“I’m still not moving in with you,” she said defiantly.
“Fine.”
“Fine?” She arched a brow.
“I’m not forcing you to live with me if it’s not what you want. But, I'm not going to stop asking you to move in, so get used to it.”
That did it—a small smile flickered across her lips.
“Are we done fighting now?” I asked.
“I don’t know. Are you done being a colossal ass?” she shot back.
“For the time being, yes.” I tipped her chin up and searched her eyes for understanding. “Do you understand how I feel for you?”
“Yes,” she said softly.
“Good.” I kissed her lightly and released her chin. “Let’s go eat so we can get into the office at a decent hour.” I smacked her on the butt and hustled her back into the kitchen.
Thirty minutes later, we were in my car on the way into the office. Grace was quiet on the drive.
“Are you still upset about earlier?” I put a hand on her knee.
“No, not upset. Just thinking.” She patted my hand.
“About?”
“This whole crazy situation. I know that you’re used to getting your way all the time, but we’re different. I’m not an employee who has to say yes when you tell them to do something. I’m your equal, your girlfriend.”
“I know that.”
“Do you?”
“Yes.” I sighed. “I’ll try harder okay?”
She nodded. The rest of the drive was quiet, but I didn’t think she was upset with me anymore.
Brooke was waiting at the elevator as usual, my messages and coffee in hand.
“Mr. McFadden, your mother and sister have both called this morning. Also Mr. Janner is in your office.” She turned to Grace. “I apologize, I didn’t realize you would be here or I would have brought you coffee as well.” I noticed her tone was cooler than it should have been. Grace gave me a look at the mention of my mother, but she didn’t say anything. I was not interested in rehashing the previous conversation.
“It’s not a problem, Brooke.” Grace smiled sweetly. “If you don't mind, I’d love a latte?”
There she was, not taking anything from anyone. So fierce. I even kind of enjoyed when she defied me.
“Of course, right away,” Brooke responded in clipped tones.
“Thanks, Brooke. We’ll be in my office for the day. I’ll be leaving tomorrow for Chicago. I’d like your decision by the end of the week about coming with me.”
“Very well.” She nodded and clicked down the hall.
“Does she always dress like that?” Grace whispered as we walked.
“Like what?” I knew exactly what she was talking about.
“Come on, Logan, her clothes are painted on.” She rolled her eyes.
“What did I say yesterday? It’s strictly professional with us.” I kissed her cheek.
“Yeah, yeah, whatever. Come on, let’s go get to packing.”
Smith was sitting at my desk on the phone when we came in.
“Shai, I’ll call you later okay?” He laughed at something she said and hung up. “It’s about time you showed up.”
“Please, by all means, use my phone and my desk,” I said dryly.
“Well, it seems someone should be using it since you’re running off to Chicago.” He grinned.
“Did you need something?”
“No, just wanted to be sure I saw you before you left.” He walked around the desk. He turned his attention to Grace. “Take care of him, will you? I know sometimes he can be an ass, but he means well.” He kissed her cheek.
“Shut up.” I laughed and hugged him. “I’ll be around. Plus I doubt I’ll be able to keep you away for long anyway. Not with so many new women for you to meet.”
“You’re not wrong there.” He flashed a grin. “I’ll see you when I see you.” He gave a quick wave and left us alone.
“Are you sad to be leaving him?” Grace asked.
“Smith? I’m not really leaving him. Like I said, he’ll be around before too long.”
We set about the task of dismantling my office. Brooke brought in some boxes at Grace’s request, and we packed as much as we could.
“I HATE PACKING. WHY IS it that I wanted to help you again?” I sat back on my heels, covered in dust.
Logan smiled. “I told you, this is why I hire people to move for me. “
“Don’t let me talk you out of it next time.”
“I hate to tell you, but this is only about a quarter of what I actually need to bring with me when we go.”
“Are you serious?” I stood up quickly.
