Silk

by Heidi McLaughlin

  I don’t even try to keep up with him. There are too many people, and we have plenty of time to get to our gate. When I finally get there, I look around for him. He bobs his head up when my eyes find him. His bag is on the seat next to him. He moves it when I walk up.

  “Thanks,” I mumble, sinking into the seat.

  “I lost you back there.”

  I glance at him. “You walk too fast for me.”

  He has the decency to look embarrassed. “You should have said something.”

  I shrug. “I caught up.”

  “True, but it’s rude. I’m sorry.”

  My mouth drops. “You don’t have to apologize for walking fast.”

  He shakes his head. “I’m supposed to be looking out for you.”

  “I’m not a kid. I don’t need a babysitter,” I grumble.

  His mouth twitches before he looks away.

  I reach into my bag for my watch manual.

  “What are you reading?” he asks, leaning over my shoulder.

  I move away from him, and I press the manual to my chest, so he won’t see it. “Nothing.”

  “Is that a manual?” he asks, trying to lift one of my fingers.

  I close my eyes and hand it to him, doing my best to ignore his chuckle. My eyes are still closed when he sets it back down on my lap. My eyes flick open, and I shove the manual back into my bag.

  “That’s a thick manual for a watch.” He picks up my hand and pushes my sleeve back to look at it. “That thing is huge. It’d be big on my wrist.”

  I tug my arm back and pull my sleeve down to cover my watch. “Chunky watches are in right now.”

  One corner of his mouth pulls up. “Did your mom find it in a catalog?”

  I can’t help but smile. “Maybe,” I admit.

  We start boarding not long after. Adam has an aisle seat, so I’ll have to climb over him every time I need to get up. Great.

  On the other side of me is a pretty blonde. She gets an eyeful of Adam and immediately starts a conversation with him over me. The worst part is that he lets her. She leans on the armrest between our seats, her cleavage millimeters from my arm. He doesn’t seem to mind.

  This is not how I pictured this moment. I wanted a chance to reflect and think about Ally. I needed to feel her and have her still be a part of this journey. What I did not need was boobs in my face.

  “Do you want me to switch seats with you?” I grit once we’re in the air.

  “No, I’m good. Did you want the aisle?”

  I smirk at him. “I just thought you might enjoy your conversation better if you were sitting here.”

  He smirks. “That so?”

  “Do you two know each other?” she asks.

  I smile tightly and answer honestly, “Not really.”

  Then, I pull out my watch manual to read while I ignore them. I put it away after I have successfully set the time zone for home. I pull out headphones, so I can watch a movie, and I am surprised when Adam does the same.

  “Which one are you going to watch?” he asks.

  We each have our own screen mounted into the seat in front of us. There is a menu of movies and TV shows available. I shrug as I scroll through them. I was going to watch a chick flick, but I am embarrassed to admit it. I feel like he would judge my choice, so I decide to watch a crime drama instead.

  “I’ll watch it with you,” Adam says, putting his headphones on and touching his screen to get to the same movie.

  “Watch what you want to watch.”

  “I don’t like watching movies alone,” he says as he scrolls through the menu.

  “But we’ll both be wearing headphones,” I argue.

  He shrugs, pulling up the same movie that’s on my screen. He reaches across me and presses the button to start both screens at the same time. The girl in the seat next to mine fumbles with her screen, trying to catch up with ours. I don’t know why this makes me happy, but it does. I like that he didn’t set up her screen.

  During a particularly suspenseful scene, I jump. I glance over at Adam and catch him trying not to laugh.

  Whatever, I think to myself. I’m totally watching that chick flick next.

  A stewardess comes around to pass out drinks, and again not long after with lunch. After the stewardess comes back around to clear our trash, I pause my movie, and Adam stops his as well.

  “You can keep watching. I was just going to go use the restroom.”

  He unbuckles his belt. “I’ll go with you.”

  “I can go to the restroom by myself. I promise, I won’t get lost,” I joke.

