Sunshine and Rain (City Limits Book 2)
Page 23
“None of that’s worth much without this, though.” With the pads of his fingers, he tapped on my chest, right in the middle. “That’s what I’m really after because that’s the best part. You might think I’m young, and I don’t know what I’m doing, or that I don’t know what I want. You’re not ready for this. I am, but I’m damn good at waiting for you, Sunshine.”
His hips rolled into mine. My back arched off his warm sheets.
When he spoke, his breath tickled my skin with the vibration from his low timbre. “I can assure you, if you give me this I won’t slow down anymore. When you give me this, I’m gonna want it all. I know I will. I’ll want you to move in. I’ll want to marry you. I’ll want to have babies and take vacations and have a life with you. And, you know what? It doesn’t have a damn thing to do with how I felt as a kid. It’s got nothing to do with how beautiful you are. Nothing to do with how you turn me on. It has everything to do with this.” He tapped at my breastbone again, and then he patted his chest and said, “And this. These don’t age. In here, there’s no young and old. Trust me—it’s always felt the same.”
I think that’s when I fell in love with him. Then again, maybe I’d already been in love with Rhett. Regardless, it was the first time I almost said it.
The words were sweet on my tongue and I lifted my head to share the way they tasted with him.
I still didn’t know what to say, but I prayed he knew what I meant anyway.
We’d had a lot of sex that summer. He’d made me climb the walls with pleasure countless times, but that night was different. There was a feeling of apology and forgiveness. Fueled by tension and soothed by intimacy.
It grounded me to the Earth and things connected from my head to my heart. I wondered if Rhett could be the one.
The One.
I had no desire to argue with her. I realized that the minute I saw her taillights fade away in the opposite direction of my house. I’d expected her to call the next morning and possibly let me have it.
So, I held back. I did.
It took another glass of whiskey and some serious debating between Andy and me.
I thought about it like testing a theory. If I gave her space, would she come back to me on her own? I just didn’t know how long my resolve would hold out before I went to her.
I thought about how good it might feel when she did come back. Sadly, it was bittersweet and not just sweet. We were equally stubborn and sorry.
But, my theory held true. When I held back, she gave me more.
Until that night, I’d never had make-up sex. You hear about it and you hardly believe the hype, but there was something to it.
Sunny held on tighter than before. I pushed harder than before.
She rode me in the center of my bed while the wind slammed pecan tree limbs against my metal roof. While the thunder rolled and the rain fell in buckets, we found some sort of common ground.
There were things left unresolved, but we were together and that felt most important.
Later, as we lay corner to corner on the mattress, catching our breath, she fell asleep on my chest. My heavy eyes fell shut as the speed of my fingers, stroking up and down her naked back, slowed to a stop.
That weekend was kind of quiet. We watched a lot of TV and pretty much lounged around. Sunday evening, after we both skipped out on our parents, she said she needed to do some laundry and went home.
I did a few things outside until it got dark, then I ate and fell asleep in the chair in my living room.
When I woke up around three-thirty the next morning, I decided I’d just run off some energy instead of going back to bed. My feet hit the smooth lane, running down one side of the gravel as the birds started chirping.
There was something about running that cleared my head. It felt almost cleansing.
Then, over the next few weeks, I became more diligent preparing for the race. Steadily, I added to my distance as my stamina increased back to competition strength.
Things with Sunny went back to the way they had been before the barbeque at the Renfros’. Only we weren’t spending as much time together. I pulled back some, but she actually did, too.
It was strange. I craved her more than anything, but, on days when we didn’t see each other, she’d begun to reach out to me in new ways. Sending me naughty texts was one of my favorites. Or she’d call me before she went to bed. Her voice would be soft at first then turn sultrier as she tired.
On my birthday, she gave me a personal shout-out on the radio and played my favorite songs the whole day. My dad called me three times. Not to say anything, but to hold his phone up to the stereo when he heard one he loved, too.
She bought me a really great pair of running shoes and brought me beer from the kitchen while she made me tacos in her underwear. We had sex in my living room, then ate strawberries and chugged Crystal Gayle naked in front of my refrigerator before we went to bed.
I mean, it was a pretty damn good day.
Even though spending so much time with her in the beginning felt good at the moment, I was seeing the merits of letting things happen on their own.
I wanted to tell her I loved her every time we spoke or saw each other, but I couldn’t do it. Not when the less was more approach was working so well. Then again, holding back didn’t feel exactly right either.
I’d had this great idea to take her on a trip in the fall to a cabin one of our hunters owned, but I stalled. Then the plans fell through. Additionally, after not seeing her for two long days, I found her on my bed naked when I got home from work. I decided being patient wasn’t killing me.
I appreciated the benefits of taking things at her pace, but wanting her more, and getting her less felt foolish at times—like when we weren’t together.
“So you’re just going alone?” Haley asked.
The race was that weekend, and I was ready for it. She was heading back to college the next day and came to hang out with me on her last night in Wynne.
Neither Sunny nor I had mentioned that weekend since our squabble at the Renfros’. I supposed it wasn’t worth fighting about anyway. She had her plans, and I had mine.
