Confessions

by Sasha Campbell

  “Thank you. I just dropped in to grab some chips.” He was smiling so hard you would have thought he was auditioning for a toothpaste commercial.

  I leaned against my cart. “How’s your daughter getting along?”

  “Much better. She’s getting around and learning how to write with her left hand.”

  “Good for her.” She had broken her right arm in two places, and lacerated her liver.

  “Just bought that new Jet Li movie. You wanna watch it together?”

  Immediately, I shook my head. “No. That’s not a good idea.”

  He frowned. “What’s wrong with two friends watching a movie together?”

  “Nah…I’ll pass.” He didn’t say anything. He just stood there, his eyes traveling my length appreciatively, and for the first time I felt uncomfortable. “Well, good seeing you. I better get going.” I pushed past him and was halfway down the aisle when I glanced over my shoulder and found him still standing there, watching me.

  While I finished shopping, I kept spotting him somewhere not too far away. When I finally got in line, Kenyon moved in the line beside me. I reached for a magazine and ignored him.

  “You look beautiful as ever.”

  “Thank you,” I replied without even bothering to look his way.

  I couldn’t get out of the store fast enough. Out in the parking lot, I quickly loaded my backseat and was anxious to be long gone before he came out. I put the car in reverse and was backing out of the spot when he tapped on the glass.

  I flinched and rolled down my window. “You scared the shit outta me!”

  “Sorry,” he replied with a sympathetic smirk. “I wasn’t sure if you noticed but you have a flat.”

  “You got to be kidding me.” I put the car in park and climbed out. Sure enough, my left front tire was flat.

  “You must have run over something.” Kenyon slipped out of his blazer and laid it across my front seat, then popped my trunk. I stood back and watched as he reached for the tire iron. “It’s a good thing I was around.” He gave me a silly smirk, then went to work on changing my tire. “You really should reconsider watching the movie with me. I can bring over the popcorn and your favorite wine.” He pulled the flat tire off and examined it. “Look at that…you ran over a nail.” He pulled out the spare and placed the flat tire in my trunk.

  The entire time I stared at his back. Even though I had driven through a new construction area on the way to the store, I had a gut feeling Kenyon was responsible for the flat.

  He glanced over his shoulder. “So you want to watch the movie tonight?”

  “I said no.”

  “Come on, Nikki. Just think about it,” he insisted.

  I gazed down at the tire iron, wanting to smash him across his head. He was never going to change. He had no intentions of moving on. That was now painfully clear. I couldn’t be his friend. No longer could I accept any of his phone calls, because as long as I was in his life he was always going to think he had a chance.

  “There, you’re all set.” He rose and dusted off his slacks.

  “Thanks.” I tossed the jack and tire iron in the trunk and slammed it shut.

  “So, we on for tonight?”

  I swung around. “I said no!”

  He flinched and stepped back as if I had struck him. “Okay, you don’t have to yell.”

  “Yes, I do, because that seems to be the only thing you understand.” I handed him his blazer and climbed into my car.

  Kenyon walked over to my window. “How about we go and get some catfish instead?”

  I backed out of the parking spot, put the car in drive and started to pull off. That fool was still holding on.

  “Wait! Baby, please talk to me. Why do you hate me so much?”

  Ignoring him, I started driving across the lot. Folks were pointing and laughing. “Leave me the fuck alone!” I screamed. He kept holding on, running alongside the car.

  “Baby, please. I love you!”

  I put my foot on the gas and took off faster than allowed in a parking lot. This time he let go. Glancing out my rearview mirror, I watched him standing in the middle of the lot, calling my name.

  40

  Trinette

  I strolled into work feeling like a new woman. Hair and nails done. New spring outfit and shoes. It had been three weeks since Leon had flown down, and I was looking forward to flying to Richmond to spend the upcoming weekend together. I gave everyone a bright smile, then moved to my desk and took a seat. I had a huge caseload for the day and several actions that needed to be taken care of. I had another client who still hadn’t brought me her check stubs. I had no choice but to cut off her stamps. I was preparing to call her when my phone rang.