  “I know that. I might also need to go.”

  I can’t argue with that logic. He stands, moving back, to let me walk in front of him. I use the tops of the seats to keep my balance as I walk. I’ve never been good at walking on a plane.

  When I get to the restrooms, I grimace. There’s a line. The guy in front of me turns his head back to look at me, and he smiles. I give a polite closed-mouth smile back and jump when Adam comes up close behind me. The guy in front of me sees him and turns his head back around. I glare at Adam.

  He ignores my look and nonchalantly says, “Tight squeeze back here,” to excuse how close he’s standing next to me. “So, what do you think of the movie?”

  I lean against the wall. “That part with the dog freaked me out.”

  His mouth twitches. “I noticed.”

  I turn to face him. “So, why didn’t you want to switch seats? I think that girl is interested in you.”

  He looks up at the ceiling. “I’m not interested in her.”

  I’m curious. “Why not?”

  His gray eyes meet mine. “Just not.”

  I tilt my head. “Well, that clears it up.”

  I see the line has moved, and I take another step forward. Adam follows me even though no one is behind him. Two doors open at the same time.

  I look at him. “Race you.”

  Why did I say that? I wonder.

  I don’t really want to race. I just want to go to the restroom and not trip or fall walking back to my seat. When I open the door, Adam is waiting there for me.

  “I won,” is all he says before walking back toward our seats.

  I roll my eyes and follow him. He stands there, waiting for me, so I can sit first. I try not to laugh when I notice the girl next to us paused her movie as well.

  I slip my headphones back on. He starts both of our movies at the same time again. I check my watch and groan when I realize we aren’t even halfway yet. He must have noticed.

  He’s looking at me and mouths, Okay?

  I nod and look back at the screen.

  After the movie, the girl next to us produces a deck of cards, and we play poker for a while. I so catch Adam sneaking a peek at my hand more than once. I watch my chick flick when playing cards gets boring. I’m a little surprised when Adam decides to watch as well, and I’m less surprised when the girl does too.

  This movie is hotter than I expected. I start feeling flushed after a couple of scenes, and I turn my fan on. I catch Adam suppressing a smile out of the corner of my eye. I wonder if scenes like this affect guys the same way or if they need more nudity.

  I find myself watching him out of the corner of my eye during the steamy parts. I look at him again, only to find him watching me.

  Chapter 9

  I snap my eyes forward in an attempt to play off that he just caught me. I try to get back into the movie, but instead, I’m hyperaware of his presence next to me. I’m fighting an internal battle against sneaking another glance at him.

  I don’t get why I’m having this type of reaction to him. He’s good-looking, but there’s something else, something I can’t explain. In moments like these, when I’m not actively disliking him, I feel a pull to him. We’ll be circling the globe together, and the sensation I feel toward Adam is almost gravitational.

  I wish I could get a read on him. He’s done nice things for me, but he has also been a dick. I get that
he’s here to look out for me, but it really pisses me off when he gets bossy. Like last night, when he wanted to inspect my luggage. What was that about? Then, today, walking all fast, not even paying attention to if I could keep up. Total jerk move. Yes, he apologized, but it was still annoying. It’s hard to stay angry though when he does stuff like buy me breakfast or carry my bag.

  It just doesn’t seem smart to crush on him, considering I’ll be stuck with him for the next two months. Besides, this trip is supposed to be about finding myself and Ally. What kind of niece am I to already be so distracted? He is Captain Distraction.

  I’m so wrapped up in my brain that I don’t notice the movie has ended until Adam reaches up to stop it, making the credits disappear.

  “So, what did you think?”

  I slip off the headphones. “It was okay,” I answer noncommittally. Then, I look at him. “What about you?”

  He slowly wraps the cord around his headphones and pauses, hands still in midair. “I thought it was total bullshit.”

  The force of his answer catches me off guard. “Why?”

