Play was serious for Nick. The fact that he was here and not in Russia was serious for Nick.

  But could she trust it?

  For now it didn’t matter because she wanted him too badly. She had a chance to get her hands on him again and she wasn’t going to miss it. If she was going to leave at the end of this, she could have one more night with him.

  One more crazy, kinky night.

  “Do your worst, Nicky.”

  His hand left her for a moment and then she heard the hard smack as he spanked her. His hand came down again and again, sparking against her flesh and making her shiver and shake with sensation. Ten times he slapped her ass and then he stopped, one hand slipping between her legs and teasing at her pussy.

  “I want you hot and wet for me.”

  She couldn’t be any other way. “I already feel it.”

  He tested her, sliding a f
inger in to part her labia. “Yes, that’s what I want.”

  She whimpered as his fingers receded after that minor play. She needed more. So much more.

  “You are not to run away ever again.” His hand rained down on her, but this time in an oddly soothing way. The pain was there, but something about the way he peppered the smacks spread heat through her system.

  “You started it.” She couldn’t seem to help herself. Not that she should. He had started it.

  The next one was rougher, but then his hand stilled as if he could hold the heat in. “I know I did, but I had my reasons. You had no reason to run except that I hurt you.”

  He needed to understand a few things. “No. I didn’t run because you hurt me. I wasn’t trying to be dramatic or to get your attention. I left because Ezra was willing to give me a say in how this investigation goes. He wasn’t going to lock me up and force me to wait around when I can help.”

  The next smack proved her theory. This one hurt like hell in comparison. The rest had been a fun game, a way to connect. This one was all about business. She hissed a little and then found herself squirming because despite the pain, she was getting hot and wet.

  “He put you in danger,” Nick insisted. The smack sounded through the air, jarring her and forcing her to focus on the moment.

  On the way she felt. On how every inch of her skin seemed open and willing to take his discipline.

  She groaned when he spanked her again. When she shifted slightly, she could feel the thick length of his erection under her belly. “I’m in danger every minute of every day, but I’m not going to hide from it when I might be the only one who can solve the mystery. I’m not going to be some toy you pull out and play with and then lock up when you’re done. I’m through hiding. If I get hurt, then at least I’ll know I lived.”

  The hand on her backside smoothed across her skin. “You’re precious to me. I can’t lie to you. I want you safe, but I also want you happy. Can we agree that I have the right to…how would Taggart put this…I reserve the right to lose my shit when assassins are after the woman I love.”

  Hearing that word come out of his mouth did something to her heart, but she tried to let her head remain in control. Something had happened to change his mind, but then they’d been here before a couple of times. She didn’t want to think about it. She could keep him for a while, could store up memories for that moment when he decided to leave again.

  “You can lose your shit, Nicky, but I can’t hide anymore.”

  She gasped as he flipped her over again, turning her neatly so she was in his lap, his arms supporting her. He stared down at her, his eyes serious. She couldn’t help but soften under his gaze.

  “You will hide nothing from me,” he said, his voice low. “And I will not hide from you. You have to be patient with me. I’ve lost so many women I loved. Please be patient and I will try.”

  She wasn’t sure she could ask more of him. Her heart ached because it was everything she’d ever wanted to hear and she wasn’t at all sure she could trust it. He had lost and those losses had preyed on him for years. Those losses had driven them apart. Why would they be able to come together now? She didn’t doubt the love she felt for him, only that it could last.

  He cradled her as he stood up. “I know you’re scared, dushka. I made you scared, but I won’t do it again. This time I won’t put anything above you. Not even my pride and my guilt. This time around you are the queen of my world.”

  She wanted so badly to believe him. Right now it didn’t matter. She was going to live in the present. Her whole life had been about working for a future, and now she understood how quickly it could all go away. Today was the only time she truly had and she was going to make the most of it. She wasn’t going to hold back. “Please make love to me, Nick.”

  Before Ezra came back and she was forced to deal with the problems that would come with the evening. Before she had to face her father.

  His lips curled up in the softest look she’d ever seen cross his face. “This, I can do. You should know that I came prepared. You should also know that I intend to be your servant in this life. My world will revolve around your happiness. I will make you my partner in all things, and I won’t ever again make a decision that affects us both without talking to you. We’re in this life together. I only request one place where I am king.”

  He strode back into the bedroom, carrying her like she weighed nothing at all. She got a better look at the presents Nick had left for her. While she’d been in the shower, he’d turned her nightstand into a table for his toys. For the objects he would use to bring her enormous amounts of pleasure.

