The Lion of Ackbarr

by Erme Lander

  “I can’t.”

  Lissina’s eyes flashed, “Fine, I’ll find someone else then.” She flounced off, pulling Jenna with her. Jenna shrugged at Mika and followed, to the unhelpful cat-calls of the other boys. Mika shrugged off their invites for the park as she left.

  The night of the festival, tiny lights were tucked into crevices of the buildings, giving the look of the starlit sky coming down to rest in the city. From above the walls, the real stars glittered sharp and cold. Mika had never seen anything like it. Couples walked around the markets in masks, small children dashing about underfoot. Ezra dressed up and Mika came out in her skirts to meet him. They laughed together, him buying spiced wine that went to her head nearly as much as the warm kisses he gave her in the cold air.

  She slipped in through Marta’s door, shutting it quietly. Her head was still a little muzzy from the wine she’d drunk. The room was warm after the chill outside and she could hear a bustle beyond in the main house. Still unsure as to what ceremonies went on at this time of year, she dressed quickly back into her boy’s clothes.

  The lamps were on full as she went into the hall. A number of guards stood around that she didn’t recognise, servants moving amongst them. Despite the decorations it didn’t seem festive here. People looked worried, talking quietly.

  Marta caught her, “Go to the private examination room, knock first. Lin wants you now.”

  Confused, she ran down the corridor. The door opened and she found a couple sitting and waiting with tense faces. She recognised Lissina’s father, his solemnity now stone-faced. Her mother she’d rarely seen. She could see the resemblance, small, with delicate hands and feet, the same soft curly dark hair.

  “Lissina?”

  Belindros came through the curtained alcove, “In here.”

  She walked in, heart in her throat, without knowing why. Lissina lay on the couch. Blood was everywhere, scrapes on her face, hands huddled into herself, clutching the blanket covering her. Her eyes looked dazed until they focused on Mika and she moaned, turning away, trying to hide in the back of the couch.

  Belindros turned Mika around and took her back into the corridor. “Do you know anything about this?”

  Speechless, she shook her head, “I’ve been with a friend, I’ve only just got back.” His face was stony. “Marta can vouch for me, she knows everything.” Her heart sank further, she was going to have to tell him she was a girl. “What happened?”

  “She won’t say. I have my suspicions.” He continued, “Have you been anywhere near the park tonight?” She shook her head, Ezra had walked them around the main lit areas, then dragged her back to his rooms for a celebration of their own.

  “She was found wandering around there. Her father brought her here a short while ago.” He watched her carefully. “She has been violated in a way that could implicate only one person. I need to know where you’ve been before I make the accusation.” Mika opened her mouth to reply when a shout from the room interrupted them. Belindros turned to go back in and she was left feeling helpless.

  She slowly walked back to her rooms. Jon had disturbed at her step outside his room, only to be snapped at to go back to sleep. He did with the natural ability of a street child or small animal, if the trouble didn’t concern him then it could wait. Mika sat, head in her hands. Jace had raped Lissina. He’d done it while she’d been with Ezra. Why hadn’t she gone with Lissina? She could have met with Ezra later, he would have waited. Deep down she knew it was because she’d got impatient with Lissina’s childish crush on her. This was her fault.

  Unable to stand being on her own, she went down to the kitchen. She sat in the quiet bustle, nursing a hot drink and stared into the fire. Belindros called her into his study. He looked old as he sat behind his desk.

  “Well?”

  “She fancied me. When I didn’t show all the interest she wanted, she decided to go after someone like me. I tried to warn her off, she thought I was jealous.” Her voice was flat.

  He nodded grimly, “And you are full-blooded Cassai.”

  “Yes.”

  “One of the royal family?”

  “My mother is. My father is related, but not as close.”

  “I guessed as much. Can you change?”

  “Yes.” She barely breathed it.

  “Jace knows.”

  “I think he’s guessed.”

