The Skeptics Annotated Bible

by Wells, Steve

  8 And he said, Hagar, Sarai’s maid, whence camest thou? and whither wilt thou go? And she said, I flee from the face of my mistress Sarai.

  9 And the angel of the LORD said unto her, Return to thy mistress, and submit thyself under her hands.

  (16.9) “Submit thyself under her hands.” The angel tells Hagar to return and submit to her abusive owner, Sarah.

  42 Does God approve of slavery?

  10 And the angel of the LORD said unto her, I will multiply thy seed exceedingly, that it shall not be numbered for multitude.

  11 And the angel of the LORD said unto her, Behold, thou art with child, and shalt bear a son, and shalt call his name Ishmael; because the LORD hath heard thy affliction.

  12 And he will be a wild man; his hand will be against every man, and every man’s hand against him; and he shall dwell in the presence of all his brethren.

  13 And she called the name of the LORD that spake unto her, Thou God seest me: for she said, Have I also here looked after him that seeth me?

  14 Wherefore the well was called Beer-lahai-roi; behold, it is between Kadesh and Bered.

  15 And Hagar bare Abram a son: and Abram called his son’s name, which Hagar bare, Ishmael.

  (16.15) “Hagar bare Abraham a son.”

  53 How many sons did Abraham have?

  16 And Abram was fourscore and six years old, when Hagar bare Ishmael to Abram.

  (16.16) “Abraham was fourscore and six years old, when Hagar bare Ishmael.”

  48 How old was Abraham when Ishmael was born?

  GENESIS 17

  17 And when Abram was ninety years old and nine, the LORD appeared to Abram, and said unto him, I am the Almighty God; walk before me, and be thou perfect.

  (17.1) “The Lord appeared to Abraham.”

  49 Can God be seen?

  2 And I will make my covenant between me and thee, and will multiply thee exceedingly.

  3 And Abram fell on his face: and God talked with him, saying,

  (17.3) “And Abraham fell on his face.”

  4 As for me, behold, my covenant is with thee, and thou shalt be a father of many nations.

  5 Neither shall thy name any more be called Abram, but thy name shall be Abraham; for a father of many nations have I made thee.

  6 And I will make thee exceeding fruitful, and I will make nations of thee, and kings shall come out of thee.

  7 And I will establish my covenant between me and thee and thy seed after thee in their generations for an everlasting covenant, to be a God unto thee, and to thy seed after thee.

  8 And I will give unto thee, and to thy seed after thee, the land wherein thou art a stranger, all the land of Canaan, for an everlasting possession; and I will be their God.

  (17.8) “An everlasting possession” God gives Abraham and his descendants all the land of Canaan “for an everlasting possession.” This promise has inspired much of the unending strife and intolerance in the Middle East region, and it continues to do so today. Yet history and the Bible (Acts 7.5, Heb 11.13) show that this promise was not kept.

  9 And God said unto Abraham, Thou shalt keep my covenant therefore, thou, and thy seed after thee in their generations.

  10 This is my covenant, which ye shall keep, between me and you and thy seed after thee; Every man child among you shall be circumcised.

  11 And ye shall circumcise the flesh of your foreskin; and it shall be a token of the covenant betwixt me and you.

  (17.11) “Ye shall circumcise the flesh of your foreskin.”

  54 Is circumcision required?

  12 And he that is eight days old shall be circumcised among you, every man child in your generations, he that is born in the house, or bought with money of any stranger, which is not of thy seed.

  13 He that is born in thy house, and he that is bought with thy money, must needs be circumcised: and my covenant shall be in your flesh for an everlasting covenant.

  (17.13) “He that is bought with thy money”

  42 Does God approve of slavery?

  14 And the uncircumcised man child whose flesh of his foreskin is not circumcised, that soul shall be cut off from his people; he hath broken my covenant.

  (17.14) “The uncircumcised man child whose flesh of his foreskin is not circumcised, that soul shall be cut off from his people.” An uncircumcised boy is to be abandoned by his parents and community.

  15 And God said unto Abraham, As for Sarai thy wife, thou shalt not call her name Sarai, but Sarah shall her name be.

  16 And I will bless her, and give thee a son also of her: yea, I will bless her, and she shall be a mother of nations; kings of people shall be of her.

