Whimsy and Woe

by Rebecca McRitchie

  Woe pulled out the My Lunch With Mermaids poster and studied the silhouettes once more. Despite what George had told them, they were still no closer to finding the travelling troupe.

  They sat in silence for a while until Woe changed the subject. ‘We need to get our sea legs,’ he said. Then he stood up and walked around the deck hesitantly. Suddenly the boat dipped in the water and he had to grab onto the side quickly or risk falling overboard.

  Whimsy laughed.

  Looking down, Woe saw something written on the side of the boat.

  ‘Whimsy,’ he said, concerned. She walked over to the side of the boat more gracefully than her brother and peered over the edge. Written across it in yellow, sloppy letters was the boat’s name: The Sinker III.

  38

  In which Whimsy and Woe hold onto their dancin’ shoes

  ‘Oh, don’t worry about that,’ called out a gruff voice from behind them. Jeremiah stood outside the wheelhouse looking down at them. ‘She’s only sunk twice! She’s as safe as houses.’

  A now much more nervous Whimsy and Woe looked at each other.

  ‘It’s gettin’ dark. Yer best come up.’

  At one end of the wheelhouse was a large lounge and table, and at the other a single chair placed behind the steering wheel, which is where Jeremiah sat watching them.

  ‘So what are yer names?’ he asked after a while.

  ‘I’m Woe Mordaunt and this is my sister, Whimsy,’ said Woe sitting down on the lounge opposite the captain. Whimsy took a seat next to her brother.

  ‘I’m Jeremiah, but I s’pose yer know that already. How do yer know Harold?’

  ‘He helped us on the train,’ said Whimsy, not wanting to reveal too much about their lack of tickets or her performance on the train.

  Jeremiah nodded. ‘And why’d yer want to leave Cleeth Bay in such a hurry?’

  ‘Well . . .’ started Whimsy.

  ‘We’re on an adventure,’ said Woe, borrowing Constance’s words.

  ‘An adventure!’ said Jeremiah his eyebrows raised. ‘Well, why didn’t yer say so? Adventure is what I was goin’ to name this boat . . . until it sunk. What’s yer adventure?’

  ‘Our parents are thespians and they were kidnapped . . .’ said Whimsy.

  ‘And we’re trying to find them,’ finished Woe.

  Jeremiah looked unfazed. ‘I can tell yer a scarier story than that,’ he said bluntly.

  ‘A scarier story than our parents being kidnapped?’ asked Woe disbelievingly. It’s probably sea-related, he thought.

  ‘Yup,’ said the captain confidently. ‘It’s the reason why I don’t have any hair.’ He pointed to the top of his bare head with his pipe.

  ‘What’s it about?’ asked Whimsy, excited to hear a story so scary that it made someone lose their hair. She touched hers worriedly.

  Leaning forward, Jeremiah whispered to her, ‘It’s about a sea monster.’

  I knew it, Woe thought.

  ‘What kind of sea monster?’ asked Whimsy, already captivated.

  ‘A sea monster,’ Jeremiah continued, ‘so monstrous and so feared that it goes by many names. Fishermen call it The Beast because of its great size. Sailors call it The Quick because of its speed. Land folk call it The Roar because they can hear its roar from the land. But they all say that it comes from a foul place. A place you can only get to at the bottom of the sea.’

  ‘How did The Beast make you lose your hair?’ Woe asked, now captivated too.

  ‘I saw it,’ said Jeremiah. ‘When this ship sunk the first time, I went down with it. And while I was under, it was there too. Looking at me.’ Jeremiah outwardly shuddered.

  ‘What did it look like?’ asked Whimsy.

  ‘It had sharp teeth that hung out of its mouth and fins that were long like arms, a tail to match and huge glowing eyes. I swam away from it as fast as I could and when I broke the surface, my hair was . . . gone.’

  ‘Someone should write a book or a play about The Beast,’ said Whimsy trying to picture the sea monster in her mind.

  Jeremiah outwardly cringed. ‘Books are dangerous things,’ he said.

  ‘Dangerous?’ Woe questioned. ‘The ideas inside them?’

  ‘No. They’re very pointy. Imagine the paper cuts.’

  They sat in silence. Outside the wheelhouse, the sun had well and truly set. A squeak broke the quiet.

  ‘Yer pocket just squeaked,’ said Jeremiah curiously.

