The Handy Men

by Jamie K. Schmidt

  “Why don’t you come over to our house after you’ve straightened up everything from dinner?”

  She shook her head. “I want to stay on the island in case something happens.”

  “We will, too. We got the power turned on at the rental house on Dune Street. That’s where Jack and I are staying.”

  Paige gasped in surprise.

  Dean narrowed his eyes. “Where did you think we were staying?”

  “With Stephanie.”

  He tucked his fingers under her chin. “No,” he said. “We want you.”

  “Don’t make me cry.”

  “Then don’t let the monkeys in your brain start telling you lies.” He hugged her tight. “Oh, Dean,” she choked as the tears flowed down her face.

  He wiped away her tears with his thumbs. “Then fight for us. Don’t give up.” He kissed her, a long and passionate one that made her breathless. “We’re 129 Dune Street. The red house. Come by tonight.”

  She nodded.

  “Where’s mine?” Jack asked, hauling her into his arms and kissing her senseless.

  “Not now, you ass.” Dean thumped him on the arm.

  He let Paige come up for air. When he put her down, Paige saw they had an audience—her parents were frowning at them from the doorway.

  “Uh oh, it’s the cops,” Jack said.

  “You need to leave right now,” her mother said, shaking her finger at them.

  “Mom.” Paige was horrified.

  “We don’t need any trouble,” her father said. “Just go.”

  “Trouble?” Crossing her arms in front of her chest, she glared at her parents. “You are being inexcusably rude to my friends.”

  “And you, young lady, are deliberately sabotaging your future.”

  “That’s my decision,” she said.

  “Is it?” her father asked. “Is it really?”

  Anger threatened to boil over, and if it weren’t for Jack’s comforting hug, she might have said or done something she regretted. She waited for the familiar panic to engulf her, but after a few deep breaths, she knew she wasn’t going to succumb to an attack.

  “It’s okay,” he said.

  “No it’s not,” she muttered, feeling the sting of tears at the corner of her eyes.

  “You want us to stick around?” Dean asked.

  “No, I’ll see you guys later. I want to rest a bit before I have to prepare for dinner.”

  “We’re just a phone call away.”

  Paige nodded. Brushing past her parents, she gave them a tight smile as she went into the kitchen. Her luck held, because they didn’t follow.

  …

  Jack and Dean sat on the bench at the dock. Dean could see the ferry coming in on the horizon.

  “We should have brought our poles,” Jack said. “We could catch a few bunkers while we’re waiting.”

  “One of us should stay here in case Paige needs us,” Dean fretted.

  “We’ll be gone two hours tops. All ten rooms are checked in. She’s going to be too busy with her parents and the food. We’d either just cause trouble or get in the way.”

  “Did you see the way her old man was glaring at us?”

  “Fuck him.” Jack crossed his arms over his chest. “Should have tongue kissed you next.”

  Dean punched him in the arm. “Don’t make trouble for her. She forgave your dumb ass for Stephanie.”

  “It was just lunch. Stephanie was our friend, in addition to being our lover. It was good to catch up.”

  “Yeah, but you got caught. We both did because I tried to cover for you.”

  “I wasn’t doing anything wrong. I didn’t need you to cover for me.”

  Dean sighed. “I know. That’s basically what Paige said. I shouldn’t have lied. It made us both look guiltier than hell.”

  Jack looked out at the water. “Stephanie is still as kinky as ever. She’s got bars in her nipples now. It’s hot. She showed me.”

  Dean groaned. “Please don’t tell Paige that.”

  “I behaved myself,” Jack said, holding up his palms. “I looked but didn’t touch. You would have looked, too.”

  “Did she flash the entire restaurant?”

  “Yeah, right in the open.”

  “Wow,” Dean said.

  “No one saw. The place was empty.”

  “You’re lucky Paige didn’t walk in on that little scene.”

  Jack sobered. “Shit, yeah. You’re right. I didn’t think of it like that.”

  “Did she say when she’d have the results of the paternity test?”

  “By tomorrow at the latest.”

  Dean blew out a breath. “You ready to be a dad?”

