A Birder's Guide to Murder

by J. R. Ripley

  Esther leaned against the bench and shut her eyes. Fifteen minutes later, she stood and we worked our way back to the main entrance, skirting Martin Ritter’s grave as we did.

  Derek arrived with the van. He had lots of questions but since I had none of the answers and whatever answers Esther had she was not willing to share with either him or me, not much was said.

  Back at the booth, Floyd took a step in Esther’s direction to hug her but stopped midway. Her look said hands off. Floyd thrust his hands in his pockets.

  “Glad you ladies made it back,” said Karl. “You missed all the excitement.”

  Esther scooped up her purse from under the table.

  “So I heard. Derek was telling us all about it. So Lorna Fuller murdered her husband?”

  “I’m not so sure. The police took her in. Then they released her.” Karl’s eyes shot around the Expo Center. “The killer could still be among us.”

  Was it my imagination or did his gaze stop on Esther for a tiny moment too long?

  “Let’s call it a day. The expo starts bright and early tomorrow,” I suggested. “What do you say?”

  “Suits me.” Derek handed me my jacket.

  A beefy gentleman in a brown suit, yellow shirt and blue necktie approached our booth. With him was a young man with a limp dressed like a zombie.

  They made an odd couple.

  Esther turned her back.

  “That’s her,” pointed the zombie. “That’s the lady I saw.”

  “Ma’am?” said the brown suit.

  “Me?” I said.

  “No. The other one, in the flowery dress.” The gentleman pointed his finger at Esther. A heavy gold watch dangled from his wrist. “Ma’am?”

  Esther turned. “Yes?”

  The zombie turned eager eyes on his human escort. “She was in the hall, detective. Ask her. Go ahead, ask her.”

  “Detective?” Derek shot me a look of concern.

  The detective looked at the young man with unmasked disdain. Maybe he didn’t like the young fellow telling him his job. Maybe he simply did not like zombies.

  I wasn’t a big fan myself.

  “Ma’am. I need to ask you a couple of questions.”

  Derek and the guys were flummoxed. I was less so.

  “Shoot.” Esther folded her arms across her chest.

  “First, let me introduce myself, Detective Simon Locke.” The detective had thin blond hair with a trace of blond fuzz under his lower lip. He pulled out his ID and presented it to us.

  “If you say so.” Esther was playing it cool.

  “Can you tell me your name, please?”

  “Esther Pilaster.” She pulled her badge from her purse and flashed it at the detective.

  We had removed our lanyards in the taxi.

  “Thank you, Ms. Pilaster. I’m afraid there’s been an unfortunate incident. A murder.”

  “You don’t say?”

  “Yes.” Detective Locke cleared his throat. “A JJ Fuller. Did you know the deceased?”

  “We only arrived in Philadelphia last night. We’re from North Carolina.”

  I interrupted. Lots of people had seen Fuller at our booth. It was only a matter of time until someone Locke interviewed pointed this out. “Mr. Fuller stopped by our booth this morning while we were setting up, don’t you remember, Esther? He wanted to introduce himself.”

  “I remember now.” She smiled apologetically. “I’m afraid the memory isn’t what it used to be, young man.”

  “Of course.” The detective stuck a finger under his collar and tugged. “This man here,” Detective Locke said, indicating the zombie, “Mr. Peter Porter, reported seeing you, Ms. Pilaster, roaming the halls in the vicinity of the murder.”

  Esther said nothing.

  Detective Locke continued. “Is that true?”

  “I don’t know,” Esther said, sounding suddenly feeble. “I was wandering around. This is a big place, isn’t it? I was looking for the ladies’ powder room.” She stared at the zombie. “Where did this horrible murder take place?”

  “A small dressing room that doubles as a storage room,” explained Locke.

  “If you like, I can retrace my steps maybe,” Esther offered. “It is time for my heart medication though. Could you give me a minute? Amy, be a dear and fetch me my pills, would you?”

  Good grief. She was really playing up the little old lady routine.

