A Better Man

by Candis Terry

  “Hey.” He didn’t give her the opportunity to do otherwise when he captured her face between his hands. “What’s going on?”

  “I don’t know what you mean. I’ve had a lovely time. I’ve thanked you. And I expect now you’ll want to take me home.”

  “Is that what you want me to do?” He didn’t understand the sudden disconnect. He thought they’d been having a good time. Now she’d flipped a switch and seemed ready to run like a rabbit back to her hidey-­hole. “Talk to me, Lucy. What’s going on inside that head of yours?”

  “It’s been a long day for me. I’m not used to all . . . this.” She waved her arm at the room. “I think it would probably be a good idea for you to take me home. Or I can call a cab.”

  “Do we even have cabs in Sunshine?” He was joking, but clearly she wasn’t in the mood.

  “I can find a ride,” she insisted.

  “If that’s what you really want, I’ll take you.”

  “That’s what I really want.”

  “Why?”

  She looked up at him, obviously confused. “Why what?”

  “Why do you want to run? Weren’t you having a good time?”

  “Yes, but . . . if you must know, because I’m quite sure you’ve never dealt with it in your entire life, rejection is a hard pill to swallow.”

  “Rejection?”

  “See.” She looked away again. “I knew you wouldn’t understand the concept.”

  “Is that what you think I’m doing?”

  “I offered to . . .”

  He took her by the shoulders and forced her to look at him. “I don’t want you to offer anything because you think you owe me something, Lucy. You owe me nothing. If you’re going to kiss me, I want you to do it because you feel compelled to do so. Because you can’t stand it another minute unless you make it happen.”

  He caught her by surprise when he wrapped his arm around her, brought her up hard against his body, and pressed his mouth to hers. Their tongues danced and tangled and she tasted just as sweet and enticing as she had moments before. He pressed her hand against his erection and her gasp ended the kiss.

  She looked up at him, clearly surprised by his action.

  He was surprised too.

  He’d never had to try so hard to convince a woman he was interested and he couldn’t understand why Lucy didn’t get it. Usually all it took was a smile and a wink. Lucy was complicated. And for the life of him, he didn’t know how else to get his point across.

  “What you’re feeling isn’t a man who’s rejecting you, Lucy. That’s coming from a man who wants you but is trying his damnedest to behave like a gentleman. So if you want me to take you home, I will. But I’m hoping you’ll stay.”

  Her dark eyes searched his face like she was looking for some hidden message. “You want me?”

  “Yes. Why does that surprise you?”

  “Because . . .” A harsh bark of laughter pushed through her lips. “I’m me.”

  Jordan had tried not to think too much about her past. Before he’d returned home, he never considered how much a person’s past defined their present and future. He was quickly learning how much it mattered. With Lucy, the answers were becoming apparent. And he did not like what he saw.

  “You were married,” he said. “Surely you’ve had a man desire you so much he can’t think of anything but you.”

  “Yes. I was married. But I can assure you, the last thing my ex ever thought of was me.”

  He grabbed their dessert-­filled plates. “Come on. Let’s go sit down. I’d hate to waste all this. Unless you really would rather I take you home.”

  She eyed the chocolate-­covered treats. “I didn’t get to taste the Rice Krispies.”

  Relief washed over him and he smiled. He’d talked her into staying. Now hopefully he could get her to open up about what had gone wrong in her marriage. Not only because he wanted to know her better, but because he couldn’t imagine a man not being obsessed with her body, mind, and soul.

  Lucy bit into the chocolate-­covered treat and knew that once she started devouring the sugary delights, she’d have a hard time stopping. Especially if it delayed her having to answer the questions she knew were on the tip of Jordan’s tongue.

  She’d never had a man blatantly admit that he wanted her.

  Scratch that.

  She’d never had a man tell her he wanted her, period.

  It was new, uncharted territory. And as much as it intimidated her, it also delivered a powerful punch of yearning. It went without saying that Jordan Kincade was the most attractive man she’d ever met, but the closer she got, the more she realized it was the heart of the man that might very well be his most appealing quality.

  To say she’d been shocked when he’d placed her hand on his sizable erection would be an understatement. It had been a blunt, bold move. It had also intrigued her and fed into the fantasies she’d had since he’d first walked through her classroom door. What would it be like to be made love to by a man like him?

  “Which one is your favorite?” he asked, licking marshmallow and chocolate off his thumb.

  Did watching him lick marshmallow and chocolate off his fingers count?

  “It’s a toss-­up. The Krispies treats call to my inner child who never had such luxuries. But the strawberries are just so . . . decadent. What’s your favorite?”

  “Watching you eat the decadent strawberries.”

  “I don’t know what to say to that, Mr. Kincade. You keep catching me off guard.”

  “Then my plan is working, Ms. Diamond.” The genuine smile he gave her put her completely at ease. “I’d really like to get to know you better. To know what went wrong with your marriage.”

  At ease until he said that.

  “Why is it so important to you?”

  “Because you’re important to me, Lucy. Don’t you get that?”

