Almost Eden

by Anita Horrocks

  Dad shook his head but let us do what we wanted. Grandma rolled her eyes and muttered, “What do you want with that old kohta?”

  Only Auntie Nettie smiled and said, “You go right ahead and keep looking. It helps nothing just to pucker the lips, you have to whistle, not?” Which is what Mom always said when Lena and I promised to clean our room and then never did.

  Beth even gave us a ride out to TK’s drive-in on the highway, so we could put a poster up there, too. And then she drove us along the country roads between town and Nickel Enns’ farm, so we could have one last look for Tommy.

  And when we had one poster left, Jillian said we should put it up at Eden, and maybe stop in to say hi to my mom. I’d finally got around to telling them where Mom was and what I planned to do about it. The minute they’d arrived to make posters that morning, I’d dragged them upstairs to my room and shut the door. Good thing Lena was busy playing with Domino so I didn’t have to worry about her spying on us. Just to make sure, I checked under the beds.

  “What’s up?” Jillian demanded. She flopped on my bed. “You’re like a Mexican jumping bean.”

  That’s exactly how I felt, too, like my insides were full of jumping beans. I took a deep breath. “Okay. Here’s the thing. I have to get my mom out of Eden for a couple of hours.”

  Right away Jillian and Sadie looked at each other. For almost three weeks already my mom had been in that place and this was the first I’d said anything to them about it. But I could see on their faces that they knew already.

  “It has to be at night,” I added. “Actually, it has to be tomorrow night.” Might as well give them the whole scoop up front.

  “Jeepers,” breathed Sadie. “Why don’t you break into Fort Knox while you’re at it?”

  But nothing fazed Jillian. “We’ll have a pajama party at my place,” she said. I could practically see her brain shifting into high gear. “Then it’ll be easy to sneak out.”

  My knees went all weak like a dishrag. I sank to the floor, cross-legged. “So you don’t think I’m totally crazy?”

  “Of course you are. Crazy and brilliant.” Jillian hugged her knees against her chest, looking at me all thoughtful like. “I wasn’t sure what to say before, you know, about your mom. I thought you didn’t want to talk about it.”

  “I didn’t, I guess.” Uy. This was something I hadn’t counted on, but if my friends were going to help out and everything, they probably deserved to know what was going on. “Sometimes Mom…gets sort of lost. She gets sad. It’s hard to explain.”

  It was hard to think of the right words, especially when I wasn’t sure what I was trying to say even. And then I didn’t have to.

  “It doesn’t matter,” said Jillian. “What I’d really like to know is what are we going to do once we get her out?”

  I pulled my feet up into a lotus position which was the only yoga position I knew, and breathed deep. Now for sure they were going to think I was crazy.

  “Take her out to the country and show her the stars,” I said, looking them straight in the eyes.

  Mom needed to see the stars. Not the way they looked when they started to come out at night. Not the way they looked in town. She needed to see the stars at two in the morning, when the sky was full to bursting. When all those gazillions of stars shining in the heavens made everything else seem…like not such a big deal. Not because the stars made a person feel small and unimportant. It was like, the opposite.

  For sure you were small. But the universe was huge and glorious and somehow, you were connected up to that. It was almost like there was a power in being part of something so glorious, a power that gave a person hope. That made anything and everything seem possible.

  “Show her the stars?” Sadie didn’t get it.

  I knew she wouldn’t. Neither would Jillian. How could they, unless they’d seen it for themselves? I nodded. “Yep.”

  “Couldn’t she just look out her window?”

  “Nope,” I shook my head. “It’s not the same.” I didn’t try to explain. Either they were going to help me, or they weren’t.

  First thing, we had to get Mom out of Eden. In the middle of the night. Then out into the country where there were no lights. And it had to be a clear night. Tomorrow, when it was supposed to stop raining and the new moon wouldn’t be so big yet it would drown out all the stars.

  Anyways, that was my idea. If I had the guts to go through with it. Taking off to look for Tommy was one thing. Kidnapping my own mother was something else again. I could hardly believe I was thinking about it, never mind that I was going to do it yet.

