Patchwork Dreams

by Laura Hilton

  Her future husband, if what Annie had told her was true.

  Another tremor shook her, and she decided to stay as far away from him as she possibly could. She headed in Jacob’s direction.

  “How can I help?” She kept her voice hushed, hoping it wouldn’t carry.

  Jacob nodded toward the handle. “Could you turn that a bit? I don’t think I’ve got the fire hot enough.”

  ***

  Jacob didn’t like Daniel’s asking Becky to work in the blacksmith shop. It just didn’t seem right for her to be out here. He especially didn’t like how that older man standing next to Daniel had locked his eyes on her as soon as she’d walked across the room, looking at her with what Jacob could only call lust. He felt the same protective anger well up inside him that he’d felt when Kent had approached her at McDonald’s.

  He wanted to tell Becky to go back to the house.

  But it wasn’t his place.

  Becky took hold of the handle on the forge and slowly turned it. If Daniel had mentioned what it was called, Jacob couldn’t remember. But that didn’t matter. What did matter was making the hook that Daniel had told him to make in accordance with the detailed instructions he’d provided.

  Instructions that Jacob prayed he’d remember, despite Becky standing so close to him.

  Ach! And Daniel had told him to be careful so he wouldn’t get burned. Why had he asked Becky to come out here? If he had any inkling of Jacob’s growing attraction to his daughter, he certainly wouldn’t have asked her to work out here.

  He pulled the piece of metal out of the fire and looked at it for a moment, catching the orange-red hue that Daniel had stressed. “Gut, Bex. Danki.” He reached for a hammer and laid the metal on the anvil, stopping for a second to cough. Would he ever get used to the thick, cloying smoke?

  Becky stood there and watched him pound that piece of metal. Surprisingly, it turned out to be very good. At least he hadn’t embarrassed himself in front of her.

  “Hello, Rebekah.”

  The man who had been at the other end of the shop now stood beside Becky, his eyes fixed on her.

  Becky shot Jacob a frantic glance that he couldn’t quite interpret before she looked at the man. “Hello. How are you?”

  “Gut. Gut. Can’t complain.” He gestured behind him. “My buggy horse is lame. I think he has a loose shoe.”

  And he’d brought the lame horse to Daniel? Jacob frowned, confused. Daniel had said he did very little horse work. His brother David worked as a farrier.

  Becky looked in the direction of the horse, nodded, then looked back at Jacob.

  Jacob glanced at the now cooled piece of metal. He didn’t know quite how to handle this. Should he continue working, as if this man weren’t here ogling Becky?

  That would be unkind.

  Of course, to just stand there listening to a conversation that clearly didn’t include him would be wrong, too.

  With a shrug, Jacob set down the hammer, put the metal aside, and walked over to join Daniel, trying to ignore the look of betrayal Becky gave him as he turned away. He wished he could reassure her that he’d be right across the room keeping an eye on things. He needed to find out who this stranger was and what business he had with Becky. And the only one who would know, besides the man himself, would be her daed.

  With a frown, Daniel poked at something on the bottom of the horse’s foot. “Seems to be a stone under here. No wonder this horse is lame.”

  “Who is he?” Jacob whispered, hoping Daniel had heard him but the stranger across the room hadn’t. “I don’t like how he looks at Bex.”

  Daniel’s lips tightened, then he spoke. “Amos Kropf. He’s approached the bishop about marrying our Becky.” He dislodged a pebble from the horse’s hoof and tossed it aside.

  “You can’t be serious.”

  “He came the other day and asked my permission to court her.”

  Jacob’s eyes widened, and he stared over at the man, who’d stepped even closer to Becky. “You said nein, ain’t so?”

  “Becky is old enough to make her own decision.” Daniel’s voice indicated nothing.

  Jacob shifted. Frowned. Glanced again at Becky and this Amos Kropf, then looked away, horribly aware that this would be yet another thing he couldn’t control.

  Whom Becky allowed to court her would be none of his business. But he still didn’t like the way Amos Kropf looked at her. Inappropriate, especially for a man who appeared old enough to have a daughter her age.

