Krush

by Ashlynn Pearce

  “Mom and Dad are going, so I offered to stay and watch the bar. Honestly, I would have made up any excuse not to go. Not really into that mushy shit.”

  “You don’t like soft music and candles? Or don’t like the idea of Thrand getting married.”

  “What? No, Ethan’s getting married, not Thrand. Not that I really care.” She snorted and gave him a look. “And no. Soft music and candles are out.”

  He pulled her closer, one hand on her hip, the other around the back of her neck. His thumb tipped her head up so he could look into her eyes. They dilated and her breath stalled.

  “I’ll keep that in mind.”

  “You do that.”

  “So what is it you do like?”

  She licked her lips and her hand fisted his shirt. “You already know.”

  “Do I?”

  She pressed her lips near his ear. “Truth. I like your control. And I like it more when your control breaks.”

  “Truth. I’ve never lost control before, but I don’t have any where you’re concerned.” He squeezed her hip and her sexy laugh made him grit his teeth.

  “Nice to know,” she purred against his skin.

  He angled his head so his lips skimmed her cheek. “And right now you’re about to snap my control.”

  Cole woke with a start and jerked up. Relief swept through him when he saw her beside him. She slept on her stomach, her arms curled beneath her, and her face turned away from him. He propped himself up on an elbow and tugged down the blankets. Perfect, pale skin spread out before him. The large tattoo on her shoulder stared up at him. It was a cross between a pin up and a day-of-the-dead girl’s face. Done in gray, purple, and green, her purple eyes with the long lashes seemed to bore into him. What he found most interesting was a hole in her forehead in the shape of a heart with a green butterfly fluttering out. Knowing Angel, it meant something.

  He pushed up her cropped hair and placed a kiss at the base of neck. She sighed, but didn’t move. He resisted the urge to press up against her. They’d gotten very little sleep last night. He was insatiable where she was concerned. The more he tasted, the more he wanted. He slid out of bed, took a quick shower, pulled on loose shorts and went to start some coffee. He poured a cup and walked out onto his spacious balcony. They were docked in Ft. Lauderdale today, but this side of the ship didn’t face the shore. All he saw was an endless stretch of blue.

  The reasons he shouldn’t let her in were long and numerous. But he was tired of hiding. Tired of running from the truth. The big fat ugly truth that he hadn’t revealed to Angel last night. He hadn’t lied, but he’d held back that last bit of info. He’d kept the secret for over two years—it wasn’t an easy thing to let go of.

  About an hour later, he heard her get up, so he called room service then went back on the deck and faced the open glass sliding door into his room. Would she take off again?

  She walked into his view and his breath caught. She wore the black shirt he had worn under his button down the previous night. It hung loose on her and grazed her knees. She paused directly in his line of sight before she spotted him and walked his way.

  Air rushed out of his lungs in relief. She was staying.

  Her eyes widened when she glanced around his balcony. “Holy shit. You could have a party out here. There’s even a hot tub.”

  “I’m not much into parties.”

  Her gaze swung back to him, and he stepped forward to tilt her face up. It was free from any trace of makeup, and he was taken in.

  A quizzical look came over her face. “What?”

  “You don’t have any makeup on.” Entranced, he traced her cheek.

  “Uh, is that bad?” She tried to back up, but he snaked an arm around her waist.

  “I’ve never seen a woman without makeup. Ever.”

  *

  Angel drowned in his eyes. In the way he looked at her. Like she was the most important thing he’d ever seen. Her stomach flipped. Her palms were damp and she didn’t really understand his reaction. It didn’t help that he was sexy as sin in nothing but those loose shorts. His chiseled body was a feast for the eyes.

  “Not even your mom? Or your wife?”

  He shook his head and pulled her between his legs as he leaned his back against the railing. “Nor my sisters. All the women in my life pride themselves on their looks. That means a perfect face.”

  She narrowed her gaze not sure if he was complimenting her or not. “What am I missing here?”

