My angels…my angels have been asked to leave. I reach for their hands as they go out the door. Now I feel alone in a room full of people. I lay here trying to comprehend what is going on. Where am I? How did I get here? What is wrong with me? Why am I tied down?
A nurse comes in to check the IVs that seem to be stuck in every vein. Someone shines a light in my eyes.
“You are going to be alright, honey. Everything’s going to be alright.” The bright light disappears and my eyes adjust to the room. Where are my angels?
“Where did my angels go.” I finally mutter.
“What, Honey?”
“The angels, the beautiful angels? qct The ones holding my hands?” I slur.
“Oh, you are talking about Brad and Dylan, the two good-looking young men that were sitting next to you when you woke up?”
I couldn’t help beaming. “The angels.”
“I guess you can call them that. They haven’t left your side since you have been here.” The nurse fastens a fresh IV bag on the hook. “They will be in shortly. I just need to run a few tests and check your vitals first.”
When they come back in the room, the white illuminating light doesn’t surround them anymore. I’ve already forgotten their names, but even without the white glow they are still captivating.
One of them looks like a Roman sculpture. Why do I remember there are masterpieces in Italy and yet I can’t remember my own name? He comes to the bed. His chocolate brown eyes look into my soul and his defined cheek bones seem more pronounced every time he speaks. I like the way he calls me baby. I have no idea who he is.
I examine the other man entering the room behind him. He’s extremely attractive as well. His dark hair makes his blue eyes pop, and his tender stare makes me feel comfortable around him, even though he’s a stranger too…Angels. My guardian angels.
“Nicole, oh my god, you are awake.”
“Nicole?” I tilt my head as I repeat the word.
“That is your name sweetheart,” the nurse confirms. She pulls them to the side but I can still hear her. “She has amnesia boys. It may be temporary, but with a trauma like she’s had, she may have permanent memory loss. We will just have to pray.”
“Do you know who I am?” One of the men leans over me.
“She thinks you boys are her angels. I’ll let you spend some time with her. But you know the rules. You will have to take shifts again. We need to have her evaluated for speech therapy so she doesn’t slur her words and physical therapy when she is up to it. It is a miracle, boys. It is a miracle.” The nurse smiles and closes the door behind her.
“Do you know who I am?”
I tilt my head, looking at the face of the Roman statue. Nothing. I shake my head.
“How about me? Do you remember me?” I stare into his blue eyes but don’t remember either and shake my head again.
Chapter 11
“You’re alive,” he whispered, almost as if he didn’t believe it. “You’re alive.”
~Dylan
Obsession and Sacrifice
Tiffany Carmouché
*Nicole*
In the week that followed, they gave me speech drills, and puzzles to test comprehension. The doctor came in to evaluate me and reminded me he scheduled physical therapy in the morning to test my strength. With each day my slur became less pronounced and I finally graduated to real people food. I lifted myself up, pushing against the bed so I could sit up. As I did, the tubes pinched at my veins causing a little discomfort but nothing I couldn’t live with.
According to the monitor next to my bed, apparently I was still alive. I guessed that was a good thing, but I felt imprisoned by all the crap hooked up to my body and all the blinking machines that told me I was not dead.
The nurse walked into the room with my dinner. My stomach was growling, so even though the food tasted like cardboard, I welcomed the visit.
“Good evening, Nicole. Wow, this is the first time I have seen you without one of your gentlemen friends by your bedside.”
I timidly bit back the corners of my mouth from lifting, trying not to expose my secret desire for them to return. “I woke up from my nap and I was alone.” I paused for a moment and then blurted it out. “Do you know them, Vera? Do you know anything about them?”
“I know one of them has been here 24/7 since the ambulance brought you into the hospital. I can tell they both worship you. You are a lucky girl to have people care for you so much.”
“I don’t know. I-I…do you think I will ever remember?”
“Honey, every patient is different. Do you remember anything, Nicole?”