  “DFS, Trinette speaking.”

  “Hey, beautiful.”

  At the sound of Michael’s voice I rolled my eyes. “What do you want?”

  “I need to see you.”

  “I told you it was over,” I said, trying to whisper.

  “Come on, Netta. One more time for old times’ sake. I’ve got a surprise for you.”

  I wasn’t the least bit curious about his surprise. But I was tired of him calling my house, cell and office phone. “You’ve got to stop calling me.”

  “I will when you come and see me. I promise.”

  I’d been ignoring his calls for weeks because I was trying for once in my life to be faithful to my husband. But this mothafucka, no matter how many times I ignored his phone calls, he kept calling me. I must have fallen on my head when I let his ass con me into giving him my house phone number. Now the fool called me at least three times a week from different numbers. I was starting to worry, because Leon was coming down next month and the last thing I needed was this psycho mothafucka calling my house. There was no telling what he was capable of doing. His wife was only two cubicles away and he was crazy enough to call me.

  I looked over the partition wall to make sure Patricia’s nosy ass wasn’t listening. “Michael, I already told you, I’m trying to be faithful to my husband.”

  “Be faithful tomorrow, I need to see you tonight.”

  “What part of no don’t you understand…the n or the o?”

  “Damn sexy, I got a surprise for you. Something you left at the condo.”

  I couldn’t help it. Now I was curious. “What?”

  “Come and find out.”

  I wasn’t in the mood for games. “I’ll pass.”

  “You dropped one of your diamond earrings at the condo.”

  Oh, shit! The one-carat diamond earrings had belonged to Leon’s mother. I thought I had lost it forever. “I’ll drop by the dealership tomorrow and pick it up.”

  “Please, Trinette, I need some of you,” he whined. “I haven’t had any good pussy in a month.”

  I could believe that.

  “My dick is hard. If I have to pay for some, I will.”

  I thought about this Coach purse I had seen at Macy’s. I also thought about planning a fabulous weekend for Leon and me at a five-star hotel with a Jacuzzi in the room. “How much you willing to pay?”

  “Name your price.”

  “A thousand.”

  “You got it.”

  Damn, I should have asked for two. “What time, and I don’t have all day?”

  “I’ll take whatever I can get. Maureen has aerobics class at seven, so why don’t you meet me then at our spot?”

  There was no way I was meeting him at the condo. I mentioned the first place we met, a low-budget motel off the highway. It was clean but cheap. He agreed.

  I went home, showered, douched, then put on a blue jean skirt and heels. When I pulled into the parking lot shortly after seven, his SUV was already parked in front of room 3B. I knocked twice, then waited. He opened the door and smiled at me with those pretty teeth of his, and I found myself smiling as well. Michael was definitely something to look at. I wished I could say the same about his dick.

  “I’m glad you came.”

  I stepped in
to the room and took a seat on the bed. He moved and took a seat beside me, then leaned in and kissed me. “Damn, girl, you’re fine.”

  I grinned at the compliment. “So, where’s my earring?”

  He rose and moved to the nightstand and handed me a small box. “Open it.”

  Smiling, I felt like a kid on Christmas as I removed the beautiful bow and opened the box. I gasped. Not only was my earring inside but also a matching tennis bracelet. “It’s beautiful.”

  “I saw it and had to buy it for you.”

  I smiled up at him. “Thank you.”

  “Hopefully you’ll change your mind about us. “The next thing I knew his hands were all over me. I pushed his horny ass away, shaking my head.

  “Uh-uh, negro, you know you pay before you play.”

  He looked pissed. “Damn, I thought the bracelet would be enough.”

  “Well, you thought wrong. We already had an agreement.”

  Michael reached inside his pocket and peeled off ten crisp Ben Franklins and handed them to me. I stuck them in my purse, then turned to him. “Now, where were we?”

