Freak Show (Alexa O'Brien Huntress Book 7)

by Lee, Trina M.

  The intensity in his gaze rocked me. There was such vehemence in his words. A spark of anger lit up his brilliant eyes, and I watched as they bled to wolf.

  “I don’t deserve you,” I said softly.

  “You know there’s no way in hell they would have pulled that shit if I’d been around to put a stop to it. Things have changed so much since Raoul died.” Shaz stared longingly out the window to the field and forest beyond Kylarai’s backyard.

  It had been very different when Raoul led the pack. He was a strong leader who was always willing to do what was best for the wolves in his pack. Except for me, I guess. Our relationship had been warped by the history he’d shared with my mother. Too bad I hadn’t known that until after he died.

  In the year or more since his passing, I had changed and so had the town wolves. They knew I was bonded to a vampire, one they all saw as a threat. Being spurned by them had stung, but ultimately, it had meant very little. They didn’t really know a damn thing about me.

  “Let’s go. I’ve been waiting impatiently for this all day.” Shaz led me outside, down the patio steps to the grass that was beginning to yellow with the promise of summer’s end.

  A smile tugged at my lips as a memory surfaced. Shaz and Arys had really gone at it out here. While beating the hell out of one another, they’d torn the wooden railing off in a tumble down the stairs.

  Noticing my reminiscent expression, Shaz chuckled. “I’d like to think I would have won that fight. If Kylarai hadn’t broken it up.”

  “You guys have come a long way,” I replied. “I’m impressed.”

  “Yeah, well…there’s a lot you don’t see.”

  “What is that supposed to mean?”

  He used disrobing as a means of distraction. “Nothing at all.”

  Slowly, Shaz peeled off his t-shirt and hung it on the railing. He’d bulked up during his extended time as wolf in the mountains. His firm physique rippled with hard muscles that demanded my attention. It was impossible to resist running my hands over his chest, down his stomach.

  “Hey, guys, save it for the forest,” Kylarai called from across the yard. “No hanky-panky in the yard.”

  “You heard the lady,” Shaz said, playfully pushing me away. “Hands off.”

  When he dropped his pants next, I was in a hurry to join him. I disrobed fast, feeling the exhilarating rush of my wolf rising to the surface.

  “Are you coming?” I asked Ky and Coby, noting that everyone else had made their way across the field toward the tree line.

  “Sure,” Coby said with a mischievous grin. “We’ll be right behind you.”

  My hungry gaze wandered over Shaz. My wolf couldn’t have been happier to be there with her mate. Something had changed in him while he was away. It was more than merely his physique. There was a new understanding in him and a newfound aggression that was courageous but not careless.

  I knew damn well that he and Arys discussed me when I was not around. I couldn’t fault them for it either. Still, I wondered what it was that initiated the change in Shaz.

  Before I could reach for him again, Shaz darted away and dropped to his knees, becoming wolf before touching the ground. He playfully nipped at my ankles and smacked me with his tail.

  “I’ll give you a head start,” I said, nodding toward the tree line.

  He didn’t have to be told twice. Turning tail, he fled from the yard and into the night. It was an old game for us, racing to a particular tree on the edge of the forest. I was the reigning champion. It had been a long time since we’d raced and just been wolf with the others.

  Embracing the change was like opening a floodgate. The wolf rose up, bursting forth, freed from its human prison. My body reknit and reformed, a sensation that hurt for just a second before it was replaced by the satisfying release, like that of having a good stretch.

  Leaving Coby and Ky behind, I raced after the shock of white fur in the distance. No, I could most definitely never live in Las Vegas. The desert may have been the home of my vampiric origins, but it was foreign land to my wolf. First and foremost, I would always be wolf. The black onyx amulet hung around my neck, bouncing gently against my chest as I ran. Brogan had said to wear it, and I feared taking it off for even a minute.