  “You’re real. So real.” His thumbs grazed along her cheeks, across her lips. “You look so young. Please tell me you’re legal.”

  She rolled her eyes. She knew she looked young, especially with no make-up on. “Yes. I’m twenty-five, but—”

  “I’m thirty-two,” he mumbled absently. “I’m not sure I would care how old you were at this point.”

  His teeth scraped along her lower lip then his hands cupped her ass and picked her up, forcing her to lock her legs around his waist. He carried her through the doors, placed her on the countertop, and stepped closer between her legs.

  Thought came to a screeching halt as he angled her hips, tangled his other hand in her hair, and tugged her head back. His lips skimmed along her neck. Pinned, all she could do was grip his arms while he took his sweet time. Slow and deliberate. Her body wasn’t hers anymore, yet she dug her heels into his ass, wanting him closer.

  “You are the most real person I’ve ever met in my life.” His words were nothing but air over her skin. “And I’m not sure I’ll ever get enough of you.”

  He bit at her neck, and her hands shot into his hair. Her heart pounded out of her chest. His words and body took her piece-by-piece. By the time this cruise was over, would there be any part of her he hadn’t taken?

  A knock at the door had him growling against her skin. He lifted his head, his eyes glazed with passion and something deeper. Something that made her insides freeze.

  “That would be our breakfast.” He brushed his lips against her ear. “Don’t move.”

  She sucked in her lip as he walked toward the door. His back was perfect except for the long red scratches on his skin from her nails. She couldn’t stop the heat that hit her face as a tray was rolled in.

  The man in uniform stalled as he stared at her, which only made her blush worse. She couldn’t imagine what she looked like, perched on the counter with nothing but Cole’s shirt on.

  Cole cleared his throat. “I understand the lure, but eyes on me, man.”

  The guy’s face turned beet red and he mumbled an apology. Cole tipped him before he left.

  The intense look he’d been giving her was gone, or at the very least, hidden, but she couldn’t get it out of her head. Soon he was right back where he’d been before the interruption. Standing between her legs. She shoved a shaky hand through her hair.

  He grabbed it and laced his with hers. “What is it?”

  She shook her head. She couldn’t name it because she didn’t even know. His fingers grazed her face and tipped her chin up.

  “Nothing,” she said finally.

  “Lie.”

  She tried to slide off the counter, but he trapped her with his body.

  “We said no walls. So what is it?”

  She took a deep breath, sat up straight and looked him in the eye. “Everything is progressing so fast. I don’t do dates, I don’t do relationships, and now it feels like I’m doing both. You tell me what this is. I don’t even know you—”

  “Stop. I know you think because it’s only been a few days you don’t know me, but you do. You know me better than some who have known me my whole life.” He stepped back and tugged at her hand. “Come here, I want to show you something.”

  Chapter Seven

  Curious to what he was up to, she let him lead her to an L-shaped desk where he turned on his laptop. He sat and pulled her into his lap. When the screen came on, she saw one of the most beautiful homes she’d ever seen. It was huge, with a circle drive, and tall
pines surrounding it. It looked like an oversized and elegant log cabin. She looked over at him and noticed he watched her not the screen.

  “That’s my home. I designed and built it.” He turned his attention to the screen and pushed a button to show another view. “There’s a pond behind it.”

  “You love it.” She could tell by the tone of his voice his home meant a lot to him.

  He nodded. “I do. But mostly, I love the workshop I built out behind it.” Another picture of a smaller version of the big house. “I build furniture as a hobby and this is where I spend every moment I can.”

  He flicked through photo after photo of his workshop, which was really a mini-house, complete with kitchen and living room. But what amazed her was the handcrafted furniture he built. Ornate hutches, handmade toys, and even a door with an elaborate carving in the middle, all done by him.

  She picked up his hand. “It’s why you have callouses.”

