by Susan Lewis
'Then I have to ask if he's married.'
'To which I have to reply, he might be. Actually he is, but not for much longer ...'
Julia snatched up the phone and, hands shaking, somehow punched in Josh's number.
'Is she talking about you?' she demanded breathlessly when he answered.
'What?'
'Sylvia's on the radio and I need to know she's not talking about you.'
'I don't even know what she's saying,' he retorted furiously.
'She's telling everyone about the married man she's in love with, who's in love with her, and ...'
'Then of course she's not talking about me,' he cut in, 'now calm down, will you?'
'What do you mean calm down?' she almost screamed. 'She's just announced to the fucking world that you're not going to be married much longer ...'
'I'm not getting into this.'
'Don't you dare ring off. I want to know why that bitch is on the radio talking about the breakup of my marriage when you haven't even discussed it with me?'
'And nor have I discussed it with her. So whoever she's talking about, it's not me.'
'Then who is it?'
'How the hell do I know?
'You know what games she plays, and the timing of this ... Josh, what else am I supposed to think?'
You can think what you like, it doesn't make it a fact'
'Then I want to know if you've seen her.' 'You're in no position to be asking that question,' he said coldly. 'Tell me,' she shouted.
'I'm ending this call now, we'll speak again later when you've got yourself under control.'
'You bastard!' she screamed as he rang off. 'You bastard, you bastard,' and dropping the phone, she doubled over in anguish and despair. 'I'm going to kill you, or her, or somebody, because I can't take any more of this,' she sobbed, and suddenly grabbing the phone again she jabbed in Sylvia's mobile number.
'I want you to listen to this,' she raged as Sylvia answered, 'and I want you to listen hard, because these are the names that are going public if you go anywhere near my husband again.' Then in a voice shaking with fury she listed two top-level government officials, three senior publishing executives, one media mogul and several sportsmen, all married and all still very much in the public eye. She then rounded it off by saying, 'You're a slut, Sylvia, a sad, sorry, pretentious little slut who preys on other women's husbands because she can't get a man of her own. I know, better than anyone, how you got to where you are, because you shagged Jack McKenzie - an eighty-seven-year-old man who was your boss and mine - when you were only twenty-three, and then you promised him more if he did the right thing with your book. And he got more, didn't he, because you'll turn it on for anyone, as long
as you get what you want out of it. Oh, I'm not saying you don't have talent, but you're even better as a whore. And now you're trying to get your claws into Josh, thinking you'll be able to take from me the one thing I've always had that you never have, a man who totally loves you. Well, dream on, Sylvia, because it's not going to happen. You don't have what it takes to hold onto a man - if you did, you'd have done it by now. You think the whole world finds you fascinating and mysterious and sexy, but you're nothing but a waste of space. No-one has any real time for you, so why don't you do us all a favour and drive a stake through your own heart?'
She was about to hang up when Sylvia said, 'Pretty speech, darling, but I have to wonder what you're getting so worked up about if you're so certain Josh still loves you,' and before Julia could respond she cut the line dead.
'Who was that?' Robin asked as Sylvia dropped her mobile back into her bag.
'Oh just some hysterical wife,' she responded, not meeting his eyes. 'You know how they come crawling out of the woodwork every time I've got a book out.'
Robin regarded her carefully, while refilling their glasses with sparkling water. 'Correct me if I'm wrong,' he said, 'but this one seems to have got under your skin a tad.'
Sylvia cocked an eyebrow. 'Not a bit,' she replied, waving a dismissive hand. 'No, I was just thinking about this evening, and the speech I have to give.'
Robin looked sceptical, then with a mischievous grin he said, 'So it wasn't Julia Thayne?'
