I Know Your Every Move

by Diane Ezzard

  “Get the police!” I shouted to her.

  Tussling with Jay, I screamed, “Help me! Help me! Phone the police!” The woman stared blankly at me. There was a scuffle between me and Jay but he was too powerful for me. He lifted me off the ground and threw me into the car. He drove off in a hurry. He looked agitated. I’d lost a shoe in the commotion and I was shaking. We headed up towards Wash Lane. I tried to concentrate on where we went but the shock of the incident was too great and I was deeply concerned about what might happen next.

  I contemplated jumping out, if the car slowed down but Jay glanced at me and it was as if he had read my mind.

  “Don’t even think about it, you slag.” I gave him a dirty look. Jay had this knack of making me cower like a naughty child. I was a quivering wreck. We pulled up outside a terraced house close to the Dicky Bird estate.

  “I hope for your sake you’re gonna do the right thing and behave yourself.” His voice was authoritarian and commanding. I looked up at the house. It was an average sized terraced property but it seemed such an imposing sight. He got out of the car and came and opened the passenger door. I didn’t move.

  “Get out,” he screeched.

  “I don’t want to,” I said. That riled him. His hand went back then across in a well-practised motion, slapping my left cheek with a loud crack. The pain and tingling began to heat up my face.

  “Don’t want to, eh,” he said mockingly, “Well, we’ll see about that.” He grabbed hold of my arm.

  “Get out bitch.” My fight was gone and with the shock of the throbbing hand mark on my face that was still smarting, I reluctantly did as I was told. He jostled me into the building.

  The house was run down. There were no carpets on the floors, just bare floorboards. He told me to go up the stairs into the front bedroom and he shoved me along. The room looked very sparse, just a single bed and a wooden chair. The bed had a metal frame and one of those rose-coloured, old-fashioned candlewick blankets on, a throwback from the sixties. The room smelt damp. There was graffiti on the walls. I felt sure no one could have lived there. Jay sat on the chair which was near the door and I reluctantly perched on the end of the bed.

  “So what are we going to do with you Sophie?” he said menacingly.

  “I don’t like the police interfering in my business.” I forced myself to keep my voice from quivering. I didn’t want him to know I was afraid. He started to throw a torrent of abuse my way but my mind wandered. I had listened to the same things so many times before. I had to listen to the same foul language he’d used, all those years ago. All the put downs came crawling back to infiltrate my brain.

  I remembered what I had been told on my counselling course to take control of the situation, to stand up to bullies. That is easier said than done when it’s someone you are frightened of and who has more strength than you. He was still angry and spitting out venomous comments, trying to grind me down.

  “No one upsets Jay. You’re gonna pay for this, you cow.”

  He continued, “You might as well make yourself comfy, ‘cos you’re not going anywhere.” There was no let up from his evil words and a chill ran through my body as I wondered if I would ever get out of there.

  Time moved on. Jay still ranted on. I refused to listen to his nonsense until he said something that really goaded me.

  “I heard your mother died. She was a slag like you. Got what she deserved,” he smirked.

  At that, I saw red. I filled up with rage and I started thrashing out at first verbally but then I began hitting him.

  “How dare you, you bastard! I’ve had enough of your bullying.” I punched him hard with the weight of my body behind me and he fell off the chair. He became more mad, and we both grappled with each other, fighting. I was no match for him and I resorted to biting and pulling his hair.

  He screamed out, “You bitch,” and he tried to strangle me. I kicked him hard, and he reached into his pocket and pulled out a gun. The sight of the gun stopped me in my tracks. I managed to move to the other end of the room, backing into the corner with him following closely behind. He held the gun to my head. I closed my eyes. In that moment, I thought I was going to die. I opened my eyes just as he took a swing at me so I ducked. He punched the wall making a dent in it. He stared at me wildly.

  “You never learn, do you,” and then a strange thing happened. He sat back down and began to cry. Shaking, I was in total shock mixed with relief.