  Shaz was bigger and faster, but he didn’t have my desire to win. The dirt kicked up beneath my feet as I flew across the field with the forest in my sights. Running on two legs never felt as good or as natural since I’d become wolf. This was what I was meant to be. I would not lose it. I caught up to Shaz easily and was ready to overtake him. Instead, I hung back and let him have the win.

  He turned to me with accusation in his eyes. Then he jumped on me, knocking me to the ground beneath of flurry of playful bites and nips. He knew I had let him win.

  Running in the forest always gave me this deep-seated longing, this need to be there always. And like other times when the vampire world had become too much, I considered staying there among the trees, with those who called the forest home.

  If only it could be so simple.

  The forest was alive with the sound of wolves, raising their melodious voices to the sky. There was no sound like it. It banished my insecurity. I didn’t have to belong to this pack to know that I was every bit as much a wolf as they were.

  I followed Shaz as he bounded through the brush and thick patches of trees, tracking various scents that caught his attention. The hoot of an owl drew my eye to a large tree branch overhead. The majestic bird stared down at me. It was a special moment in time, not my first encounter with a bird of prey and hopefully not my last. We shared an acknowledgment of one another, an unspoken respect.

  I trotted off, thinking about how nature was superior to both humans and vampires. Here in the wild, we recognized each other, and we all knew our roles. It was peaceful. And if I could use anything in my life just then, it was peace.

  When I found Shaz, he was having a stare down with a frightened rabbit. The little thing was quivering in fright, frozen solid, eyes wide with fear. Shaz moved slowly, lying down in the faded grass. After several moments, the rabbit broke from its position and fled down a nearby hole in the ground.

  My heart skipped a beat. I went to Shaz and nuzzled him with wolf kisses. He was still the sweetest man I knew, and yet, he was also a killer, ready to take on anyone, man, wolf or vampire, if it was the right thing to do.

  Eventually we made our way to the clearing. It was a place among the trees that the pack used as a meeting point. Shaz raised his muzzle and howled. The sound shook me. There was nothing more heart wrenching. His cry was echoed by the pack. One by one, they began to arrive in the clearing, forming a circle around us. He was calling them to us, and upon realizing that, my nerves began to take hold. What was he doing?

  When everyone was gathered, Shaz shifted back to human form. Standing in the center of the circle of beasts, he made eye contact with them each in turn.

  I remained as wolf, slinking out of the center, doing my best to blend in with the others. He was the Alpha here with Kylarai, should she choose to keep the position of Alpha female. I had no authority here now.

  “I’ve gathered you all here together for a reason,” Shaz began when all the wolves were settled. “To begin, I’d like to congratulate Coby and Kylarai on their engagement. We all wish you both the best. Know that this is your family, and we love you. Always.”

  The wolves made a bunch of noise, yips and howls, proclaiming their agreement. Kylarai and Coby stood together, two brown wolves that couldn’t stop gazing longingly at each other.

  When the noise died down, Shaz continued, “As you all know, I’ve recently returned from spending some time away. During that time, I’ve come to realize many things. One of those things is that I can no longer be the Alpha of this pack.”

  This announcement was met with much shock and confusion. Holding up a hand for silence, Shaz held a hand out to Ky and Coby. “Kylarai is your current Alpha female. I would like to hand the Alpha ma
le title over to Coby. If anyone has a problem with that, come forward now or forever keep your silence.”

  I tensed, hopeful that nobody would dare to defy Shaz’s wish. As it was, the small town pack was composed of everyday types, teachers, lawyers, soccer moms. Nobody moved.

  We all stared at Shaz. I couldn’t believe he was walking out on them. Something had changed in him. I saw it in Vegas when he killed in Jenner’s death fight. I was still trying to decide if I should be worried about his easy acceptance of that situation.

  Satisfied that nobody dared to challenge Coby as the new Alpha, he beckoned both wolves forward. “My place is no longer here with you all. I belong with Alexa. Most of you don’t really understand who she is, you only see what she is.” He paused, allowing that to sink in. “Welcome your new Alpha couple. And obey them always. They’ll take care of you.”

