Thankful for Love

by Peggy Bird

  “I guess that’s about as good a recommendation as any. Still...”

  He put his arm around her shoulder and hugged her. “I appreciate your concern, and I know how much you’ll miss being with the boys every day. Really I do. But I’m confident she’ll be fine. Stop worrying.”

  “Who’ll be fine, Dad? What’s Gramma worried about?” Daniel, who had apparently overheard the last part of the conversation, seemed concerned.

  His son was a worrier. Jack knew he had to nip this in the bud. “She’s not worried about anything, buddy. We’re talking about how we’re going to make the switch from her being here to Quanna taking over.”

  “Why can’t we have Aunt Barbara or someone we know babysit us?” Daniel sought the solace of a hug from his grandmother who happily gave it to him.

  “We’ve been over this already. Aunt Barbara has other responsibilities, and Gramma will be having surgery soon and will be out of commission. Aunt Joan says Quanna is perfect for this job, and I trust her judgment.”

  “But, Dad...”

  “No buts, Daniel. It’s done. Starting in a week, Quanna will be working here. And I expect you to treat her with the same respect you give your grandmother.”

  Daniel didn’t look convinced. But, then, neither did Anne.

  Chapter 3

  Quanna’s parents hadn’t been able to afford the Barbie Dream House she’d wanted when she was a kid. But working at the Richardson Ranch was more than making up for her childhood disappointment. Barbie would eat her heart out if she saw this house. The kitchen was a pleasure to cook in, and the light housekeeping chores were hardly chores at all when they were done in such a pleasant setting.

  Her daily tasks mainly consisted of keeping the kitchen clean, the boys’ rooms and living areas tidied, and the laundry washed and put away. Apparently Jack and the boys did the rest of the cleaning on the weekends. Someone did—the place was always neat, and there was never any dust or dirt to be seen. Quanna did a few extra things to help, like wiping up the dirt tracked in by someone who forgot to remove his shoes, but mostly, she stuck to taking care of the kids and their belongings unless she was asked to do something else.

  It had been awkward working with Anne Salazar for a week. She seemed distant, cool even. It was obvious she couldn’t do many of the things that needed to be done, but it was also clear she wasn’t crazy about the idea of handing it all over to someone else. Quanna wrote it off to the pain she was experiencing from her bad hip. At least, that’s what she hoped it was and not something like being unhappy that Quanna was taking her job.

  It was a relief when she was finally in charge of the job by herself. Trying to help the boys become comfortable with her, she changed little at first. There would be plenty of time later for new foods and routines. She figured out who ate which cereal and what their favorite lunch treats were and made sure to include what they liked in their meals. She asked them to help her set up a routine for doing homework and chores. Her own daily tasks were done while they were in school. Before she left each day, she prepared their evening meal and had the table set. The boys did the cleanup so well there was never a trace of a dirty dish or pan the next morning when she arrived.

  But, although the boys did all their chores and homework as asked, nothing seemed to fully open up the lines of communication with her. They were never rude or mean. She assumed they’d been told to treat her politely and with respect because they did as she asked and never talked back. But they kept their distance, especially Daniel who only seemed to talk to her when she addressed him directly. Lucas was a bit more open, and she tried to cultivate him in hopes he would influence his brother.

  She knew from overhearing some of their conversations they weren’t crazy about having a stranger in place of their beloved grandmother, but she wasn’t sure how to make it better. It was like being in charge of ghost kids, they were around her so infrequently, and when they were, they were quiet.

  Their father was another matter. His presence was only too apparent. Not that he hovered. However, Quanna saw a lot more of him than she’d expected. He ran the ranch from his home office on the second floor. Most of the time, he was out in the barn or the fields, but some mornings and the occasional afternoon, he was in the house handling paperwork, making phone calls, and doing who-knew-what-else to keep the ranch going.