“I don’t even feel like a Nicole, but apparently that is my name. I can’t remember anything before waking up here. They are so sweet--they must have meant something to me--but Vera, I have no clue who they are, or how I met them. What do I do? I want to remember. What can I do to remember?”
“Like I said, it is different with every patient. Do you want them around? Are they bothering you?” She put the plastic tray of food in front of me.
“No, no it’s nothing like that. I don’t know…but look at me. I’m a mess.” I held out my unmanicured hands with the tubes jammed into my veins. “They are both really cute and I look like…I mean, look at me. My hair is all crazy, my face is bruised and look at all these ugly scars. I guess, in a way I would prefer to be ugly all by myself. I really don’t want people to see me like this. Does that make any sense?”
“Sure it does. If you want me to ask them not to visit, I can do that. But Nicole, they are the only ones who know anything about you prior to the accident. They may be the only people who can help you unlock the past.”
“I just hate that I’m so weak. I hate that I need help to go to the bathroom. I hate that I can’t get up and make my own food. I hate that everything is a blur. I’m pathetic.”
“Honey, you just got out of a coma. Be happy you are alive. Give yourself a little credit. Look, you’re able to eat by yourself now. A week ago, we fed you through an IV.”
It didn’t seem like that much of an accomplishment. I looked at the plastic tray in front of me. It had a strange odor, but I wouldn’t complain. She was right. I was progressing. At least one of my tubes had been removed!
A gentle knock tapped the door. It cracked open and his face peeked through. “Can I come in or am I disturbing anything?” All of a sudden this aroma filled the air. I couldn’t explain it but it smelled so good. I squinted my eyes to concentrate, but I couldn’t figure out what it was or where it was coming from.
The roman soldier guy entered the room. His figure took up most of the doorway. I held back my smile. I liked the way he looked. His face had tiny scruffy whiskers breaking through his skin. I bet the stubble would be fun to rub my hand across, but I dared not try. In his arms he held a huge box. I wondered what hid inside.
Vera leaned over to me, “Should I ask him to leave?” she whispered. I shook my head no, like a little girl not wanting to give up her new toy pony. She winked at me and closed the door as she left.
I don’t know why he made me nervous. As he came closer, I took a deep breath. His face lit up. What was his name? I should have asked Vera. God, what was his name? He put the big box on the seat beside me. It smelled really good. The scent of his cologne--mmm intoxicating, but this, this new smell--what could it be? I closed my eyes and inhaled the wonderful aroma, but I still couldn’t figure it out.
“Good evening, Nicole. It seems I’ve arrived just in time to rescue you.”
I tilted my head, questioning with my eyes. Rescue me? Can I finally escape this prison? He picked up the plastic dinner container from my tray cart and moved it to a table across the room. My stomach growled loudly, protesting, and he grinned. His smile sent a warm shiver through me, and I bit my lip, hoping
it would conceal the pleasure I felt when he looked at me. I had no idea what his name was but I liked when he was around.
He opened the box. The aroma intensified and filled the room. Immediately, a grin sprang to my lips. Did that smell come from the box?
“I tried to get them to let me take you out of here, but apparently I’m not allowed to. I even tried bribing the doctor.” He shook his head, kinda rolling his eyes, “but he would have nothing to do with it. Today at lunch, I saw you cringe at your food, and I couldn’t watch you suffer like that again.” He took a little table cloth out of the box, folding it so it would fit over my portable tray cart. He fluffed it, draping it over the top. He pulled a vase out of the magical box and placed it on the little table as well and pulled out a single long stem rose and handed it to me. “I’ve missed you, baby.”
I reached out for it, bringing it to my nose, taking in its sweetness. “It’s beautiful. Thank you.” Its red petals tickled my nose as I enjoyed its perfume. Rose, this is a rose. Why is it that I can remember the name of this flower but not remember the name of this man whose eyes look like milk chocolate? I smelled it again. “I liked these, didn’t I? I think I remember liking roses.” I gently touched my face with the petals. They were so soft. I closed my eyes, praying for a memory. None came. Silently, I put the rose in the vase, waiting to see what other treats he had hiding in his cardboard box.