  He loops the cord the last few times around and bends to tuck them into the front pocket of his bag. “There is no way a misunderstanding like that would get so blown out of proportion. All that girl had to do was tell him the truth.”

  I nod, thinking I must have missed that part because I have no idea what he is talking about.

  The girl on the other side of me disagrees. “She was just waiting for the right time.”

  “That’s bullshit,” I mutter, cringing when I realize I said that out loud.

  They both stare at me, so I shrug.

  “That’s just an excuse to put off doing something you don’t want to do.”

  She keeps going, saying something about a dog. I stop listening, and I find myself wondering how Herman is doing in his new home. Does he miss me? I know it’s a good thing that he got adopted since the idea of him being in a kennel and not being able to visit him bugs me.

  I’m still half listening to them argue when I feel my ears pop. The touch screen in front of me has an option to watch the flight path of the plane. It also shows our altitude. I work my jaw in an effort to relieve the pressure in my ears.

  “Gum?” Adam asks, holding out a piece.

  “What flavor is it?”

  “Not seafood,” he teases.

  I make a face. “That’s just gross. Come on, what kind is it?”

  He smirks. “I don’t know. It’s some kind of peppermint.”

  “Sure,” I say, plucking it from his fingers.

  “Is there a flavor you would have said no to?”

  I watch the altitude drop again on the screen. “I don’t like the cinnamon kind. Why?”

  He taps the side of his head. “Just adding it to the list.”

  “Har-har. I’m sure there are things you don’t like to eat.”

  He blinks a couple of times as he thinks about it. “I don’t like overly sweet things but”—he lifts a brow—”I can eat them if I need to.” He bumps his shoulder into mine. “It helps to be flexible when traveling.”

  I nod halfheartedly. The girl next to me uses this as an opportunity to tell Adam all the different kinds of foods she likes.

  I can’t handle it, so I put my headphones back on and find a radio station. The songs are awful, but it’s still better than talking about food. The only problem is since we’re landing soon, there are more announcements from the crew, announcements that blare full volume into the headphones on my ears. After the second one, I pull off my headphones and put them in my bag.

  Adam pauses, like he’s going to say something to me, only he doesn’t.

  When we land, the girl next to us asks what our plans are in London and how long we’ll be in town. I know she’s saying you guys, but her questions are clearly directed to Adam, not me.

  He avoids her eyes, “Just staying overnight. We’re headed to Belgium tomorrow.”

  He’s lying. We’re going to be in London for at least three days.

  I avoid looking at him. It bothers me how convincing he is when he says it. Is he scared he’ll hurt her feelings if he says he doesn’t want to see her while we’re in town? She’s just some random girl on a plane. If he could lie so easily over something so trivial, can I even trust him?

  She’s still undeterred and offers him her business card. I feel bad for her and envy her all at the same time. She’s brave, and that’s one thing I want to be.

  We are separated from her as we make our way through customs. For some reason, I’m nervous once it’s my turn to get my passport stamped. As if I’ve forgotten I’m actually an international drug smuggler, and they’re on to me. I’m also not thrilled with my passport picture. The lighting was weird at the pharmacy where I had it taken. I look even paler than normal, and my hair wasn’t cooperating that day. When the officer does a double take, I can only hope it’s because I don’t look that bad in real life.

  While we wait for the baggage claim carousel to spring to life, I look around for the girl who sat next to me.

  When I don’t see her, I turn to Adam. “Why did you lie to that girl?”

  “What?”

  I glance around for her again. “You know, that girl who was sitting next to me. Why did you tell her we are leaving tomorrow?”

  He shrugged. “I had a feeling she wouldn’t take the hint. If she had known we were going to be here for a couple of days, I think she’d want to meet up.”

  “Why didn’t you just tell her you weren’t interested?” I ask, inching closer to the belt.

  His movements mirror mine. “You don’t think that would have been harsh?”

  I look at my feet. “I don’t think lying was any better.”

  I watch as he shuffles his feet.