  “I miss you, Sophie,” he sobbed.

  The adrenaline still pumped through my body as I listened to his words. He talked the same drivel about how badly I treated him and an idea came into my head.

  “Maybe we could try again,” I whispered. I could tell from his face he didn’t believe me but I also saw a hint there that he had doubts. I used my coaxing skills a few more times suggesting that maybe we could get back together but I couldn’t convince him. I was thinking on my feet and plotting ways to get out. I changed my tactics and began pleading with his better nature.

  I lied to him that my dad was ill, and I needed to go home for him as he’d be worried. I tried suggesting the police were on the way as the old lady who watched the abduction would have called them. He ignored everything I put to him. I didn’t know what time it was but a few hours had passed. It went dark outside, and I began to cry which just annoyed Jay. I was conscious that he had a gun so I didn’t want to make him angry.

  In the time I had been held in that room, we had both been through every emotion imaginable. One thing I did know, though, he definitely wasn’t my stalker. I’d asked him questions about Dot so I could check out his reaction. It was obvious he hadn’t seen her for years. Checking out a few more things I was able to tell from his response that he hadn’t been to Manchester in a long time. He didn’t possess any acting skills, so I knew he was being genuine. By now, I was getting really hungry.

  “Jay, we need to eat. Let’s go out and get something.”

  “Ho, ho, ho. Nice try,” he said

  “I’m being serious Jay, I’m starving. Surely you must be hungry.”

  “I don’t need food. So long as I’ve got my fags, I’ll be alright.” I’d noticed he’d left his pack of cigarettes on the ledge and I bided my time and decided I would try to get rid of them. When he wasn’t looking, I grabbed the packet up and threw it out of the window. That upset him. He spat at me and kicked me. He looked out the window and there was a young man walking by.

  “Oy mate,” he shouted.

  “I can’t get out of here, I’m disabled. Can you bring us those cigs up?” I glanced out and saw a man, who was in his twenties, walking along the road. He peered up at the window and Jay pointed to where the packet had dropped.

  “There mate, just fetch ‘em up for us.” The man kept his eyes on the window but picked up the cigarettes.

  “Just fetch them up, the door’s open,” Jay shouted. He turned and held me by the throat, reaching for his gun and holding it to my head.

  “One word out of you and you’re dead,” he whispered right down my ear. Next thing there was a knock on the bedroom door. Jay opened it a fraction, still with the gun dangerously poised aimed at my temple.

  “Thanks, mate.” He snatched the cigarettes back and banged the door closed. He was pleased with himself. There was no way I dared cry out.

  I felt forlorn but was still scheming how to get out. The gun scared me. I was nervous. I thought I would try being nice again.

  When he told me I would be staying the night, I lied “Yes, okay, I’ll stay.” That surprised him. The notion actually made me feel sick, but I used my best efforts to convince him I would forgive him if we could be friends.

  Finally, after being held prisoner in the room for nine hours, I talked Jay into going to the pub. I hadn’t told him I no longer drank. If he’d have known that, I don’t think he’d have believed my wanting to go for a drink. Just then my stomach grumbled so loud, you could have heard it in the next street.

  We got outside
in the cool air and it felt good. He held on to me tightly and I felt a fool with one shoe on. I was still trying to convince him I would be coming back with him. My tone was nothing but friendly. I’d mentioned about bumping into Martin and we actually had a laugh about old times.

  “Shall we get something to eat first?” I asked. I was ravenous. He took a bit of persuading but he agreed we could go to the Chinese takeaway. We walked into the shop. There were three people in front of us. We’d just ordered our food when I made my mind up it was now or never to make my move. I felt safe as there were customers in.

  “Jay, I’m not coming back with you. I’m going to go home.” He’d just paid for our order and he turned and looked at me, glaring. He had a tray of curry and chips in his hand.