  Belindros shifted impatiently, “Why do you think I’ve been trying to keep you away from him boy? Why I didn’t mind you bleaching your hair to look like a full blood. What I can’t understand is why he went after her. He normally goes for blondes.” He rubbed tired eyes. “Just to make sure we get this right, who are your parents?”

  “My father is Koren, the Cassai ambassador. My mother is Ayanna, she’s the member of the royal family.”

  His fingers became still and he snapped back, “I know who she is, Kaylan.” He nodded as she gaped at the use of her brother’s name. “I guessed who you might be when I found you wandering in Fenin. Your father met me after you went missing, asked me to keep an eye out for you. He was desperate. He couldn’t spend any more time looking and people were starting to ask questions. I’ve spent all this fucking time trying to keep you out of trouble and you go looking for it.”

  Mika gulped, “I’m not Kaylan.” It was the hardest thing she’d ever said, “I’m his sister, Mika.”

  The blood drained out of his face. Every wrinkle showed and for the first time he actually looked his age. “My god.” He dropped his face into his hands, there was a long silence between them. Mika sat waiting, there wasn’t anything else to say.

  He shifted to prop his head up on his elbow, all vitality drained out of him, “That poor girl, when you met him for the first time, she was with you.”

  “Yes.”

  “And you met him at other points when she was around.”

  “Yes.” She could hardly breathe.

  “How often?”

  “Over several months.” She tried to think through the tiredness, “It must have been every few weeks, maybe more often, I can’t remember exactly.”

  “She was with you every time?”

  “Most times. We were in the same class. Her father liked me to escort her to the palace to see her cousins.”

  “He smelt you. He assumed it was her.” They locked eyes. Mika went cold, remembering the looks of confusion.

  “He thought I was a boy.”

  “It’s the only thing that saved you. He thought you were a rival. No, not a rival. He knew he could beat you at any point. He was playing with you, trying to get you to react. This was deliberate, he wants you to try something.” His face firmed, “We have to get you out of here.”

  “No. My studies. Jon...”

  “Jon can go with you. I’ll find somewhere, use an excuse. If we are lucky, he will think you’ve run from him.”

  “No.”

  “Don’t you understand?” His fist thumped the desk, “You’ve got no cover now. If he finds out you’re a girl...” He trailed off and re-started, “The King has always wanted an army of killers. That’s why he tolerates Jace, no other reason. If either of them finds out that you are a girl, then you are dead or as good as.”

  Mika hadn’t thought she could become colder, she began to shake. Rape, what she’d had with Rylan would be nothing compared with Jace. She remembered the tugging between them. He’d want to control her. A sickness spread through her stomach. She nodded.

  “Tonight. Get your things together. If we are lucky then Jace will think you’ve run. We can’t risk him realising what you are. Wake Gavin and send him to me.”

  Chapter 20

  Gavin seemed to be able to go from sleeping to full alertness in a second. He strode over to Belindros’ study, still pulling on his shirt. At any other point Mika would have been attempting not to watch the muscles moving under the smooth skin. This evening she couldn’t care, Gavin could have been walking around naked and she wouldn’t have noticed. She woke Jon, told
him to pack and sat on her bed, trying to work out what she needed.

  Marta came up, found her staring at the wall and helped her pack. Her quiet murmurs helped to reassure Mika. The shock hadn’t set in fully yet, everything felt unreal as Marta quizzed her on what she’d need, folded clothes and tucked other items into a set of saddlebags.

  “Lissina is sleeping,” Marta said. “It’s the best healer at the moment.” She shook her head, “All Lin can do is to keep washing her out and hope nothing goes septic inside. He hates to feel helpless like this.” Mika winced.

  They went downstairs, collecting Jon on the way. Belindros was outside waiting for them. Gavin had prepared the horses and a pony for Jon who was yawning.

  Belindros hugged her unexpectedly, holding her for a long time. He cupped her face in his hands and said gruffly, “Best damned apprentice I’ve had and what do I find? He’s a girl. I knew you were too good to be true.” She wobbled a smile in return. “I’ve told Gavin. He knows where to take you, there aren’t many places where Jace can’t go. I’ll get you out of the gates.”