Sylvia's eyes narrowed, but since he'd heard the interview she'd recorded yesterday and witnessed the fuss she'd made about ensuring Josh was sitting at the top table with her tonight, she saw no point in denying it. 'Actually, it was her,' she said. 'And before you start getting on my case about betraying a friend, I already feel bad enough, thank you very much. But what are Josh and I supposed to do? We didn't ask for this to happen. God knows, it was the last thing we wanted, but we're so completely mad about each other that neither of us wants to go on hiding it, and tonight's a special night for me, so obviously he wants to be there.'
Robin was shaking his head incredulously. 'So I am right' he said. 'Shit, I never thought I'd see the day when those two broke up. They've always been so dose.'
Sylvia looked mournful as she said, 'I know that's how it seems to outsiders, but like most marriages there's a whole lot that goes on behind the scenes you never get to see. Theirs has been falling apart for quite some time, and I swear it had nothing to do with me. Josh and I have only been together for a few months ...' 'But Julia's obviously not taking it well.' 'We never thought she would. Obviously, it's going to be a difficult time for her, which is why Josh and I need to be patient and do everything we can to lessen her pain.'
'And to do that you're going to flaunt your relationship at the party tonight?'
Sylvia shrugged. 'She has to get used to the idea we're together now,' she replied smoothly. 'Of course it's going to be hard, but Josh and I have our lives too.'
Robin looked at her closely, but remembering who was paying for lunch, he only said, 'You sure do, and who am I to criticise? If you're in love, you're in love, so good luck to you. I just need to know what to say when everyone starts asking me tonight if he's the one you talked about in the interview.'
Sylvia's eyes glowed. 'You can tell them that he is,' she replied. 'In fact, you can even tip a couple of them off in advance, because it might be quite nice to have some shots of us arriving. A new book, a new love, and a new life.' Liking the sound of that, she said it again, while taking out her mobile to call and make sure Josh hadn't forgotten his promise to come early tonight. And maybe, while she was at it, she'd suggest he stayed the entire night, because it would be too awful if he got up to go home - and it wasn't as if the children were that young any more, or even on their own.
Finding herself going straight through to voicemail, she left him a message, then looked at Robin who was already on the line tipping off one of his major diary contacts. As she listened Sylvia couldn't help being impressed.
'I'm telling you, Sylvia would go utterly ballistic if she knew I was giving you this,' he informed the person at the other end. 'It's top, top secret, not supposed to be out for weeks yet, so officially, tonight, they're just friends. But I owe you, mate, so I'm letting you have it now. Just remember, you
never heard it from me.' He paused, then winked at Sylvia as he said, 'That's right. They're completely mad about each other, that's why he's going to be there for her tonight.'
Josh was already dressed in his dinner suit, and wearing a black cashmere overcoat with a pale silk scarf around the collar, as he knocked on shannon's open door to let her know he was there. 'Everything OK?' he asked, going to stand behind her at the computer.
'Yeah, I'm fine,' she answered, keeping her eyes on the screen. 'Just got a lot of revising to do.'
'Anything I can help with?'
'No, if s OK.'
As he looked down at the work she was doing, he was wondering whether or not to broach the subject of Julia, and in the end decided he ought at least to attempt it. 'Have you spoken to Mum today?' he asked.
'No, and please don't try and make me, because I really, really don't want to.'
He put his hands on her shoulders, as though to stop
her becoming angry. 'But you know, what happened down there ...'
'I don't want to talk about it,' she cut in.
Since he didn't either he was happy to let it go, though he knew it wasn't good for Shannon to prolong her refusal to speak to her mother. However, nOW was hardly the time to try and force matters, when he was on his way out, and since she seemed OK for the moment, he dropped a kiss on her head and was just going through the door, when she said, 'You look nice. Where are you going?'
'To a launch party,' he answered, turning back.
'Must be a posh one, if it's black tie.' 'Sort of,'he responded, finding himself thinking of the many times he'd left the house dressed like this, with Julia looking absolutely stunning beside him. 'Do you mind me going out?' he asked.
She shrugged. 'No, it's fine. Have a nice time.'
He smiled, then came back to kiss her again.