  “I don’t see the point in hurting the feelings of some girl I’m never going to see again.”

  I don’t even know why it’s bugging me as much as it is. I understand what he’s saying. I just don’t like that he did it.

  We both jump when a hand clamps down on Adam’s shoulder. When he turns, his face breaks into a wide grin. I stand there while Adam hugs and greets some guy.

  “Abe, this is Aubrey.”

  I put my hand out, but instead, I’m also pulled into a hug. Abe is so tall that it feels like my face is pressed against his stomach. The wool of his blue sweater itches my cheek.

  Once I’m released, we stand together and watch the parade of luggage before us. Adam’s bag comes first, and mine is not too far behind. Abe pulls my bag for me, and I trail after them to the exit.

  Abe has quite a stride, given his long limbs. I fear falling behind, like I did in New York. Instead, I can tell Adam is walking slower than before, causing Abe to slow down as well. I listen to their conversation as we make our way to Abe’s car. Or his mother’s car. Or his mother’s sister’s car. Something like that. He borrowed it from someone to come to collect us.

  It’s fun to watch Abe fold himself into such a small car. He has the driver’s seat pushed all the way back, but his knees still come up a bit on either side of the steering wheel.

  It’s not until we’re on the road that it strikes me that I’m in another country. The sensation of driving on the other side of the road is odd, especially during right turns. It just doesn’t feel right.

  Abe is also a fairly aggressive driver. He gets right on the bumper of the car in front of us and has no issue using his horn to make his presence known.

  Abe shares a place with another roommate, who is on holiday. There is, it turns out, some confusion on Abe’s part as to my relationship with Adam. He assumes we’ll just share his mate’s bed.

  Adam glances back at me while Abe parks. “Don’t worry. Aubrey likes lumpy couches.”

  I discreetly look out the window to avoid his gray gaze. I think back to last night, how the thought of sleeping in his bed affected me. To now be in a car with one of his friends who thought we were a couple. The idea d
oes funny things to my stomach, or maybe it’s just my reaction to the car no longer moving.

  Adam holds the front seat down while I hoist myself out of the bucket-style backseat. I ease myself past him, purposely avoiding touching him.

  While Adam’s place is a minimalist’s dream, Abe’s apartment is a stale cigarette–smelling, cluttered mess. I take one look at the stained couch and glance at Adam. His mouth twitches like he wants to laugh.

  How can he think this is funny? Shouldn’t he be breaking out in hives just from being here?

  Our bags are both in the main room. I’m trying to figure out how to claim the bedroom when Abe asks if I’m hungry.

  I nod. “I can eat.”

  Adam walks past me to look at something on a bookshelf. “Fish and chips?”

  “Okay—” Abe starts.

  Adam stops him. “Aubrey, will you eat fish and chips?”

  Asshole. I give him the same answer as the night before. “Sure, just hold the fish.”

  I walk over to my bag and tilt my head toward Abe. “Which room is your roommate’s?”

  He gestures past me. I snap the handle up and walk into the room, closing the door behind me. I’m sure that doesn’t make me a great guest, but Adam is annoying, and I need a moment to myself.

  Abe’s roommate’s room turns out to be cleaner than the other parts of the apartment I have seen. The bed is made. I pull the sheets back and sniff them, exhaling with relief that they smell fresh. I flop down onto the bed, careful to let my feet hang off the edge.

  I turn my head toward the door when I hear a knock. “Come in.”

  It’s Adam. He opens the door and leans against the frame. “Are you mad?”

  I hear my dad’s voice in my head, and his words come out of my mouth. “People don’t get mad. Animals do.”

  “So, if you aren’t mad, what are you?” He smirks.

  I deliberately turn my face away from him. “Are you going to make fun of me about what I eat everywhere we go?

  I hear the door close and then his footsteps as he moves closer to the bed. I flip over when I feel the mattress accommodate his weight as he sits on the edge of the bed. His back is to me.