  They led the horses down. Belindros perched on a horse led by Gavin, wrapped up against the cold. The festive decorations were limp in Mika’s eyes and her breath caught as she realised she’d not said goodbye to Ezra. No time, he’d want to come as well and he couldn’t. He was too well known, they’d find her through him. Tears slid quietly down her face, remembering their warm sleepy argument as she insisted she leave their bed to go home. How he’d grumbled at her sliding out of his arms and got dressed to walk her through the iron frost. The way he’d kissed her, open mouthed and leant against the wall to watch her go inside. He’d find Marta, would ask where she’d gone. Fear grew as she wondered what he’d do when he found out.

  They’d reached the gates. Belindros slid down with Gavin’s help and spoke quietly with the guards. A few murmured words and the gates opened, they mounted on the other side. A note of finality as the gates shut behind them, the docks spreading out below. No longer a place of sanctuary, a wish she’d had when she’d first arrived.

  They trotted their horses, warming them up. The moons were bright, not set behind the mountains. A lightness on the horizon showed where morning would come. Mika thought of Lissina lying on the bed. Pale and still, the whimper when she’d seen Mika still made her heart turn over. The frost lay white over everything, steam poured from the nostrils of the horses. A crisp cold night, turning into morning, sparklingly beautiful. A sense of injustice, it shouldn’t be like this, not today. She was sharply reminded of the day she’d been told about her brother. The world kept turning, whatever happened, without caring.

  As the sun rose, Gavin urged them into a canter. Jon clung on grimly, he’d never learnt to ride, had only sat on the pony in the yard. Mika felt her muscles stretch with the unaccustomed exercise. She’d ache tomorrow, but Jon was having problems. Several times she caught him as he slid. Eventually she sat him behind her, put her saddlebags onto his pony and led it.

  At some point in the early morning, she slid from her horse and threw up on the side of the road. Jon perched uncomfortably and managed to hold on, no more. Gavin dismounted to hold her head, uttering soothing comments about shock. He got a tiny fire going to make a warm drink, saying they could all do with something. The sickness subsided and she was left feeling hollow again.

  They rode for a couple of days. Mika threw up each morning, regular as clockwork, until she could no longer deny she was pregnant. Gavin said nothing, she was sure he’d realised her condition, he wasn’t stupid. He simply kept her eating and drinking, offering sympathy when needed.

  Mika spent the time riding deep in thought. Jace would come after her, he must have realised what he’d smelt wasn’t Lissina. He’d tried to get her to react as a boy, she wouldn’t be safe anywhere as a girl. Gavin wouldn’t say where they were going. Jace was attached to the King, where could she be safe?

  Jace. That cat he held with him, there was something about it that troubled her. The cat had been rampaging the countryside she’d been told. Belindros had thought she was her brother. Her thoughts spun round until she went cold and swore to herself for not seeing it before. If she changed into a cat, then why not her brother? Kaylan had shamed her parents by turning into an animal and by not being able to control himself. She wondered what they would think of her and shook her head, not wanting to think about it.

  Belindros had said Jace could control others. Kaylan was being kept in that shape, forced to do Jace’s bidding. Her resolve hardened, she had to go back and get him free of Jace. Maybe she could help him control himself. She remembered seeing the other cats in the cage. She shivered and noticing Gavin’s eyes on her, tried to keep her face neutral.

  Mika offered to take the last watch that evening. She slept dreamlessly in her blankets until Gavin shook her with a big hand, then sat, wrapped up next to the remains of the fire. The night was sparkling cold as she watched the moons over the hills. The breathing of the other two became regular.

  She rose and spoke quietly to her horse. Gavin’s black gelding, pushed himself close, wanting attention too. He snorted as she shoved his nose away. After several days riding, he was still eager to go. She saddled her horse, wincing at every jingle and stamp of the horse’s feet.

