Detective Trigger: Books 1-3

by M. A. Owens

  “Should you be?”

  “What do you want?”

  “Lily hired me to look into something that’s gone missing from her house. And—”

  She looked at me like I just stepped on her tail. “And she thinks I stole it!”

  “No, ma’am, she doesn’t think you’d actually ever steal anything.”

  “And you?”

  “Mind if I come in?”

  She motioned for me to come inside. I took off my hat and coat, handing it to her. She looked uncomfortable by my doing so and showed reluctance in hanging it up for me, but she did anyways.

  “Have a seat,” she said.

  I sat on the couch.

  “What did you say your name was again?”

  “Trigger, ma’am. I’m a private detective.”

  “Sorry I shouted at you. I was just surprised is all. Ask your questions.”

  “You ever been in trouble with the law, ma’am?”

  “Not really,” she said, shifting uncomfortably.

  “Can you be more specific?”

  “Can you, sir?”

  “No, ma’am. I mean just that. I’m asking if you’ve ever been in trouble with the law. A straight answer will make this go quicker and smoother for the both of us.”

  “Sure, I’ve been in trouble with the law, detective. Aren’t all cats in some trouble at some point in their life?”

  “What sort of trouble were you in?”

  “I got jealous of my boyfriend talking to another feline and I didn’t handle it very well.”

  “How did you handle it, ma’am?”

  She sighed, becoming increasingly frustrated. “I gave him a claw across the face. He called the cops.”

  “How long they put you up for that?”

  “I just got slapped with community service.”

  I nodded, impressed. Our justice system at work. “Got off lucky, then. No more trouble with the law before or after that?”

  “No, sir.”

  “You’re sure about that?”

  “I’m sure.”

  I looked down at my watch. “Are you sure, Molly? Maybe if I give you a minute or two to think about it you’ll remember.”

  Her eyes go wide. “No, Robby!”

  11

  I turned around in time to see a broom handle coming square at me. I got careless, wasn't watching my six. I took a lick to the back of the head, and it staggered me for a not-so-brief moment. When I finally came to, I grabbed the handle on the next swing. I wrestled with Robby on the hardwood floor while Molly screamed like a maniac. It was enough to make the kid lose his nerve and let go of the handle. I gave him a quick jab to the gut with the broom handle for good measure.

  “Still think I’m a cop?”

  He struggled to catch his breath. Not sure he would have said anything even if he could. He got to his feet after a moment, taking off out the door. Molly looked on, her paws covering her gaping mouth.

  “You ready to give it to me straight now, ma'am?”

  “I took some jewelry, alright? I took it. I have it all right here! Come and look!”

  I cautiously followed her into her bedroom, awaiting another feeble ambush. She pulled out a brown box from underneath her bed. Finally, we’re getting somewhere. I would be glad to get this case over with sooner than later. She took the lid off the box and I peered inside. There were two pairs of earrings and one small ring, but no collar.

  “You sure this is all of it? You don't have more stashed away elsewhere?” I inquired.

  “No, sir. This is all if it. You’ve gotta believe me. I want rid of it. Call the cops if you want.”

  I sighed, waving my paw dismissively. “I believe you, but I'll be taking this back with me. Hope you'll forgive the intrusion, ma’am.” I turned and walked out the door with the box in tow after pulling my hat and coat off the rack.

  I had only just stepped out the door when a sharp left hook caught me right in the jaw, forcing me to drop the box. On instinct, I countered with a left hook of my own that hit home, bringing this strange cat to his knees. I felt a sharp pain in my side as I took a kick to the ribs. This scrap got serious; I was in some real trouble. I snuck a quick glance over my shoulder. It was Robby behind me. Must’ve grabbed a pal.

  I sank my teeth into Robby’s shoulder, and he let out a terrible squall and swiped me good in the face with those claws out. Thankfully, on the already blind side. I knocked him to the floor and gave him a swift kick to the kisser. I snatched the jewelry quick as I could and sped off.

