I bit my tongue. There were many things that would mean a lot to me, but I never made it a point to demand it from him. However, as I took in the way his bottom lip curved down slightly and the way his thick eyelashes lowered as if shielding his brown eyes from an onslaught of my fury, I couldn’t find it in myself to say no. My shoulders sagged forward in defeat.
“Fine,” I relented. “Let me call Justin. He’s my backup key holder in case I caught the flu or something.”
“Thank you.” And he really looked as if he meant it.
I stepped away from him and turned my back, even though I wanted nothing more than to look at his face and etch it into memory. Jesse also backed away from me giving me ample space to lie.
Sighing, I quickly dialed Justin, an associate who was just a few years older than me. He had quickly become a favorite of my dad’s due to his incessant need to brown nose. Because of this I knew he’d jump at the chance to cover for me. The only problem was that I hated lying. Besides being horrible at it, I could never shake the feeling that karma would bite me in the ass one day. I convinced myself I was doing my friend a favor and because of this I’d be in store for some cosmic reward.
Justin picked up after one ring. “Hello?”
“Justin? Cough. Cough. I’m not feeling too well. Do you think you can take over my shift?”
“Uh…”
Of course he’d be hesitant the day I needed him to.
I forced out a raspy tone. “Please?”
He let out a breath. “Fine, but if it’s okay with you, can my girlfriend hang out in the break room? She’s visiting from out of state and that’s kind of why I took today off.”
Fuck! I had forgotten he had put in for time off weeks ago.
Feeling horrible, I quickly backtracked. “You know what? Never mind. I’ll just come in.”
I felt Jesse walk up to me and stand so close to me that he was practically breathing down my neck.
Justin chuckled. “You can’t go in if you’re sick.”
“And we can’t have non-employees in the break room.”
“Your mom lets Ethan in.”
Well, shit, he got me there.
Deciding it was an awesome time for my mother to take cosmic responsibility for practically shoveling me off on Ethan, I agreed. At least I’d have an argument to back me up in case the shit hit the fan. “Fine. You can take her there; just keep an eye on her.”
“She’s not going to steal anything,” Justin grunted.
“I know. It’s just…you know what? Never mind. Thank you.” Before I hung up the phone I threw in two more fake coughs for good measure.
Jesse took a step away from me. His face had relaxed considerably. “You could win an Oscar.”
“Shut up.” I took a deep breath and shoved my phone into my parka’s pocket. “Where are we going?
“Charleston.”
Chapter 19
Charleston was a good four hours away from our tiny town of Bethel Falls. The thought of being cooped up with Jesse for so long did things to my body that I’d be too ashamed to say out loud.
We were about twenty minutes into our journey and about twenty minutes into sitting in complete silence. With nothing but the radio playing quietly, we trudged the 200-odd miles to our destination.
Seeing as I didn’t have a chance to pack my phone charger, I opted to stare out the window to occupy myself and save my phone’s battery in case I needed it. Not that I suspected I’d have to call someone for help, but you can never be too careful. I had no idea what my parents used to do during long drives back in the day. Sitting with my hands idle was driving me crazy. It looked as if I wasn’t the only one going insane. Jesse reached out and turned off the radio, settling back into his seat.
Great. Now it’s even more awkward.
“Really? Are you going to torture me with your lack of conversation?” I muttered, crossing my arms in annoyance.
“Fine, I deserve that.” He quickly glanced over at me. “The same way I deserve your trust?”
“My trust? This coming from a guy who spent the last five years pretending I didn’t exist? Oh, yeah you’re a real trustworthy guy.”
He slowly licked his bottom lip, and despite my annoyance, I couldn’t help but follow the path it made and pictured my own tongue doing the same. I shook my head and blinked away the thoughts. “What’s your deal, Jesse? First you ignore me then you kidnap me?”
“I didn’t kidnap you. You came willingly.” His lips slowly curled into a grin. “That’s what I’m going to tell the cops, anyway.”
I shut my eyes and shook my head, but couldn’t help but smile. “Can you just explain to me why we’re going to Charleston?”
“You’ll see when we get there, but for now I think it’d be good if we talked.”
“Oh?” I immediately perked up. “About what?”
“Our dinner at the burger joint was not enough to catch us up on five years, don’t you think?”
“Well, whose fault is that?” I mumbled under my breath.
Jesse must have heard me. “It’d be easier if you kept an open mind, okay? I know you’re mad at me and God, I know I deserve it, but please just hear me out before you make quick judgments.”
“Fine. I’m listening.”
Jesse paused. “Well, I was kind of hoping you’d go first.”
“Me? I’m not the one who has explaining to do.”
“Please.”
I groaned. “What would I even talk about?”
“Let’s start from the beginning.”
“Like what?”
Keeping his eyes on the road, he gripped the steering wheel tightly and ground out. “Like why did you change?”
“I didn’t—”
“You might not see it,” he interrupted me. “Hell, Stephanie probably doesn’t, either. You two are so tightly wrapped inside the cocoon that is Bethel Falls that you both don’t realize that you’ve become such a scared, nervous person. Where’s the girl who was up for anything? My go-to chick.”