  Whimsy pulled Eloise from her pocket and handed her to Jeremiah. His eyes lit up as Eloise scurried from his palm, up his arm and to his shoulder.

  ‘Jeremiah, meet Eloise,’ said Woe.

  ‘She can be my first mate,’ said the captain happily. ‘So, yer parents are thespians, yer said?’

  ‘Actors. In plays and musicals,’ said Woe, explaining.

  ‘Singin’ and dancin’?’ asked Jeremiah moving his arms awkwardly from side to side to show someone dancing.

  The siblings smiled, nodding.

  ‘Sing me somethin’,’ he said, motioning to Whimsy and Woe to stand.

  ‘What?’ asked Woe.

  ‘Go on, yer parents must’ve taught yer something. We don’t get much singin’ and dancin’ out here on the high seas, do we, Eloise?’

  Like acting, they knew the basics, of course, but Whimsy and Woe had never been asked to sing for someone before, let alone for a captain in the middle of the sea. Standing, Woe started to sing the first song that came to mind, one he hadn’t heard since leaving the Idle Slug. Whimsy followed his lead, smiling proudly at her brother’s choice of song:

  ‘Fish are friends too,

  Fish are friends too.

  From me to you,

  And you to me,

  Fish are friends too.

  ‘Fish are friends too,

  Fish are friends too.

  Not one or two,

  To cook or stew,

  Fish are friends too.’

  Then suddenly the boat swayed heavily to the right, causing Whimsy and Woe to lose their balance and fall to the floor. In seconds, the wind outside became a howl and rain lashed against the windows. From their place on the floor, Whimsy and Woe heard Jeremiah laughing.

  ‘Hold onto yer dancin’ shoes,’ he called over his shoulder. ‘We’ve sailed into a storm!’

  39

  In which The Sinker III starts sinking

  ‘U h-oh,’ said Jeremiah looking out of the wheelhouse window.

  ‘Uh-oh?’ repeated Woe. He made his way carefully across the wheelhouse to stand behind the captain. Jeremiah tried to control the boat in the now very rough sea. At once, Woe saw what Jeremiah was uh-oh-ing about. The wind outside had become stronger and waves were crashing against the bow, filling the deck with water. Quickly.

  ‘What do we do?’ asked Woe, trying not to panic.

  Whimsy moved to stand behind her brother. She saw the watery deck below. ‘Uh-oh,’ she repeated.

  ‘Yer both gonna have to go out there,’ said Jeremiah.

  ‘What?’ exclaimed Whimsy and Woe at the same time.

  ‘Take these,’ he said throwing them a yellow raincoat each.

  ‘And a life jacket?’ asked Whimsy, worried that a raincoat might not be the most useful attire in a storm at sea.

  ‘Don’t believe in ’em,’ said Jeremiah. ‘Grab them buckets.’ He pointed to two buckets in the corner of the wheelhouse. ‘I’ll try to keep the boat steady.’

  Whimsy and Woe were wide-eyed. Was Jeremiah serious? Were they really going to go out into that? They jumped slightly as waves crashed against the side of the wheelhouse.

  ‘If we don’t get rid of the water on deck, I’ll be changing the name of this boat to The Sinker IV,’ Jeremiah said.

  Grabbing their courage, Whimsy and Woe stepped out of the wheelhouse. The cold wind and rain hit them like a wave. The force of it almost knocked them both over. Carefully, they made their way to the front of the boat. The water on the deck reached their knees. There were floating crates and fis
hing equipment all around them. Woe pushed aside a large net that drifted towards him. ‘Watch your step,’ he called back to his sister through the rain.

  Whimsy heard her brother say something but she was too busy trying to watch where she stepped. She pushed a fishing rod out of her path and wondered if they would have sailed into a storm on their houseboat holiday with their parents.

  As fast as they could, Whimsy and Woe filled their buckets with the water from the deck, emptying each one over the side of the boat. The boat dipped and crashed into the waves around them as they continued to scoop and throw the water out over and over again.

  Minutes passed and to Woe, it didn’t seem like their efforts were making much of a difference. The rain and waves just kept coming and the bow of the boat remained full of water. Rain and waves lashed at them from all sides. Woe thought of what their parents would say if they knew they were outside in a storm at sea. He scooped and tipped faster.