  “You bitch, you tricked me,” he cried. His face looked distorted. He started kicking me. My legs gave way, and I sunk to the ground. Next thing I knew, I was covered in the contents of the tray of food. Everyone looked on in shock. The staff began to run up and down behind the counter, speaking in Chinese. Jay ran out of the shop. I cried and hyperventilated as the curry sauce trickled onto my cheeks. Someone called the police and within a few minutes, I was in the back of a patrol car.

  I finally got home at three in the morning. I phoned friends and family from the police station to let them know what happened. The police kept me there for a while trying to convince me to press charges.

  “But you were kidnapped, Sophie, held against your will.” They pushed and cajoled me into making a statement.

  “I don’t care, I don’t want any repercussions. I’m the one who would be living in fear for the rest of my life.” I wasn’t prepared to do that. It was the same old story, but all I wanted to do was get home, have a nice bath and get in bed.

  I didn’t hear from Jay again, nor did I hear any more from the police over the incident. One thing I did know, it definitely wasn’t him who had been stalking me this time.

  Chapter Twenty Seven

  NOW

  I hadn’t seen Cassie for some time but I kept in touch and phoned her once a week to find out how she was doing. She said she had good and bad weeks and I knew that feeling. She told me there were still occasions when she missed Charlie. I was a little concerned she would waver and go back to him. Sadly, lots of women who were victims of domestic violence did. I was grateful I hadn’t been one of them and I hoped so much Cassie wouldn’t be either.

  She was coming towards the end of her allotted time at the refuge so she would soon be looking for her own flat. I promised I’d visit her when she got her own place. She sounded upbeat about that. She said she’d decided to stay around the Burnley area as she had made friends with a couple of the other girls. When I next spoke to her, she seemed so enthused about getting her own flat.

  I said, “I tell you what Cassie, why don’t I come over next week. You can show me the places you’re looking at and I can help you make plans.”

  “Aw, that sounds a great idea, Sophie, thanks for that.” We said our goodbyes and as I ended the call, I was relieved she was getting on her feet and moving forward with her life.

  I got in that night feeling tired. As much as I didn’t want to become a recluse, if I didn’t have work, I knew I’d feel really lonely. I kept telling myself I needed to contact Angela and my other friends more but the reality was it felt such an effort. I couldn’t wait to get home from work each night and put my feet up. I felt nervous these days when I was out and about and my home was my sanctuary.

  Even though the stalker knew where I lived, which caused me nagging doubts for my safety, I’d secure the property well. I’d had extra locks fitted on the doors and windows. I considered installing CCTV but thought it was too expensive. I also wondered about getting a dog but I wasn’t sure how Max would take to that. I loved sitting with him on my knee as we watched TV together, stroking him and listening to him purr.

  The police were supposed to have upped their presence in the area to keep an eye on me. I wasn’t sure how reliable that was as I hadn’t spotted them. I’d stopped using the landline phone and kept that unplugged. Dad still moaned about the cost of ringing mobiles so I normally phoned him these days. Stress was taking its toll on me and I did consider having time off work but I loved my job and without it, I would have had no sense of purpose. Mind you, I was finding it so tiring. I often came home with a headache and I’d fall asleep after my evening meal.

  Tonight I’d made myself a chilli jacket with salad to eat, one of my favourites. I poured out a nice glass of blackcurrant cordial and smiled. I much preferred the fruity taste of this to wine. The sky had already turned a dark shade of midnight blue so before I sat down to tuck into my food, I switched on my two table lamps. I strolled over to draw the curtains. As I walked across the room and approached the window, an uncomfortable sensation came over me as I gazed out into the dark night. As I glanced down the road, I saw something flicker which made me look again. Was that a dark shadow of a person? I closed the curtains, feeling slightly edgy. I scanned the scene again. Had I been mistaken? No, there was definitely a dark shadow roughly fifty yards away stood by a tree. I turned the lamps back off. If someone was out there, I wanted to watch them without being noticed.