  He backed out of the center of the circle, gesturing for Coby and Kylarai to take his place there. They did so with some hesitation. They were evidently as surprised by this announcement as the rest of us.

  The pack raised their voices in tribute to their new leaders. I joined them, happy to see Kylarai take on the leadership role I knew she’d been born for. This was for the best. Neither I nor Shaz could bring trouble to them if we were no longer part of them. Still, I felt bad for Shaz. He deserved to have a pack to call his own.

  Resuming his wolf form, Shaz nudged my flank and bounded into the trees. I followed, dying to ask him a dozen questions. We went a good mile or more from the others, stopping only after their voices had faded in the distance.

  Certain that we were alone, I shifted, needing a human voice. At my request, he followed suit.

  “Why didn’t you tell me you were going to do that?” I demanded. The ground was cold under my feet. A twig poked into my heel, but I barely noticed.

  “So you could try to talk me out of it?” He asked with a chuckle. “No way. I know you, Lex.”

  “But, why? You fought for that pack. They’re yours.”

  “Not anymore. I needed to do it. My place is with you.” He placed a finger on my lips, muffling my protests. “We need to make contact with the city wolves. You need to reach out to them, and I’ll be by your side when you do it.”

  “It’s not going to be that simple.” I pushed his hand away but held it tight.

  “Nothing ever is.”

  “Being with me means being in the world of vampires.”

  “It always has. You’ve never been just a wolf, Alexa. I’ve always accepted that.”

  What more could I say? Shaz had made his choice. He knew what he risked. There was no point in arguing or begging him to change his mind. So I did the only thing I could. I kissed him.

  His tongue slipped between my lips, delving hungrily into my mouth. This time when I ran my hands over him, he didn’t push me away.

  Passion and instinct drove us to the forest floor. I couldn’t get enough of the way he felt. My hand closed around his shaft, and I was pleased to find him already hard for me. His soft moan encouraged me as I stroked him. We lay together, surrounded by nature while love and desire consumed us. His mouth was hot on my neck and chest as he licked and nipped my sensitive flesh.

  I needed to have him, here in the forest, where we belonged. Unlike our last encounter, I was not the aggressor. There was no bloodlust present within me nor did I see him as prey. Instead, I wanted him to claim me.

  Shaz didn’t need my submission. Already he was taking a dominant stance, reaching between my thighs to slide his fingers inside me. His mouth claimed my nipple while his fingers worked magic. Deciding I was ready for him, Shaz nudged my legs apart. He entered me with a slick thrust. That first stroke was my favorite. Having him inside me brought a happy sigh to my lips.

  It had been so long since we’d made love like this, under the stars. We moved together, our pace frenzied but tender. Claws and fangs gave an aggressive edge to the carnal act, but there was genuine emotion behind every touch, every kiss and bite.

  The masculine scent of him was mouthwatering. All I could taste, breathe and feel was Shaz. I was a willing slave to the passion that consumed us.

  Face to face, we gazed into one another. My breath came faster, and my heart pounded in my ears. The cool night air was a soothing caress on my sweaty skin. My white wolf possessed my body, making it his in every way. We had both needed this moment.

  Learning to live in the moment was starting to come easier. My future might have been predestined in many ways, such as my link to Arys or being a Hound of God. However, I knew that nothing was written in stone. Things could always change. We all had choices to make that would alter what came next.

  Choosing to embrace it all, good and bad, risks and benefits, I was determined to move forward bravely. I was tired of being afraid, tired of expecting the worst. I had a job to do, and I was going to see it through. Even if it killed me.

  Shaz’s devotion would never cease to surprise me. In recent days, he seemed more sure of our role together than I ever had. He had always been the balance I needed, the one who kept me from being consumed by Arys’s darkness. Maybe it wouldn’t always be so, but I would never forget the lengths he was willing to go to for me.

  Being there in his arms, gazing up into his fabulous green eyes, I was able to submit myself to whatever lay ahead. I found strength in those who loved me, my friends and family. Their willingness to back me, regardless of what that meant, was more than I would ever deserve. And I cherished it. I would do anything for any one of them. We were stronger together.