This time she tilted her face to look up at him. 'I really love you, Dad,' she said, gazing earnestly into his eyes.
Knowing it was her way of trying to make him feel better about what had happened between Julia and Rico, he said, 'I know, and I really love you too.'
Seeming satisfied with that, she returned to the keyboard and began typing again. Leaving her to it, he went to check on Dan who was teaching his grandmother how to download music, then after making sure he had his wallet and keys, he let himself quietly out of the front door.
It was a cold, blustery night, with early fireworks squealing and exploding overhead, and the usual logjam of traffic leading from Holland Park up to Notting Hill. It shouldn't take him long to get there though, for it was hardly any distance, and even if he stopped for flowers he should still make it on time.
As he turned out onto the main road his mobile started to ring, but seeing it was Julia he let it go through to voicemail. He didn't want to speak to her now, he hardly wanted to speak to her at all, though obviously he had to for the children's sake, and he guessed sooner or later they'd have to
discuss what had happened and where they went now. The trouble was, he was still so damned angry about what she'd done, and the way she'd allowed Shannon to walk in on it, that he couldn't trust himself to hold onto his temper long enough to achieve anything worthwhile when they did speak. As it was, every communication they'd had after she d screwed the Italian had turned into an almighty row and the boy's name hadn't even been mentioned since then, so God only knew what would happen when it was.
Remembering how distraught she'd sounded earlier, when she'd called about Sylvia's radio interview, started him wondering again what Sylvia had actually said. Since he'd been in meetings all afternoon he hadn't had the opportunity to ask her, though she'd called him plenty of times, leaving messages that made it abundantly clear what she was expecting the minute he walked in the door tonight. Oddly, the thought of it didn't seem to be turning him on the way it normally did, in fact, he was almost beginning to wish he'd arranged to meet her there, rather than pick her up at home. However, it was too late now, he was already on his way, and as long as she got it out of her head that he'd be staying the night, there didn't seem any reason why they shouldn't have a good time catching up with colleagues and old friends at the party.
Coming to a stop at the Notting Hill traffic lights, he reached for his mobile to see if Julia had left a message, but, unusually, she hadn't. He wasn't quite sure what to make of that, he only knew that going to a function like this without her
was starting to feel uncomfortably strange. He hardly ever socialised unless she was with him, and knowing everyone was bound to ask where she was, he was almost regretting his decision to go. He wondered what she was doing down there now, if she was still tearing herself apart over Sylvia's interview, or maybe she was so busy fucking the Italian she'd forgotten all about it.
Just to think of her with another man pierced him to his very soul, while doubly hardening his resolve not to let her come back to London until things had had time to cool down considerably. The fact that she hadn't just defied him over that and got in the car anyway - which would be much more like her - went to prove that she was too wrapped up in the boy to care. Though he admitted that subconsciously he knew that probably wasn't true, all he was allowing himself to see right now was the total fucking bullshit she'd been spinning him about some kind of mental block on being able to make love with him, because she'd clearly got it on with the Italian no problem at all. And since, by her own admission, he'd taken her to the stars, then she could fucking well stay there, orbiting the planet in an orgasmic fucking frenzy, until she couldn't take any more - and if she thought he was going to be there to catch her when she decided she'd had enough, she was going to be in for one big fucking surprise.
The lights turned green and he pulled away far too fast, only narrowly missing a young woman who was running to get clear. After accepting her storm of abuse, and mouthing an apology, he made a more careful left turn and drove on to the flower
stall. God only knew what kind of flowers Sylvia liked, but since it was her publication day he guessed he should take some. After allowing the vendor to do the choosing, he carried them back to the car and continued his journey, finding himself troubled again by exactly what might have been said in that interview. But if she'd been going on about some great love and a marriage breaking up, she couldn't have been talking about him. It was just plain absurd to think it, when nothing like it had ever entered his head, never mind crossed his lips. Except Julia might have a point about the timing, and when he considered the different tone of Sylvia's messages since his last call, and this kind-of-date situation he was in tonight he started to feel more than a little uneasy, and wished he'd thought more carefully before accepting her invite.