  It helps nothing just to pucker the lips, I thought, you have to whistle.

  Remembering that made me feel better again. An idea wasn’t any good unless you did something about it, not?

  Jillian slid off the bed to sit beside me. “Anything we can do to help, we’ll do it.”

  “For sure,” said Sadie.

  “Okay,” I nodded. “Here’s what I was thinking…” Their grins got bigger and bigger as they helped to work it all out.

  “What are you going to tell her?” Sadie blurted out in the car, after Jillian said we should go visit my mom.

  Jillian jabbed her hard in the ribs with an elbow and I hissed at her under my breath.

  “What do you have to tell Mom about?” Beth frowned at us in the rearview mirror and we wiped the grins off our faces. Never mind how nice Beth was being lately, she wasn’t going to go for letting us sneak out in the middle of the night.

  “Nothing,” I said, thinking fast. “For sure not about Tommy. I don’t think I’ll tell her that he’s missing. Just in case he still comes back yet.”

  Beth shook her head. “That’s not going to happen. You know that, don’t you?” But she didn’t say it in a mean way. She said it like she was a little sorry even. “Stopping to see Mom is a good idea, though. You did promise Dad.”

  This wasn’t how I’d planned it. What would I do if Mom didn’t know who I was, never mind recognize my friends?

  But there was no way out. Before I knew it Beth, Jillian, and Sadie had swept me through the front door. Beth marched right in like she owned the place. Mom was awake, sitting in a chair in her room.

  Beth stooped to kiss her forehead. “Hi, Mom. We brought you some flowers.”

  “They’re lovely,” Mom smiled. “Thank you.”

  Beth grabbed a water glass from the table and arranged the wildflowers we’d picked. “I’ll just get some water for them.” She raised her eyebrows at me on her way to the bathroom. “Are you coming in or not?”

  I didn’t realize I was standing in the doorway still. Behind me Sadie gave a little cough. Jillian nudged me forward. I took three quick steps across the room to give Mom a kiss.

  “Hello, sweetheart,” she smiled. “It’s been so long since I’ve seen you. You’re browner, and taller!”

  “I’m not any taller than last week, Mom.”

  “Oh, I don’t know.” She winked and gave me a one-arm hug. “And look who you’ve brought with you!”

  Mom seemed better, that’s for sure. At least she wasn’t so mixed up as last time. I couldn’t tell, though, if she was really cheerful, or if she was faking it.

  “They’ve finally opened your window for you,” I said.

  “It’s been so terribly hot the last few nights. Most of us have started to sleep with our doors and windows open because of the heat. Anything to get a breeze.”

  “We’ll ask Dad to get you a fan,” said Beth, returning with the flowers.

  “What do you do all day in here?” Jillian asked, looking around the room and frowning.

  Yikes, what a question! I winced inside. I’d never had the guts to ask that question and here it had just popped out of Jillian. But Mom laughed.

  “Well,” she said. “I go to group, and to craft time.”

  “You do crafts?” Sadie laughed.

  “We sew leather wallets together,” Mom nodded. “It’s quite an artform.�
� Then she winked, grinning. “I hate it! Oh, how I hate it!”

  “Why do it then?” I asked.

  “Because,” she shrugged, “I keep thinking that if I play along like a good patient and pretend to enjoy it, then maybe they’ll let me go home sooner!”

  We all laughed, and after that visiting was easy. I didn’t tell Mom anything about our plans, though. I couldn’t, not with Beth right there. Anyways, even if Beth hadn’t been with us, I didn’t have a clue what I would’ve said.

  “Your mom doesn’t look sick,” Jillian whispered to me as we left. “Not, you know, like some of the other people in here.”

  I hesitated, and then blurted, “Sometimes I think if she stays here too long, she’ll maybe turn into one of those robots.”

  Jillian nodded. “Yeah. But don’t worry.” She grinned, throwing her arm around my shoulders. “Your mom’s too cool to let that happen.”