  As much as their past history said otherwise, she wanted to believe him.

  “Never mind. I don’t want to pressure you.” He stood and held out his hand as if he understood how difficult the topic might be for her. “So how about we dance?”

  Christina Aguilera’s “Beautiful” played softly through the speakers, and Lucy had to wonder who’d put together this wonderfully romantic mix of music. Anxious to break the tension of the conversation, she wiped her hands with the cloth napkin, then placed her hand in his.

  Instead of leading her out to the dance floor, he took her in his arms right there by the table. He held her close, and for maybe the very first time in her life she felt safe.

  Jordan knew he’d pushed her too hard. He hadn’t brought her here tonight, hadn’t jumped through all the hoops to make tonight happen, just to interrogate her. If he could take back the last part of the conversation, he would. He liked the feel of her in his arms and he didn’t want her running off anywhere because he’d opened his big mouth and stuck his entire size 13½ foot inside.

  “We met during the last semester of college.” She said the words so quietly he barely heard her over the music. “At first I didn’t really notice him because I was focused on graduating at the top of my class. Next thing I knew he was in one of my study groups. Then he came into the bookstore where I worked.”

  Jordan tried to get her to look up at him, but she kept her cheek firmly planted on his chest as she continued.

  “We met a couple of times after I got off work and he talked me into going out with him on an actual date. He was handsome, and charming, and his family was very wealthy from old money. In the town where they live they were like the Kennedys—­almost royalty. I’d never had a man pay attention to me before and I’m ashamed to say he literally swept me off my feet.”

  “I don’t know why you’d be ashamed.”

  “Because I only knew him for a short time before he asked me to move in
with him after graduation.”

  “That’s nothing to be ashamed of, Lucy.”

  “I’m ashamed of the string of bad decisions I made. I’m ashamed that I let my inexperience lead me instead of the intelligence I always depended on. I didn’t really know him. Yet six weeks later we got married in a small ceremony. With my student loans I couldn’t afford a lavish wedding and his family didn’t want to shell out for it either. Later I found out that was because I was his second wife and they’d shelled out big bucks for a ceremony that included over five hundred guests.”

  “Five hundred? Wow.”

  “Imagine that. Married, divorced, and remarried before you were even twenty-­five. I completely ignored the red flag waving in front of my face.”

  “Sometimes it’s hard to see clearly when you’re too close to the subject.”

  “Maybe. But I’ve always been proud of my intellect. I’d always done well in school. It was just real life I had trouble with.”

  “That’s just being human.”

  “No. That’s being blind and stupid. Three months after the wedding I realized why he wanted to marry me.”

  “Because you’re a wonderful person?”

  “Because I was easy prey. It was then I took to hiding a rescue card in my shoe.”

  His stomach tightened and turned. “A rescue card?”

  “It has the name and number of someone you can call who will come rescue you if the abusive relationship you’re in becomes life-­threatening and you finally gather the courage to get out.”

  Jordan sucked in a breath. His feet stopped moving but he didn’t let her go. He fought for a living with men who could hold their own. Striking a woman for any reason was just wrong.

  “Fear and shame got the best of me.” She leaned back and finally looked up at him. “It took me three years to finally make that call.”

  “I’m so glad you made it out.” The desire to find this guy and beat him to a pulp lived and breathed like a flash fire in Jordan’s soul. Instead, he drew Lucy back into his arms and hugged her tight.

  She should have kept her mouth shut.

  When Jordan took her home, she wrung her hands. Fiddled with her grandmother’s ring. Straightened the layers and layers of dress ruffles like it mattered.

  Now he knew.

  Many people judged a woman who was or had been in an abusive relationship. They often thought she either was too stupid to get out or had asked for it. Lucy wondered about Jordan’s take. Did he think she’d asked for it because she’d stayed? Or that she was stupid? Or weak? Her entire life flashed before her, and until recently it was a pathetic script. It might have taken her a while, but she’d finally taken control. And she was proud of her accomplishments.

  “Stop fidgeting.”

  Jordan’s tone held no censure. Instead his words were delivered with a smile she could see even through the darkness of the SUV’s interior.

  “I can’t help it. I always fidget when I’m nervous.”

  “It’s the end of our date, what could you possibly have to be nervous about now?”

  Duh should have been enough of an explanation. But no, Lucy just had to open her big yap . . . again.

  “I know you did this whole prom thing because you thought you needed to make up for graduation night. But you didn’t. I appreciate your efforts and it was wonderful. But somewhere during the night I forgot that the whole thing was just an apology. I had fun. But everyone knows on a first date you don’t tell a person you’re interested in all your deepest, darkest secrets. I should have kept my mouth shut.”

  The SUV rolled to a stop in front of her house. Mortified, she grabbed the door handle. His big hand reached across all those lavender ruffles and stopped her. His gorgeous face was inches from her own and she felt a blush of embarrassment creep up her cheeks.

  “You’re interested in me?” he asked.

  “Is that all you heard?”