  “Yes. I also help build some of the houses I design. This is the house I’m currently working on.” He clicked on a floor plan and pointed out what each room was. Before long, she understood the drawing.

  “It’s huge.”

  “About twelve thousand square feet.”

  Her jaw dropped and she turned to him. “That’s insane. Who would need a home that big unless you had fifteen people living with you?”

  He smiled and kissed the side of her neck. “I’m not sure. My home is nine thousand and it was just two people.”

  She blinked at him. “That doesn’t even make sense. I live in an eight hundred square foot loft where everything is in one room except the bathroom. And it’s plenty.”

  He cupped the back of her neck and spoke softly into her ear. “Yet another thing that makes you so real.”

  He started clicking through pictures of his family. Naming each one and talking about them. “This is Casey, the oldest. She is thirty-eight and has three kids. Mitchell is thirty-four. He’s the player of the family. Luke is twenty-eight and has four kids. And finally, the troublemakers. Adam and Amelia, the twins, are twenty-three. My parents are Leo and Josetta.”

  His low voice tickled her ear, drawing her into his world. Almost everyone was smiling or laughing, and it was clear where Cole had gotten his exotic looks. His mother was beautiful, with thick dark hair and the eyes that Cole had inherited. His father was a big man with blond hair and striking green eyes. Half his siblings looked like their mother, and the other half took after their dad.

  “Do all of them live in Denver?”

  “No. Just the twins and I. The rest are scattered all over the globe. But family is extremely important to my mother and they love to travel. We always pick a place to meet for holidays.”

  He continued to click through photos. So many of all of them together. For Christmas, Thanksgiving, birthdays, vacations. Cole pointed out and named everyone except for one tall blond woman. That had to be his deceased wife.

  “My father was in Brazil on business when he met my mother. She loves to tell the story of their whirlwind courtship. Her family used to hate my dad because he took her away from them, but they have long gotten over it. Or at least tolerate it. Dad bought a home there so they can go back whenever they want.”

  At some point, he moved the food to his desk, and they ate while they relaxed and he talked. His hand brushed back and forth on her neck. The love for his family was evident with each story he told.

  “You don’t play fair, you know,” she said as she absorbed his intent.

  “I don’t want you to ever say you don’t know me. Ever again.”

  He stared into her face, and her body shivered. Her heart expanded and she took a deep breath. There was so much going on behind his eyes. A question hung there but he wouldn’t ask.

  He cupped her face. “No walls, Anjo.”

  She managed a nod. Seven more days of Cole and his caramel eyes.

  The next several days flew by in a blur. They visited each isle, Half Moon Cay, again, Ocho Rios, and Georgetown. They hit all the shops on the boat. They did the zip line and attended the theater. He didn’t let her dwell on anything, kept her laughing, and owned her body every night. She told him about her family and showed him pictures on her phone.

  They didn’t talk about the future, only focusing on the here and now. But the more wrapped up she got in him, the louder the clock ticked. Every day the noose tightened around her neck. What happened when the cruise was over?

  Day twelve was spent at sea. She was almost frantic, but hoped she managed to hide it. She didn’t want to be the first to bring it up. She’d gotten so used to sleeping next to his large, warm frame, she didn’t know how she’d ever sleep alone again. Or more to the point, she didn’t know how she would sleep without him.

  She sat on the couch, drawing in her notepad, and he was at the desk, working on his latest floor plan and answering emails for his business. Except she couldn’t concentrate, her gaze kept straying back to him. Those large hands, those too full lips, and his hair that always had that mussed, sexy look. And of course he wore nothing but shorts. So distracting to her senses. It didn’t matter that she knew every line of muscle by heart. She chewed on the end of her pencil while she studied him.

  “I have a dinner with business associates tomorrow night. Come with me,” he said as he got up out of his chair and knelt down in front of her. He took the pad and pencil out of her hands and pushed her back so his mouth skimmed along her stomach.