  I was too surprised to say anything. My mom? Cool?

  We were in the middle of eating supper when the police showed up at our door again. It was the same cop who’d asked us all the questions before. At first I thought he had more questions for us, only he didn’t.

  Instead he told us how another little girl from the next town had disappeared while she was riding her bike in the park. She’d gone missing that same morning.

  Good thing we were all sitting down already. My chest got so tight when the cop told us that, I could hardly breathe. My friends and I sometimes rode our bikes to that town to play in that park. It had the best climbing tree in all of southern Manitoba.

  Almost right after the girl was reported missing, he said, the police had stopped a truck like the one Lena and I had told them about. The truck’s license plate was ADP 358.

  “You were right about that license number,” he nodded at me.

  And in the back of the truck, what do you think? The police found the girl. Her name was Melody. She was younger even than Lena. The man had Melody tied up so she couldn’t run away, and he’d taped her mouth, so she couldn’t yell for help or anything.

  My insides felt like they’d melted and drained away, thinking about how scared Melody must have been. She was okay now though, the cop said. At least, she was back home with her family. They’d found her before anything even worse happened. And the man who took her was in jail. This time everything had turned out okay

  “We had nothing else to go on,” the police officer told Dad. “If it wasn’t for your daughters’ description, we would never have been looking for that truck.”

  I guess going to look for Tommy wasn’t all for nusht after all. Not for Melody, it wasn’t.

  Something like that makes you think, that’s for sure.

  Friday morning right off the bat, Dad put the kibosh our plan.

  “No sleepovers. No bloody way,” he said flatly. “Not after what’s happened. Not at Jillian’s or Sadie’s or anyone else’s house either.”

  “But, the guy was caught, Dad!”

  “I said no, Elsie. If you have to have a sleepover, you can have your friends over here.”

  My jaw dropped. Never in my wildest dreams would I have ever imagined Dad letting me have friends over without Mom around. I don’t think he knew what he’d said even until after he’d said it.

  I made an emergency phone call to Jillian. “Now what are we going to do?”

  Jillian thought a minute. “Time to call in the troops,” she said. “Invite everyone for a pajama party, like your Dad said. With so many of us, your Dad won’t notice you’re missing. And if he does, we’ll just say you’re in the bathroom or went to get something or whatever.”

  A few days ago I would’ve gone along with it, no problem. But I wasn’t so crazy anymore about lying to my Dad. “I don’t want anyone to have to lie,” I said. “Eleanor and Joy couldn’t lie even if they tried, which they wouldn’t.”

  “Okay. We won’t lie. Like I said, if we’re careful we probably won’t have to.”

  I wasn’t so sure as Jillian. It sounded to me like a lot of people would maybe have to bear false witness to make this plan work. If not actually lying, for sure we’d be pulling the wool over Dad’s eyes. Whether God was watching or not, I didn’t like it. Only I couldn’t think of a better idea.

  There was still Lena to deal with yet. She wasn’t going to be so easy to get rid of.

  “If you can’t beat ’em, join ’em,” said Jillian.

  So we told Lena she could come to the party if she wanted. Her face lit up.

  “On one condition,” I added. “You have to help us with a secret mission. Which means you can’t say a word to Beth or Dad about what we do at our party.”

  “I won’t,” she promised. “Cross my heart and hope to die.”

  Fuy. It wasn’t enough that I was going down the road to hell, now I was dragging my little sister with me, too. I could hardly believe how far and how fast I’d fallen. If there was a God, I was toast for sure.

  All the way while I was riding to Eden that evening, and even while I was stashing my bike in the bushes, I was still wondering what kind of mouse I was stirring up for myself now. I was wishing I was back on my front porch camped out with all my friends. Only thing was, camping out with my friends wouldn’t do too much of anything for Mom. It helps nothing just to pucker the lips, I reminded myself.

  Anyways, at least the police had caught that creep who liked to pick up little kids. Otherwise I might have been too chicken to do what I was doing.