  I ran as fast as my feet could carry me. Wobbled and staggered about like I was running in a strong wind. Just a couple of alley cats roughed me up good. Talk about a blow to the ego. Maybe Rico was wrong. Maybe I’d listened to too many detective shows on the radio. Maybe I was only cut out for the small times after all.

  I finally made it back to the office, stumbling inside.

  “Mr. Trigger!” Zelda jumped up from her desk.

  “I’m alright. Tell anyone who calls or comes in that I’ll be back tomorrow.”

  I retreated into my office and locked the door. I had to get my head together. Man, this blow to the head would make for one whale of a bump. Seemed this one was a little worse than something I would normally sleep off. I looked down at the intercom, but my vision went blurry. I pressed the button, then blacked out.

  12

  I woke up to the sound of machines beeping. Zelda was sitting in the corner, while a dog in a white coat stood over me.

  “Mr. Trigger? Mr. Trigger? I think he’s waking up,” a voice declared.

  I squinted and tried to sit up, only to have a pair of paws gently, yet forcefully push me back down.

  “Mr. Trigger, you’re in a hospital. You need to relax. Lie back.”

  “What’s the damage, doc?” I asked.

  “A slight concussion which caused some swelling. That’s why you passed out. You’ve got lacerations—”

  “Am I going to make it, doc?” I asked, only managing a weak chuckle before the pain set in.

  He sighed. “You'll make it, Mr. Trigger, but you need to take your injuries more seriously. The swelling isn’t too bad and is going down nicely, but you’d be doing a favor for your life expectancy if you stay out of brawls. For a couple of weeks at the very least.”

  “Good, fetch my papers so I can get going. I’m sure this’ll cost an arm and a leg. I’m already down to one eye, so I’d rather keep the other along with all my limbs, if you don’t mind.”

  “Alright, but there’s an officer waiting outside. He said he needs to speak to you before you leave.”

  “Great. I can feel that headache coming back already,” I muttered.

  The doctor walked out of the room, closing the door behind him.

  “Sorry, Mr. Trigger. I panicked. I—”

  “That’s enough of that, Zelda. You did what you had to do. I’m not cross with you. Don’t worry.”

  A knock came at the door.

  “Come in,” I said.

  The door opened and a familiar face walked inside. A medium-sized dog, mostly white with brown and black patches on his fur.

  “Sergeant.” I nodded.

  He pointed to the rank on his uniform to silently correct me.

  “Oh, Colonel now, huh? My mistake. I didn’t know I’d be getting a visit from a celebrity.”

  Me and Patches never really got along, but he was one of the precious few straight clean cops on the force. I heard he defended me when the whole incident at the department went down. I hadn’t seen him since just before that.

  “Trigger. Good to see you still have a knack for getting yourself into bad situations… and you still have that same smart mouth, too. You still don’t know when to hold and when to fold. Sometimes it’s a good idea not to run that mouth of yours, you know?”

  “Thanks for the advice, mom. You come in here to bring me flowers and gab all day, or you got something you need to ask?”

  “I overheard dispatch send
ing the rescue dogs over to your place. I thought I’d check in.”

  “They send a colonel to do that now?”

  “Look, we had our differences, but you were a good cop. You should come by the station sometime. I’ve got a little more weight to throw around these days, so I might just be able to get your badge back.”

  I couldn’t help but laugh. It looked like he has always had the same opinion of me as I did of him. Not a lot of love, but certainly plenty of respect.

  “No thanks, Colonel. I appreciate you still thinking about me though. I really do. But why don’t we just get that statement out of the way.”

  “Give it some thought.”

  He handed me a clipboard and a pen. I filled out all the information I had on Robby and Molly, and the stranger at the door. As well as I could remember, at least. I handed it back.

  “This doesn’t say anything about why you were there.”

  “Client confidentiality. My lips are sealed,” I said, making the motion to zip up my mouth.

  “Alright, I can’t make you give it up. What do you want to do about pressing charges?”