  (17.16) “I will bless her, and give thee a son also of her.” God blesses the union between Abraham and his half sister (20.12).

  55 Is incest OK?

  17 Then Abraham fell upon his face, and laughed, and said in his heart, Shall a child be born unto him that is an hundred years old? and shall Sarah, that is ninety years old, bear?

  (17.17) “Abraham fell upon his face, and laughed.” Abraham falls down laughing at God for telling him that he and Sarah will have a child, when they are 100 and 90 years old, respectively.

  18 And Abraham said unto God, O that Ishmael might live before thee!

  19 And God said, Sarah thy wife shall bear thee a son indeed; and thou shalt call his name Isaac: and I will establish my covenant with him for an everlasting covenant, and with his seed after him.

  (17.19) “I will establish my covenant with him for an everlasting covenant.”

  56 Are Old Testament laws still binding?

  20 And as for Ishmael, I have heard thee: Behold, I have blessed him, and will make him fruitful, and will multiply him exceedingly; twelve princes shall he beget, and I will make him a great nation.

  21 But my covenant will I establish with Isaac, which Sarah shall bear unto thee at this set time in the next year.

  22 And he left off talking with him, and God went up from Abraham.

  23 And Abraham took Ishmael his son, and all that were born in his house, and all that were bought with his money, every male among the men of Abraham’s house; and circumcised the flesh of their foreskin in the selfsame day, as God had said unto him.

  (17.23-27) Abraham was 99 years old when he circumcised himself, along with his 13 year old son, Ishmael, and his 318 slaves—all in one very busy (and painful) day.

  57 How old was Ishmael when he was abandoned by Abraham?

  (17.23) “Abraham took Ishmael his son, and all that were born in his house, and all that were bought with his money … and circumcised the flesh of their foreskin in the selfsame day.” (17.24) “Abraham was ninety years old and nine, when he was circumcised in the flesh of his foreskin.”

  24 And Abraham was ninety years old and nine, when he was circumcised in the flesh of his foreskin.

  25 And Ishmael his son was thirteen years old, when he was circumcised in the flesh of his foreskin.

  (17.25) “Ishmael his son was thirteen years old, when he was circumcised in the flesh of his foreskin.”

  26 In the selfsame day was Abraham circumcised, and Ishmael his son.

  27 And all the men of his house, born in the house, and bought with money of the stranger, were circumcised with him.

  (17.27) “And all the men of his house, born in the house, and bought with money of the stranger, were circumcised with him.”

  GENESIS 18

  18 And the LORD appeared unto him in the plains of Mamre: and he sat in the tent door in the heat of the day;

  (18.1) “The Lord appeared unto him.” Abraham feeds God and three angels.

  49 Can God be seen?

  2 And he lift up his eyes and looked, and, lo, three men stood by him: and when he saw them, he ran to meet them from the tent door, and bowed himself toward the ground,

  3 And said, My Lord, if now I have found favour in thy sight, pass not away, I pray thee, from thy servant:

  4 Let a little water, I pray you, be fetched, and
wash your feet, and rest yourselves under the tree:

  5 And I will fetch a morsel of bread, and comfort ye your hearts; after that ye shall pass on: for therefore are ye come to your servant. And they said, So do, as thou hast said.

  6 And Abraham hastened into the tent unto Sarah, and said, Make ready quickly three measures of fine meal, knead it, and make cakes upon the hearth.

  7 And Abraham ran unto the herd, and fetcht a calf tender and good, and gave it unto a young man; and he hasted to dress it.

  8 And he took butter, and milk, and the calf which he had dressed, and set it before them; and he stood by them under the tree, and they did eat.

  (18.8) “He took butter, and milk, and the calf … and they did eat.” Not a very kosher meal for God and Abraham to eat! (See Ex 23.19)

  9 And they said unto him, Where is Sarah thy wife? And he said, Behold, in the tent.

  (18.9) “Where is Sarah thy wife?”

  18 Does God know and see everything?

  10 And he said, I will certainly return unto thee according to the time of life; and, lo, Sarah thy wife shall have a son. And Sarah heard it in the tent door, which was behind him.