“It’s hard seeing you here, Nicole. It’s hard not being able to spoil you.” He pulled a candle out and set it on the tray. “I hope the fire marshal doesn’t come in.” He grinned, lighting the candle and then walking over to the wall to turn off the lights. The lights of the obnoxious monitor were more pronounced in the dark room. But for a moment, I forgot where I was. The hospital room faded, and I focused on the candle’s flame and the touch of light that danced in his eyes as he sat on the hospital bed looking at me. He just gazed at me. I felt warmth come to my cheeks. I didn’t know what to say. I hoped for a memory, but none came. My stomach interrupted, reminding me I was hungry. He just laughed as he broke eye contact and added silverware to the tray.
“I smuggled this inside. I hope you still like it. As he lifted the china plate out of the box, the smell filled the air and my mouth watered as he put it on my little portable table now dressed so elegantly. Steak decorated the plate--apparently, one of my favorites.
Starving, I beamed. I picked up the fork and knife but was cruelly reminded I was in a hospital. The motion of cutting pulled at the lines in my veins and hurt. I flinched; they tormented me. Bound by the tubes in my hands, the gourmet meal was just there to tease me.
He must have seen the expression on my face. “Here let me do that for you.” He leaned in closer. I looked up as he cut the steak for me.
I felt like a kid. He appeared so big, so strong, so beautiful. And I felt so weak, so fragile, so helpless. I looked down, ashamed at my frailty, pouting my lip, and stupidly refused to pick up the fork and begin to eat--afraid I would embarrass myself again in front of this handsome stranger. He tried to put the fork in my hand, but stubbornly I just sat there.
He stabbed a piece of steak and brought it to my mouth. I pursed my mouth closed but some of the juices taunted my lips and seeped in, tantalizing my tongue. Not wanting to force me to eat, he took the fork away and took the bite himself.
“Mmm, this is amazing.” I stared at his mouth as he enjoyed the delicious morsel, and I licked my lips, tasting the tiny hint of flavor he left behind.
My lips parted, too shy to say how much I wanted it, but hoping he would try again. He forked another piece of meat and began to bring it to his mouth but saw the longing in my eyes.
“Do you want some?”
I opened my mouth wide, inviting him to allow me to taste it. He brought the fork to my mouth and the steak touched my tongue. I sighed in delight, the ambrosia tickling my taste buds, and as soon as I swallowed, my mouth opened inviting another piece of meat inside. The juices squirted as I chewed. So succulent--nothing like the cardboard meals I had been tortured with.
“Mmm.” I sighed involuntarily, enjoying every moment it tantalized my tongue.
Silently, he watched each time he fed me another piece and I closed my eyes to savor it. I wanted to take the fork from him and feed myself, but caught up in the pleasure he gave me with each bite, I surrendered. I opened my eyes, as he dabbed the corner of my mouth with a napkin. He seemed to get as much satisfaction from the process as I did. The moisture in his eyes glistened with the light of the flame, but he quickly wiped it away. “You’re alive,” he whispered, almost as if he didn’t believe it. “You’re alive.”
As he gazed at my lips, a tingle entered my stomach, replacing the annoying growl. He leaned in to kiss me, but I had no idea who this sexy stranger was and a kiss could open doors I wasn’t ready to enter, even though his lips looked so appetizing.
“Thank you so much.” I finally spoke.
“Anything for you, baby.” He continued to lean in slowly. My hand with all the crap hanging out of it, touched his face to stop him. The gentle fuzz tickled me. I sat for a moment and ran my hand gently over it enjoying the sensation as it pricked against my palm.
“I need to shave.” He put his hand on top of mine. Closing his eyes, he realized I wasn’t ready to enjoy his lips and kissed my hand instead.
