by Gary Paulsen
Backstage. You do not even want to know what happened after the musical last month. Thought we’d cleaned everything up. Guess not.
JORDAN
Now that we all know the stuffed cat belongs to you, are you going to leave him at home?
AVERY
Probably just get a bigger bag.
JORDAN
That’s what I figured.
REGAN
I love when stuff works out so I look like the really cool person with all the answers. (pauses to reflect) It happens a lot, but it never gets old.
MASON
That’s very chummy for you three and, no doubt, in the best interests of the entire school. But Taylor and I have a book report to finish. Taylor, you have one last paragraph to write and then you’re done. Then, today, when your mother asks you what you did today, you can say, “Spared Mason from dying of frustration and boredom by finishing my homework assignment.” She’ll be so proud.
REGAN
What about you, Mase? What are you going to tell your mom about what you and your friends did today?
MASON
She would never ask that. Because she knows that I don’t have friends. I have well-connected contacts. And influential references. And helpful associates. And challenging academic colleagues.
TAYLOR
Nah. That’s not all. You have friends.
MASON
Right. You want me to believe that you actually stopped to think about whether or not I have a big enough social circle?
TAYLOR
(clears throat and very carefully recites the following list): Two, three, five, seven, eleven, thirteen, seventeen, nineteen, and twenty-three.
AVERY
Cool! First Devon tunes out and has a little concert going on in the corner. Then Jordan turns into a human punch-line generator. Now Taylor’s become a number-spewing savant. You cannot tell me there isn’t something really unique in the air at this school. Even my parents would not believe weirder things could happen.
MASON
(smiles, confused, impressed, uncertain): No. That’s not it; those are prime numbers. Taylor just listed prime numbers. (facing TAYLOR) You have been paying attention when we work together.
TAYLOR
Not only is it hard to tune someone like you out, but (clears throat and takes a deep breath) concomitant with your mistaken belief that I’m not nearly as bright as you are, is the insulting way you have ignored the fact that I am ideal friend material.
AVERY
What did Taylor just say?
REGAN
Is that still Taylor?
JORDAN
Shhhhh. I want to hear Taylor explain why it was a good idea to play dumb just to cozy up to Mason.
MASON
You pretended to be stupid so I’d tutor you?
TAYLOR
Don’t flatter yourself; I was struggling—a bit—to catch up after I had mono last term and I needed some help. For a while. A little while. But then I kind of liked hanging out with you; you’re not so bad for an antisocial intellectual snob who doesn’t have time for amigos.
MASON
You have a weird way about you.
TAYLOR
Anyone can make a friend the old-fashioned way, “hey, we have a lot in common and get along, wanna hang out and watch TV?” Boring. My way showed . . .
MASON
(jumps in and finishes the sentence with TAYLOR): Panache.
SOUND CUE #4: LOUDSPEAKER ANNOUNCEMENT: Attention! The storm warnings have been lifted for this entire area. The weather is clear and it is now safe to leave your secure area. Thank you for your cooperation.
DEVON
(steps forward and comes all the way downstage, facing the audience, slips the air guitar strap off, holds it high in the air, and takes a huge bow): Thank you. Thank you very much. We hope you enjoyed our music. The band and I had a blast. You’re a great audience. Rock on! We love you. See you next time. Drive home safely! Good night!
CURTAIN FALLS
GARY PAULSEN is one of the most honored writers of contemporary literature for young readers, author of three Newbery Honor titles, Dogsong, Hatchet, and The Winter Room. He has written more than two hundred books for adults and young readers. He divides his time between New Mexico, Alaska, and on the Pacific.
Simon & Schuster Books for Young Readers
Simon & Schuster • New York
Visit us at
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authors.simonandschuster.com/Gary-Paulsen
Also by Gary Paulsen
Dancing Carl
Dogsong
Hatchet
Sentries
Shelf Life: Stories by the Book
This Side of Wild
Tracker
Woodsong
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SIMON & SCHUSTER BOOKS FOR YOUNG READERS
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This book is a work of fiction. Any references to historical events, real people, or real places are used fictitiously. Other names, characters, places, and events are products of the author’s imagination, and any resemblance to actual events or places or persons, living or dead, is entirely coincidental.
Text copyright © 2016 by Gary Paulsen
Jacket illustrations copyright © 2016 by Thinkstock
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Jacket design by Krista Vossen
Interior design Hilary Zarycky
The text for this book is set in ITC New Baskerville.
Library of Congress Cataloging-in-Publication Data
Names: Paulsen, Gary.
Title: Six kids and a stuffed cat / Gary Paulsen.
Description: First edition. | New York : Simon & Schuster Books for Young Readers, [2016] | Summary: Six misfits get stuck together in a middle school restroom and discover friendship. Includes playscript of the story.
Identifiers: LCCN 2015026692| ISBN 9781481452236 (hardback) | ISBN 9781481452243 (paperback) | ISBN 9781481452250 (ebook)
Subjects: | CYAC: Middle schools—Fiction. | Schools—Fiction. | Friendship—Fiction. | Humorous stories. | BISAC: JUVENILE FICTION / Humorous Stories. | JUVENILE FICTION / Social Issues / Friendship. | JUVENILE FICTION / Animals / Cats.
Classification: LCC PZ7.P2843 Si 2016 | DDC [Fic]—dc23
LC record available at http://lccn.loc.gov/2015026692