  He started kissing and petting and taking off his clothes. “Let me get a condom.” He rose from the bed and moved over to his pants.

  I reached for the zipper of my skirt, then suddenly I paused. What in the world was I doing? I had a good-ass man and we were on the verge of having a wonderful life together, and here I was about to jeopardize everything for a thousand dollars.

  By the time Michael had slipped the condom on and was on his way back, I was already putting my shoes back on.

  “Trinette, what’s wrong?”

  “I can’t do it. I love my husband too much.” I reached inside my purse and tossed his money and the bracelet onto the bed.

  “You’re playing, right?” he asked with a chuckle.

  “Do I look like I’m playing?” I swung the purse over my shoulder and moved toward the door. He had the nerve to come after me.

  “You ain’t going nowhere.” He grabbed my arm.

  “Mothafucka, unless you want me to kick you in the nuts and scream rape, I advise you to let my arm go.”

  I guess his naked ass thought twice, because he released me. I swung around. “And if you ever call me again, I’m telling your wife.” I swung open the door and moved across the parking lot to my car, smiling at my decision. I loved my husband more than money. Can you believe that shit? I wasn’t about to jeopardize my marriage for anyone.

  I was almost to my car when I heard tires squeal and spotted a dark vehicle come flying in my direction so fast I had to dive between two cars.

  “What the fuck?” I got up and looked both ways. The driver was long gone, and I barely had a look at the car. It had been traveling way too fast for me to see who was behind the wheel, but one name came to mind. Maureen. Thanks to my advice, she had found out I was screwing her husband.

  41

  Nikki

  “This is Nikki Truth and you’re on the air.”

  “Hello, Ms. Nikki.”

  The male voice sounded vaguely familiar. “Hello, who am I speaking to?”

  “This is Junior.”

  Mr. Loser. Ain’t this some shit. “Well, well, well…long time, no hear. That must have been some woman!” I said with dramatic emphasis.

  “She was…or rather, she still is.” He took a deep breath. “What do you do when you love a woman with all your heart and she doesn’t love you back?”

  I took a moment to think about an answer. “You open up your heart to that person, and if they don’t love you back, then you find the strength to move on. There is someone out there for everyone, and if she doesn’t feel the same way, then maybe the two of you aren’t meant to be together.”

  “I don’t agree. We fit so good together. I love her with everything I have, and if her husband wasn’t standing in the way, we would have been perfect together, I know we would.”

  Oh, my God! I choked on my spit. Nobody talks like that but…“Kenyon, is that you?”

  There was silence on the air, and then I heard that eerie laugh. “Yes, baby, it’s me.”

  It took everything I had not to cuss him out over the air. “I thought you said your name was Junior?”

  Suddenly his voice changed to the one I had grown accustomed to hearing. “I am a junior. I’m named after my father.” He started laughing as if it were the funniest thing in the world. “I just didn’t want everybody in my business.”

  I looked across the glass at Tristan, who was up out of his chair with his hand cupping his mouth, eyes bugging out of his head. I was on the air, and there was no way I was about to fall apart. I just needed to hold it together and play along.

  “Junior…did you say she’s married?”

  “Yes, but she isn’t happy with him,” he replied. I was surprised he was playing along with me.

  “You knew when you first got involved with a married woman, chances were the relationship couldn’t be anything but temporary.” I was so pissed I could have screamed, but this was probably my last chance at talking sense to this dude.

  “B-but she wasn’t happy. Now that he’s back from the war he’s got her mind all confused and she’s feeling guilty about no longer loving him.”

  This dude was crazier than I thought. “Did she tell you she loved her husband?”

  “Yes, b-but I know s-she loves me.” Kenyon always stutters when he gets nervous.

  “Yes, maybe she does, but it sounds to me like she loves her husband more. I’m assuming the two of you got involved while her husband was over in Iraq, is that correct?”

  His voice softened. “Yes, and we fell in love.”

