“I’m really sorry, Becca.” she whispered. “I know how much you love her.”
“This can’t be happening.” I said.
“We gonna sit here all night?” David asked. “It can’t be all that safe.”
“David, shut up.” Amber told him. “We’re going to sit here as long as it takes.”
There was a knock on the window. I glanced up. Bridget. She motioned for me to roll the window down. I wiped at my eyes and rolled it down.
“Dad wants to know what the plan is.”
“I don’t know anymore.”
“We can’t just sit here, Becca.”
“Don’t you think I know that?!” I shouted.
“We’re going on as planned.” Amber told her. “She just needs a little while. Go back to your car, Bridget.”
“I’m really sorry, sis.” Bridget said. “Natasha is like a sister to me. Did she really propose to you?”
“Now’s not the best time for this.” Amber told her.
“Right. Sorry, Becca.”
I knew I had to pull myself together. There’s too many people relying on me. I leaned back and wiped my eyes, then put the car in gear and pulled away. Life sucks.
Monday, May 16th
We stopped on the edge of town. There were bodies. A lot of bodies. Thousands. Many of
them are piled right in the center of the highway. It looks like a crowd came running out of town and someone with a lot of firepower just mowed wave after wave of them down.
So does that mean this isn’t a safe place? If there are this many dead here could that possibly mean that some military group swept through the city and cleared it? Are there still military people here?
“What’s the call?” Dad asked.
“I don’t know. There’s no way we can drive through this. I guess we walk from here.”
“Is that safe?” Bridget asked.
“No. But neither is just sitting here.” I sighed and wiped the sweat from my forehead. “See that hotel?” I pointed to the ten story building half a mile away. “If we could barricade the lower floors we’d have all the room we need there. And it would be easy to defend. No electricity means no elevators, so we just have to block the stairway and there’s no way those things could get to us. There’s gotta be all kind of supplies in there, too. The only thing we’d need to go out for would be food.”
“We could even plant a garden on the roof or on the balconies.” Amber added.
“That’s a long walk, Becca.” Dad complained. “I don’t know if your mother is up to that.”
“Bridget and David can help with her. We have to get going.”
“What about me?” Amber asked.
“I need another set of eyes and another gun in case we’re attacked.”
“Are you sure about this?” Dad asked.
“Yes. Everyone get what you can easily carry. Forget the clothes and things, just get food and weapons.”
“Got it.” Bridget said. She took off toward the car. David followed her. I think he likes her. I feel bad for them, that only leads to heartbreak.
“Dad,” I closed my eyes and took a deep breath. “If we’re rushed by a bunch of those things, I want you and Bridget and David to get to safety. I’ll take care of Mom.”
“I’m not leaving her.”
“We have to make sure everyone else is safe, Dad.”
“Bridget should go, but I’m staying with your mother.”
“Well hopefully it doesn’t come to that.”
That would suck. To have to let Mom die to protect the others. Apparently making these decisions is my role in life now. I’m not allowed to be happy. At all. Honestly, I don’t know what I’m going to do once we’re safely in that hotel. Do I have any use at that point? Maybe I should just walk into a crowd of those things and see if I really am immune.
We had to walk over several bodies. Do you know how bad a pile of ten thousand dead bodies rotting in the Texas summer sun can smell? There were small animals taking advantage of the easy meal. It’s so disgusting.
Amber and I walked in front, watching side streets, alleys, looking up at windows, checking for any signs of movement. I did see some infected people meandering around, but they were blocks away, and they didn’t even seem to notice us.
“I’ll go do a quick sweep of the lower floor, you all stay here.”
“Hurry.” Bridget said.
“Um,” I glanced around at everyone. All eyes were on me. “Anything happens, Amber is in charge.” Because Mom and Dad are more useless than a four year old right now.
I went into the hotel lobby. There were four dead bodies sitting in chairs, all with gunshots to the head. They look like they were relaxed, and one of them still has a gun, so I imagine he shot the other three, then himself.
There was a body that had been chewed to pieces hanging over the front desk. Flies everywhere, and the stench was awful. I checked the bathrooms, they were clear, though one toilet was clogged and the whole place smelled. The rest of the lower floor was clear also.
“You can come in.” I told them. “You’ll probably want to stay over at that side.” I said, directing them away from all the dead bodies. “Bridget and David, you keep an eye out in the front. Anything moves out there, shoot it. Amber, we’re checking the next floor. You take that stairway, I’ll take this one.”
“Got it.” she said.
“Be careful not to shoot me when we meet up on the next floor.”
I wish Tasha were here to do this instead of Amber. I trust Amber, but I trust Tasha more. I miss her so much. Gotta get over it. She’s safe. That’s what is important.