“Afraid so. I think we can leave the rest to be packed, what do you think?”
“I think I agree with that decision.” I wiped my hands on my jeans.
“Are you hungry?” He stood and stretched.
“Ravenous. Let’s go grab some lunch.”
Logan had called down and there was a limo waiting for us at the curb. He slid in and pulled me along with him on the soft leather seat. “What are you hungry for?” He pressed his lips to my temple and settled his arm around my shoulders.
“Sandwiches and soup?”
“Out of anything you could have, you want sandwiches and soup?” He laughed.
“Yeah, do you have a problem with that?” I shot him a dirty look.
“I wouldn’t dream of it.” He looked the picture of innocence. After giving the driver instructions, he shut the privacy glass. “Am I forgiven for before? I know I’m overbearing sometimes, I’ll try my hardest to work on that.”
That surprised me. It wasn’t often that men like Logan, with the world at their fingertips, admitted to being wrong. “I’ll try to be less rigid in my expectations.” It was the least I could do. I couldn't really expect him to be everything I wanted overnight.
“Thank you.” He kissed the top of my head. “We’ll figure this all out.”
“Figure what out?”
“Being in a relationship together.” He chuckled softly. I could feel the rumble of his laugh against my back.
“You need to do that more often.” I sighed contentedly and leaned my head against him.
“Do what?”
“Laugh.” I yawned. All the packing had taken it out of me.
I must have fallen asleep because it surprised me when Logan gently shook me awake. “We’re here.”
“Sorry, didn’t mean to fall asleep.” I smiled.
“It’s more than okay. I enjoyed watching you.” He kissed me lightly.
Logan had taken me to his favorite deli. They had every kind of meat imaginable and a slew of yummy sounding soups.
After we ordered and sat down outside, I decided to resume my questioning about Logan’s past.
“I have more questions for you.”
“I assumed you would.” He smiled indulgently.
“When you said before that Leah’s baby wouldn’t be the first grandchild, what did you mean?”
He tensed. “I’m not sure I’m ready to talk about this yet.”
“Please, Logan. I just want to know you, who you really are. Trust me with this,” I pleaded.
“I had a child once, a long time ago.” His voice was almost a whisper.
“What happened?” I reached across to hold his hand.
“The doctors called it SIDS.” His voice faltered. “I woke up one morning and went in to check on him and he was gone.” The pain in his voice slashed at me like a knife. I shouldn’t have asked this, it was too personal.
“Oh my god. I’m so sorry.” I wanted to hold him in my arms.
“It was a long time ago,” he said by way of dismissing me.
“It doesn’t matter how long ago it was. He was still your son.”
“His name was Jackson.”
“How old were you when he was born?” I squeezed his hand.
“I had just turned nineteen, it was right before I took over for my father.”
“What about the mother? Where was she?”
“Not in the picture. She didn’t want to be a mother. I wasn't at all ready to be a father, but he was mine and I loved him more than anything on this earth.” The emotion on his face was hard not to see. It was such a raw pain. How did you ever get over the death of a child?
“How old was he when he died?” I asked softly.
“He was almost one. He had just started talking.” He choked out the words.
In that moment, I forgot that we were in public, that there were people all around us. I walked around the table and took him in my arms. I could feel tears welling up in my eyes, there was no way I could imagine the kind of pain he had felt.
“I’m so sorry, Logan. And I’m sorry for making you tell me. You weren’t ready, and I shouldn’t have pushed.” I took his face in my hands and kissed him.
“It’s okay. I would have told you eventually.” His voice was rough, thickened with emotion. He coughed to clear his throat. I could tell he was done talking about it. I wanted to ask more about how he had met Jackson’s mother and who she was to him, but I didn't dare ask anymore of him. He had already ripped open one scar for me, I couldn’t ask him to dig into the wound.
Our food came out a few minutes later, and we lapsed into talk about me and my sisters.
