Blood Bath, A Paranormal/Urban Fantasy (The Maurin Kincaide Series Book 4)
Page 18
Or I could stay in Mason's room where I might give in to other needs. I'd been drawn to him from the moment I met him. I wanted him and I knew he wanted me but it would only complicate my life more than it already was. And right now my life felt pretty complicated.
Mason chuckled when he saw the panic stricken look on my face. "You've already spent the night in my bed. More than one night in fact and I have yet to take advantage of you. Well, I may have pressed the advantage a little. I'll sleep on the floor by the fire or out here on the couch like I have every night you've been under my roof. I'm going to speak with your father. He'll want to know what happened tonight."
"Maybe I should come with you." My stomach growled in objection.
"Maybe you should feed the monster that has taken up residence inside your stomach. I'll only be gone a couple of hours." He cupped my face in his hands before pressing a kiss to my forehead. "Besides we can't drive to your father's and it's still not safe for you in the between."
I watched Mason wrap himself in the between and jump to wherever it was my father actually lived. I had yet to see the place for myself. I was on my way to the kitchen when Ryanne called after me.
"Go grab your shower. I'll take Aidan some fresh bandages and bring you something to eat. After cleaning this mess up I don't feel like cleaning another one in my kitchen." She gave me a little wink and shoved the blood soaked towels into a basket. She set the bowl of bloody water on top of the basket and headed toward the laundry room across the hall from the training room.
I ripped the Flogging Molly shirt over my head and dropped it in the tub. The jeans didn't come off as easily. They were soaked with blood so I had to sort of roll them down my legs before they joined my shirt. I was tired of tossing my clothes. Maybe Ryanne had a trick for getting blood stains out. At some point in the night the strap on my bra broke so I tossed it in the trash with my socks.
I stepped out of my underwear and into the shower, hissing when the hot water hit my skin. Normally I liked the water set to melt your skin off but the little scratches and cuts I didn't notice until after the water hit them had me dialing back the temperature.
Once all the blood and grime had rinsed away I opened the shower door to grab the sugar cookie scrub Aidan packed for me. As soon as I had the gritty scrub in my hand I changed my mind. I might as well wash my cuts with sand paper. There was a new bar of soap in the shower caddy. Certain Mason wouldn't mind I lathered up with the soap. The steam filled the shower stall with spearmint, citrus, lavender and something else I couldn't place. It was spicy, smoky. It smelled like Mason.
Afraid mere thoughts of him while I was naked in the shower would conjure him, I tried to scrub the images of him from my mind as I shampooed my hair. It was damn near impossible since his scent still filled the shower. I rinsed my hair. The water sluicing down my body, rinsing the bubbles away and with it some of my tension. My stomach rumbled again, reminding me I hadn't been paying nearly enough attention to it but it would have to wait until after I conditioned. Otherwise it would be hell getting a brush through my hair.
Turning the water to cold I rinsed my hair, careful to leave a little of the conditioner behind and got out. I threw my hair up in a turban using one of the fluffy terry towels and wrapped another around my body.
After digging in my bag until I found a pair of yoga pants and my Beastie Boys tee shirt, I quickly threw them on and went into the bedroom hoping to find a dinner tray. I wasn't used to having someone bring me food. I was far from spoiled despite my adoptive parents being filthy rich, but I admit to being a little disappointed when there wasn't anything waiting for me. Perfectly capable of fending for myself however, I decided to head to the kitchen. Poor Saint Ryanne had probably fallen asleep on a stack of clothes before she could get out of the laundry room.
I was on my way to the kitchen when I stopped in front of the door to Aidan's room. I should check on him, make sure he had enough of the synthetic blood to at least heal himself. He wouldn't feel a hundred percent without fresh blood but with enough synthetic he wouldn't have a huge wound in his side. If Ryanne passed out before she made it to the kitchen she probably hadn't checked his bandage. He should be healed beyond the point of bleeding but I wanted to clean the incision for him before he went down for the day.