  “Hell yeah. I think. How about you?”

  “We’ll do all right. Do you think Brendon will grow to love us?”

  “Sure,” Jack said. “We’re likable guys. And if that doesn’t work, we can get him a shitload of toys and buy his love.”

  “You’re impossible.”

  A few seagulls swirled around and dove for some popcorn that had spilled on the deck.

  “I’m so mad at Stephanie. All I want to do is shout at her.”

  Jack fidgeted uncomfortably. “She knows. I can see why she did what she did. Let’s face it. Back then none of us were ready to be a threesome with a baby. Now we are.”

  “I know you love Paige,” Dean blurted out, “but be honest. Are you going to regret not letting Stephanie back in our lives?”

  Jack’s eyes narrowed. “Why are you asking? Do you want Stephanie over Paige?”

  “No. But I want you to be happy.”

  “So the compromise would be you keep Paige and I keep Stephanie? Because Paige isn’t going to let me within ten feet of her if I start banging Stephanie. And if you stay with Paige and I stay with Stephanie, that doesn’t leave a lot of ‘us’ time. The whole entire point of having a woman in our lives is I get to share her with you.”

  “I will always care for Stephanie,” Dean said. “And if one of us is Brendon’s father, she’s going to be in our lives. But I love Paige. It’s her I want as our wife.”

  Jack snorted. “That will never be legal. We’re lucky our union is still legal.”

  Dean shrugged. “I don’t need a piece of paper or a ceremony. I never did.” He held Jack’s hand.

  Jack squeezed it back. “Stephanie makes my dick hard.”

  Dean sighed.

  “But she doesn’t touch my heart. Paige is my choice. Now and forever. If Brendon is ours, we’ll make sure Paige knows that while Stephanie is the mother of our child, she’ll never be our wife. Paige is the only wife for us.”

  Dean hugged him. “Then that’s what we tell her. As soon as her parents go back to New York.”

  The ferry blew its horn and the dock crew scrambled to prepare for its arrival.

  “What do you have to pick up at home aside from a few board games?” Dean asked.

  Jack flashed him a wicked grin. “I’ve got a present for Paige I’ve been meaning to give her.”

  Chapter Thirteen

  Jack walked back on the ferry, he and Dean each lugging a large rolling suitcase. Jack had wanted to bring all the comforts of home, so he had his pillow and comforter in his suitcase, while Dean had the other essentials in his: their vintage Mrs. Tea, Dean’s manual coffee grinder, the instant pot, massage oil, vibrators, handcuffs, and other toys.

  They sat up on deck to enjoy the sunset and the Starbucks they’d bought onboard. Jack couldn’t help noticing a stacked blonde and a fussy-looking older man sitting near them. She was tapping a stylus on her tablet and he was flipping through a newspaper.

  “What was she thinking?” the man said.

  “I’m sure I don’t know, darling,” she replied, not looking up from her game.

  “She’s going to be homeless, and then she’s going to come begging at our door.”

  “She’s got parents, Fred. She’ll go to them, not us.”

  Fred? Jack nudged Dean with his elbow.


  Dean cracked an eye open. Whoops, he’d been napping with his venti macchiato in his hand. Jack inclined his head over at the couple. Dean shrugged at him.

  “It’s not like her not to return my emails.”

  “Maybe she’s sick of your shit.”

  “Barbie! I don’t like that language.”

  Dean stiffened and sat up, exchanging a wide-eyed glance with Jack. Barbie and Fred? It couldn’t be. Yet, it was too coincidental that this wasn’t Paige’s ex and his new fiancée.

  “And I’m sick of hearing about your ex-wife,” Barbie countered. “It’s always Paige should do this, and Paige should do that. The only reason I agreed to come along with you is because I’ve always liked Hamlet Island. I think it will be a great place to hold our wedding, if you can shut up for ten minutes about Paige.”

  Jack and Dean leaned forward, trying not to appear like they were eavesdropping.

  “I didn’t tell you the worst of it.”

  “And for that, I thank you,” she said with a sigh.