  11 Now Abraham and Sarah were old and well stricken in age; and it ceased to be with Sarah after the manner of women.

  12 Therefore Sarah laughed within herself, saying, After I am waxed old shall I have pleasure, my lord being old also?

  (18.12) “Therefore Sarah laughed.” Sarah, who is about 90 years old and has gone through menopause, laughs at God when he tells her that she will have a son. She asks God if she will “have pleasure” with her “lord” [Abraham], when both are so very old. God assures her that he will return and impregnate her at the appointed time.

  58 Did Sarah have faith that she would conceive?

  13 And the LORD said unto Abraham, Wherefore did Sarah laugh, saying, Shall I of a surety bear a child, which am old?

  14 Is any thing too hard for the LORD? At the time appointed I will return unto thee, according to the time of life, and Sarah shall have a son.

  (18.14) “Is any thing too hard for the Lord?”

  59 Can God do anything?

  15 Then Sarah denied, saying, I laughed not; for she was afraid. And he said, Nay; but thou didst laugh.

  16 And the men rose up from thence, and looked toward Sodom: and Abraham went with them to bring them on the way.

  17 And the LORD said, Shall I hide from Abraham that thing which I do;

  (18.17) “Shall I hide from Abraham that thing which I do?” God, who is planning another mass murder, is worried that Abraham might try to stop him. So he asks himself if he should hide his intentions from Abraham.

  18 Does God know everything?

  18 Seeing that Abraham shall surely become a great and mighty nation, and all the nations of the earth shall be blessed in him?

  19 For I know him, that he will command his children and his household after him, and they shall keep the way of the LORD, to do justice and judgment; that the LORD may bring upon Abraham that which he hath spoken of him.

  20 And the LORD said, Because the cry of Sodom and Gomorrah is great, and because their sin is very grievous;

  21 I will go down now, and see whether they have done altogether according to the cry of it, which is come unto me; and if not, I will know.

  (18.20-21) “And the Lord said … I will go down now, and see.”

  18 Does God know everything?

  22 And the men turned their faces from thence, and went toward Sodom: but Abraham stood yet before the LORD.

  23 And Abraham drew near, and said, Wilt thou also destroy the righteous with the wicked?

  24 Peradventure there be fifty righteous within the city: wilt thou also destroy and not spare the place for the fifty righteous that are therein?

  25 That be far from thee to do after this manner, to slay the righteous with the wicked: and that the righteous should be as the wicked, that be far from thee: Shall not the Judge of all the earth do right?

  (18.25) “Shall not the Judge of all the earth do right?” Abraham begs God not to kill everyone in Sodom and Gomorrah. [Which is odd, since later (22.2-10) Abraham doesn’t even question God’s request that he kill his own son.] He asks God two good questions: “Wilt thou destroy the righteous with the wicked?” and “Shall not the Judge of all the earth do right?” (The answers are “yes” and “no”, respectively.)

  26 And the LORD said, If I find in Sodom fifty righteous within the city, then I will spare all the place for their sakes.

  27 And Abraham answered and said, Behold now, I have taken upon me to speak unto the Lord, which am but dust and ashes:

  28 Peradventure there shall lack five of the fifty righteous: wilt thou destroy all the city for lack of five? And he said, If I find there forty and five, I will not destroy it.

  29 And he spake unto him yet again, and said, Peradventure there shall be forty found there. And he said, I will not do it for forty’s sake.

  30 And he said unto him, Oh let not the Lord be angry, and I will speak: Peradventure there shall thirty be found there. And he said, I will not do it, if I find thirty there.

  31 And he said, Behold now, I have taken upon me to speak unto the Lord: Peradventure there shall be twenty found there. And he said, I will not destroy it for twenty’s sake.

  32 And he said, Oh let not the Lord be angry, and I will speak yet but this once: Peradventure ten shall be found there. And he said, I will not destroy it for ten’s sake.

  (18.32) “I will not destroy it for ten’s sake.” I guess God couldn’t find even ten good Sodomites because he decides to kill them all in Genesis 19. Too bad Abraham didn’t ask God about the children. Why not save them? If Abraham could find 10 good children, toddlers, infants, or babies, would God spare the city? Apparently not. God doesn’t give a damn about children.