There was nobody in the stairway, and in the hallway I met up with Amber. We started opening doors. They all have the electronic key card locks, but none of them are locked. There’s a lot of luggage in these rooms. Maybe we’ll be able to find some good clothing in them later on.
“Should we tell them, or go on checking the higher floors?” she asked me.
“If we move them up here for now it’s going to be safer than out there in the lobby. And then we can check the rest of the floors afterward. They’ll be more comfortable up here anyway. Mom can lay down.”
We helped them up to the second floor and into a room. I gave David and Bridget instructions to watch the stairs, in case someone tries to come up. Amber and I spent three hours checking the other ten floors. Turns out there are 12 floors on this building.
“Okay, Dad.” I said. “Do you think we can chain the doors to the stairs shut?”
“I don’t know. What do you think, Rebecca?”
“I have no idea, that’s why I asked you.”
“Whatever you think.”
“Dammit, Dad! I think you need to step up and help me out here.” I started crying. “I can’t do everything.”
“There’s nothing to hook a chain to.” David said. “There’s the door handle, but nothing on the wall for it to connect to.”
“Great. So anyone have an idea how to seal those things off?”
“We could bolt a loop onto the door frame.” Dad said. He finally woke up and decided to contribute, I guess. “We’d need a drill, and some kind of hook. You could probably find some kind of hasp at a hardware store, actually. Then you wouldn’t need the chain at all.”
“How do we use a drill with no power?” Bridget asked.
“Cordless drill.” David said.
“Well what I’m thinking is we seal up the bottom floor, and we move to the top. And then we seal the doors onto that floor, too, as a backup.”
“Where do we get a drill, or the hasps?” Bridget asked.
“I guess I’m going to go look for a hardware store.” I said.
“I’ll go along.” Amber told me. She gave me a little smile.
“I’m not putting anyone else at risk. I’ll go alone. You stay here and keep everyone safe.”
“You don’t even know what a hasp is, do you?” David asked. “I’ll come along.”
> “No, David, she said you’re staying here.” Amber told him.
“He’s right though. I need him to come.”
“Becca, no. I’ll come. Let him stay.” she said.
“Do you know what we’ll need?” I asked her.
“No, but he can describe it. We’ll figure it out.”
“Sorry Amber, but he needs to come.”
“But,”
“I’ll take care of your brother. I promise. You just take care of my family.”
“If we hurry we could be back before dark.” David said.
We hurried away from the hotel hoping not to draw any of the infected to the hotel. It took a while to find a hardware store. And when we did, there was a couple of infected people moving around in front of it. David raised his gun on them, but I stopped him from shooting.
“The noise will just draw more of them to us.” I explained.
“Oh. Yeah, I guess.”
We waited twenty minutes until they moved away from the door enough that we could get past them without being seen. Once inside, David found the hasps right away.
“We’ll need four.” I said. “And four locks.”
“Why mess with locks? All we really need are some big sprint clips. We’re not locking anyone in, we just need something so it can’t be opened from the other side.”
“Okay, whatever. That’s fine. Let’s just hurry.”
“We have to find drills. And then pray that there are some with batteries charged up.”
We were able to find some drills with some batteries. David made sure we had spare batteries, and he even mentioned the idea of finding a car and using a power inverter to charge the batteries if we need to. He also made sure to get several extra drill bits, which is something I wouldn’t have thought to get even one of.
“Hey.” he said, pointing down an aisle as we were leaving. “We should get some of those.”
“What?”
“Crossbows. They’re silent. If we need to kill one of those things we wouldn’t make a lot of noise and draw others our way.”
“You know how to use a crossbow?”
“No, but we could figure it out.”
“I guess we could take one now and figure it out. If it works, we could get another some time.”
We got back to the hotel a little after dark. David and Amber went to install the locks. She stood guard while he did his thing. It’s good he’s handy with stuff like this. He’s a good kid to have around. Dad is a complete waste of time right now. I wonder if it’ll ever change.
It didn’t take them long to install the hasps, actually. I was surprised. So we headed up to the top floor after that. I helped Dad get Mom up the stairs. She’s so bad now. She hardly even talks. I don’t know if she’s sick or just mentally checking out on us. Kind of like Dad, only worse.
“Mom and Dad, you guys take this room.” I said. It was the first we came to.
“I’ll share with you, Becca.” Bridget said.
I kind of zoned out there for a few seconds. I was thinking of Tasha. How we’d have our own room here, and it would be big and comfortable. We’d have a balcony, and we’d take the one clear at the other end of the hall, so we’d have some privacy. Or maybe even we’d move to a different floor. We’d have our own floor. Instead I’m here alone.
“I think you should let Becca have a room to herself.” Amber told her quietly.
“Well then will you share with me again?” Bridget asked. “I don’t want to be alone.”
“Yeah. Let’s just take this one.”
“David, as soon as you get your stuff in your room, can you please try putting the hasps on the doors to the stairs?” I asked him.
“Yeah, no problem.”
I went to the other end of the hall. All by myself. I prefer it this way. I hate being alone, sort of terrified of it, but the only one who really knows how terrified I am is Tasha. And she’s not here to protect me from my overactive imagination. I wish I could just go to sleep and not wake up. I got my family here, they’re safe. Safe-ish. The only time they will ever need to leave this place is to get food, and if they do what Amber was saying they can have a rooftop garden soon to help with that. They could probably get cages and raise chickens, too. They don’t really need me now.
Friday, May 20th
“Becca.” Bridget said after knocking. “Can I come in?”
No. I guess I haven’t been much fun for the past few days. I’ve left the room three times. Once to check on all the locks to see if they would hold, twice to eat.
“Becca?” Bridget was at the end of the bed now. “Are you sick?”
“No.” I mumbled.
“David is wanting to go up to the roof and practice with the crossbow. Is that okay?”
“Yeah.”
“Don’t you want to come?”
“No.”
“Are you okay?” She sat next to me. She really looks worried. “You look sick. You haven’t been eating.”
“I’m okay.” I grabbed her hand and squeezed it. “Go have fun.”
“You sure?”
“I’m sure.”
She leaned down and hugged me, then left me there. She looks so worried. I must look like I’ve spent a week in bed. I have. Or at least most of one. Not really a lot of point getting out of bed if I have nothing to do. Except I do have something to do.
I got up and washed up a little, ran a comb through my hair and put it in a pony tail. I put on some fresh clothes that Amber found in some luggage two days ago and brought me. I filled a backpack with some extra ammo and a couple of cans of tuna.
“Mom.” I sat beside her. Dad is gone. Probably up with the others, learning to shoot a crossbow. That’s the most initiative he’s shown in weeks, if he is up there. “You awake?”
“Hi honey. I haven’t seen you for a few days.”
“How are you doing?”
“I’m getting better.”
“Good.” I leaned down and hugged her. “I really hope so.”
“Bridget is worried about you.”
“I know.” I scooted away from Mom and looked over at the door. “You know I love you, right?”
“Of course, honey. I love you too.”
“I’m leaving.”
“Oh? Going for more supplies? When do you think you’ll be back?”
“Um,” I took a deep breath. “I doubt I’ll ever be back.” I started crying. “I will if I can.”
“Rebecca, honey, what are you talking about?”
“I can’t do this without Tasha.” I rubbed my eyes. “I don’t even know if I want to live anymore. I just... I need her. It’s like I’ve been ripped into pieces, and I just... I just... I have to find her.”
“Of course you do.” she said. “Promise me you’ll try to be safe. Promise me you’ll come back.”
“I’ll do my best.” I said.
“Come give me a hug.”
She held her arms out and I leaned down and hugged her. She seems so fragile now. I don’t know what happened to her.
“I’m sorry we couldn’t do more for you, Rebecca. I wish we could have given you a better life.” Mom told me.
“You guys did great. Up until this all happened there was nothing I would have changed.”
“When you find her, you make sure she knows how much she means to you.”
“I will. I have to go now. I love you.”
I went up to the roof. Dad was standing with the others, watching David shoot the crossbow at a target they had set up. He was smiling. That’s the first time I’ve seen a genuine smile from him since before this all started.
“Hey.” I said.
“Is your mother sick?” he asked.
“No, that’s not why I’m up here.”
“Decided to give the crossbow a try, huh?” David said.
“Nope.” I put an arm around Dad, giving him a little hug. “I got you guys here safe.” I said. I feel silly taking credit for all of it, but it’s mostly true. “Now
I have to go.”
“Go where?” Bridget asked.
“To find Tasha.” Amber answered for me. “I’m surprised you waited so long.”
“You can’t leave.” David told me.
“Sorry, I have to.”
“We’ll all go.” Bridget said. “We’ll come with you.”
“No. I had to make sure you were safe. Now you’re as safe as I can get you. Now I need to go.”
“Rebecca, are you sure about this?” Dad asked.
“Yes.”
“You can’t go!” Bridget said. She wrapped her arms around me. “We still need you. Please. Becca!”
“Honey, I know you’re scared. You’re going to be okay now.”
“But what about you?”
“I’ll be okay.”
“Liar.”
“Whether I’m okay or not, I have to go.”
“You don’t have to go.”
“I do. Bridget, I hope you’ll understand this one day. But I do have to go.”
“But what about us?”
“You’re going to be okay.”
“But... well none of us are any good at figuring things out. We’re going to do something stupid and get killed. You have to be here to keep us from being stupid.”
“You don’t need me.”
“We do.”
She’s sobbing like a baby now. Please Bridget, just stop. I pulled her across the roof, away from the others, so I could talk to her. I sat down and pulled her beside me.
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