“Tell me more about your sisters. I want to be prepared when I meet the rest.”
“You’ll like Hope a lot. She’s so grounded and solid. She really is the rock of our family. And my nephew Greyson, he’s amazing. He’s not even one, and he has us all wrapped around his little finger,” I blurted without thinking. “Oh god, I’m sorry. That was really insensitive of me.”
“Kitten, it’s okay for you to love your nephew and be excited about me meeting him. What happened to Jackson was awful, but it was a long time ago, and I can be around other kids. I’m not going to break down and cry if that’s what you think.”
“I don’t think that, but we had just talked about it and then I blurted that out.” I shook my head.
“I’m fine, I promise. Keep telling me about Hope.” He motioned for me to continue.
“She and I are the most alike. I would spend all my time at her house, but she has her own life and family.” I smiled, remembering nights laughing and watching movies. “You already know Faith. And before you ask, yes, she’s always that way.”
He laughed. “I find her refreshingly funny. It’s nice to meet people who say just what they mean.”
“That’s Faith to a tee.”
“What about Charity, what’s she like?” he asked between bites of his sandwich.
“So damn smart. She blows me away. None of us were surprised when she was accepted to Oxford. She’s the more serious of all of us. She doesn’t talk a lot, her nose is always in a book. God, I miss her already, and I just saw her a month ago,” I said wistfully.
“We’ll go for a visit soon, I promise.”
“You’re amazing, you know that right?” I beamed at him. The thought of seeing Charity again made me feel all giddy inside.
“I do what I can.” He laughed. “Tell me about your parents? How long have they been married?”
I smiled just thinking about them. “They are so in love that it’s almost sickening to see them. After almost forty years of marriage, they still seem like newlyweds. They run the family restaurant together and have for the past twenty years. It was a huge gamble when Dad decided to open it, but Mom stood behind him. I’ve always wanted that kind of love.” I said pressing a hand to my heart.
“Haven’t we all?” An odd expression crossed his face. “They sound like amazing people. You’re lucky you had them growing up.”
I nodded, knowing he was thinking about his own screwed-up childhood. “Sometimes the family we’re born with isn’t the family we need. Sometimes we get to choose the people we want as our family. You’ve done that with Smith.” I wanted to say he’d also done it with me, but I bit my tongue. I couldn’t voice that yet, it was too soon. It was too scary to for me to be that vulnerable.
“True. Smith is one of a kind. The best family I could ask for.” The smile returned to his eyes.
After lunch, we decided to go back to his apartment rather than going to the office again. Neither one of us was in much of a mood to pack anymore. I could tell just what he had in mind the whole drive back, he could barely keep his hands off me.
“God, you’re beautiful, Kitten.” Logan kissed me as we rode up in the elevator.
“I bet you say that to all the girls.” I giggled.
“Not lately.” He grinned and pressed me flat against the wall. “I think the rest of the packing can wait until tomorrow, what do you think? We did enough today at the office, I don't really want to be doing more of it here. Especially when there are better things we could be doing.” His eyes had gone dark and my knees suddenly wouldn’t hold me up anymore.
“I think we could do that. Did you have something else in mind for the rest of the evening?” I wiggled out from under him and walked out of the open elevator.
“I do, in fact, have something else in mind, and it involves a lot less clothing.” He caught up with me quickly.
“Hmm, less clothing you say?” I snatched his keys away and made for his door in a hurry. He was on me in an instant, his body pressing me against the door. I could feel his heat through my thin shirt.
We practically fell through the door, both of us laughing. I was in no way prepared for what was waiting inside.
She was standing by the huge window in the living room, and she wore nothing but a pair of black stilettos and a smile. She was gorgeous, of course. Long dark hair and startling blue eyes. Not to mention a body that looked like it was molded by the gods. I felt like I was going to throw up.
“Logan, darling, I’ve been waiting for ages,” she purred
“Fiona. Get dressed and get out of here.” Rage was rolling off of him in waves.