  “No.” He smiled. “I also heard you say you had fun.”

  “I did.”

  “Good to know. Stay right there.” He got out of the SUV, came around to her side, opened the door, and held out his hand. “A date doesn’t end until the gentleman walks the lady to her door.”

  “You don’t have to do that.”

  “You’re right. I don’t have to. I get to.” He waved his hand, encouraging her to take it.

  When she finally did, he helped her from the car, tucked her hand in the crook of his arm, and walked her up the path that split her small front yard. Then he waited until she unlocked her door.

  Key in hand, she turned to thank him. “It really was a wonderful night. And I’m sorry I—­”

  Gently he cupped her face between his large hands, then lowered his head and pressed his lips to hers. The kiss was slow and sweet. He tasted like rich chocolate and leashed passion as his tongue stroked hers in a sensuous rhythm that lit a fire down deep. As she clutched her hands in the lapels of his tux, she knew she wanted—­needed—­more.

  Too soon he lifted his head and while he still framed her face between his hands, she licked the delicious taste of him from her lips.

  “Never apologize, Lucy.” His dark blue gaze looked right into her eyes. “Not for who you are, who you’ve been, or what you’ve been through.”

  He kissed her again. Briefly. “I think you’re an incredible woman. And I’m damn happy you’re interested in me. Because I sure as hell am interested in you.”

  “Jordan, I—­”

  His lips came down on hers again and he swept her up in another wave of want and need. She was just about to pull him inside the house when the kiss ended, his hands slipped from her face, and he took a step back.

  “Sweet dreams, Lucy. Don’t think about the bad stuff. It’s all behind you now.”

  He gave her a smile before he turned and walked back down her pathway. Before he got in the SUV, he stopped and said, “A woman like you deserves to be treated well because she matters. You matter to me, Lucy.”

  As he drove away, any remaining ice around her heart completely melted.

  Chapter 10

  Jordan parked the SUV at his grandfather’s cabin. Instead of going inside, he walked behind the brick structure to the creek, which flowed at full capacity from the spring snowmelt and rains. Moonlight filtered through the trees and dotted the dirt pathway with dancing light. He reached up and undid his tie as he walked and listened to the water tumble over rocks and sand to clear his head. Before he knew it he found himself strolling up and down the rows of Chardonnay and Riesling grapevines.

  When he’d been a kid he enjoyed this place because of the adventures he and his brothers had. But when his grandparents passed away and his family relocated here he’d felt no real connection. If he had to be honest, a part of that came from him not wanting to move from the East Coast, where hockey rated higher on the sports ladder than pro football. As a teenager he’d never been around long enough to get to know Sunshine Valley well. Maybe if he’d gotten his hands dirty in the soil that grew the grapes that made the wine, he would have found that bond. Hard to say.

  Except for hockey he’d never really made a deep connection with anything other than his family before.

  The events of the past few weeks had changed everything.

  With his family he was trying to make up for lost time. With his sister he was trying to step up and be the good big brother he should have been all these years. With Lucy he’d started out trying to make up for the way he’d blown her off on their graduation night, but his feelings for her were transforming into something bigger than he’d ever imagined.

  The dark situation Lucy had been in for so long haunted him to the core. Not only because of how horrible it must have been for her, but also because he couldn’t ignore the part he might have played in her marrying such a mean son of a bitch. Maybe if he’d actu
ally taken her out on graduation night like he should have, she would have believed she had more value than to ever get involved with someone like that.

  The possibility weighed heavy in his chest. But it had nothing to do with the way he saw her now or the way she made him feel.

  His sister had some serious issues he needed to figure the hell out. Fast. He worried about her. She seemed so miserable. So breakable. And because he didn’t know her well enough, he worried she might do something to harm herself.

  A shiver ran down his back at the horrible thought.

  And then there was the fact that someone had been stealing from his parents. Who would have done such a thing? And why? His parents had been warm, generous people. If someone had been in need, all they’d had to do was ask for help.

  He wished they were here now. He could use a little parental advice. A little nudge in the back and a pat on the head that told him he was doing the right thing.

  God, he missed them.

  An ache filled his chest and his eyes watered. If he could just have a few minutes with them again to tell them he loved them.

  “What the hell are you doing out here?”

  Jordan wiped his eyes and looked up to find Ethan strolling toward him.

  “Trying to work some shit out in my head. What are you doing?”

  “I heard your SUV pull up but didn’t hear the cabin door close.” Ethan shrugged his broad shoulders. “I got worried.”

  His baby brother had always been the most sensitive of their motley crew. Ethan had been the one they all thought would set down roots, marry young, and have a bunch of kids running around. But the girl he’d loved had broken his heart and Ethan had gone in a direction opposite of settling down.

  “No need to worry,” Jordan said. “I’ve just got a bunch of stuff to figure out.” Like the string of text messages he’d been receiving from his agent and coach.

  “Yeah?” Ethan gave him a crooked grin. “Well, you’re getting your shiny shoes muddy out here. So what’s with the tux?”