  “You could stop it.”

  The voice was so low, Jacob didn’t know if he’d imagined the words or if Daniel had actually spoken them.

  Not wanting to appear befuddled in case he had imagined them, Jacob didn’t acknowledge them.

  Daniel straightened and walked away from Jacob, back toward Becky and that man. “Looks like your horse is gut to go, Amos. A rock had gotten lodged in there.”

  “Danki for your help, Daniel.”

  “Anytime.” Daniel pulled his watch out of his pocket and glanced at it, then wordlessly slid it back inside.

  As if somehow summoned by the action, a car pulled into the parking lot and stopped next to the buggy.

  “I’d better be going. I’ll see you later, Rebekah.” Amos shuffled his feet as he turned away.

  Becky dipped her head.

  ***

  Amos Kropf finally led his horse out of the shed as the new customer came in. Becky was glad for the interruption that had prompted him to move out of her personal space. She hadn’t wanted to be rude by backing away as he’d kept getting closer and closer, and it had taken great effort to restrain herself.

  “Becky, could you refill our coffee cups?” Daed asked as he strode toward the door to greet the new customer. “And tell your mamm that Amos Kropf and his kinner will be joining our family for dinner. I expect she’ll want you up at the haus to help prepare an apple pie or two.”

  “Daed?” Becky choked on the words. She swallowed. “His whole family, too?”

  “Jah.”

  Jacob gave her a sympathetic look but then turned away, going over to the forge and cranking it to make it hotter.

  She was on her own. The last thing she wanted to do was make her special apple pie for Amos Kropf. Her recipe had won a blue ribbon at the county fair last fall, and even though pride was a sin, Becky still felt some.

  She’d made her pie for Jacob the day he’d arrived. And he hadn’t even tasted it.

  It’d be a sin to purposefully ruin the pies to mislead Amos Kropf and make him think that she couldn’t cook.

  Especially since she wanted Jacob to believe she could.

  Jacob bumped his shoulder into hers and handed her his coffee cup. “He’s gone. You can go now.”

  Becky nodded, grateful that Jacob suspected she’d lingered because she didn’t want to talk to Amos Kropf while he hitched up his horse. That was the absolute truth.

  “Maybe you’d want to make your escape to McDonald’s for that fancy coffee again tonight, ain’t so? Or maybe you could suddenly remember a dinner appointment with a friend?” Jacob hesitated for a couple of seconds. “I could take you to one of the restaurants in town.”

  Ach, if only he would. Dinner out with Jacob would be wonderful. Gazing into each other’s eyes across the table…talking, laughing, falling in love…or maybe it would only feed her crush. Not a good idea.

  “I wish I could, but nein. Danki.” Becky walked away, collecting Daniel’s empty cup as she passed. “I’d best go clean up and get to work.”

  “Maybe some other time, then.”

  Becky glanced over her shoulder at him. “Maybe so.” Probably not.

  Her stomach churned the whole way to the house. Mamm looked up in surprise when she came in. “Done so soon? What’d he need you for?”

  Becky shrugged. “I don’t know. All I did was crank a bit, then he sent me up to tell you that Amos Kropf and his kinner are joining us for supper. And to help you make a couple of apple pies.”
/>
  Mamm frowned. “But it’s Mary’s birthday.” Heaving a sigh, she picked up a wooden spoon and stirred whatever she had cooking in the pot on the stove. “Go on and clean up. Then you can feed Emma and kum help. I’ll get the pies started.”

  “First they want a refill of coffee.”

  “They need one of those Englisch coffeepots down there.” Mamm turned away and reached up into the spice cabinet for something. “Maybe you could suggest plugging one into the generator. Hurry back.”

  Becky filled the cups, her heart heavy. Would she have the right to tell Amos Kropf nein, or would she be forced into a marriage with him? No one had mentioned whether the bishop supported it or not, but since Amos Kropf had approached Daed, she could only assume he did. And that Daed had agreed, hence the supper invitation.

  How many kinner did he have, anyway?