“Now, Logan, is that any way to speak to your fiancée?”
Fiancée? Logan had a fiancée?
“Grace, can you give us a moment?” Logan looked nervous.
“You know what? I really can’t. This is bullshit. You’ve had a fiancée this whole fucking time and you never said a word?” I was seeing red.
“Ask him about Annabelle.” Fiona smiled viciously.
“Grace..” He took a step toward me.
“No, just don’t.” I started toward the door.
“Good, let her go. Why don’t you come over here and greet me properly,” Fiona purred.
“Wait, Grace. Please. We need to talk about this,” he pleaded.
I didn’t stop, there was nothing I wanted to hear him say. He had lied to me, that was all I could think about. I couldn’t believe I had bought into his lie and believed that he really wanted a future with me. As the elevator doors closed, the tears began to fall down my cheeks.
EVERYTHING HAD GONE TO SHIT. In a split second, the happiness I had been feeling for days was blown apart. Grace was gone, and my stomach was in knots. She left. The sight of my naked ex fiancée had pushed her over the edge.
What the hell? “Fiona, get dressed.” I was beyond mad. Grace had just fled the apartment. All of my fury was targeted at the naked woman in my living room.
“I can’t be without you.” She walked toward me. Even in that moment, I couldn’t believe her. She was never genuine.
“No.” I held up my hand. “Get dressed now and get out of here.”
“No, not until we’ve talked this over.”
“What the fuck was this, Fiona? I haven’t laid eyes on you in six months at least. Why now?” I roared.
“I missed you.” She stopped dressing, her pale blue eyes taking on a feline look.
“Get out. Now,” I spat out and ran out my door to find Grace.
Where would she go? Faith was gone already, and she didn’t have a hotel to stay at or any of her things.
The sky had opened up at some point between when
we got home and now. Rain poured down on me as I raced down the street.
I saw her at the end of the block; she was walking aimlessly, soaked to the bone. “Grace!” I yelled.
“No, Logan.” She wouldn’t meet my eyes, her tears mixed with the rain on her cheeks.
It cut me up, seeing the expression on her face. Fuck Fiona for showing up in my apartment now.
“Please, just let me explain,” I pleaded, running to catch up with her. I raised my voice over the noise of the rain hitting the pavement.
“What can you say, Logan? What can you say that will make this better for me?” She whirled around to face me. The sudden anger made me take a step back. I wasn’t expecting it.
“I hate that I’m the other woman. I’ve never been a home wrecker. Was this all a joke for you?” She wiped at the makeup running down her face.
“I’m sorry. There’s no excuse for her. I’m not with Fiona, she is for sure not my fiancée.” I took Grace’s hand, needing to feel the connection. “Come back with me. We need to talk about all of this. There are things you need to understand.”
“What is it that I need to understand? That you used me? What was I to you? Some fun? A ploy to make her jealous?” Sadness painted her features as she paced in front of me on the sidewalk.
“No, you have it all wrong.” I knew I was pleading, but I didn’t care. I needed her to understand.
“I don’t believe you.” She sobbed, hugging her arms across her chest.
“Kitten. I’ve never lied to you. When I say she’s not my fiancée, I mean it.” I grabbed her hand so she would stop and look at me.
“Is she gone?” She was angry, not wanting to trust me.
“Yes. I made it clear that she was not welcome. Please, say you’ll come. I’ll call you a cab myself if you still want to leave after we talk.” I knew I was begging, but I didn't care.
“Fine.” She stalked off in the direction of my building.
I wanted to hold her hand, but I knew she wouldn’t accept that. I walked a pace or two behind her.
Grace stopped in front of my door. “You go in first. I don't think I could stomach seeing her tits again.” She leaned against the wall and waited for me to go in and make sure Fiona was gone.
“She’s gone.”
Never Let Me Go: The Complete Set Page 9