  33 And the LORD went his way, as soon as he had left communing with Abraham: and Abraham returned unto his place.

  (18.33) “And the Lord went his way.”

  GENESIS 19

  19 And there came two angels to Sodom at even; and Lot sat in the gate of Sodom: and Lot seeing them rose up to meet them; and he bowed himself with his face toward the ground;

  (19.1) “There came two angels to Sodom.” The two angels that visit Lot wash their feet, eat, and are sexually irresistible to Sodomites.

  2 And he said, Behold now, my lords, turn in, I pray you, into your servant’s house, and tarry all night, and wash your feet, and ye shall rise up early, and go on your ways. And they said, Nay; but we will abide in the street all night.

  3 And he pressed upon them greatly; and they turned in unto him, and entered into his house; and he made them a feast, and did bake unleavened bread, and they did eat.

  4 But before they lay down, the men of the city, even the men of Sodom, compassed the house round, both old and young, all the people from every quarter:

  5 And they called unto Lot, and said unto him, Where are the men which came in to thee this night? bring them out unto us, that we may know them.

  (19.5) “Bring them out unto us, that we may know them.” Two angels are staying at Lot’s house when all the men of Sodom come to visit. They ask Lot to bring the angels out so that they can have sex with them.

  6 And Lot went out at the door unto them, and shut the door after him,

  7 And said, I pray you, brethren, do not so wickedly.

  8 Behold now, I have two daughters which have not known man; let me, I pray you, bring them out unto you, and do ye to them as is good in your eyes: only unto these men do nothing; for therefore came they under the shadow of my roof.

  (19.8) “I have two daughters which have not known man; let me, I pray you, bring them out unto you, and do ye to them as is good in your eyes.” Lot refuses to give up his angels to the perverted mob, offering his two “virgin daughters” instead. He tells the bunch of angel rapers to “do unto them [his daughters] as is good in your eyes.” This is the same man that is called “ju
st” and “righteous” in 2 Pet 2.7-8.

  60 Was Lot a righteous man?

  9 And they said, Stand back. And they said again, This one fellow came in to sojourn, and he will needs be a judge: now will we deal worse with thee, than with them. And they pressed sore upon the man, even Lot, and came near to break the door.

  10 But the men put forth their hand, and pulled Lot into the house to them, and shut to the door.

  11 And they smote the men that were at the door of the house with blindness, both small and great: so that they wearied themselves to find the door.

  12 And the men said unto Lot, Hast thou here any besides? son in law, and thy sons, and thy daughters, and whatsoever thou hast in the city, bring them out of this place:

  13 For we will destroy this place, because the cry of them is waxen great before the face of the LORD; and the LORD hath sent us to destroy it.

  (19.13) “We will destroy this place.”

  61 Who destroyed Sodom and Gomorrah?

  14 And Lot went out, and spake unto his sons in law, which married his daughters, and said, Up, get you out of this place; for the LORD will destroy this city. But he seemed as one that mocked unto his sons in law.

  (19.14) “His sons in law, which married his daughters” Lot lied about his daughters being “virgins” in v.8. His daughters were married, and therefore not likely to be virgins. But, hey, it was a “just and righteous” lie, intended to make them more attractive to the sex-crazed mob.

  15 And when the morning arose, then the angels hastened Lot, saying, Arise, take thy wife, and thy two daughters, which are here; lest thou be consumed in the iniquity of the city.

  16 And while he lingered, the men laid hold upon his hand, and upon the hand of his wife, and upon the hand of his two daughters; the LORD being merciful unto him: and they brought him forth, and set him without the city.

  17 And it came to pass, when they had brought them forth abroad, that he said, Escape for thy life; look not behind thee, neither stay thou in all the plain; escape to the mountain, lest thou be consumed.

  18 And Lot said unto them, Oh, not so, my Lord:

  19 Behold now, thy servant hath found grace in thy sight, and thou hast magnified thy mercy, which thou hast shewed unto me in saving my life; and I cannot escape to the mountain, lest some evil take me, and I die: