Hope (Things That Matter Book 2)

by Casey Diam

  She did a little move like she was having a seizure with her hands twitching at her sides. I liked that I got to see both the worst and the best sides of this girl, and this was the fucking best, but I needed her cute ass in this bed. She peeled her shirt over her head, tossed it to the side, and then the strapless bra she had on went next.

  My eyebrows rose. This I could definitely watch.

  Her hands went to the back of her skirt, and she fidgeted for the longest time, even stumbling forward in the process.

  I would rip it off her if I had to.

  “Come to me.” Licking my lips, I watched her walk toward the bed.

  Damn, I love her boobs.

  “Can I tell you something?” she asked, crawling onto the bed and lying flat on her stomach. Her arms collapsed onto the bed above her head. “I’m really tired. I wasn’t tired, but I’m so tired now.”

  “It’s okay.”

  Getting up from the bed, I unbuckled my jeans, stripped out of my shirt, and threw it on a chair close by along with my jeans, leaving only my boxers on. Then I knelt on the bed, found the tiny zipper on the back of her skirt, and unzipped it. That dance might have been a bit too tiring for her because she was fucking done. She didn’t even move as I tried to remove her skirt.

  “That wasn’t my sexy dance, by the way,” she mumbled. “Just in case you were wondering.”

  It seemed she didn’t realize I’d been watching her the night I saw her at the club with Lisa and Amber. I knew very well that hadn’t been her sexy dance. But I would never forget it.

  Pulling the sheets from the bed, I covered her, and left to turn off the lights.

  Chapter Twenty-Three

  Paige

  It was late when I woke up. Or early. I propped myself up on an elbow to peer over Caleb’s body to the darkness outside through the window. Then I dropped my head back down onto the pillow. My head was so heavy and my throat dry. Every organ in my body felt shriveled up, as if I hadn’t had water in days. I didn’t even know where my phone was or Mickey.

  Did she come up last night?

  Careful not to wake Caleb, I rolled out of the bed and used the moon’s soft glow to guide me to the chair where I’d placed my backpack. After slipping into a pair of joggers and a tank top, I walked out of the room, squinting at the bright lights left on in the living area even though no one was in here. The door to Mickey’s room was cracked, and when I pushed it open, the light from the living room spilled inside and onto an empty bed.

  Where is she, and what time is it?

  The sandals I’d had on earlier were smack dab in the living room.

  What the hell? When did those get there?

  Slipping them on, I hurried down the stairs to the door separating this level from the others. There was still music playing, though at a much lower volume than when the party had been in full swing. I didn’t hear any talking either, and when I reached the first floor, I realized it was because no one else was awake. Three people were passed out on the couch, and that was all. Feeling the dryness in my throat again, I remembered our groceries were still down here. I walked over to the kitchen cabinet and rummaged through a bag for my bottle of water.

  As I pushed the cupboard door closed and before I could turn around, a deep voice said, “It looks like someone else is still up.”

  Startled, I turned to see a tall guy with low-cut, dark hair, his eyes glazed over, leaning against a counter a few feet away.

  “Yeah, I was thirsty and looking for a friend,” I said, holding the large bottle to my chest and unscrewing it.

  Giving me a lopsided grin, he folded his hands across his chest. “I could be your friend.”

  “No, I meant, I’m looking for my friend. Not anyone.” Creep.

  “Oh, yeah, that’s right. You know, your friends are kind of slutty. What are you doing hanging with them if you aren’t looking to hop on the same train?”

  “You’re a douche bag, and my friends aren’t sluts.” Feeling myself starting to get worked up, I began to walk away. I still needed to find Mickey.

  “So, your precious friend who was licking my buddy’s balls earlier in the woods isn’t a slut?”

  “No, and I’m pretty sure they wouldn’t be sluts if they were over here, offering to lick your balls.”

  “Bitch,” he muttered.

  I rolled my eyes. “Your participation wasn’t necessary, but thanks for proving my point.”

  As I turned to head out of the kitchen, Mickey budged around the corner from the hallway, and relief flooded me.

  “Whatever. You and that bitch can get lost. The only reason she isn’t whoring is because nobody wants her,” Douche Bag said from behind me.

  I watched as Mickey’s face fell before looking to the side, as if someone else was with her.

  I spun around. “You’re an asshole.”

  “I just tell the truth, and she doesn’t belong.”

  “So fucking disrespectful. Are you so desperate that all you can do is degrade women who want nothing to do with you? This is her house, and you should leave.”

  “Yeah, well, I pooled money like everyone else. Just because it’s her house, it doesn’t mean she’s invited.”

  “What?” Dropping my bottle, I was in front of him in less than a second. I didn’t care if he was twice my size. I grabbed his wrist, sinking my fingers into the pressure points there. He hissed, bending into the source of the pain. “What the fuck is the matter with you?”

  I lifted my other hand to wrap around his throat since he was at my mercy, but before it could happen, I was yanked away and lifted into the air from behind. Then Luke was in front of me, blocking my view, but my heartbeat had kicked up a notch, and there was no stopping me.

  I tried to fight off the person holding on to me, but strong arms wrapped even tighter around me, pulling me into a solid chest. “Let me go.”

  “You can’t,” Caleb said in my ear.

  “I don’t care. Because it’s assholes like him”—I pointed my finger—“who take advantage of people who’ve done fricking nothing to them. And it’s people like him who make this whole fucking world so cruel,” I raged. “And he needs to be sorry. He isn’t sorry, Caleb.” Suddenly, I wasn’t only talking about this douche. “He isn’t sorry.”

  “Shh.” Caleb’s lips brushed my ear. “Did he touch you?”

  He lowered me so my feet touched the floor but kept his hands on my hips, securing me to his front. I shook my head, frustrated as hell as I watched Luke ushering the asshole to the front of the house and through the doors.

  My therapist’s voice spilled from my subconscious amid the chaos in my head.

  “Thoughts. Feelings. Behaviors. Your thoughts create feelings. Feelings influence how we act...”

  What have I done? Would a normal person have reacted this way? Everyone probably thinks I am crazy now.

  Caleb kissed my temple, and I sucked in a breath.

  With shame churning in my gut, I looked at Mickey. “I’m sorry. He was a dick. You shouldn’t have people like that in your house.”

  “I know. But it’s okay. I never come here,” Mickey said.

  And, with that, I remembered how sweet she could be, even to people who didn’t deserve it.

  “Still, he’s a douche. A scum douche-hole. God, I wanted to hurt him.” I scowled. “I should have snapped his wrist when I had the chance.”

  Mickey pursed her lips as she tried to hide her smile. “You always did have a temper.”

  “I did?” This was news.

  “Yeah.”

  “Really?”

  Maybe I’m not that far gone?

  But I knew better. It was different. There was a darkness in me that shouldn’t be this near to Mickey, but I smiled at the innocent radiance in her.

  “All this time, I thought the craziness was only recent.”

  Mickey and I laughed.

  I slipped out of Caleb’s hold to hug her. “I missed you.”

  “I missed you
, too.” She stepped back and considered my face. “Just so you know, it was never that you looked for trouble when we were young, but whenever it came, you were always ready.” She grinned. “I can’t believe you don’t remember. I think the most memorable was when you confronted your sister’s boyfriend in school.”

  A gasp erupted from my throat, followed by an instant well of tears in my eyes.

  “I’m sorry. I didn’t—”

  “No, no. It’s okay.” I hushed her, knowing exactly what I’d done. For years, I’d forced myself to forget. There was so much I’d refused to think about, but it was time I started to remember. “Thank you,” I told her.

  “What? I should be thanking you.”

  I shook my head. “I left, Mickey. I left everyone behind, and I’m so sorry.” I wrapped my arms around her neck, hugging her until I saw Luke.

  “I locked him outside. He can get his shit and leave when he sobers up,” he grunted.

  “Okay, thank you. I’ll see you in the morning, Micks.”

  I turned to see Caleb with my bottle of water in his hand. A sheepish grin passed my lips.

  All of that just happened.

  I lifted a hand and scratched my head as I stared at him, but he just smiled and threw an arm around my shoulders. It was fair to say, he was used to my crazy.

  ❧

  When we got to the room, I switched on the light, but as Caleb closed the door, I switched it off again. Walking to the window, I peered outside. The walking paths were lit, and the wind was blowing the dark, limber branches on a few trees near the property. The view from our room was from the side of the house, but I could see a glimpse of the parking lot in front. I didn’t know what I was looking for at first, but then I realized it was the douche bag from earlier and maybe, just maybe, one of Alex Connor’s men.

  Caleb came up from behind, jolting me out of my head.

  “You okay? He didn’t touch you, did he?” he asked for the second time tonight.

  One of his hands settled on my hip, and I wanted to lean into him, but I couldn’t yet. I would become distracted before I could tell him what I needed to.

  “No.” I stared into the darkness for a few more seconds and then said, “I’m ready, Caleb.”

  “Ready for what?”

  “I’m going to see Bailey when I get back. Tomorrow, I’ll text Graham about getting me back on the schedule at the gym. Then I want to go back to the mansion to see if I can find anything that might give us some answers.”

  “Paige”—he turned my body to face him and then curled his fingers into my hair—“that’s a lot to think about right now. You’ve only slept for three hours, and you still have alcohol in your system.”

  “It doesn’t matter how much sleep I’ve gotten or what I’ve drank. This has always been the plan.”

  I moved away from him, but only because I felt exposed standing in the open window. No one could see inside with the lights off, but still, it made my spine tingle with awareness. Like Alex Connor had some long-range shooters on standby, ready to take me out. I hated this. I hated thinking like this, but it wouldn’t go away. Not while he was still out there.

  “It’s only been three weeks, and I don’t want you to put yourself in danger. You can talk to Bailey, and I’ll even take you back to that house, but don’t go to the gym, Paige. It isn’t necessary.”

  I made my way to the other side of the room and switched on the light. I turned to Caleb. “It is necessary. I’ve been working there since I was sixteen, and I love working there.” I thought about the Dungeon I’d trained in and the fighters I’d trained with and Andy with his stupid Popeye the Sailor Man tattoo on his bicep. “I miss them.”

  “Okay, I know, but can we wait? There are some things I need to figure out first.”

  He was still standing by the window, and it was freaking me out. I looked away, feeling the onset of a headache.

  “What things?”

  “Well, first, I need to figure out why Connor wants to see me this weekend, and then I’ll go from there.”

  He finally stepped away from the window, and a breath of relief passed my lips.

  Peeling off his shirt, he threw it on a nearby chair and sauntered toward me. My eyes lowered to the hard ridges of his stomach and down to the two distended veins snaking out of his jeans. I swallowed, longing to trace those veins with my tongue.

  My gaze flicked up to his dark eyes as he rested his hands on my shoulders and squeezed.

  “There’s something I haven’t told you.”

  With him this close, all I wanted to do—and what I found myself doing, was smoothing my hand up and down the hard ridges of his chest and abs, feeling as it contracted beneath my touch. I reached farther down to the rough material of his jeans and then over the powerful erection beneath. He let out a sigh, and I saw the yearning in his heavy-lidded eyes as they flitted between my lips and eyes. My own vision hazed as his hand went up under my tank and covered my breast.

  We stared at each other, feeding off the all-consuming need burning between our bodies. My fingers undid his zipper, moved up to his buckle, and then went to the small metal button on his jeans. As his fingers manipulated my nipples, a sigh escaped my lips. His mouth descended on mine, hard and possessive as he backed me into a wall. My hand dipped into his boxers to grip the immense package waiting there. It was warm and smooth, and I wanted it.

  Oh God, I want it so bad.

  His groan sent a sweet ache to my sex, and I leaned my head against the wall, my eyelids heavy as heat and want took over my body.

  “Caleb,” I purred.

  A loud breath left him, the heat of it tingling my lips.

  He moved back enough to pull my tank over my head. “Fuck, I...you have no idea what you do to me.”

  He bent and took one of my nipples into his mouth. I bit my lip, closing my eyes as my body liquefied.

  “I-I need you now. Please,” I begged.

  He stepped back, taking me with him, and then spun around and pushed me down onto the bed. He tugged off my pants, throwing them to the side. Watching him, I bent my knees and dragged my feet up to my butt. As he got his eyeful of me, I let my gaze sweep down his body, stopping at the throbbing length hanging outside of his zipper. I placed my index finger in my mouth, licking and biting, desperate for him as he rid himself of his jeans and boxers. He lifted the jeans, feeling into the pockets.

  “Fuck,” he cursed, throwing them on a corner of the bed, pain in his eyes as he looked down at me.

  I removed the tip of my finger from my mouth. “What is it?”

  “Condom. I...it’s in my wallet in the car.”

  He fisted the thick girth of his cock as his eyes drank in my body. Moving forward, he slid his arms beneath my thighs, his head dipping in between them. The stubble on his jaw scratched the sensitive skin on my inner thighs before a warm tongue pressed to my center. I sighed, my pelvis rising off the bed to meet his continuous lapping, sucking, and that thing he just did with his tongue, like it was dancing about as it slipped between my folds. He was so skilled, so passionate, but my fingers curled into his hair, and I pulled, wanting more.

  Licking my lips, I moaned, “Caleb.”

  He groaned, and my eyelids lowered, watching as he stuck his tongue inside me.

  Oh my God.

  I wanted his cock inside me.

  Screw the condom.

  I wanted to feel him. I needed to feel him.

  “Caleb.”

  His eyes opened, and he stared up at me.

  “Come to me.” I tugged on his hair. “Come now.”

  I sensed his struggle as he lifted his head. But he came. Crawling over me, his body visibly shaking.

  “Paige.” As his cock slid over my center, his body jerked, and he closed his eyes. “This isn’t a good idea,” he rasped.

  His eyes found mine, and I reached between us, guiding the head of his cock into my entrance.

  He tipped his head back, his jaw and body tensing. �
�Fuck.”

  All I could hear from this point was his and my breathing and then a loud gasp as he thrust into me. The raw heat of him slid in and out, and I moaned, the pleasure too much, too intense. I moved my hands over his shoulders as his lips crushed against mine, my body buzzing as he filled me over and over. I bit on his lip as a carnal need mounted, and he gripped my hips, gyrating and plunging. Fucking me as if this were our last time, as if he would never get to fuck me like this again.

  My muscles expanded and contracted around him as he pounded into me, unraveling everything inside and sending me up so high that I nosedived back down, clenching and scratching and biting into anything I could as my body stiffened and trembled. My legs coiled around him, and I cried out, arching and pulling him deeper.

  “Fuck. I have to—” The stubble on his jaw scraped across my cheek, and with panic in his voice, he groaned, “Fuck, Paige.”

  His hand found a way between our tightly knit bodies, and then I was empty yet still squirming from the aftershock as he gave in to his own release.

  He cursed again, and as my breathing evened, I felt a wetness settling at the side of my hip.

  Caleb rolled off me and swore as he ran a hand over his face and through his hair.

  Feeling self-conscious amid satiation, I asked, “What did I do?”

  He shook his head, both hands gripping his hair. “You’re not on the pill.” He sighed. “That was too fucking risky. We can’t have sex without a condom. We shouldn’t have done that.”

  I frowned, moving away from the wet spot in the sheets. Turning away from him, I dragged the rumpled sheets over my body.

  Even though my skin still tingled with warmth and what he’d said made sense, the way he’d said it made me feel so naive.

  “I’m sorry.” His hand came over and gripped my waist, turning my insides into jelly again.

  “It’s fine. I just...”

  What? What do I want? Things to be normal? Different?

  They would never be. Not when Alex Connor was still out there.

  His soft lips pressed a kiss onto my shoulder, and a shiver ran through me. He pulled my shoulder down to the bed, and I tried not to look into his eyes. Anger was stirring inside of me because of his father, and I didn’t want him to think it was because of him.