  Detective Locke slipped his notepad into his shirt pocket. “I don’t think that it will be necessary to trouble you right now.” He read our banner. “I suppose you’ll be here all weekend?”

  “Yes,” I said. “Ms. Pilaster is with Birds and Bees. Like me. We’re exhibitors.”

  “A murder at a birding expo seems highly improbable,” Derek noted. “Do you have any idea, detective, what the motive might have been?”

  “I really couldn’t say. We’re still looking into that, sir. It’s early days.” He helped himself to a handful of tiny wrapped chocolate kisses from the bowl Derek had set out earlier.

  “Robbery?” I suggested. “I mean, what else could it be?”

  “It may have been robbery.” Detective Locke allowed. “There was approximately two hundred in cash in Mr. Fuller’s wallet but a very expensive camera is missing. Worth thousands, according to his wife, that is.”

  I wanted to ask why the thief hadn’t taken the binoculars I had seen near JJ Fuller’s body. Those were worth a couple grand too. But how could I ask without tipping my hand that I had seen them?

  Detective Locke departed, taking his zombie with him, after telling us that if he had any further questions, he’d stop by.

  “Do you want me to see if I can pry any more information out of him, Amy?” Karl asked. He looked itching to go after the cop. As an ex-lawman, he was always at the ready.

  “No, that won’t be necessary.” I buttoned my coat. “We’re here to promote Birds and Bees, not investigate crimes.”

  “That’s right.” Derek trained his eyes on me.

  “And to have fun,” Floyd put in.

  Esther took Floyd’s arm and a smile took over his face. “What do you say we hit the casino? I could use a little excitement.”

  “Sure thing, Esther.” Floyd grew about twelve inches before my eyes. “You coming, Karl?”

  Karl dipped his hand into his pocket. “Got my cash money right here.”

  6

  With the others gambling, Derek and I had had the evening to ourselves, settling on an Italian restaurant in the historic district where we shared pasta primavera, a bottle of wine and the pleasure of each other’s company. After a late night, we had returned to the Eagle Inn on foot.

  That was when I discovered Esther hadn’t returned.

  Not that I had been worried. Esther was a grown woman. Karl and Floyd were keeping her company. And Karl was an ex-lawman. He might even be carrying a gun despite my admonishing him not to.

  I’d gone to bed, sleeping fitfully as the events of the past day replayed themselves over and over in my mind. Nothing made sense. The only thing that remained a certainty—unless the whole day had been a nightmare—was that JJ Fuller was dead.

  Throwing off the covers, I looked at Esther’s bed. There was no sign of her or that her bed had been slept in.

  Now I was beginning to worry.

  I decided to shower and investigate. I was reaching for the blow dryer when there was a knock on the door. “Esther, is that you?” I ran to the door barefoot, pushing a bath towel through my damp hair.

  “Hello, Floyd.” I looked over his shoulder, up and down the hall. No sign of Esther. “I thought you were Esther.”

  “Not even in one of her best Sunday dresses could I look like Esther,” Floyd joked. “Where is she? Getting ready in the bathroom?”

  I cleared my throat.
“She’s not here, Floyd.”

  “What do you mean Esther’s not here?” Floyd peered past me into the room. “Is she downstairs getting breakfast?”

  “No, I don’t think so.”

  “Where is she?”

  “Actually, I’m not sure where she is, Floyd.”

  “I don’t understand.” Floyd poked his nose in. “Esther? Are you here?”

  “I’m telling you. I haven’t seen her. She never came back to the inn. At least, not to our room,” I added as Floyd swept past me, took a look at Esther’s crisply made bed then poked his nose in the still steaming bathroom.

  Floyd fell onto the corner of Esther’s bed. He ran his hand over the duvet. “Her bed doesn’t look slept in.”

  “Uh…” I didn’t have a clue where Esther could be and I didn’t know how to explain her absence.