  He set her on her feet at the end of the bed and she wondered when she’d gotten comfortable with her naked body. She liked being naked in front of him, enjoyed the vulnerability of being naked while he was fully clothed, loved how he towered over her. When had she begun to love the ache she felt in her cheeks?

  She looked at him, trying to memorize every expression on his face, the way his eyes seemed to heat as they looked at her, the way his hair curled slightly around his ears because he’d let it get a tiny bit too long.

  Hayley knew what he wanted and she wanted it, too. She’d thought perhaps she would never play again because she would never trust another man with her body the way she did Nick. She’d known she would never take another Dom. He was it for her, the only man she wanted taking control. The only man she would ever kneel for.

  The carpet was soft as she dropped down in front of him, beginning the exchange of power that would connect them. She lowered her head and placed her hands palms up on her thighs. Submission in the bedroom was her gift to him, her gift to herself.

  His hand came down on her head and she heard him sigh as though the connection somehow brought him real physical relief. “You have no idea how much I’ve missed this. How much I missed you. I know it’s only been a few days, but it felt like forever. I don’t want to be apart from you again, dushka.”

  She took a deep breath, fighting the emotion she felt. “I missed you, too.”

  Sometimes she felt like she’d spent most of her life missing him, longing for him. She wondered if she would ever be complete without him.

  “Do you have any idea what I want to do to you?”

  She had some thoughts on the matter. “Everything.”

  “That’s a good answer. I want everything from you. I want there to be no walls between us.” He tangled one hand in her hair and gently forced her to face him. The bite along her scalp sent a shiver down her spine. “I want you to stand up and lean over the bed. Palms on the mattress, legs apart, and I want that pretty ass in the air. You will keep your eyes forward. No peeking. Can you do that for me?”

  She nodded, thoughts of what he was going to do to her swirling through her head. Part of the fun was not knowing exactly what he would do, but giving him permission to do it all. He helped her to stand and when she began to turn, his head swooped down, locking her in a kiss.

  His tongue tangled with hers and she could feel his passion, his need. She gave him back her own. When he released her, she turned and did as he asked.

  Nick walked across the room, heading over to the nightstand. She stared straight ahead, not turning to look and see what he was prepping.

  A big hand slid over her back and down to her ass. “No, no. This won’t do, dushka. I need your ass higher. You’re going to have to do better.”

  There was a whooshing sound and then the crack of a crop on her ass. She hissed at the pain and then felt her pussy pulse. She had to bite back a groan. Hayley moved from her hands on the bed down to her elbows, her spine straight, placing her ass firmly in the air.

  So vulnerable. He was standing behind her and he would have access to all her tender parts. He would be able to touch her, to spank her, to do anything he liked.

  Now it seemed what he liked was using a crop to tease her.

  The cool of the leather tip traced the curves of her ass.


  “That’s much better.” Nick skimmed down the middle of her cheeks.

  She squealed as he brought the crop up and laid a little slap to her pussy. One and then another.

  “Yes.” His voice had deepened, his accent so much thicker. “This is exactly as I wished. I want you open to my every touch. This belongs to me. This body is mine to discipline and pleasure and worship and adore.”

  “Then you should definitely do those last three.”

  He chuckled. “Yes, you hate the discipline. I can tell. I can smell your arousal from here.”

  She couldn’t help that. It happened any time he was around, but he was also right. Her nipples felt heavy and she longed for him to touch her. Not in a soft, sweet way. No. She wanted the rough Dom with his tweaks and spanks, and that hard cock that would inevitably drive into her.

  One last swat had her panting and then he placed the crop on the bed next to her.

  “Don’t make me pick it up again. If you do, we’ll begin all over again and you’ll be that much further from getting what you want. If I have to start over, you’ll find I’ve brought along a nice ball gag that I won’t hesitate to use. I’ll tie you up and have my fun and it will be hours before I allow you to come.”

  She bit her bottom lip to keep from begging. Or saying something truly bratty because that was in there, too. She wasn’t scared of the ball gag, but drool wasn’t high on her list of sexy turn-ons.

  “That’s better.” Nick put a hand on the small of her back, steadying her. “I want you to stay still. You can whimper and whine all you like. Make all the noise you need to, but don’t move an inch or there will be punishment. This is going to be a bit chilly.”

  Hayley braced herself as Nick parted the cheeks of her ass, and then he was probing the sensitive rim of her asshole.