  “But what did she tell you?”

  He released a heavy sigh. “That she owed it to her husband and her marriage to try.”

  “And why can’t you respect that?”

  “B-because I know s-she’s confused.”

  “Doesn’t sound like she’s confused to me. Instead it sounds like you refuse to accept that our…I mean, your relationship is over.”

  “I believe in fighting for what is mine!”

  “But she isn’t yours. Legally she belongs to another man. There’s a saying—let her go and if she’s yours, she’ll come back to you.”

  “Wow! My mother told me the same thing.”

  Damn, that fool’s mama is dead. “Then you need to listen to her. Marriage is a sacred union. Are you a Christian?”

  “Yes. I’ve been praying to the Lord.”

  “Then you know what she’s doing is right. How about praying to the Lord to give you the strength to move on?”

  “Because she’s mine!”

  “If she’s married, she was never yours in the first place.”

  “There’s nothing wrong with having hope.”

  “Then keep hope alive.” I hung up. “Sorry, but that’s one brotha who refuses to believe it over. We’re about to take a commercial break, and when we get back we’re gonna switch gears and discuss why women mess with married men.”

  I took the headset off and was clearly shaking. I had been involved with Mr. Loser. Kenyon Monroe and Mr. Loser were one and the same. It was so crazy I started laughing. Many times I had said, what woman in her right mind would want to date that dude? And now I was one of those women. By the time Tristan had come to my office, I had tears in my eyes.

  “Are you okay?”

  Shaking my head, I reached for a tissue. “Hell, nah, I’m not okay.”

  Tristan took a seat beside me, eyes bugged out. “Oh, my goodness, girl. You were dating that loser.”

  I took a few seconds to think about it, then took one look at Tristan. The two of us exploded with laughter. What could possibly happen next?

  42

  Trinette

  “Well, what do you think?”

  I looked at Leon totally in shock. “What I think is…I’ve got to be dreaming.”

  I stood in the living room of a forty-two-hundred square foot home with twelve
-foot ceilings, a spiral staircase and more room than my current furniture would fill.

  “I love it!” I threw myself into his arms. “Thank you so much.”

  Leon kissed me, then stared down in my eyes. “You’re my wife, and there isn’t anything I wouldn’t do for you. All I ask is you love me in return.”

  I started crying. I couldn’t help it. I didn’t deserve this man. I knew that now. “I still can’t believe I almost lost you.”

  “You got me now.”

  What he did next made my jaw drop. Leon got down on one knee and reached for my hand.

  “Leon…w-what are you doing?”

  He grinned. “What does it look like I’m doing? I’m getting ready to propose to your sexy behind, again. Now hush.”

  It took everything I had to hold it together when he began to speak.

  “Netta, I knew from the first time I set eyes on you, you would be the woman I would spend the rest of my life with. And nothing has changed. My heart still beats heavily every time you’re around. My body craves your touch when you’re gone. My life isn’t complete without you in it, and you would make me the happiest man in the world if you would marry me again.”

  I was bawling because I was so happy. I had almost lost this man until God had given me a second chance, and there was no way in hell I was going to ever take him for granted again. Trust and believe. “Yes, yes, I wanna marry you again.”

  He rose and dipped down and captured me in a kiss. It was by far the best I’d ever had. I held on tight and didn’t want to let him go. There was no telling how long we would have stood there kissing if we hadn’t heard someone clear her throat. I turned around.

  “I’m sorry to interrupt, but does that mean you decided to take the house?”

  I looked from the realtor to my husband and started laughing. I forgot she was even there. I nodded. “Yes, we’ll take it.”

  We spent a fabulous weekend together, and on Monday I climbed out my car with the biggest smile on my face. Who could believe marriage could be so grand? After putting an offer on the house, Leon took me to a fabulous Thai restaurant where we had spicy noodles and meat, then we spent the evening in bed hugging and holding each other and simply talking. It was amazing how much the two of us had to talk about. Eight years’ worth.