  Still, I knew deep in my heart that when push came to shove, I would have to walk this dark path alone.

  Epilogue

  A loud clatter followed by a bang had me cringing. The last of the old furniture and tables were being hauled out of The Wicked Kiss. I was happier than I thought I’d be to see them go.

  I had wasted no time in following through with my plans to renovate. Whatever had gone on here in my absence was still a mystery to me. Kale and Willow seemed to be the only ones to know the exact story, and neither of them was talking.

  I snuck a sidelong glance at Willow who sat perched on a barstool beside me, watching the vampires on my staff tear apart my nightclub. In his hand was a tequila, like usual. I would never understand how he could drink that awful swill.

  “Still not talking, huh?” I teased, knowing he wouldn’t spill Kale’s secret.

  “There’s nothing to talk about. I promise.” He ducked his dirty-blond head to hide a grin. “So, tell me what you plan to do about Jenner and the Vegas club.”

  While we watched the loud and sometimes destructive activity in the club, I had filled him in on the details of my trip. I had also told him about the dream I had a few nights ago. Even Arys and Shaz didn’t know about that. Not yet.

  “Vegas is Arys’s problem right now,” I said, frowning into my whiskey glass. “I have enough to deal with here. How the hell can I run two cities when I have yet to run one? And who knows? I might be dead soon. Then neither city will be my problem.”

  Willow’s silver wings were absent from sight though I could almost hear them rustle as he shifted on his stool. He gave me a look I was starting to know well. It meant he was about to get serious on me.

  “You think the dream means you’re going to die soon?” He asked, his tone gentle and warm. “Dreams are open to interpretation. They can mean almost anything. Try not to read too much into it.”

  Falon’s words haunted me every time I gazed into the dark gold liquor in my glass. He represented everything I feared and loathed. Being one of Shya’s minions didn’t appeal to me. I would rather truly be dead than enslaved to a demon.

  The dragon on my forearm itched and burned, as if aware of my thoughts. More than once, I had toyed with the thought of digging it out of my flesh with a claw. The only thing stopping me was knowing that Shya would make me pay for it. He had still not shown up unexpectedly nor had he continued to call. It was starting to m
ake me nervous. I wished he would just get it over with already.

  Since returning from Las Vegas, I felt like I was stuck in some kind of limbo. Waiting for something to happen was not my strong suit. I’d rather make things happen. In this case, my hands were tied. I could do nothing until Shya made the first move. Then I could only react and hope that it was enough.

  Of course, there were other things to keep me busy. I had no intention of remaining idle. Shya was seeking something, a scroll. It went without saying that I would be wise to seek it as well. Seeing as the bastard planned to use my death to open the seal barring it, I had as much reason to desire its location as he did.

  “I don’t think I’m jumping to the wrong conclusion, Willow. I can feel it. It’s going to happen soon.” I took a deep breath and blurted, “I’m scared.”

  It was a confession I don’t think I would have made to anyone else. Arys had a way of knowing my feelings due to our bond, but even he did not know my every thought. An admission of fear felt like an admission of weakness. I detested it.

  Willow scooted his stool closer so he could put a friendly arm around my shoulders and pull me in against him. His touch was comforting like a warm blanket on a rainy day.

  “I know,” he said, resting his head against mine. “It’s ok to be scared, Alexa. It means you still feel something. You still care. It’s a good thing.”

  “Doesn’t feel too damn good.”

  There was another crash as a broken table came apart on its way out the door. It would be a relief when this was done. I planned to keep the club operating during renovations, which would prove difficult but had to be done. It would have been nice if Kale had been here to help oversee things. Wherever he was, I probably didn’t want to know.

  He too had been keeping his distance. That was likely for the best. There were only so many ways and so many times I could apologize for taking Shya’s mark to save him. I would never be sorry for saving him, no matter how hard Kale tried to make me regret that choice.