  “She’s dating a gay couple.”

  Jack choked on his iced tea.

  “That would make them a bisexual couple,” Barbie pointed out.

  “It’s disgusting.”

  “What’s so disgusting about it? Two men at once. Bravo. Give her a medal. You’re not jealous are you?” Barbie growled.

  “What? No. Of course not. I made my choice, Barbie. I want you.”

  “Then who gives a flying fuck whose cock she’s worshipping?”

  Fred cringed and flinched, probably at her harsh language.

  Dean was trying not to snort coffee out of his nose.

  “My cock,” Jack mouthed and then pointed to his crotch with two thumbs up.

  Dean smacked him.

  “And yours,” Jack mouthed and pointed.

  Dean whacked him again.

  “It’s not decent,” Fred grumbled.

  Dean flipped him off. Jack grabbed his hand and brought it to the table before the couple noticed.

  Barbie shrugged. “Neither was screwing around on your wife, but you’re not all on the moral high ground about that, are you?”

  “I like her,” Dean whispered. “I mean, I know I’m supposed to hate her for breaking up Paige’s marriage, but I’m kind of glad she did.”

  Jack gave him a thumbs-up.

  “That has nothing to do with this,” Fred said. “Her father called me last night to come and talk some sense into her. If she doesn’t dump the gay guys, he’s going to call in her loan. She doesn’t have sixty thousand dollars. She’ll be forced into bankruptcy and she’ll be homeless. And since her parents caused it, she’s not going to go to them for help.”

  “Her parents sound like real dicks,” Barbie said.

  Jack nodded. He agreed.

  Dean got up and motioned for him to follow.

  Once they were inside the ferry’s enclosed seating area Jack said, “How much money do we have?”

  “We don’t have sixty thousand. The taxes on both houses have been killing us, especially since we haven’t had a tenant in over a year. We might be able to take another mortgage out, though. But I’m not sure Paige would accept our help.”

  “If it means that or running back home to her shithead parents or douchebag ex-husband, I’d like to think she’d swallow her pride and take it,” Jack said.

  “It’s not fair that she’s going through this because of us.”

  “She chose us. She knew what she was getting into, and we can handle this. All of us, together.”

  Dean shook his head. “I don’t know. Maybe we should stay away until her parents go home. Let them think they won.”

  “What if they don’t go? I’m not sneaking around the island to see my girl. This is the whole Stephanie bullshit all over.”

  “It’s worse. No one was going to ruin Stephanie’s livelihood if she was fucking us.”

  Jack wanted to punch something. “What are we going to do?”

  “We have to tell her, but I can’t get a signal yet.” Dean glared at his phone.

  “Well, let’s get back out there and see what else we can find out.” Jack pushed through the doors and walked nonchalantly passed the couple to hang off the railing. He pretended to look out at the waves, but he was preoccupied trying to figure out how to swing their finances to best help Paige. Unfortunately, Dean was the accountant, not him. And what if they had to pay child support? He ran his fingers through his hair and tamped down the panic.

  Dean slung himself back into the chair and closed his eyes, probably pretending to take a nap. Unfortunately, the couple had finished their conversation. Unable to sit still, Jack paced around the ferry. When he got to the bow, he could see Hamlet Island up ahead. He had enough bars to make a phone call, but he saw that Stephanie left a message. He listened to it.

  “Hi, Jack. I left a message for Dean, too. Um. Congratulations. Dean’s the father. I’m sorry it’s taken me this long to sort everything out in my head. I know he’s pissed off at me. I’m not trying to ruin things with you guys and Paige. But I thought you should know. I’m at my parents’ house”—she took a deep breath—“my house now. My mom’s leaving for Florida next week, but if you want to come by, I’d love for us to tell Brendon together. If you want. Call me.”

  Jack blew out a breath. There was a pang of disappointment he wasn’t the biological father. Straightening his shoulders, he forced his feeling aside. It didn’t matter if Brendon was his or Dean’s—they were going to both be Brendon’s fathers. He ran back to Dean to tell him the news.

  “Get your ass up. I need to talk to you.”