Although it kind of sucked that she hadn’t asked me to go on her own, I had to accept that I hadn’t asked her to come to Nashville either.
I stretched my legs out and took another bite of the cake our mom had sent with my sister. After swallowing, I answered, “Yeah, it’s cool. I’ll be focused more and probably have a great race.” My times were decent and my pacing was good. But, my focus? Well, it had been elsewhere.
“You’ll do fine, but why don’t you ever bring her to the farm?” she asked.
My whole family had asked me about that, in one way or another. I was creative with my answers.
“What … and have you guys ask her a million questions?” Which was very likely, and—reality notwithstanding—a perfectly logical reason. They would totally grill her, but Sunny could handle it. She talked just about as much as they did.
The truth was I never wanted to backtrack with her again. That’s what our first fight felt like.
A step back.
I didn’t know if it was the farmer in me who would rather work all night rather than backtracking to work even one acre of ground twice. Or maybe it was the runner in me who never wanted to look behind at what made me stumble. Could have been both.
I always wanted to move forward. Hit my distances, finish the job. That was the goal either way. Get it done. Cross the line.
With Sunny, however, I wasn’t in a hurry to do that. I never wanted to be finished. So, I had to adjust my pace, even if that meant doing something that was so far from my nature. Uncomfortable and frustrating as it was, I wasn’t adding any pressure to her or us.
And we weren’t moving forward very fast. We just were. So no matter how great it was, the current was weak and I missed the rush.
“We wouldn’t be that bad and you know it.” My sister genuinely looked hurt, her head leaning to the sid
e, her eyes skeptical. “We know this isn’t just some girl, Rhett. She’s Sunny.”
“I know,” I admitted. Tossing the paper plate in the trash, I pulled off my cap and scratched my head.
Of all people, I was well aware of who the hell I was with.
Haley chided, “You’re forgetting something, though. You’re Rhett Caraway.”
I pulled the back of my cap taut and tugged the bill over my eyes.
She kicked my boot. “Seriously, dude. Do you even remember how many girls went after you in high school? Followed you around? Came to all of your track meets? I had girls coming up to me wanting to know about you. You’re Rhett Fucking Caraway, the Crowned Prince of Wynne.”
I looked her way, and she rolled her eyes.
“The whole damn town is pulling for you two to get together. I’m sure it’s pretty obnoxious—I’ve been around when people have brought it up to you. But, Rhett, they can’t help it. Everyone loves both of you. Everyone knows it’s”—she paused and her eyes danced across the ceiling looking for the right word—“it’s special. You guys might hide away for now, but we all saw you earlier this summer. You two didn’t shut up the whole day at the levee when I was around you. The way she looks at you. The way you sweat so damn much when you’re around her—that has to be some neanderthalic male tendency. Pheromones or something. Either way, it’s totally obvious.”
What was I supposed to do with all of that information?
“I get it, Hal. I do. That doesn’t change anything. We’re good.” In fact, I was about to call her before my sister commandeered my night. I was leaving in a few days and I needed to see her a little more before I left.
Haley dramatically rolled out of her chair to the ground, growling. “You don’t get it. You two are good? Rhett, you two could be great.” She stood up and dusted herself off, pointing a stern finger at me. “You think about that, brah. Now, give me a hug, I need to go home.”
We could be great.
That was awesome news, but apparently she wasn’t going to tell me how.
I put my arm around her shoulder and smashed her head against me. Her arm loosely wrapped around my waist.
“Stop. Hug me right,” she demanded. When I let up, she spoke into my t-shirt. “Just don’t let this be the first thing you really ever half-assed, Rhett.”
My sister was cool. A brat, but definitely a cool one.
“Are you sure you want to go back to that old dorm so early?” I hugged her like a brother hugs a sister. Like Haley and I always had. One arm above a shoulder. One arm below.
“Oh, I’m sure. I haven’t seen him in two months and I’m about to die.”
Him? She’d said she was going back early to spend time with Carrie, since they were both RAs. Carrie wasn’t a chick?
I pushed her an arm’s length away. “So, Carrie is a Carey?” I clarified. She hadn’t shut up about her friend all summer.
My jaw hung open. The little shit had pulled a fast one on all of us.
She pursed her lips together and looked pleased with herself. “It’s all true and I didn’t leave anything out. We’re just friends—so far. I get taking your time better than anyone. But, I’m going back to school, and I’m making a move.” As she skipped through my kitchen she hollered, “See you at Thanksgiving, pussy.”
“What are you doing over there?” I asked Sunny as I held my cellphone to my ear.
She was winded when she answered the call after fumbling with the phone before saying hello. “Nothing. Just doing some stretches.” She coughed and laughed. “Andy bet me I couldn’t touch my toes. He lost, but I broke my ass falling over. It’s a bittersweet victory.”
I chuckled and thought about her lying on the floor.
“What are you doing?” she asked.
“Oh, just something I’ve been putting off for the last few weeks.”