“Can I ask you a question, and you not get mad at me?” I looked at him. The tiny flame caressed his skin.
“Of course baby, what is it?”
“I think you may get mad.”
“No, no I won’t.” He sat up, withdrawing the intimate advance.
“I feel horrible asking.”
“No, Nicole, whatever it is, you can ask.”
“I-I..I…” I wondered if I should just wait till Vera got back. She would know, but the question sprang to my lips before I convinced myself not to ask. “I wanted to know your name.”
I could tell the question stung him and he smirked awkwardly. “Dylan, my name is Dylan Richardson.”
“Dylan.” I let it sing on my lips. “Dylan.” I bit my lip. “Dylan. I like your name.”
He grabbed my hand and gently rubbed his thumb over my fingers. “I love hearing you say my name.”
“Thank you for the food, Dylan. I liked it.”
The corners of his mouth lifted. “I have more. I almost forgot.” He pulled a bottle of wine out of the box with two wine glasses. My eyes lit up.
“It’s sparkling cider--with your medicine and all…” He poured us each a glass. “To Nicole, to you waking up and making me the happiest man in the world. I thought I lost you.”
“To you, Dylan. Thank you again for a delicious meal.” Our glasses clanged and the bubbles popped in my mouth as I took the sip. It tickled my tongue. I raised my glass for him to refill it and closed my eyes to feel it sizzle in my mouth again.
“Would you like some dessert?”
“Are you trying to make me fat?” I grinned as he reached back into the box.
“Close your eyes. Let me see if you can guess what it is.”
I closed my eyes and opened my lips. The cold spoon touched my tongue bringing a sweet creamy substance into my mouth. It had a tiny tartness and its decadent flavor burst as I let it sit there for a moment to identify it.
“I taste chocolate.” I grinned. “And a tinge of strawberry. Mmm and this creaminess. It’s not cold enough to be ice cream.” I swallowed. “Let me try another.” I opened my mouth again.
“I like it, that is graham cracker right?” I beamed. This was fun. “It’s cheesecake.” I opened my eyes as if I had solved an important mystery. “It’s cheesecake.”
“Good job!” He smiled at me. “So should I be concerned you remember cheesecake but do not remember my name?”
“We’re talking cheese cake, who can ever
forget cheesecake?” A smile overtook my face as I pleaded with my eyes. “Can I have some more?”
He took another spoonful and brought it to my mouth, but as it touched my lips he pulled it away and I bit at the air. “Hey, you cheated.”
He brought it to his lips and I watched as he relished the flavor. He took another spoonful and taunted me with it, pulling it away from my lips at the last moment and making me watch him enjoy it. “So you like cheesecake, huh?” His eyes lit up.
“Dylan, you’re so bad.” I gently smacked his hand playfully.
He closed his eyes. “Say it again.”
“What?”
“My name. Say it again.”
“Dylan,… Dylan, Dylan, Dylan. Now can I have a bite?”
“It depends, are you going to remember my name?”
“Dylan!”
He brought the spoon to my mouth as if we were playing airplane with the food. The secret password--his name. With every spoonful I had to say his name before he would allow the sweet yumminess to enter my lips. I giggled feeling silly as he taunted me. “Dylan, Dylan, Dylan.”
When I finished, he stood up and leaned over, kissing my forehead. “Now there will be a pop quiz tomorrow.” He winked, putting everything back in the cardboard box. “Brad will be here soon.” He turned on the light, and let me blow out the candle.
“Brad.” I repeated putting the name to memory. “Thank you for dinner. I really enjoyed it, even though I had to work for it.”
“I’ll be back in the morning. Maybe I’ll bring pancakes.”
Someone knocked on the door and it squeaked open. “Hello?”
“Hi Brad,” I invited, feeling happy I didn’t have to admit just a few moments ago I had no idea what his name was either.
Obsession and Sacrifice (Alaska #2) Page 6