  Floyd looked sharp in a brown and black houndstooth sport coat, brown slacks, a white shirt and a tie. He smelled of lime cologne and was freshly shaven. “I don’t understand.”

  I draped my towel over the chair at the desk and sat next to him. “What happened last night, Floyd?”

  “What do you mean?”

  “You, Esther, and Karl went gambling at one of the casinos, right?”

  “We went to SugarLand Casino in the north part of town. Karl won ten thousand dollars.”

  I fell from the bed. “Ten thousand dollars? That’s great.”

  Floyd shrugged. “He lost it all again. Plus another three.”

  “Oh.” I sat back down and draped a friendly arm over Floyd’s back. “Tell me about Esther.”

  “How do you mean?”

  “When did you see her last?”

  Floyd eyed me curiously. “What kind of question is that? Didn’t she return at all last night? What aren’t you telling me, Amy?”

  “Calm down, Floyd,” I found myself saying, although I was feeling anything but calm myself. JJ Fuller ends up dead and Esther was the one pointing him out to me in an obscure out of the way bathroom, then she acts all bizarre and takes me to a cemetery where she proceeds to plant an osprey feather on a grave and tell me about her ex-lover.

  Next, she goes to a gambling casino and disappears.

  I stood and paced, my feet trying to keep up with my racing thoughts. I couldn’t possibly tell Floyd any of it.

  I pulled back the drapes and looked out at Philadelphia. People were walking, cars and buses were moving. Everything appeared so normal.

  So ordinary.

  So why was I living in the Twilight Zone?

  Floyd interrupted my thoughts. “Did Esther come back to the inn or not? Tell me, Amy.”

  “No,” I answered. “She didn’t. At least, not to our room. She wasn’t here when I went to bed. Once, in the middle of the night, I woke up and noticed she wasn’t in her bed. I just assumed…”

  “Assumed what?”

  “Well, that maybe she was, you know…”

  “Huh?”

  “With you.” I averted my eyes.

  “With me?” Floyd’s face blew up a bright red. “You think Esther and I—”

  Floyd stopped mid-sentence. We both knew where he was going.

  I nodded.

  “How could you think such a thing? Esther is a lady. I would never. Besides, I’m sharing a room with Derek and Karl.”

  “Philadelphia is full of hotel rooms.”

  “No, Amy. The last time I saw Esther was at the casino. She said she was tired and wanted to come back to the inn. I offered to accompany her but she insisted I stay and keep an eye on Karl. So that’s what I did.”

  “And she definitely said she was coming back to the Eagle Inn? You are sure?”

  “Sure, I’m sure. I saw her get in the cab myself.”

  I had a sudden thought. “Let’s call her.” I grabbed my cellphone from the night table and punched in Esther’s number. “It went straight to voicemail.”

  Floyd frowned. “Let’s telephone the police.”

  “No, no police.” Whatever Esther was up to and whatever had happened to her, I didn’t want to call the police. At least, not yet. Whatever was going on had to have something to do with JJ Fuller.

  And Esther appeared to be up to her pestering little eyeballs in it. I had to find out just what sort of trouble she was in before dragging the police into the matter.

  I had to hear Esther’s side of the story, as ominous as I feared it might be. It had been crazy enough already.

  Besides, I wasn’t sure if calling the local authorities would do much good. If Esther wanted to stay out all night, there was nothing to be done about it. “It is too early to report her missing.”

  “I suppose…”

  “Let’s get the guys and see what they think. Karl might have some ideas. Maybe he even has some local contacts. Don’t worry, Floyd. I’m sure Esther is perfectly fine.”

  * * * *

  It was a long, subdued trip to the American Birding Expo. I filled Derek and Karl in on Esther’s escapades and disappearance. Well, up to a point.

  There were some things that I wasn’t sure if I should mention just yet.

  Like our connection to JJ Fuller’s corpse.

  Floyd said little on the drive. Karl worked hard to try and cheer him up. It was the first full day of the Expo and the hall was filling quickly. Workshops and bird walks were on the schedule each morning. I was hoping to take part in some once things got back to normal and we settled into our routine.