Guilt over my torn feelings for Aidan and Mason, not to mention my inability to give him my blood, the one thing he needed most tonight, had me hesitating. My hand was on the door knob but I couldn't seem to turn it. Would he want to see me after I had basically rejected him in front of Mason and Ryanne. I had to at least explain why. He deserved that much, even if he didn't want to hear it.
And I deserved the apology I knew he wanted to give. I just needed to let him. He knew I cared about him, not whether or not he was a vampire. What he didn't understand was why I would rather die than be one. We needed to have a talk about my fae blood and whether or not our relationship could survive it, whether or not we could survive each other.
A noise on the other side of the door sent me flying into the room. If Aidan was in pain none of that mattered. I would figure out a way around the feeding, figure out a way to make him better without giving him my blood. Only it looked like someone beat me to it.
Aidan found his blood surrogate all right and Saint Ryanne wasn't looking all that saintly at the moment. I guess she forgot who she was supposed to bring dinner to. Which was fine, I wasn't really hungry anymore.
I stood frozen, unable to turn away never mind turn and run. She was draped across his lap. Her shirt was unbuttoned. One hand caressed a breast, the other slid beneath her jeans caressing other things. The sound I heard, had mistaken for Aidan's pain was actually Ryanne's pleasure.
Fangs pierced her neck, her blood filling his mouth as endorphins filled her body. I knew from experience the sensations he could send through every nerve ending until it felt like you would burst out of your skin. I was intimately acquainted with the hands that held her as he fed. There was nothing inappropriate in his touch, one hand supporting her neck, the other beneath her legs. Almost clinical as far as feedings went. My eyes told me there was nothing sexual about it, at least not for him, that it was just another feeding. A necessary feeding if he wanted to heal the stab wound.
He was a vampire and vampires needed blood. Blood that I couldn't give him. Hadn't I been contemplating that exact thing only moments ago? Was this the universe's way of answering my question? Aidan's had my blood but I wasn't feeding him. Until recently he hadn't wanted that to be a part of our relationship. I knew he wasn't living entirely off synthetic, not with the injuries he sustained in his line of work. Was it like this with all the surrogates? Could I handle this? Even if Aidan wasn't doing anything, could I deal with women having this reaction to him?
So many thoughts ran through my mind but I couldn't process anything with Ryanne writhing on his lap. It may have been just another meal for him but did he have to make it so fucking erotic for her? He could control what she felt. The level of pain or pleasure was totally up to him, he'd told me as much. And by the sounds Ryanne made the level of pleasure was pretty high. Jealousy spread through my body faster than Ryanne's climax. I needed to get out of here before I did something I would regret tomorrow, like punching that ginger bitch in her face.
I backed up, easing out of the room when I wanted to run. My back bumped the door making a soft thud. Barely audible, unless you were a vampire. A vampire who would have heard my heartbeat from the hallway. A vampire who would have smelled me, sensed every emotion before I even opened the door.
His eyes flicked to me, finally acknowledging me even though he had to have known I was there the whole time. There was nothing there, no emotion. No lust or passion for the half naked woman on his lap. No pain or remorse for what he had to know this would do to me, to us. Detachment. That's what it was. He was completely detached from everything happening right now.
"Fucking bastard." I managed to choke back a sob. "You bastard."
Before I turned to slam the door behind me something flickered in his eyes. Sorrow? As quickly as it came it was gone, leaving his beautiful eyes blank again. The door hit the jam so hard when I left the room I was certain I heard mortar from the solid stone walls rain down on the floor.
I was at the front door before I knew it. Stepping into my boots and grabbing a coat off one of the hooks, I stormed out of the house. The cold, damp air seeped into my clothes, threatening to chill my bones. I was hardly dressed to be out in this weather, I didn't even have socks on, but I didn't stop. I couldn't be in that house right now even if it did cost me my toes. I needed to think, clear my head, instead of acting on my first emotion - which was usually anger. My teeth chattered as I paced the back yard.