  “Pick them up and have a good talk. They seemed like decent enough kids, just scared to death of cops. We both know why.”

  He nodded. “Alright. So, no charges?”

  “No charges.”

  “Take care of yourself, Trigger. Call us next time. We’ll back you up.”

  “Give me your card, Colonel. I might call you, but just you and those you trust.”

  He handed me his card and left the room. The nurse came in a few minutes later, giving me my discharge papers complete with instructions on caring for my injuries. She said to take it easy for a couple of weeks. Yeah, right. I tossed those doctor’s orders in the bin on my way out. I didn’t have time to take it easy. I had work to do.

  13

  The next morning, I had Zelda ring up Lily, asking her to stop by the office. She showed up a short while later and Zelda buzzed her on in.

  “Oh, detective, you look terrible! Are you alright?” Lily asked, seeming genuinely concerned.

  “I’m alright now. Cost me a visit to the hospital. I think it warrants a renegotiation of the agreement, but we’ll get to that in a minute. I got all this, believe it or not, courtesy of that maid of yours. Well, her boyfriend anyways,” I explained.

  “Oh, no! She didn’t show up for work this morning. What happened?”

  “Turns out she’d nabbed something from your stash—”

  “My collar!”

  I frowned and shook my head.

  “No, ma’am. I’m afraid not.” I reached into my desk, pulled out an envelope, and handed it to her. She opened it, pulling out the earrings and ring.

  “Yes. Yes, these are mine. I hadn’t noticed them missing. I just-”

  “Yeah?”

  “I just can’t believe she stole them. It saddens me to think I may have to be more guarded.”

  “The kid don’t have it easy. The harder somebody’s got it, the harder it is not to resort to unsavory means to getting a full stomach. It shows you the true colors of a cat or dog. You see how they are when things are rough. If it’s any consolation, she seemed to be remorseful. Whether it was because she got caught or because she realized it was the wrong thing to do, I couldn’t say.”

  “Yes, that’s true… but as far as payment goes, I’m afraid that I can’t spare more than what I’ve already advanced you.”

  “You know, for such a good girl, Lily, you sure attract a lot of trouble. That two hundred you gave me will probably barely cover the hospital bill. Then I’m in the hole for my time after that. I’m afraid I’m out if we’re not talking seven hundred for the deal, and another two hundred up front.”

  “You can’t do that, detective. We had a deal and—”

  “And what, Lily,” I barked. “Riddle me this, if you would. Suppose you go to your favorite burger joint and order a burger. You pay at the register, right? Suppose you get home and discover the burger looks like it saw the oven this time last year. And the bread’s moldy too. Do you say, ‘Oh well, I guess we had a deal?’”

  “Well, no, I—”

  “Well, I got news for you, sister. That same principle applies here. I got my melon cracked on account of this case, and I rent this building. So, I can’t work for peanuts, but that’s not even the issue here, since I don’t need to explain my expenses to you. All I need to do is do the job you hired me for, and all you need to do is pay me for it.”

  “Alright. I understand. Another one hundred up front and I’ll owe you three hundred more when the job is done.” She reluctantly reached into her purse and pulled out another one-hundred-dollar bill, handing it across.

  “I said two hundred.”

  Why keep making a show of holding back on the cash? Even a blind dog could see that she was loaded.

  She dug into her purse and pulled out another bill. “Oh, yes. My apologies.”

  I took the bills and placed them in my pocket. “So, who else did you say had access to the room?”

  “Just some members of my family. No one who would take anything that didn’t belong to them.”

  This dame was way too trusting for her own good. “Do you remember what you said about the maid just the other day?”

  “Yes. I suppose you’re right, detective. Just my brother and my aunt.” She hung her head and her voice got quieter.

  “Either of them have cause for taking the collar?”

  “No cause that comes to mind. No. Wait. Now that I think about it, my aunt Agatha wanted the collar when my mother passed!”