  Chapter 14

  Jacob’s morning passed with increasing activity in the blacksmith shop. Daniel gave him jobs that kept him busy, but he now wished for Becky’s help. They could have used a third person. No matter how long a job would take, many of the customers hung around the shop to talk while they waited for Daniel and Jacob to finish. And sometimes they stayed even after they’d paid for the completed work.

  The dinner bell rang, but with customers still in the shop, Jacob lingered to help Daniel finish up.

  He knew at least one thing: if he could talk Becky into joining him for an outing, then her parents would watch Emma. They seemed to have no hesitation stepping in when Becky was needed elsewhere—or when she disappeared, as she had yesterday.

  Becky needed to be in front of the other men of the community—and she needed to smile and laugh—if she was to have any hope of marrying better than Amos Kropf.

  He’d start asking every day. Eventually, she had to give in.

  And he’d make sure that all the men saw how wonderful, fascinating, and domestically skilled she was. He didn’t know how they could miss it.

  He’d treat her with utmost respect so that no one would see her as loose.

  “This is going to take a bit longer than I thought,” Daniel said to the elderly man who had a bushy beard that reached almost to his waist. “Would you like to join us for lunch, Bishop?”

  Jacob straightened, his eyes narrowing. This man might be the bishop forcing Becky to marry Amos Kropf.

  The man shook his head. “Nein. I’m sure my frau is wondering where I am. I’ll kum back this afternoon.”

  “We’ll get you fixed up.” Daniel turned to Jacob. “You run up to the haus and tell Leah I’ll be there shortly.”

  The day had warmed, dispensing the morning chill. Jacob grabbed his coat and carried it up to the dawdi-haus. He’d take a moment to put it away before going into the main house.

  Maybe he’d take the time to wash up over there first, too. Get some of the grubbiness off before he saw Becky. Even his face felt caked with soot from the morning’s work. A shower would be wonderful.

  “Jacob?” A voice intruded his thoughts.

  He turned to see Becky holding the dinner triangle. She must have been about to ring it again.

  “Where’s Daed?”

  Jacob grinned at her. “He’ll be up shortly.”

  “Gut.” She stood there, staring at him with a strange look in her eyes. Betrayal? Pain? Longing? Maybe a combination of the three. He wasn’t sure.

  Something in his heart hurt. He moved toward her and reached out to touch her cheek. “Bex?”

  A shutter closed over whatever the expression had been. “You have mail.”

  ***

  Becky had planned to tell him that she had changed her mind. That she’d take him up on the offer to take her out for dinner and deal with the flack for shunning Amos Kropf later.

  But the daily mail delivery had put a stop to that fantasy—more specifically, the plain white envelope addressed in flowery script to Jacob Miller and bearing the name of Susie Chupp in the upper left-hand corner.

  Or maybe it was the stamp with hearts on it in the top right-hand corner.

  Or the “I miss you” written on the back flap of the envelope.

  Either way, it was a brutal reminder that he had a sweetheart back home.

  To her shame, she’d been tempted to throw the letter in the fire and pretend it had never arrived.

  Instead, she’d held it and stared, studying this Susie’s handwriting. What words had she written to him?

  Jacob now froze in front of her, a scant foot away, his eyes searching hers. His hand dropped to his side. She didn’t know what he’d been reaching for. “A letter? For me? Is it inside?”

  Ach, why couldn’t she have kept her mouth shut? The letter was in the front pocket of her apron. How was she to explain to him why she hadn’t put it with the rest of the mail? And, worse, that she’d left the letter from his mamm inside the house?

  His mamm wasn’t her competition. Susie, on the other hand, was.

  Her face burned. She pulled the letter from her apron pocket and handed it to him without a word.

  Jacob gave the envelope a dismissive glance before his eyes returned to hers. Searching.

  She took a deep breath. Released it.

  Jacob stepped back. “I’ll be right in for lunch. And Daniel should be there directly.”

  He went into the dawdi-haus, and she heard him whistle as he shut the door behind him.

  Becky stood there a moment, staring at the closed door. Her life seemed like a spiral of dirty water going down the drain. A deep whirlpool, going faster and faster, out of control. If only Jacob had been reaching out for her. To rescue her, maybe. If only she could cling to Jacob to save her from the madness of being courted by Amos Kropf, which apparently would begin tonight.