  As Whimsy waded through the water on deck, scooping and tipping, she couldn’t help but imagine The Beast out there somewhere, swimming beneath the surface with its glowing eyes. Was it nearby? Did it sense them? she wondered. With each wave that crashed, she imagined it to be The Beast ramming itself against the boat, angry that they had trespassed into his part of the sea. Then stopping, Whimsy looked out into the darkness of the sea. Did she just hear a roar? Suddenly the boat dipped down and up causing her to stumble over a floating crate at her feet. Her hand reached out for the side of the boat but it slipped off the wet edge. She fell.

  The Sinker III is sinking!

  ‘Whimsy!’ Woe cried against the wind. He felt his heart tighten. He was too far away to reach her.

  Whimsy gasped as she felt herself hit the side of the boat. She saw her brother extend an arm out towards her, his eyes wide in fear. Then he was gone as she tumbled overboard and plunged head first towards the dark churning waves below.

  40

  In which they steer through a stormy sea

  The dark sea was an inch from Whimsy’s face and she was sure The Beast was below waiting for her. But a hand grabbed her by the raincoat. She was hoisted roughly back into the boat. Sprawled on the deck, Whimsy looked up to see the smiling face of Jeremiah, next to the scared-stiff face of her brother.

  ‘Yer not meeting The Beast today,’ Jeremiah said through the rain. Then he lifted her to her feet and grabbed another bucket. He ran out to the bow and started scooping and tipping out water faster than Whimsy and Woe ever could.

  Woe hugged his sister. ‘Are you okay?’

  Whimsy could only nod. Instead of being face to face with her brother, she could have been face to face with The Beast. She shivered at the thought.

  Woe held onto his sister. Thinking quickly, he remembered that Bertie Potts used rope to keep himself from falling when he scaled the dangerous mountaintop of Mount Mont. He looked around the flooded deck and spotted a weathered rope hanging from the side of the wheelhouse. Woe tied one end to the railing and the other end to Whimsy and himself, double-knotting it just in case. He offered the rope to Jeremiah but the captain merely laughed.

  ‘It’s just a little windy,’ he said.

  Now safely tied to the boat with neither of them at risk of falling overboard, the Mordaunt siblings continued trying to remove the water from the deck. They scooped and they tossed bucket after bucket of water. The wild wind continued to lash at them and the cold rain continued to pour down. Woe’s arms were beginning to ache and Whimsy could feel herself losing energy. But they continued to scoop and toss, scoop and toss.

  Whimsy and Woe looked at Jeremiah through the rain. The captain seemed as carefree as ever, so much so, he was singing while he worked! Woe was sure he heard the first few lines of ‘Fish Are Friends Too’ amidst the noise of the storm. Then a thought occurred to Woe: If Jeremiah is out here . . . then who is steering the boat?

  ‘Who’s steering?’ yelled Woe to the captain.

  Jeremiah stopped his movements and called back, ‘What?’

  ‘Who’s steering?’ yelled Woe again making a steering motion with the bucket in his hands.

  ‘Why, my first mate, of course!’ called Jeremiah. Woe nodded, relieved. Until he remembered that Eloise, their mouse, was Jeremiah’s first mate! Woe looked hesitantly up at the wheelhouse and hoped that Eloise would be able to steer them safely through the storm.

  It wasn’t until an hour had passed that the rain and wind stopped, and the water on deck subsided. The sea soon followed and became less rough. They had done it. They had saved The Sinker III from sinking for a third time.

  ‘Aha!’ cried Jeremiah, jubilantly. ‘The Sinker III refuses to be sunk!’

  Woe was sure he was going to collapse from exhaustion at any moment and Whimsy had started to yawn uncontrollably. Completely soaked from head to toe, the three of them retreated to the wheelhouse. And there, sitting on the steering wheel calmly, was Eloise.

  ‘Yer mouse is an exceptional first mate!’ said Jeremiah.

  Whimsy was relieved to see Jeremiah take over the steering of the boat from Eloise.

  Once out of their wet raincoats, each Mordaunt curled up on the lounge and soon fell asleep, the waves outside now nothing more than a soothing backdrop to slumber.

  41

  In which Jeremiah takes them Anywhere

  Whimsy woke first. The sun had lit up the wheelhouse so brightly that she could see it behind her closed eyes. And it was soon followed by a pungent smell.