  Then there was the outdoorsy, sage-y smell she was learning to associate with him. When she took towels from the master bathroom to fill a load of wash one day, she discovered it was from the soap he used. The scent lingered in her nostrils for the rest of the day, as did the image of him using the soap in the shower, making her think of him more than she should and in highly unprofessional ways.

  His laundry sometimes made her blush when she folded it. Well, his black boxer briefs did. Not from touching the underwear itself but from the occasional thought that popped into her head of what he would look like wearing only what she was holding in her hands.

  Unlike at the Golden Years where she had often joined the other women on staff in trying to catch a glimpse of him, in this job, she did what she could to stay out of his way. It was partly because she didn’t want to be a nuisance, but she also had to admit she didn’t want to deal with the attraction she felt when she was around him. After only a few weeks, she began to wonder if taking a job where she was in such close contact with someone who affected her so strongly had been such a good idea. She’d never had this kind of response to a man before. Her one serious relationship in Portland hadn’t affected her the way Jack did. Most of the guys she’d dated had been more friends than anything else.

  Almost every day, she started the morning reminding herself how important the job was to her. It would be stupid to mess it up by flirting with the boss. She’d be right back worrying about money again if it all blew up in her face. Besides, no matter how polite he was, it was certainly possible a woman who was half Indian, half Latina wasn’t the kind of woman he was attracted to. Not to mention the kind of woman his friends would approve of for him. So she focused on making sure he was happy with her work and tried to ignore the growing attraction she felt for the man who signed her paycheck.

  But managing her feelings about Jack was a minor challenge compared to the one she had trying to get her charges to warm up to her. After a few weeks, Lucas began to thaw. He was a naturally talkative and cuddly kid, and she was only too glad to engage in whatever conversation he wanted to have, as well as give him the hugs and cuddles he liked.

  Daniel was another story. Her relationship with him improved so slowly she was sure she would never crack what seemed to be his determination to keep her at bay. She said nothing to Jack, always telling him things were great and hoping it would be true soon.

  Then two incidents with the family’s horses occurred.

  The first happened when Jack invited her to join them on their weekly horseback ride. She was delighted to be asked and happy to say yes. On the specified day, she arrived at work wearing boots instead of her usual athletic shoes. Daniel immediately noticed.

  “How come you’re wearing boots?” he asked.

  “Don’t you remember? Your dad invited me to ride with you after school.”

  “Oh. I forgot.”

  He seemed more distant than usual, but Quanna forgot about it after the boys went off to school and she got caught up in her daily routine.

  When Jack brought the boys home that afternoon, he suggested they eat their snack quickly and then go to the barn where Quanna knew there were four Appaloosa horses and a colt stabled: Jack’s horse, Hero, Lucas’s Spot, Daniel’s Paint, and a fourth horse called Rose who had recently given birth to the colt Petal.

  Quanna was tidying up the boys’ books and jackets in the entryway when she heard Jack say, “Okay, guys, let’s get going before we run out of daylight. Daniel, if you help Lucas saddle Spot, I’ll saddle Hero and help Quanna get Rose ready.”

  “No. Quanna can’t ride Rose,” Daniel protested. “Ro
se isn’t hers.”

  “I know she isn’t, son,” Jack said. He sounded patient as he explained. “But Rose is an easy horse to ride, and since I don’t know how well Quanna rides, I thought...”

  “You can’t let her, Dad. It’s not right.” He sounded close to tears. “Rose doesn’t belong to her.”

  “Okay, then you ride Rose and Quanna can ride Paint,” Jack said.

  “Rose isn’t my horse either. I want to ride my horse.” Daniel’s voice was beginning to reach a pitch high enough to hurt human ears. “You can’t let someone ride someone else’s horse.”

  Quanna hurried to the kitchen, hoping to get there before Daniel burst into tears. “Jack, I’ve been thinking. As much as I appreciate your offer to let me ride with you, I better stay here. I haven’t finished the laundry, and I haven’t even started dinner yet. If it’s okay with you, I’ll take a rain check.”