“Don’t call me a chick. I’m not an animal.”
“There we go. There’s that spunk I missed.” He chuckled, peering at me from the corners of his eyes. “I was hoping it didn’t disappear.”
I fidgeted in my seat as an enlightening thought entered my mind. How do you expect to have him share everything about himself if you can’t even do it with him?
I curled my lips in and out as if I were applying lipstick. I was stalling, but I knew I couldn’t do it anymore.
“I don’t paint anymore,” I revealed.
“What?” He glanced over at me with a bewildered expression on his face. “Why?”
“In high school I was…braver. I hadn’t yet experienced how mean the world could be and because of that, I was okay being myself.”
“What are you talking about?” His voice dripped with concern. Despite having the car’s center console between us, he shifted slightly as if to hover over me. To shield me from whatever monsters lurked inside of my mind—the same way he used to do when we were younger.
“I had you…and Stephanie. You both made me feel as if I could be anything without repercussions and it’s probably why I tagged along with you so much.”
His lips tightened.
“Once I was in college—”
“You mean after I left,” he corrected.
“That too,” I whispered shakily. I cleared my throat and dove back into memories I’d much rather forget. “I was out in the real world. I was alone at college and got to see how cruel the world outside Bethel Falls could be. The art teachers I used to love in high school turned into these mean professors who berated every sketch, sculpture, and painting I turned in. I didn’t let that stop me though, not at first.”
“What do you mean?” he asked in a somber tone.
I shut my eyes and pictured Promenade Gallery, the hippest gallery in the sleepy college town of Everton. It was located in a small one story building, which was made
out of ivy covered white bricks just a few blocks away from the university. Each semester the curators would pick the college’s brightest art students for a showcase and each semester I would try my hardest to be chosen. My time finally came during my senior year. Ecstatic couldn’t even begin to describe how I felt. Before opening night I even went so far as to lay out my best outfit, extremely excited to schmooze with the city’s finest artists.
“My pieces were hung towards the back of the gallery,” I explained with cloudy eyes. “It was located in a small corner that perfectly amplified everyone’s voices. You could stand at one spot and hear everything.”
“Uh oh.”
“It started off with one person calling my work amateurish. Sure, it burned a little, but I was an amateur. Besides, everyone was entitled to their own opinion.” I kept my face forward and though I couldn’t see Jesse I was sure he wore the same look of pity I often saw on Stephanie’s face whenever I told the story. “Then it happened again and then again and then again. By the end of the night I felt as if my paintings were physically ripped into shreds. Shit, I wanted to rip them down myself.”
Jesse swallowed loudly. “So that’s why you don’t do art anymore?”
“Not at first,” I corrected him. “I convinced myself that even the best artists had critics.”
“So what happened?”
“It took about three failed paintings to realize that every piece I worked on was…strained. I spent too much of my time worrying about what other people might think and because of that all the emotion in my paintings was gone. Everything became stark and robotic. By the time I graduated I barely passed any of my classes. Any hope of me painting for a living was thrown out the door. The day I graduated I packed up my things and left Everton without looking back. I needed to go back to a place that was familiar—a place I could rely on. That’s the reason why―”
“Why you haven’t moved away from Bethel Falls. Got it.”
It sucked having to relive that moment in my life again. It was something not even my family would bring up. Yet if Jesse was going to divulge parts of him that weren’t comfortable I guess I needed to as well.
“Is that the reason you’ve become so…”
“So what?” I asked with a frown.
“Complacent. With work and with Ethan.”
“What is your obsession with him?” I snapped.
“Moving on,” he said quickly.
I rolled my eyes. “Anyway, I do miss the rush I got when I painted, but I guess I’m still too scared to try it again.”
“Were you ever scared of the stuff we did when we were younger?” he asked suddenly.
My cheeks reddened. “Sneaking out? Jumping into your mom’s car at fifteen and driving without a license? Yes, I was petrified.”
“So why didn’t that stop you? Why are you so scared to pick up a brush and paint when you so willingly accompanied me on those stupid, reckless adventures? And tell me the truth. None of that ‘I was protecting you’ crap.”
“Because…”
That’s when it hit me. I was never only protecting Jesse. I did those things to push my boundaries. I didn’t let fear get to me because I was the one that felt protected. I knew Jesse would be my shield no matter what.
“It’s because you were there,” I whispered only loud enough for me to hear.
“What was that?”
I gulped. “It’s because I knew you’d never let anything bad happen to me.”
He blinked quickly, but never said a word.
Chapter 20
“Rocky. Rocky. Wake up.”
I felt myself being shaken and slowly opened my eyes.
“We’re here.” Jesse reached out and pushed a few strands of my hair from my face. His skin grazed mine so gently that it almost relaxed me back to sleep.
“What time is it?” I yawned and stretched my arms in the air, hitting the ceiling of the car. As impossible as it sounds, for a moment I had forgotten where we were.
“Just a little after five. We hit some traffic around the junction, but made pretty good time.” He looked around nervously. “Are you ready?”