  Slowly, I lifted away the edge of the curtain and peered out. I squinted trying to look out but my eyes didn’t pick anything up. I decided to take a closer look so grabbed my coat and headed for the front door. Was I being foolish? Was this a good idea? Probably not. I stood in the doorway and scanned the road. The figure had disappeared. I walked to the end of the path. A woman in a dark coat and hat walked at pace in the opposite direction but there was no sign of anyone else.

  My heart beat fast. Had they realised I’d spotted them so vanished? I ran up the road to double check but when I got near the tree and stopped, there was definitely no one there. I looked on the ground for clues, thinking I was Miss Marple but I saw nothing. I felt both disappointed and relieved. The hairs on my body stood on end. I didn’t want any more drama, but I was convinced someone had been there. I walked back home, looking over my shoulder constantly.

  My meal was still warm. As I began to tuck in it dawned on me, it might have been the police checking up on me. I’d probably got myself worked up over nothing.

  I decided to go over to Angela’s and get her take on things. A new pair of eyes might add another dimension to my theories. Not that I had any really, but I still thought it was worth a try. The next week I travelled over to see her on Nick’s night out. It was nice just the two of us being able to gossip and talk through things.

  Angela looked over the sink peeling potatoes.

  “You’ll never guess who I bumped into the other day,” She spoke with just the right amount of intrigue in her voice. I was sat at her large wooden kitchen table, glancing at the local Stockport newspaper.

  “No idea,” I said showing a distinct lack of interest.

  “Go on, have a guess.” Angela pushed for a response but I was in no mood for games and shook my head.

  “No, no idea.” Angela looked straight at me as she hit me with the answer.

  “Simon.” She didn’t take her eyes off me and I could tell she was curiously watching my reaction. I hadn’t told her about my chance meeting with him a few months back.

  My heart beat fast. I used my internal powers to remain calm but read the same sentence in the paper three times over.

  “Oh yeah, was he with anyone?” I tried unsuccessfully to keep any interest out of my tone. I kept looking back at the newspaper.

  “He was with his wife.” I knew from Angela’s expression she had seen a flicker of nervousness across my face as I put the newspaper down.

  “Did you speak to him?” I was curious now.

  “Yeah, I mentioned I’d seen you recently. I was going to tell him about our night out but his wife didn’t look too pleased, so I asked him how work was. Apparently, he’s managing the overseas department now.” Angela knew Simon well through her husband,
Nick. Nick trained with Simon and they remained friends, often going out together. My mood changed.

  Feeling irritated, I said, “Oh good for him. I’m sure he’s doing well for himself, building a nice little nest egg for his family.”

  Angela probably detected the hint of sarcasm in my tone.

  “Well, I don’t think he’s doing that well. The pair of them were dressed in biker leathers.” Angela smiled at me.

  “I think that’s his hobby Angela, what he does for pleasure. He always had an interest in motorbikes. He’ll still have his nice shiny Merc on the drive, I’m sure.” She put down the potato peeler and turned to look at me.

  “There’s something else. I’ve just heard on the radio Colin Scanlon has been arrested.”

  “What!” I was shocked.

  “Yeah, I heard he’s been under investigation by the DTI for quite some time.”

  “I can’t believe it.” I wondered if Simon had been implicated in any way.

  “Listen, Sophie, I don’t know exactly what happened with him and Simon but if you knew anything you should say so. There were rumours there were some dodgy dealings going on.” I sat deep in thought. Angela continued, “If you were in on anything, it would be better for you to talk to someone. It’s not as though they could sack you now you’ve left the company.”

  I thought about whether to say what I knew. I wondered how Angela became suspicious and if she did know anything were there others who knew what had taken place. I picked the newspaper up again to try to hide my agitation then promptly put it back on the table.

  “I don’t know what happened, Angela, and it’s best it stays that way.”

  I never enjoyed talking to Angela about Simon because I’d kept my affair with him a secret from her and I’d supposed that must have hurt. I know it would have done if things were the other way round.

  We both gave each other a knowing look. I took a deep sigh and inwardly made a note I needed to make contact with Simon.