  Jack’s look of relief was all the signal she needed to know she’d made the right decision, although she had no idea why Daniel was so upset over which horse she rode.

  “If that’s what you think is best, that’s what we’ll do.” He shooed the boys out the back door. “Let’s get going, then.” Before he followed them, he turned and mouthed the words, “Thank you.”

  Dismayed at Daniel’s vehement objection to her riding with them, Quanna sought comfort in the routine of her job. She put the dishes and glasses from the afternoon snack into the dishwasher and began prepping dinner. When she was finished, she mixed up a batch of chocolate chip cookie dough and began to bake cookies. She hoped the process—and the smells—of baking would help her feel less hurt that Daniel seemed to be having so much trouble accepting her role in the household.

  About an hour later, she heard the sound of horses on the gravel drive and saw the three Richardsons ride toward the barn. After they unsaddled and stabled their mounts, the two boys came into the kitchen through the mudroom. Lucas took off his boots and immediately raced into the family room. Daniel lingered in the kitchen, his eyes downcast, a stubborn expression on his face.

  Finally he said, “I’m sorry I messed up the ride for you.”

  “I’m sorry something upset you. Do we need to talk about what it was? Did I do something?”

  “You didn’t do anything. And Dad already talked to me.”

  “Okay, as long as there’s not a problem between us.”

  “There isn’t.” He began to edge toward the door to the living room, seeming to be anxious to escape. “I’m going upstairs.”

  “I made some cookies.” She indicated the two cooling racks on the island breakfast bar. “Take one with you, if you like. I think I can convince your dad it’s okay to have one before dinner.”

  Daniel grabbed a cookie and ran. He had been gone less than five minutes when Jack came in the house. He seemed almost as uncomfortable as his son had been. “Did Daniel apologize to you for screwing up your chance to ride with us?” he asked.

  “He did, but he didn’t explain. What was it all about?”

  Jack sighed and ran his fingers through his hair, a gesture Quanna was beginning to recognize as a sign he was uncomfortable. “Rose was Paula—his mother’s—horse. I thought he’d be okay with your riding her, but he wasn’t. He wouldn’t even ride her himself. I didn’t check with him beforehand, and I should have. He was hit particularly hard by Paula’s death. Didn’t—wouldn’t—talk about it for months. We all went to a counselor, and it helped some. Lately, he’s been talking about her a little more. I thought ... well, I guess I was too hopeful.”

  “It isn’t hard to understand how he feels. I know how hard it was for me when my dad died a few years ago, and I was a lot older than Daniel.”

  “Still, he wasn’t thinking about your feelings, which is what he should have apologized for.”

  “He did fine. Don’t worry about it.” She pointed to the cooling racks. “I made his favorite cookies. Maybe that’ll get me a few points with him. I also told him I’d convince you it was okay that he took one upstairs with him.”

  “Ordinarily, I’d say ‘you lose,’ but I’ll let it slide this time. Thank you for understanding.” He grinned at her as he grabbed a handful of cookies. “And for letting me take more than one of these before dinner.”

  She watched him saunter into the living room and wondered if she had ever known anyone who could make the sun come out with just a grin the way Jack Richardson could.

  Chapter 4

  Oddly enough, the incident over the horseback ride seemed to help Quanna’s relationship with Daniel. At least, he began to have conversations with her instead of merely answering the questions she asked of him. He even let her give him a slight hug when she sent him off to school. Sometimes. It wasn’t the warmer relationship she was beginning to have with his brother, but it was better than it had been.

  Then the second incident involving the family’s Appaloosas occurred.

  This one started when Daniel walked in from school and said, “Where’s Dad? It’s our day to go riding.” He obviously knew, from the absence of the family pickup in the drive, his father wasn’t home. His scrunched up face and tone of voice showed his displeasure.

  “I don’t know. He’s been gone all day,” Quanna answered. “But I wouldn’t worry if I were you. He always makes good on his promises. Why don’t you take your snack into the dining room and get started on your homework while you wait for him?”