  I checked the watch I’d borrowed from Heather. We’d synchronized watches, Jillian and I, before I left. Visiting hours at Eden would last another hour yet. Plenty of time still. I strolled around the building and across the road to the service station, all the time trying to look cool, like I just wanted a soft drink and not like I was getting ready to kidnap my own mother.

  Quite a few people were coming and going from Eden. I bought a Mountain Dew from the cooler and hung around, pretending I was checking out the candy bars. Sure enough, it didn’t take too long before three people walked across the grounds to the service station. They came inside to buy smokes and pop. When they headed back, I followed them.

  I followed them across the grounds, up the steps and right through the front door.

  The nurse at the front desk was busy talking to someone. She nodded at us when we came in, but I don’t think she really noticed me that much because I made sure to keep the others between me and her. Not that it would have made a diff, if she did see me I mean. But I wanted to stay inconspicuous, just in case.

  After that it was pretty easy. I ducked through the lounge and down the hall to Mom’s room like always. Outside her open door I stopped, going over in my head one more time what I was going to tell her.

  Good thing I didn’t walk in right aways. I could hear someone in there, visiting with her. Not just someone. Dad. I couldn’t tell what they were saying because they were talking Plautdietsch. Now what was I going to do? The plan was for me to hide in Mom’s room. I never thought about what would happen if Mom had visitors, never mind Dad yet!

  I checked the time again. Dad probably wouldn’t leave until visiting hours were over. The game would be over before it started if I was wandering the hallways when the nurses came around to check up on everyone.

  A drop of sweat trickled down my face. Mom was right. It was crazy hot in here. I couldn’t think right, it was so hot. I slipped away quietly, back to the lounge again. It was a little cooler in here at least.

  What I needed was another place to hide. Think, meyahl! I wandered around, pretending I was waiting for someone. Funny thing was, no one paid me too much attention. It was almost like I wasn’t there. The patients watching TV had their backs to me. The other people in the room were mostly visiting with each other. The robot patients sitting here and there or shuffling around, they never even saw me.

  I leaned against the upright piano in the corner, wondering if maybe I was invisible. So it goes. When you’re a kid, grown-ups look right pa
st you. Which tonight, for once, was a good thing.

  The intercom crackled and spit. “Visiting hours will be over in five minutes.”

  For some reason, people look up always when there is an announcement over the intercom. I saw my chance and grabbed it. When everyone in the lounge looked over at the speaker on the wall, I slipped in behind the piano.

  It was perfect. There was lots of room for a kid like me to hide, room enough to sit in the corner, even stretch my legs out if I wanted to. Now all I had to do was wait. I checked to see if my watch was working still. Three long hours of waiting to go. All the way till midnight.

  From behind the piano I could hear people moving around, saying good-bye. Feet shuffled past. Then it got quiet for a long time. Just when I was thinking everyone had left and I could maybe breathe a little easier, I heard one more set of footsteps cross the room. And then the lights went out.

  I hugged my knees closer.

  You’d think three hours hiding behind a piano would give a person plenty of time to think, to sort out stuff in their head. Only I found out it didn’t work that way. Not if the whole time the person is too scared and too hot to think about anything except getting out of the place where they’re hiding.

  Every time there was a noise, I jumped.

  One time the bushes scratched against the window nearby. First thing I thought it was a wild animal trying to get in, but then I figured out it was probably just a breeze outside. One time I heard tiny paws skittering over the tile and wondered if the people who worked here knew they had mice. One time I heard this real soft click, click, click–so soft I had to hold my breath to make sure I’d heard it. Click, click, click. After a long time I figured out that I was hearing the sound the second hand made as it moved around the clock on the wall over my head.

  I counted up to five hundred seconds and might have counted still more, only then someone came into the room. I held my breath, listening to the footsteps shuffle around the room, wandering here and there. When I couldn’t hold my breath any longer, I cupped my hands over my mouth and breathed as quietly as I could. The footsteps shuffled closer and closer, till whoever was in the room was standing right beside the piano.