Safe Rider (A Lost Saxons Novel Book 2)

by Jessica Ames

  I pull the handset from my ear just as the call screen disappears. I don’t hesitate. I pull up the redial button and hit it. It rings and rings and rings. I hang up and repeat the action with the same result.

  Immediately, I push to my feet. I have no idea where I’m going or what I’m doing, but I need to do something…

  Axel grabs for my arm, stopping me.

  “Whoa, easy there, love. Let’s not do something rash.”

  “I’m going to get Dean back.”

  “Yeah, from where?”

  I open and then close my mouth because Simon hadn’t said a word about where they were holed up.

  “I don’t know. I’ll call him back and find out.”

  “No, you won’t. I texted Derek. He knows Dean’s missing, so’s Jack’s daughter. We get that photograph to the boys, see if they can pull something from it that’ll help them find them both.”

  Jack’s daughter. That’s Beth. I’m sure Dean said Jack is Beth’s father.

  Shit. Yet another person I’ve dragged into my mess.

  “Oh my God. I need to tell Simon I’ll do what he wants.” I have no doubt he’ll kill them both if I don’t.

  Harper grabs my wrist. “No, you don’t. You’re pregnant, honey, and Dean brought you here because he thought this might happen. You need to stay safe.”

  “But Dean—”

  “Will be fine. The brothers’ll find him, have faith in that.”

  I do have faith in that, but I also know my ex-husband is a total maniac—who is absolutely hell bent on revenge.

  Chapter Thirty-Four

  The next few hours are excruciating. The wait nearly kills me. Is Dean okay? Have the brothers found him? I try to call Dean’s phone again but it just keeps going to voicemail, meaning the phone’s dead or Simon has turned it off. Neither scenario makes me feel good. Axel eventually takes the handset off me.

  Harper sits next to me on the sofa, our hands clutched together while Axel spends most of his time out of the room on the phone. I have no idea what is happening, and I hate that I don’t. I dread to think what Simon will do to him and to Beth in the name of revenge—and this whole thing is, without a doubt, about revenge.

  Simon is furious.

  He was also making no sense. Usually, he’s manipulative, but he’s clever about it; he was brazen on the phone.

  Axel steps into the room and my head snaps to him.

  “The boys found them both. They’re alive and on the way to the hospital.”

  “Oh, thank God.” All the tension leaches from my body and I sag into the chair. Then I push to my feet. “I’ll go pack.”

  “Pack? Darlin’, we’re not leaving here.”

  I stare at him. “But Dean—”

  “You’re staying here until I get the green light from the Saxons that you can return. Shit still isn’t safe.”

  “I’m not staying.”

  “Well, you’d better start walking now, because you’re not driving out of here, and it’s a good hundred miles to Kingsley.”

  I deflate, my stomach sinking.

  His mouth pulls into a line. “I’m sorry, Liv, but this decision comes direct from Derek. I’m not crossing another Club president—not on this.”

  I open my mouth to argue but Harper takes my hand, squeezing. “I know you want to be with him, but if you can’t there’s a reason. Just let them boys do what they do best: keep you safe.”

  I fall asleep on the sofa. I don’t even make it to bed. I was too exhausted to move after the events of the day so I just laid down and closed my eyes. Harper must have covered me in the night because I wake with the sunlight streaming through the window, wrapped in a colourful crocheted blanket. Pushing up off the sofa, I head to the bathroom, clean my teeth and wash my face. I barely finish my ablutions before I’m smacked with a wave of nausea that has my head hanging over the toilet. I have nothing in my stomach yet so bring up nothing but water and bile. It burns the back of my throat and leaves me a shaking mess. I’m just resting between heaves when I hear Harper calling my name from deep within the bowels of the house.

  “Bathroom,” I manage to yell out.

  The morning sickness hasn’t been too bad, so I can’t complain, but hanging over the toilet isn’t exactly fun. I keep telling myself it’ll be worth it in the end when I’m holding our baby, but I wish there was a way of getting there without feeling so rotten.

  I also wish Dean was with me.