  She clenched her hands in his hair and gave him what they both wanted. She never answered him, but she didn’t have to. The countdown clock was too loud, and she planned to spend every moment she could with him.

  The next evening, she got ready in her room. She wanted to surprise him. She could only guess the type of people he worked with, but she bet sophisticated would be a good description. So her makeup was subdued, but there. Her lips shiny, but not red, and her little black dress matched her black heels. She turned and looked in the mirror over her shoulder. Makeup hid the tattoo on her shoulder.

  She met him at his door.

  He smiled, placed a kiss just under her ear, and they went to Vortex Lounge, which was reserved for guests in the Grand Suites only. It was located on the same deck as his room. As soon as they stepped inside, she wanted to turn right back around and leave. It didn’t help when Cole frowned and touched her shoulder where her tattoo was hidden. Luckily, he didn’t say anything.

  The people standing around looked as haughty as the tailored clothes they wore. The hostess sniffed at her, but smiled at Cole as they were led a group of five other individuals. Introductions were made and they sat. She tried to keep her stomach from cramping, but it was obvious she wasn’t welcome. The women glared, the men stripped her, and even though Cole’s arm was draped over the back of her chair, they never let up. Not a one of them tried to include her in the conversation.

  Cole knew them by name and talked with them easily. She figured out he’d known these people for years. Especially the couple he was designing the house for.

  She did not fit.

  She excused herself to go to the restroom, any reason to gather her wits. Her heart squeezed painfully as reality sunk in. They hadn’t said a word about a future past this cruise, and now she knew why. She looked up into the mirror, wiped away a stray tear and squared her shoulders. She had hoped for a fling, but she’d gotten way more.

  She stepped out of the restroom and Cole was waiting for her, fury marking his features.

  “We are leaving,” he said and led her out of the restaurant and to his room. Once there, he paced back and forth, his hands laced behind his neck.

  She crossed her arms over her stomach and waited for it. She knew what was coming. Fighting tears and nausea, she closed her eyes.

  “Why did you cover your tattoo?”

  She jerked her head in surprise. That wasn’t what she expected to hear. “I guessed what type of people would be there.”

  He strode over to her an
d dragged her to the bathroom. With a wet towel and none too easy scrubbing, he washed away the makeup. She stared at his hard face in the mirror and said nothing.

  “Never hide who you are.” His tortured eyes met hers in the mirror.

  “Cole, did they say something?”

  He dropped the wet rag and hastily left the room. She turned to follow him.

  “Ted said I shouldn’t bring a dalliance to a business meeting. He said he saw the attraction, but you were no Melanie.”

  And there it was.

  She stumbled back against the wall. Air strangled her. She squeezed her eyes shut. She couldn’t watch him say the words. Fuck, what was wrong with her? She should get mad. Storm at him, but it was all she could do to stay on her feet.

  “I told him he was right. You weren’t Melanie… you’re better.”

  Her eyes popped open in shock. He was pacing again, not looking at her. Pain etched his face and his breath came in harsh puffs.

  “There is something I haven’t told you.” He dropped his hands limply to his sides and looked up. “Melanie was pregnant when she died in the car crash.”

  That wave of information crushed her and she sagged against the wall. He swallowed and rubbed his palms on the dress slacks that draped his hips so well.

  “But there is more. Something I’ve never told anyone. Not even my family.” He glanced at the ceiling like he was looking for guidance, then back at her. “The baby wasn’t mine.”

  Her mouth dropped open.

  “We had been having problems. Hadn’t been intimate in a long time. Then she told me she was pregnant. I had no clue she was cheating on me until that moment. She begged me to let her tell everyone. I was so overwhelmed, we’d known each other so long, I agreed. She packed up her stuff, was going to move into his home. But she kept putting off telling everyone.”

  His hands shook and she desperately wanted to go to him. His wife died two years ago. He’d kept this locked up for all that time… only to open up to her. She couldn’t even grasp it.