  When the look on his face didn’t change, it was obvious her response hadn’t been the one he wanted. He muttered something unintelligible as he slung his backpack onto the bench in the entry, took out two books and a notebook, and strode off to the kitchen without saying anything more. Lucas, who was smart enough to stay out of the line of fire when his older brother was in a bad mood, grabbed his books and followed, also without a word.

  “I was about to go upstairs to finish the laundry,” Quanna called after them. “But if you need help with your homework, I can stay downstairs.”

  She got the answer she expected, given the look on Daniel’s face—no response. Oh, well. Two steps forward, one step back. Mentally shrugging her shoulders, Quanna went upstairs.

  Perhaps it was the sting of the dismissal. Or she could have been preoccupied with the chore she was trying to finish. The noise of the dryer might have obscured what was going on downstairs. Or more accurately, what wasn’t going on. Whatever the reason, somehow she didn’t pick up on the lack of noise. If she’d been aware of the silence, she’d have known something was up. The two boys were always talking to each other when they thought adults were out of earshot, even if it was only to bicker about who should get the bigger cookie. Chatterbox Lucas made sure of that.

  When she went downstairs twenty minutes later to check on her charges, she not only heard how quiet it was but she discovered why—the boys were nowhere to be found. They were not in the dining room, although their books were. They weren’t in the kitchen, although the empty plates from the apple slices and crackers spread with peanut butter she’d prepared for them were in the sink.

  Calling their names, she checked the family room but found no evidence they’d been there. She went back upstairs, thinking they may have slipped past her to their rooms while she was occupied with laundry. But their rooms were as empty of their presence as the rest of the house was.

  Panicked, she ran down the steps and out the back door, hoping they’d gone to the barn to do their chores. Before she could get halfway to her goal, Daniel rode up on his horse.

  “Daniel, what are you doing? You know your dad doesn’t want you riding without an adult with you.” She grabbed at the bridle of the horse to stop him. “You were supposed to wait for him to come home and go with you.”

  “He was taking too long. I wanted to go for a ride before it got dark so we went on our own.”

  She was about to lay into him for disobeying when she noticed his face, which looked like every drop of blood had been drained from it. And she realized what—or who�
��wasn’t with him. “Where’s your brother?”

  He hitched his chin in the direction from which he’d come. “Back there. Spot must have stumbled or something and threw Lucas. He landed funny. He might have ... maybe he broke his arm. I tried to get him to ride back here, but he wouldn’t get back on Spot. He says it’s because his arm and leg hurt. But I think it’s because he’s afraid.”

  Two emotions hit Quanna at the same time—concern for Lucas and anger at Daniel for disobeying, knowing as surely as she knew her own name Lucas hadn’t come up with the idea of riding on his own. A third emotion—fear of what Jack would say—tried to elbow its way into her consciousness, but she wouldn’t let it. She had other things to deal with.

  “Stay here. Do not move. And I mean it. Not an inch. I need to find something I can use for a splint. Then you’re going to take me to him.” She found small boards and several old, clean towels that were used to wipe down the horses after a ride and returned. “I’m going to ride behind you. Take your foot out of the left stirrup and hold Paint still.”

  Daniel didn’t argue or hesitate, but did as she demanded. When she’d mounted the horse and settled into the saddle behind him, he said, “You did that like you’ve ridden a lot.”

  “We can talk about my riding experiences later. I need to get to Lucas. Take me to him.”

  In less than five minutes, they came upon a small ball of little boy, huddled on the ground, Spot’s reins in his left hand. Lucas’s face was dusty and tear-streaked. From the abnormal angle of his right arm, Quanna was sure at least one of the bones in his forearm was broken.

  When she dismounted and ran to him, her splint materials in hand, he struggled to stand up but seemed to have difficulty with his right leg. “Did you hurt your leg, too?” she asked.

  “I think I sprained my ankle,” he said. And burst into fresh tears.