  I feel alone, despite having Axel and Harper here.

  “Shit, woman,” Harper says as she puts her head around the door. “Are you keeping anything down?”

  I shake my head, keeping it over the bowl. Even that small movement makes my vision roll and my stomach churn. I’m well into the healing process after Simon’s beating, but heaving still puts pressure on the areas he inflicted the most damage, which only adds to my misery. “I feel terrible. Has Axel heard anything from Derek?” I ask.

  Harper moves to the sink and runs the tap.

  “No, honey. Not a word.”

  My heart sinks. “I need to see him. I hate being in the dark.”

  “Well, whatever’s going on I’m sure you’ll find out eventually. But I wouldn’t worry; Dean’s a big boy, honey. He can take care of himself. For now, let’s just focus on you and that baby.” She places a freshly wrung out washcloth on the back of my neck. It’s cool and it feels divine.

  “Oh…” I moan as I tip my head forward. “Thank you.”

  “I’ve got to admit: seeing you like this is making me happy as hell me and Ax don’t want kids.”

  “Well, this one wasn’t exactly planned either,” I tell her, “but I’m happy about it. And I think Dean is too. I’m just… I’m worried.”

  I like Harper; I’m going to miss her when I go home—if I ever go home. Her and Axel are good together as well, but seeing them being lovey-dovey just makes me miss Dean more.

  “How do you do it?” I ask.

  “Do what?”

  “Deal with the secrets, the half-lies?”

  She considers me for a moment. “In the beginning I didn’t deal. It pissed me off that he had all these secrets and things he was keeping from me. In fact, we had a blazing row about it one day and I threatened to leave.”

  This surprises me enough to lift my head away from the toilet bowl. Her and Axel seem so in love.

  He reminds me of Dean, with the little touches as he passes her, the little gestures he does to show her he cares.

  “You did?”

  She nods. “Yeah. I was pissed off, girly. I love Ax, but I wasn’t prepared to be in a relationship with a man who couldn’t be honest with me. But Ax being Ax wasn’t prepared to let me go without a fight. Club life is hard—I told you this the other day. You have to be prepared to give up certain things.”

  “Like having trust in your relationship?”

  Harper snorts as she leans a hip against the sink. “I trust Axel. I trust him more than I trust myself. At least I do now.”

  “Even though he omits things?”

  “Even though he omits things.” She chews on her bottom lip a moment. “Club life is our life, but it’s not my business—if that makes sense. Ax does what he does and I don’t get involved. It’s safer that way, it keeps me protected from any fallout. These men aren’t angels. Let’s be real here: we know they’re doing shit they shouldn’t be doing day in, day out. By keeping that side of their business from us, they protect us. They also protect themselves. Loose lips sink ships. The same goes for old ladies and Club girls. A disgruntled wife or girlfriend who has had her man spilling all the Club’s secrets can run her mouth to the Old Bill. Then, everyone’s looking at time inside. Keeping stuff between the brothers only stops that happening, so Dean’s never going to tell you about the inner workings of the Club. If you’re expecting that then you need to walk away now because it’s not going to happen. Axel tells me what I need to know and nothing more. And I trust that what he tells me is all I need to kno
w. You’ve got to love the Club as much as you love the man, and not everyone can do that. If you can’t then walk away because it’s not going to change. Dean’s never going to change.”

  There is a lot to digest in her words, a lot that I’m not sure how to digest, but I focus on the one thing that is loud and clear in my mind.

  “I do love Dean.”

  “Enough to let this side of things slide?”

  I don’t have to think about my answer. “Yes. I’d rather have him than not have him. And I’ll take him however he comes.” And I don’t care how desperate or pathetic that makes me sound. Dean is home, he’s love, he’s security. Somehow, I’ll just have to deal with the Club side of things.

  “Then you’ll be fine, Livs.”

  “The trust thing…”

  “It takes time to build, but I know Dean. He’s a good man—one of the best. But this world is his world and if you want to be with him you have to do it in his world.”

  I sigh. “I think I can get up now.”