  Dean frowned but followed him back inside the large seating room of the ferry. Ducking into a table by the men’s room, Jack motioned for him to sit down.

  “Stephanie called.” Jack swallowed. “The baby is yours.”

  Closing his eyes, Dean took several long breaths. “Damn it,” he said quietly.

  Jack felt like he’d hit him with a sucker punch to the kidneys.

  “I thought you wanted…” Jack’s voice trailed off as words failed him.

  “This is such a clusterfuck. I know you were hoping for this, but it would have been so much easier if Stephanie was out of our lives.”

  It was hard to hold on to his temper. “We’re talking about a two-year-old boy. Your son.”

  “I know.” Dean pinched his nose. “It’s a shock.”

  Slamming his hands on the table, Jack half rose out of his seat. “What is your fucking problem?”

  Dean pushed him back into his seat, looking around to see if they were attracting attention. “Paige doesn’t need this shit right now on top of everything else.”

  “So we’re going to lie to her? Keep it from her? It didn’t turn out so good the last time.”

  “The news can wait a week, can’t it?”

  “You’re going to wait a week to meet your son? After all this time?”

  “No.” Dean sighed. “I don’t know.”

  “Paige will understand.”

  Nodding, Dean gripped Jack’s shoulder. “I know. Paige will. But what about everyone else?”

  “Who cares?”

  “Brendon might when he’s older.”

  Jack cursed.

  “You saw the way her parents looked at us. Do you think they’d be doting grandparents?”

  “How the hell should I know?” Jack growled. “I just found out about him two minutes ago.”

  “Me, too. I’m a little thrown. One minute we were talking about mortgaging the house, and the next minute we have to start saving up for college.”

  “We’ve got a few years on that one,” Jack said drily. His heart was aching. If Brendon was his son, there was nothing that would keep him from him. Hell, he’d probably jump off the ferry and swim to shore. It hurt that Dean wasn’t as excited as he was.

  “This is going to change our lives. All of our lives.”

  Jack nodded. “A baby does that. Tell me you’re
good with all of this. Please tell me he’ll be in our lives.”

  “Of course. Of course.” Dean went around the table and hugged Jack. “I just want to make this easy on all of us. You, me, Paige, and Brendon.”

  …

  Paige had just finished serving dinner and stepped out on the porch to enjoy the sunset when Dean’s text came through.

  Fred & Barbie are on the ferry with us. Your dad called him to tell you to dump us.

  “Holy shit,” Paige breathed. She darted back inside even as more texts started to come through. “Anna,” she called to the older housekeeper. “I’ve got visitors coming in on the ferry. Can you manage without me?”

  “Sure,” she said. “You go. I got this.”

  “My cell phone number is on the fridge if you need me.”

  Paige grabbed her bike with the new tire Dean put on and scrolled through the other texts before getting on.

  Parents are going to use the loan as leverage to stop seeing us.

  “No shit,” she murmured. She should have known it was too good to be true.

  Brendon’s mine.

  Paige blew out a shaky breath. She could handle this. She would handle this.

  We need to talk. Meet us at the pavilion in a half hour.

  Paige rode her bike over to the pavilion and paced around inside while she waited for them. Emotions churned in her stomach. She didn’t know what the hell she was going to do, but at least Jack and Dean were there with her. She wasn’t alone.

  Pausing at the changing room where she saw Jack and Dean going at it, Paige tried to feel something besides nervousness. Maybe they wanted to have sex with her here to cheer her up. The hollow feeling in her chest wouldn’t go away.

  When they finally walked in, she threw herself into their arms. She hugged both of them tight, trying to blink back tears. For the first time, it felt awkward when she clung to them and they seemed stiff.

  Pulling away, Paige sniffed and wiped the tears away with the back of her hand. “What a day, right?”

  Jack looked at his feet and there was pain in Dean’s eyes.

  “Congratulations,” she whispered, feeling cold dread fill over her.

  “Paige, Jack and I have been talking.”

  No. Please. No.

  Paige forced herself to nod.

  “We should take a break.”