  “What’s up?”

  “Nothing. Won’t be long.” She should have known Gavin would disturb at a sound.

  Jon was curled in a ball leaning against Gavin, his breathing long and slow. Gavin couldn’t move without waking Jon. He sighed and settled back down, grunting, “Be careful. If you’re not back soon, then I’ll come looking for you.”

  “Yes.” She had no intention of coming back. She turned her horse towards Ackbarr and rode.

  Mika came through the gates just before they closed. Her horse was tired and she slid off to lead it towards Ezra’s place instead of home. He’d be worrying over her disappearance. She wondered if he’d gone to find Marta. She missed him with a sharp ache, needed the feel of his arms around her, to see the lazy look in his eyes and his fingers fiddling with the strings on his gitern.

  She tied the horse up and climbed the stairs to his room. Waved away his neighbours asking if she’d seen Ezra. She unlocked the door. Everything was quiet inside, then an iron smell hit her nostrils and she cried out. Brown stains ran down the walls, the same nightmare she remembered from Fenin. Blood everywhere. She staggered back against the door frame. Only the cold weather had stopped it smelling further. Someone called from the stairs having heard her cry.

  People talking, a friend of Ezra’s pushing past her to get into the room. They took her downstairs. Further shouting and questions as more people found out. Ezra had been popular. A cup of something strong was pushed into her hand and she drank without thinking.

  Mika watched the hustle around her with a growing anger, a coldness that made the hurt dim, locking it inside her. Only one person could have done this. He’d seen her dressed as a boy with Ezra in the park, clowning around, pretending to be mates. He was targeting the people around her that he could hurt. Belindros and his household were safe. The other Medici apprentices and the nobles were safe. He’d isolated Lissina, how long before he found Jon?

  She stood, ignoring the people pulling at her and left. Mika walked her horse home and tied it up in a silent dream. Images floated through her mind. Nothing had been left in Ezra’s rooms in one piece. Blood everywhere. His gitern smashed, clothes shredded. He’d put up a fight, despite being a musician and not a swordsman. Mika hoped he’d hurt Jace somehow. Part of her brain was screaming that Jace meant her to confront him.

  Mika slid into the house. It was quiet. Belindros was normally out at this point in the day, Marta in her rooms. A few servants looked her way curiously and she waved at them, hoping that they wouldn’t know why she’d left or ask why she was back.

  She looked in the dispensary. The list for Jace’s drugs was there, she mixed them carefully and placed them in the boxes used. It was ne
arly the right time to deliver them, she could say Jace needed another supply, she was known well enough at the palace now for the excuse to be accepted. She watched herself adding a fatal ingredient to the mix, not caring about the consequences of her actions. Ezra was dead. Nothing else mattered.

  There was a guard on Jace’s rooms. After a brief hesitation she walked up and announced she had something for Jace. The guard looked at the box, recognised Belindros’ seal and waved her into the antechamber to Jace’s rooms without a comment. Jace opened the door to her knock. He was unshaven, bags under his eyes as though he’d not slept. His hand trembled on the door frame.

  The guard blanched at the sight of Jace, “You are to remain in your rooms.” He flushed as his voice cracked. She felt sorry for him, he wasn’t much older than her.

  Jace’s mouth opened, she saw the sharp inhalation and his gaze swung to fix on her. He knew what she was. As if with great effort, he pulled back the door and inclined his head to invite her in. The courtly gesture contrasting with his rumpled appearance.

  As though in a dream she stepped through. The rooms inside were dark and musty, not fit to be an animal lair. No sane animal would live in a pit like this. He slammed the door shut behind them and leant against the wall, arms folded.

  “I’ve brought your drugs.” He ignored her. She held the box towards him and he slapped it out of her hand.

  He was staring at her intently, lips drawn back slightly, drawing her scent into him. “You aren’t a boy.” It was the first time he’d addressed her. Jace shifted to one side and she moved away, too late she realised he’d blocked the door. He smirked, seeing her dismay.