  I tilted my head. “Why’s that?”

  “I think they shared the collar when they were children, so she thought it best that the collar goes to her.”

  “Bad enough to steal it?”

  “Oh, goodness no. Oh… Well… Oh, I just don’t know anymore! Perhaps? I don’t even want to think about it.” She cried and tried rubbing the tears away with her paws.

  I took a tissue out of the box that sat on my desk, handing it to her. “I’ll stop by to see her tomorrow.”

  “Should I let her know to expect you?”

  “No, it would be best if you didn’t. Just leave her address with Zelda on your way out. Let’s hope your aunt doesn’t give me a beating. Not sure I can take another one so soon.”

  To my surprise, she laughed. “Let’s hope not. I’m not sure I could afford it.”

  14

  The next morning I skimmed the paper to look for particular “mishaps.” There was nothing out of the ordinary, but plenty of mishaps. Oh, and there was Robby. “Assault with a deadly weapon. Charges likely to be dropped.” Enough of that drivel.

  I collected my coat and hat, setting out for the Rose Garden Estates to see Agatha.

  As I made my way closer, the reality hit me that I was severely underdressed for this place. I'd heard of this neck of the woods, but I never went to visit it in person. It was one of those high-class neighborhoods you had to pay to visit if you didn’t live there. The was a hulking hound at a booth who had to open a gate and let you inside for five dollars. What a rip-off, but hopefully an investment that paid off. Too bad Lily didn’t mention that up front. Was probably afraid I would ask for more of an advance to cover it. I would have.

  After taking a few turns down the winding streets I finally arrived at my destination. What a place. Somehow, I expected Lily’s place probably wasn’t too much different. Could’ve been in this same neighborhood, for all I knew. Most likely. Funny how these rich types hold on to a dime tighter than a mother holds onto a newborn pup.

  This looked like a house you’d see on those checkout line magazine covers. The ones for dames to get and then show their husbands. It let him know what kind of home she’d like to move into someday. Just a lot of big dreams. I never was a fan of selling people on the big dreams like that. Some people get a house like that, but the vast majority of people in this city will never lay eyes on one in person.
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br />   I knocked on the door.

  A Doberman in a black uniform answered. “Yes?”

  “I’m here to see Agatha. She in?”

  “Yes.”

  I stared at her for a moment, waiting for an invitation inside. All she did was stare back. After a few seconds, I gave up on the uncomfortable silence.

  “Can I see her? I need to ask her some questions.”

  “Are you soliciting?”

  “No, I’m a private detective.”

  This dame’s stare was like getting a cold bucket of ice water dumped on your head. It chilled you to the bone.

  “You should know the Madam has very little patience for uninvited guests, sir.”

  “Could you let her know Trigger is here to see her? I’ll keep it brief.”

  “One moment.”

  She stepped inside, and I waited at the door for a few minutes. I sat on the steps and looked around to amuse myself. Never saw the appeal in a place like this. Seemed like a great place for folks who thoroughly enjoyed being bored out of their minds. No pups or kittens playing in the yard, no bars or movie theaters nearby. Just other elderly dogs who also don’t like visitors. When I get old, I want to keep doing what I was doing, just maybe a little slower and with more notes. If I managed to get old, that is.

  “Mr. Trigger, please come in.”

  I walked in, and she took my coat and hat. After hanging them up, she motioned for me to follow her into the next room. It was like you’d imagine the living room of a wealthy old dog to look. Fancy paintings, rugs, glass tables. Nothing was out of place. Not a speck of dust to be seen anywhere. The silverware was probably real silver. Fine china was on display in dark wood cabinets. It was like no one actually lived here, this was just a model house for those magazine covers.

  “Have you had your coffee this morning, sir?” The voice of an elderly dog coming from a chair on the other side of the room startled me. The back of the chair was facing me.

  “I have, ma’am, thank you. I’d be happy to have another,” I replied.

  “Lady, please pour our guest a cup of coffee,” the elderly dog said.