  ‘Mornin’,’ said Jeremiah from his captain’s chair. He sat with Eloise, feeding her the crumbs from his breakfast. Whimsy noticed that Eloise was wearing a little sailor hat made out of paper.

  ‘Help yourself,’ he said pointing to a basket of bread and fruit on the table. ‘Yer’ll be glad to hear it’s smooth sailin’ from now on.’

  ‘Excellent,’ said Whimsy relieved. She didn’t want to have another near run-in with The Beast. ‘Where exactly are we heading?’ She grabbed a roll from the basket.

  ‘Anywhere,’ said Jeremiah, as though it was obvious.

  ‘Anywhere?’ echoed Woe. Awake now, he rubbed the sleep from his eyes and grabbed an apple.

  ‘Anywhere Swamp,’ said Jeremiah. ‘That’s what yer meant when you said “anywhere” wasn’t it?’

  Whimsy looked at Woe realising the confusion.

  ‘Oh, Jeremiah . . .’ said Whimsy, about to explain.

  ‘Because we are almost there,’ said the captain. ‘Yer can see it up ahead.’ He pointed out the window. The sea no longer surrounded them. In its place was a river of dense, green and brown swamp. In the distance they could see the shapes of buildings and houses on stilts.

  ‘We could give it a try?’ suggested Woe to his sister.

  ‘I doubt the troupe travelled here,’ said Whimsy not liking the look nor sound of Anywhere Swamp. ‘Is there somewhere else?’

  Jeremiah tapped a dial near the steering wheel. ‘I need to get back to Cleeth Bay to refuel.’

  ‘We still need to find Fry,’ offered Woe. They couldn’t go back to Cleeth Bay or risk sailing through another storm.

  As they approached land, Whimsy and Woe stepped out onto the deck. At once Whimsy located the source of the pungent smell. It was the swamp. Steam rose up from it and the smell that wafted towards them made them hold their noses closed. It reminded Woe of the paint Apoline made him use at the Idle Slug. The one that bubbled and burnt his skin.

  Soon the boat stopped at a wharf. On it was a wooden sign that read:

  ‘Certainly no fresh fruit?’ read Woe, looking down at the apple in his hand.

  ‘Definitely no animals?’ read Whimsy. Eloise, she thought.

  Woe thought of Eloise too. He wanted to keep the friendly mouse. She had been through so much with them. ‘Maybe Jeremiah can . . .’ offered Woe unable to finish the sentence. He didn’t want to leave Eloise.

  ‘Herman Astor likes his rules,’ said the captain coming to stand next to them. Eloise squeaked happily from his sho
ulder. Her paper sailor hat still on her tiny head.

  ‘Herman Astor?’ asked Whimsy.

  ‘The Swamp Master.’

  Woe looked at Eloise. She seemed happy with Jeremiah. ‘Eloise likes you,’ he said to the captain, quickly making a start on his apple.

  Whimsy knew Woe was right. She didn’t want to leave Eloise either but she knew they had to keep moving. Mr Solt could be searching the Sea of Teers for them already. ‘Will you take good care of her?’ she asked, tears welling in her eyes. Eloise had been with them since the beginning of their time at the Idle Slug. She had been their friend when they had no-one else.

  ‘Aye!’ said Jeremiah happily.

  The Mordaunt siblings gave Eloise one last pat, saying goodbye to their mouse.

  ‘Thank you for helping us,’ said Woe to Jeremiah.

  ‘When I get back to Cleeth Bay, I might look into that singin’ and dancin’. I’ve had my fill of the fisherman’s life. Fish are yer friends too.’

  After grabbing their belongings, Whimsy and Woe stood on the wharf and waved farewell as the boat turned around and went back the way it had come through the swampland. All the while, the siblings couldn’t shake the feeling that they had said goodbye to an important, mouse-sized part of them.

  42

  In which Whimsy and Woe are swamped

  As they walked along the wharf of the swamp, Whimsy tried to ignore the feeling of uneasiness that sat uncomfortably below her chest. Trees and tree stumps rose out of the mossy swamp around them. Amongst the trees, were old cabins with brown roofs. By the worn look of them, Woe thought they might be abandoned. And the more they continued along the wharf, the more Woe felt this to be true, as they had yet to see any people. There was just green and brown in every direction.

  When the wharf finished, it turned into a wooden path, which the siblings followed further into the swamp. Soon more cabins came into view, this time with red roofs instead of brown, and the smell became worse.