“Like what? I’m the biggest procrastinator in the world. If you don’t want to do it you could probably wait until next week.” She laughed. “You’ve already waited this long. See? That’s how you procrastinate.”
After my sister left, I started thinking about a conversation Sunny and I’d shared a long time ago and realized it was my move. Maybe she’d been telling me in her own way for a while now.
I said, “Open your door and find out.”
What the what?
I scrambled off the floor and peeked out the window behind the couch. Sure as hell, he was standing on my front porch. I wondered about how much of that he’d seen. I was actually trying to do yoga, but my coordination sucked.
I even considered just taking up running after Rhett was done with his race. He’d told me that he only trains like a maniac—like he had been over the past few weeks—before a competition. If he was willing to hang back and let me stay caught up, I wanted to give it a try.
After we’d gotten into the fight at Hannah’s, at first I was worried things were cooling off. They didn’t really, but we weren’t as attached at the hips as we’d been in the first few weeks.
Actually, it gave me a lot of time to think. Within that time, I’d found some pretty fun ways to show him how much he meant to me. I wasn’t as good as he was with the surprises, but I was improving.
The extra time had been good for me. That’s all it really took for me to realize he was everything I wanted. Circumstances be damned. It was the truth.
There was a huge difference between wanting a guy to like and wanting him to like you back. It became very important to know how he felt, and while I was “stretching” I’d realized the best way to find out would be to tell him where I was.
I opened the door and he stepped aside to let the screen past his shoulder.
“Hi,” I said and tried to tame down the grin on my face. He was unexpected, but always welcome.
He stood there with flowers in his hands. It was the strangest bouquet I’d ever seen. Nothing matched, and it looked more bunched than arranged like the ones from the florist at the store. Leafy and wild, he held them out to me.
“I felt like bringing you some flowers. So, I did it.”
I started to leap into his arms but paused, fearful he’d fall backwards off the steps. That was the last thing he needed before a marathon. And instead of moving I spoke, impulsively.
“I love y…” I said and slapped my hand over my mouth.
He looked from me to the flowers. “Most of these are weeds, but I thought … wait. What did you say?” He shook his head and then peeled my fingers off my mouth. His face changed from sweet to dead serious.
“…them. I love them.” I laughed like a maniac and bit my bottom lip, unsure if it was about to almost pop out again. I straightened, and the only thing I could think to do was blink.
So I blinked over and over like it might clear away my clumsy tongue. Then again, I’d been biting the words back for weeks, afraid it was too soon.
“You almost threw me there,” he confessed as he took a step back, then another in my direction after his balance wavered.
I’d nearly thrown myself, too. Right off an embarrassing cliff.
My hand moved out to steady him.
“They’re beautiful,” I said.
“Did you almost say…?” He squinted and licked the corner of his mouth.
My heart raced. I was busted. Kind of. I mean, I hadn’t actually said it all the way.
I smiled brightly and nodded my head noncommittally. My ability to control speech was all messed up and suddenly words jammed up in my throat.
“Are you trying to tell me I could have saved hundreds of dollars by giving you stolen flowers all of these years?”
He let me off the hook, but I supposed it was true. It never was about what he gave me, only that he had.
I stepped back and let him in the door; as vulnerable as I felt, I had the urge to move around. I took the flowers into the kitchen and retrieved a vase from under the sink as he said hello to Andy.
They really were kind of pretty. Yellow, orange, bl
ue, and red. All randomly mixed up. While I arranged them in the water, I pretended that what I damn near said hadn’t really happened. That seemed like the best move. Ignore and move on.
“Are you ready to hit the road tomorrow?” I asked. The race felt like a safe topic.
Rhett’s chest pressed against my back and my eyes fell shut having missed him the whole day. “Yeah, I’m all set.” His hands wrapped around me, and he pressed a kiss into my hair.
When there wasn’t anything left to do with the stolen bouquet, I turned in his arms. His legs parted and flanked mine as I leaned back against the sink.
“So you love the flowers, huh?” he asked.
With my head tipped up to look into his eyes, I found his smile first and stopped there to appreciate it. His full lips were kissable, looking warm and soft.
“I think I do,” I answered, but I knew what he was getting at. He didn’t make a meal of it by toying with me though.
He asked, “You gonna miss me when I’m gone this weekend?”
More than I would have ever guessed.
He was leaving to go to Nashville, and I was planning on going to the bar for the alumni “night out.” It didn’t sound all that fun, but Hannah and Vaughn would be there. At least I could hang with them.
“I always miss you when you’re not around,” I confessed. Apparently, I’d hit my head on the ground or something when I fell because I was all about letting whatever I wanted fall out of my mouth. “You’re my boyfriend, Rhett. I want you around all the time.”
His smiled widened. “I’m glad to hear it,” he said. “Are you ready for your big weekend?”
If by ready he meant dreading, then yeah. I was as ready as I’d ever be.
“Actually, I’ll be glad when it’s over.”
I left off the fact that I really wished he was going with me—I knew I could behave better than the last time we’d been around people. I was sure of it, but now I didn’t want him to miss his race. I knew how hard he’d been training, and I was excited for him.