  I flush the toilet and push up from the cold tiles. Harper steadies me as the move to upright has my legs wobbling under me.

  “I’m not going to lie to you: this life isn’t easy. I meant it when I said that, but the pros far outweigh the cons. Axel… he’s everything to me and I’m everything to him. I know him, and his brothers in our Club, would die for me. They don’t make men like these in the real world.”

  I know this first-hand, given the fact I lived with a man in a suit who was handy with his fists. Dean would cut off his hand before he ever raised it to me—or another woman.

  Chapter Thirty-Five

  It’s hours later before I hear from Dean. We’re sitting around the dining table, eating, when my phone rings. The number is unknown. I answer it, cautiously, Axel and Harper watching on.

  “Hello?”

  “Hey, darlin’.” My entire body relaxes at the familiar voice and I feel tears stinging my eyes.

  “Dean.” I glance up at Axel and Harper. “It’s Dean.”

  Axel gives me a nod and holds a hand out to Harper. She takes it and he pulls her up out of the chair. I barely notice them leaving the kitchen, all my attention focused on the voice down the line.

  “Are you all right? I’ve been so worried.”

  “Yeah, Liv. I’m all right.” He sounds tired, bone-weary tired, in fact. All my senses go on alert.

  “You don’t sound it.”

  “I’m fine.”

  He’s not. He’s lying. He sounds strange, slurred even.

  “You sound funny.” There’s a moment of silence and then he groans a little. “Dean?”

  “I’m in the hospital, but I’m okay. Please don’t worry.”

  “How am I supposed to not worry when you’re telling me you’re in the hospital?”

  “Because I’m telling you not to.”

  Like it’s that simple, but he sounds exhausted and I don’t want to tire him more. “Why can’t I come home? What happened with Simon?”

  “I’ll tell you everything when I see you next, I promise.”

  “When will that be?”

  “Soon.”

  Soon isn’t an answer, and I have to grit my teeth to keep my temper in check. “Is ‘soon’ a week, two, ten?”

  “As soon as I’m sure it’s safe. Darlin’, I know it’s hard, but just a little longer and we can be together again.”

  “What’s the hold up? I’m going crazy over here.”

  “I know, and I’m sorry, but I’m doing everything I can to fix this.” And that I believe because he sounds exhausted. An uncomfortable feeling settles in the pit of my stomach. He’s only in this situation because of me and my past, and I’m giving him shit about it.

  “I know you are. I just miss you.”

  “I miss you too, baby. I’m sorry to cut this short, but I’ve got to run; I’ll call you tomorrow, okay? I love you.”

  “I love you more.”

  As we wait for the all clear, me, Axel and Harper get into a steady routine. Axel spends all day locked down in one of the spare rooms, seeing to ‘Club business’, or so Harper tells me. This leaves me and her to entertain ourselves. I read pretty much everything I can off the shelf in the living room while Harper works remotely on her laptop. She runs a small design business, so she spends most of the day making logos and other graphics for clients, wowing me with her amazing skills. I also nap a lot. I’m exhausted. God knows what I’m going to be like in the next few months as I start growing.

  I’m napping on the sofa while Harper works at the small table when I hear a commotion. It pulls me out of my sleep and as I open my eyes I see Harper has rushed up from her workstation and is in the window, kneeling on the window seat to peer out into the soupy evening. It’s been foggy all day, but even from here I can see the hazy lights pushing through the low cloud—heading towards the house.

  My heart starts to race because no one knows we’re here—apart from Dean, Holly and Derek. And as far as I know no one is supposed to be coming up here.

  “What’s going on?” I ask, all vestiges of sleep pushed aside.

  “I don’t know. There’s a car coming. Axel!” she yells his name and I hear movement from upstairs. A couple of seconds later the door pushes open and Axel is crossing the room to the window.

  “I saw it.”

  “Are we expecting anyone?” Harper demands as he gently but firmly moves her out of the way of the window.

  He doesn’t answer but turns to us both. “Stay here. Don’t fucking leave this room until I come back.”