He wanted me to see him with her. Why? Because he wanted to hurt me like I hurt him? I didn't mean to but I had basically been flaunting the attraction Mason and I had in front of him. I had already broken his trust when I kissed him. But he had broken mine when he decided he would turn me without my consent. Of course I didn't know that at the time my tongue was entangled with Mason's.
I started to lose feeling in my fingers and toes, I paced harder hoping that getting my blood pumping would keep the frostbite at bay. I couldn't stop imagining him with all those surrogates, all those women. And I knew it was women because Aidan preferred pleasure to pain. If he ordered dinner in it wouldn't be a man.
But feeding didn't mean fucking did it? He certainly wanted me to think that, but his hands weren't on her breast, between her legs. Ryanne gave herself physical release because of what Aidan made her feel. Of course he could be up there right now, balls deep, releasing himself into her for all I knew.
Conry joined me but I wouldn't take comfort in the warmth radiating off of him. Sensing I needed to be alone he wandered off but I knew he still kept watch. My dog was the one constant in my life. I walked in circles until it felt like my skin was being pelted with shards of ice.
After a couple hours in the elements the only conclusion I came up with was Aidan had decided to cut me loose. Sometimes love isn't enough, no matter how much you want someone, care about them. It's entirely possible to fall in love with someone who isn't good for you. Wasn't I going to have a conversation with Aidan about that very thing before I walked in on them together? Wasn't I about to ask him if a vampire could have a relationship without blood? Ask myself if I could share him if he said yes?
He had already figured out why I hadn't offered my blood to heal him. That first night, when he was shot repeatedly, I hadn't hesitated to feed him. He had to know. Just like he knew if we tried to sit down, go over the pros and cons, we'd end up talking ourselves out of ending it because we both desperately wanted it to work no matter how many signs told us it couldn't.
He wanted me to think he cheated on me, to hate him for it. He was wrong. I could have forgiven him. It wouldn't have been as fast as he had forgiven me for kissing Mason but I would have gotten there eventually.
I would have worked through it- the fact that his feedings were based in pleasure, that he was weak from his injury and things had gotten out of control. I would have remembered how much he loved me, that I was his a chuisle - whatever the fuck that meant. If that's what had really happened I could have forgiven him. But what I couldn't forgive, would never forget, was how he used my insecurities against me. He used something I secretly feared to purposely hurt me. And I let him do it. Again.
I whistled for Conry, spindling the between before he was even by my side. I let it fill the holes in my heart and spirit until I couldn't hold any more without stepping through the veil. It felt so good, better than I'd felt in weeks. This was who I was. This was what I was supposed to be. I needed to forget about the disaster that was my love life and focus on the bitch who kept me out of the between, away from the one thing that completed me. I was the daughter of Arawn, Lord of the Other World. It was time I accepted my heritage and did what I was born to do. Hunt.
"And just where do you think you're going?"
I spun around, startled by the sound of Mason's voice. I lost my concentration and the between’s energy in my body uncoiled, became something wild. I needed to release it. I tried to force it out but nothing happened. I screamed, it hurt. Oh god, it hurt.
Before I could ask, Mason was there, trying to help me ground the energy before I fried my brain. "Give it to me, let it go." His arms wrapped around me, he tried to leech the energy from my body. "You need to stop resisting me. You're blocking me. I can't help you if you don't trust me. Let me all the way in."
His voice was gentle, whispering all the right words in soothing tones but I was past the point of trusting anyone, at least tonight. Hell maybe forever. I needed to control this without Mason's help. I had to do this. I never held the between inside any longer than I had to. It was stupid to pull so much and hold on to it for so long knowing I couldn't use it.
Chills racked my body, while a fever scorched my brain. You can do this. I opened myself up to the between again, fighting the rush of power as it tried to claim every cell in my body. I was a wide open channel and I needed to reverse the flow of energy and then close it off.