Surely she couldn't be telling herself that there was something serious between them, when she knew very well that the most they'd ever amounted to was an occasional good screw? Yet even as he was thinking it, his gut was responding in a way he didn't like at all, because he could see that maybe there was a chance she'd been talking about him, and if she had, he now had to start wondering what tonight was really all about. As far he was concerned, he'd only called her again because he'd wanted to screw her as some kind of revenge on Julia. Obviously she hadn't known that, so, as usual, she'd told him to come right away, but then something had come up with Dan, and when he'd called to rearrange she'd suggested he might tike to be her escort at the party tonight -
and without giving it any particular thought, he'd agreed.
Only now were the repercussions of his knee- jerk response to Julia's betrayal dawning on him, for he was beginning to see how Sylvia might have read much more than he'd ever intended into the fact that he'd called her so soon after insisting it was all over. And that he was amenable to attending an event that was so significant for her, not merely as a guest - which was more or less as he'd seen himself - but as an escort, could, without a doubt, have sent all the wrong signals.
Realising he had to sort this out in his head before he went any further, he pulled over to the side of the road and turned off the engine. It didn't matter if he was late, because he had no intention of screwing her when he got there anyway. Right at this moment, he wasn't entirely sure he was even going to go. It would be hard on her if he let her down at this late hour, but insane with jealousy as he was over Julia and her Italian, to go flaunting Sylvia in Julia's face like this wasn't the kind of payback she deserved. Considering his own miserable show of fidelity, he couldn't even say what she did deserve, but as he stared out at the dark, windy night, with its constantly moving headlights and scurrying pedestrians, he simply couldn't escape the fact that he was in the wrong place, heading in the wrong direction, towards the wrong woman.
Picking up his mobile, he pressed in Sylvia's number, and waited for her to answer.
'Hi, darling,' she said, apparently already knowing it was him on the line. 'Are you almost
here? I've got champagne on ice, and nothing on me...'
'Sylvia. I won't be coming,' he said.
For a moment there was only a stunned silence, until she said, 'But darling, you have to. Everything's all arranged ...'
'I'm sorry, I know this is very short notice, but I'm sure you'll find someone else to step in.'
'Like who?' she said icily.
'Maybe the man you were talking about on the radio today.'
She laughed incredulously. 'Well, surely you realised that was you,' she responded. Then, in a gentler, more affectionate tone, 'Did you like what I said about you being handsome ... ?'
'Sylvia, we've been to bed together a few times and it was good, but that's all there is between us, so to go on the radio ...'
'Darling, I don't think you understand what I'm saying. I'm completely, madly and incurably in love with you, which is something that has never happened to me before. Isn't that amazing? Don't you realise how many men there are out there who'd give their eye teeth to have me feel that way about them?'
'Then you need to be with them,' he replied.
There was a startled moment before she said, "What do you mean? Didn't you hear what I just said?'
'Yes, I did and I can see now what a big mistake I made in calling you the other night...'
'You called because you just had to see me,' she reminded him. 'Those were your words, Joshua, "Sylvia, I have to see you,"' She took a breath, and
softened her tone as she said, 'Josh, please don't go back on this now. I'm sorry if I jumped the gun today, but I was just so excited about seeing you tonight, and I'm being completely honest when I say I've never felt this way before. God, you must know that. I mean, when have you ever heard me talking like this? I love you, and I can't pretend I don't, not to you, but if you don't want to go public with anything yet, that's fine...'
'There's nothing to go public with ...' 'OK, OK, I'll play it whichever way you want,' she went on, clearly not listening. 'Just say you'll come tonight, please. Everyone's expecting to see you at the party. You're on the top table, next to me.' He said nothing, only knew that it wasn't going to happen.