  If it wasn’t for the murder and Esther being missing in action, I might have been happy.

  Floyd and Karl roamed the aisles searching for a sign of Esther. Derek was handing out sample bird bars.

  “Did you hear about the murder, Amy?” Robin leaned over the curtain divider.

  “Yes,” I said. “Terrible, isn’t it? I hope it doesn’t put a pall on the birding Expo.”

  “Me, too. We came all the way from South Carolina for this.”

  “First time?”

  “No, we’ve been doing the Expo since the inaugural a few years back. You?”

  “First time. I’m hoping to drum up some interest in my store. Mostly coming to the Expo would give me some ideas about how to expand my business.”

  “I get that. Have you been in business long?”

  “No, a year or so. I’ve been toying with the idea of developing an online storefront.”

  “You know what you should do?”

  “What’s that?”

  “Offer birding tours.”

  I furrowed my brow. “Me? Birding tours?”

  “Sure, like we do.”

  “No, I don’t think so.”

  “It’s a growing business. Ecotourism. Trust me.”

  “I believe you but I don’t know anything about running tours.”

  “Maybe not but I’m guessing you know about birds.”

  “Yes, but—”

  “And I’m guessing there are probably plenty of folks in your town—where were you from?”

  “Ruby Lake, North Carolina.”

  “In Ruby Lake, North Carolina, I bet there are folks who would love to go on a birding tour. It doesn’t have to be anything fancy or extended. You could start with a long weekend.”

  “Where would we go?”

  “I’m sure if you put your mind to it, you can come up with something that will appeal to your customer base.”

  “You know, I think you might be on to something.”

  “I think so, too.” Derek had been listening in. “In fact, I think it is a terrific idea.” He gave me a squeeze. “You can count me in.”

  “We’re talking birding, not golfing,” I teased.

  “Okay. I’ll leave the clubs at home and bring the binoculars.” He frowned. “Have you got a spare pair of binoculars I can b
orrow?”

  “Very funny.” I gave Derek a gentle shove. “I’ll give it some thought, Robin.” I was intrigued. Running the occasional tour could prove lucrative. Lucrative enough to make covering Birds & Bees ever-increasing payroll less challenging.

  “Good.” Robin smiled. “If you need any help or want to brainstorm, just ask me or one of the others. Except Harry, here,” she said, nodding at the young man who’d joined us. “His ideas have a way of going amuck.”

  “Ha-ha,” Harry said.

  “I’ll keep that in mind.”

  George Dolenz came from the food court. He dumped a bunch of wrapped sandwiches on their table. “Guess what.” Before anyone could, he said, “I heard that Skoglund volunteered to take over for Fuller and deliver the keynote address tonight.”

  “Interesting,” I said. “I heard the two of them hated one another.”

  “Where did you hear that?” George wanted to know.

  “From one of the other exhibitors.”

  “It’s true.” Robin grabbed a sandwich from the pile and peeled back the wrapper. She held it to her nose and took a whiff. “I’ve never known them to have a civil word to say to one another. Tonight ought to prove interesting.”

  And it did.

  7

  I felt a tap on the shoulder and turned. “Esther!”

  “Sorry, I’m late.” Esther set her purse under the table. Somewhere along the way, she had managed to change clothes. Yesterday’s dress had been replaced by a pair of comfy heather slacks and a black Birds & Bees sweatshirt. “What’s new?”

  Did she seriously just ask me what was new after being MIA since last night?

  “Where have you been?” I demanded.

  “I had to freshen up. Then we stopped for a bite.” Her hands were busy pointlessly rearranging a stack of store brochures.

  I bit my tongue and turned to Esther’s unknown companion. “I’m afraid we have not met, Mister…”

  “This is my friend, Marty,” explained Esther.

  “Martin Ritter,” said the gentleman with a tip of his head.

  “Marty?” I squeaked. “The one who—”