  What a frightening turn her life had taken.

  If only Jacob could have been the one to love her in spite of herself.

  Instead, he was a flirt, with absolutely no intentions of following through.

  Right now, he was probably bent over the letter, poring over every word penned by his Susie.

  Or maybe he was laughing over the gullible Missouri girl falling for him.

  A tear crept out of the corner of her right eye. She brushed at it and turned away.

  A buggy moved down the drive toward the road. The bishop raised his hand but drove on by. He must have been the last customer, which meant that Daed would come out of the shop any moment.

  She didn’t need Daed to see her acting like a little lost puppy, waiting for Jacob to reappear.

  Becky brushed at her eyes again, squared her shoulders, and went inside.

  ***

  Jacob tossed Susie’s letter onto the bed, hung up his coat, and went to wash his hands. He’d save the letter to savor later in the day, when his chores were done. Something to look forward to.

  He figured the letter explained the look of betrayal in Becky’s eyes, but not why she would feel abandoned. She knew about Susie. He’d been straightforward about their relationship from day one.

  If anything, Becky was the “other woman.” He really should ask Susie for a break so that he could think. Ever since that run to McDonald’s to fetch Becky, something had changed. Jah, he needed to think about his relationship with Susie. Though how much thinking he’d do, daily tempted by Becky, he didn’t know.

  He didn’t understand why it hurt him so much when she felt pain. Why the confusion about his feelings for her? It should have been cut-and-dried. Susie was his future.

  Maybe.

  Jacob rolled his shoulders and strode toward the door.

  Going into the shared kitchen in the main house, he found the family already gathered around the table, except for Daniel, who stood drying his hands with a towel. Jacob nodded toward him, then slid into his seat, his eyes searching Becky’s face.

  She raised her eyes to meet his, tears shimmering in their depths. Then, just as quickly, her glance lowered.

  He hoped that she’d seen his silent apology but feared she ha
dn’t.

  It shouldn’t have mattered so much, but it did.

  Jacob sighed. He knew that he should have been keeping his distance from Becky, but instead, he’d been seeking her out, trying to talk to her, reaching out to her.

  As curious as he was as to why, the prospect of finding the answer scared him.

  Chapter 15

  Becky needed contact with someone who loved her. She picked up Emma, even though the baby seemed completely content lying on her back in the cradle and kicking her feet at the string of bells Mamm had strung across the rails. Becky swaddled her in a sling that had been a boppli gift from her great-aunt Martha. A gift that Becky appreciated and used quite often. It was a handy way to carry Emma when she was fussy or if Becky needed to go somewhere. Right up next to the body. Whoever had thought of that was a genius.

  Once the baby-bearing sling was in place, Becky started the kitchen chores. Mamm had already rolled out crusts for the pies, and when she brought out some dried apples from their fall harvest, Becky realized she was making schnitz pie. Relief washed over her to know that she wouldn’t have to bake her special apple pies. She didn’t want to go to all that work for Amos Kropf. Not right after making them for Jacob…. Ach, she shouldn’t go there, but it still hurt that Jacob had refused a piece. Maybe he didn’t like it.

  There was something wrong with him if he didn’t. Everyone liked apple pie. Right?

  “I thought we’d have fried chicken tonight,” Mamm whispered with a glance around the kitchen. “It’s Mary’s favorite, and we do have plenty of hens.”

  Becky nodded, but she could never stomach killing a chicken and eating it the same day.

  That didn’t really matter, though, since she wouldn’t be able to eat a bite of anything with Amos Kropf at the table. The way he looked at her made her feel dirty. Cheap.

  It reminded her of how she’d felt after Kent’s lies had circulated. The way she still felt when she got around some of the young men.

  Ach, if only she could go out with Jacob tonight.

  But he’d hesitated for a few seconds too long when he’d asked, as if he might not have meant it. And then, there was that letter to consider. She should have thrown it in the fire. If only this Susie didn’t exist.