I focused all my concentration on one thought, sending the energy back into the between. My head flew back, slamming against Mason's collar bone, my back arched as my chi was drawn to the source of the energy filling it. Releasing this much unused, raw energy hurt like a son of a bitch. I felt the ripple as the first ounce of power returned to the between. It surged to the point of a tidal wave by the time the last drop left me. I think I blacked out for a second.
Mason scooped me up and carried me back inside the house, over the threshold and straight back to his room. When he tried to set me down on the bed I clung to his neck, too exhausted to manage anything but muttering the word fire. He set me on my feet while he spread out a few heavy blankets like a makeshift mattress. I was already curled up on the floor in front of the fireplace before he could set out the last blanket. He covered me with it instead and sat down next to me.
"Want to tell me where you were going?" He made lazy circles with his hand on my back.
"I wasn't going anywhere."
"You spindled enough energy to move the Emerald Isle to a tropical location. You were going after Bathory. Now tell me why."
"I wasn't going after Bathory. Not yet anyway. I haven't moved through the between in so long. I miss it. It's a part of me, you know? I only meant to pull a little, enough to fill the holes." I whispered, "To stop the hurt, the ache in my heart."
"What was that last part?"
"Nothing."
"I know you want to go after Bathory and Caligula. And we will. Soon. But you've got to be able to sense a cloaked vampire, sense when someone else is moving in the between and cover your own trail so no one can follow you when you jump. Promise me you won't try to jump again until then."
"I said I wasn't going anywhere. I wasn't jumping."
"Then tell me what had you so upset you didn't realize you pulled enough energy to fry your brain like an egg if you didn't release it."
I didn't have the strength or the desire to verbalize what happened. I rolled away from his comforting touch, closed my eyes and pretended to be asleep.
"Okay, Maurin. I'll let you off the hook tonight but we are going to talk about this in the morning." He brushed the hair out of my face. Tucking a strand behind my ear, he leaned in. "You smell like my soap. I like it." With a kiss behind my ear he was gone.
Conry quickly took his place, his massive head resting on my hip. I fell asleep with the warmth of the fire on my face and my guardian at my back.
19
The smell of freshly brewed coffee was enough to have one eye cracked open. They both wouldn't open until I actually drank some. I was about fifty percent functional after my second cup. Was that bacon?
"Out of bed sleepy head." He ruined his dark and smoldering image with all this morning sunshine.
"What time is it?"
/> "Seven thirty."
"Not even coffee and bacon will get me out of bed before eight."
"What about coffee, bacon, eggs and rye toast with raspberry preserves."
My stomach sent out a distress signal, growling loud enough to be mistaken for a grizzly bear. I sat up, shivering when the warmth of my blanket cocoon pooled around my waist.
The plate was five star hotel quality, complete with orange garnishes and a bowl of fresh strawberries and blueberries. Once I saw it, there was nothing that could come between me and that breakfast. For the first time in - probably ever - I ate before I had coffee, shoving an entire piece of bacon in my mouth. I washed it down with black coffee. "Oh my god, it's real bacon." I moaned my satisfaction over the pork perfection. How could something so good be so bad?
"I'm suddenly jealous of the bacon."
I almost choked on my coffee from laughing. "I switched to turkey bacon a couple of years ago. I forgot how good it is", I said around a mouthful of eggs.
"Either I'm a better cook than I thought or you never ate dinner last night."
"I was too wound up to eat."
"One more reason you weren't able to control the energy you pulled. Ready to tell me what had you so upset?"
"You made this?"
"I'll take that as a no. Ryanne isn't feeling well so I told her to stay home. I can manage breakfast."
"I bet she isn't feeling well." Mason looked at me for an explanation but I shoved toast in my mouth to prevent saying anything else. I would not have this conversation before my third cup of coffee if I could help it.
"Did something else happen? Something besides the vampires?"
"It's totally vampire related." I shoveled in the last of my eggs and poured another cup of coffee from the carafe, adding cream and sugar this time. "So what's on the training agenda for today?"