  I watch him go, and I hope to hell I’ll watch him come back too. I hate that everyone is putting themselves in the line of fire for me.

  I bite the corner of my thumbnail as the lights come closer to the house and the engine sounds nearer. Then it cuts and silence follows before I hear raised voices.

  Harper moves to the sideboard and pulls open the top drawer. Her hand goes inside it and she comes out holding a gun. My eyes flare.

  “Should you be playing with that thing?”

  Her gaze comes to me. “I’m not playing. Come away from the door, but stay away from the window.”

  I move into the middle of the room, my arms wrapping around my stomach as my fear mounts. Is Axel okay? Who is outside? What’s going on?

  “Liv?” Axel’s voice breaks through the silence. “You want to come out here?” Mine and Harper’s eyes meet.

  “Should I go?” I ask Harper who shrugs.

  “Ax wouldn’t tell you to come out unless it was safe.” This is true; he wouldn’t. “I’ll come with you.”

  “Okay. Maybe uh… leave the gun here though.”

  She glances down at the weapon in her hand. “Yeah, that might be an idea.”

  She tucks it back into the drawer and we both open the living room door. Cautiously, we step into the kitchen and Harper pulls open the back door.

  It leads out into a courtyard with a small wall and gate. Beyond that is a parking area where Axel’s oversized four-by-four is parked up. Behind that is another vehicle, the headlights casting a warm glow. I recognise the man leaning out of the driver’s side door. It’s Jem Harlow—one of the Club’s members. What’s he doing here?

  My heart starts to pound so hard I can hear it in my ears as my gaze shifts to Axel standing at the front end of the car. Has something happened to Dean? Is that why he’s here. Then my heart stops altogether as a voice says, “Liv,” softly.

  My eyes shift to the other side of the car, the side furthest from the house. In the dusk light and hidden behind the headlights, I hadn’t noticed the other figure but now I’ve seen him I don’t know how I missed him.

  It’s Dean.

  I blink and then I’m moving before I even know what I’m doing. I push through the gate, nearly falling in my haste and round the front of the car. The lights blind me momentarily, and I have to blink to clear my sight. I’m nearly to him when I see his face.

  Holy shit.

 
I stop dead in my tracks. Dean’s jaw is a wash of bruising and cuts. He looks like he went ten rounds with a tanker, and lost. My hand goes to my mouth, mostly because I feel suddenly sick.

  “It looks worse than it is.”

  “It looks awful.”

  One hand scrubs over his beard which is wilder than usual and could do with a trim, but I notice the other arm is in a sling. Oh. My. God.

  “I’m fine, darlin’.”

  “You don’t look fine.” He looks beat to hell. “Simon did this.”

  Dean’s gaze goes to Jem and Axel. “You mind giving us a minute?”

  “No problem,” Jem says, grabbing Axel’s arm. “Me and this lummox have got some catching up to do. It’s good to see you again, Liv.”

  I don’t answer him; I can’t. I move closer to Dean, my fingers reaching out for his face which looks even worse the closer I get. His injuries aren’t fresh; even in this light I can tell the bruises are a yellowy-green, rather than purple or black and his cuts are scabbed over.

  “Are you going to kiss me or what?”

  I glance up at him, tears forming in my eyes. “I don’t know where to kiss you that isn’t hurt.”

  He tugs me towards him and his head descends. Gently, his lips brush over mine and I feel the cut on his lip against mine. I kiss him softly at first, then his hand goes to the back of my neck, tangling in my hair and I sag into his touch. Oh God, I’ve missed this. I’ve missed him. I cling to his uninjured arm like he’s life-saving driftwood keeping me afloat.

  When we part, I’m breathless—as is he. Our foreheads come together as we cling to each other.

  “I’ve missed you,” I tell him.

  “I’ve missed you more.”

  I half-sob, half-laugh. “I doubt that.”

  He kisses my hair, his hands running up my arms.

  Tear blaze in my eyes. “I’m sorry.”

  My chin is lifted and Dean’s gaze bores down on me. “Don’t be sorry for that piece of shit.”