I was sitting straight up now and looking around in awe. Having only ever been in North Carolina, it was beyond interesting to see everything so different. The buildings around us had such a vintage feel to them and were definitely southern architecture at its finest. It was also odd to see palm trees lining one side of the road and a plantation looking building on the other. I felt as if I had just stepped into wonderland.
“Where are we?” I asked before stopping myself. Rolling my eyes, I glanced back at him and replied, “If you say Charleston I’m going to sock you.
He snorted. “There’s that spirit I thought you lost.”
I shifted uncomfortably. “Really, where are we?”
“Welcome to my restaurant.”
“Your what?” Blinking quickly, I looked around and realized we were parked in the middle of a huge lot. A decent sized restaurant sat behind us, painted bright yellow with a sign that read Tyler Tavern. “Whoa.”
“A bit hard to believe?” It was a joke, though I could tell he meant the question.
“I…I didn’t know you liked to cook.” Out of all the things I could have said, I chose that. Awesome.
He scratched his head. “Yeah…I didn’t know either until a few years ago. I started off as a busboy and I just fell into it.”
“Fell into opening up your own restaurant? Right.” Truth be told I was in awe, but once again the realization I had no idea what my best friend was up to hit me harder than I would have liked. I was hurt, yes, but I was also really proud of him—proud of what he had become.
“Shall we?”
I swallowed. “Sure.”
He eyed me up and down. “You probably won’t need that jacket. It’s pretty cold for Charleston weather, but you should be pretty warm.”
Pressing my lips together in a tight smile, I peeled off my huge parka and stepped out of the car. It was odd being outside in January with nothing but a hoodie on, but I wasn’t complaining.
Jesse and I walked shoulder to shoulder, silent the whole way into the restaurant. My insides turned and I couldn’t figure out why I was so nervous. Feeling a need to say anything to keep my sanity level in check I asked, “When did you open this?”
“Just a little over a year ago. It’s actually co-owned by my dad. He and I started off on this venture together, but he handles most of the business side to it. I’m the head chef.”
“Wow.” A random memory popped into my head. “Is that what you mean about having something in common with your mom?”
“What are you talking about?”
“When we were talking about her job at Gold Diner you said that you had that in common with her.”
“Oh.” His mouth formed a perfect circle as he pushed the front door open for me. “Yeah, well I guess the apple really doesn’t fall far from the tree.”
The restaurant was packed with the dinner crowd. Silverware clattered against dishes and the sound of multiple conversations filled the room. My eyes bounced from one sight to another, admiring the way the Tylers had decorated the restaurant. It was a bit eclectic in style, showcasing a bunch of my favorite pop art pieces.
“What do you serve?” I asked when we reached the hostess station. I stopped short when I saw the pretty brunette grinning widely at Jesse. Her hair was wrapped up in a tight little bun, making her look like a prima ballerina.
“Jesse!” She immediately ran out from behind the table and threw her arms around his neck. Her A-line skirt swished back and forth as Jesse placed his hands on her back, returning her hug.
Must be his girlfriend. I felt an inexcusable pinch of sadness watching another woman holding my Jesse.
“Such a hypocrite,” I mumbled under my breath, remembering my near “losing the V-card” moment with Ethan.
Jesse pulled back and nodded his head in greeting. “Hannah.”
Hann
ah’s bright smile faltered a bit when she saw me standing next to Jesse. “Oh! I didn’t realize you had a guest.”
“Hannah, this is one of my best friends in the whole world, Rocky.”
“Rocky?” She blinked in surprise, no doubt imagining a boxer. There was something in her smile I didn’t like that brought me back to the night at the gallery. I was being judged all over again.
“It’s Raquel!” I said a bit louder than intended. I lowered my voice and smiled. “Actually…I mean…only loved ones call me Rocky.”
Loved ones. I threw the term in there to mask the fact that he called me his best friend, but even that didn’t seem like the truth.
“Oh.” She nodded her head. “Um, dining in?”
“No, here on business,” he answered firmly.
I tilted my head up towards him and frowned. “Business?”
“Let’s go.” Jesse once again reached out for me, this time taking my hand in his.
I nodded and followed him without a word, still reeling from the hostess’ evil eye. When we reached a pair of stainless steel double doors, I pulled back with hesitation.
“What’s wrong?” He frowned.
“We can’t go in there!” I hissed.
“Why not?” His brown eyes grew smaller as his smile widened.
“It’s the kitchen! Isn’t that some FDA violation?”
“It’s also my business and I say we’re allowed in.”
“But—”
“My office is inside,” he explained. “Come on.”
With a gulp I allowed myself to be pulled into the kitchen. All around me the staff greeted Jesse with fond looks on their faces and it appeared to me that nobody even realized I was with him.
“Wow, everyone likes you,” I commented.
“Is that a surprise?” He chuckled.
“No, I just mean…” I really didn’t know what I meant.
He stopped right in front of a tiny space in the back of the kitchen which housed a tiny desk and a computer. It looked like a cubby and was about as big as my closet at home. “Come on in.”
Two Outta Three (Two Outta Three #1) Page 14
