by Ford, Lizzy
“That doesn’t bother you, does it?” she asked.
“You are my nishani. I have already claimed you.”
It was his way of saying no. She hugged him more tightly. How did she tell him what the doctor told her? What did she say? That she was barren but not to worry – she’d be dead soon anyway and out of his life?
He loves me. I’d crush him. Yet there was a small voice in her mind that also pointed out how likely he to choose his duty and people over her, that he’d send her on the first ship back to Earth.
Not that she blamed him. He had a responsibility to an entire planet!
“You are upset?” A’Ran asked, stroking her hair.
She debated how to tell him news she didn’t quite feel ready to admit was true yet. “Just … homesick a little,” she lied. “Do you think you’d ever like to visit where I’m from?”
“One day, after Anshan is well.”
“We have a duty to the people.”
“We do, nishani.” He pushed her away enough to see her eyes. “A very important one that only you can do. I felt the grass.” For a moment, a different glow was in his eyes, one she knew stemmed from hope. “You can do what I failed to do.”
“You never failed at anything,” she said, touched by the words. “It’s not possible for a dhjan to fail.”
“You are mocking me.”
“Only a little.” She smiled. “You are the most incredible man in the world. Your people are fortunate to have someone like you to lead them.”
“And someone like you to heal them,” he added, warmth in his features. “You are the reason for everything, nishani. Because of you, the planet will live and so will the people. It is my honor to be the one who found you.”
She forced a smile and rested her ear on his chest once more, feeling as if her world was starting to implode. What would he do when he realized she wasn’t going to save anyone? When his planet died, and so did his bloodline?
Anshan chose the nishani for its king. Why, then, had the planet selected her out of everyone in the universe and given her such a gift to heal it, if she was never meant to live long enough to help? The more she thought about it, the more she believed that the planet itself had to be having its own issues. The doctor hadn’t been able to explain what was happening. Was it desperation that made her want there to be a problem with the planet and not her or was it really how her bond to Anshan might work?
The idea of letting down someone like A’Ran after all he’d been through made her feel ill. She’d left everything behind to be with him. Was she really about to lose it all?
“What is it, Kiera?” When A’Ran used her name instead of nishani, he was worried.
She forced her attention out of her thoughts and sought something to say. “Are you really considering sending Gage away?” she replied at last.
A’Ran was quiet too long.
Fear trickled into her. “Please tell me you’d never do that to someone you love, even if the circumstances were … less than perfect.” She held her breath, praying for him to clarify what Gage overheard.
“There are some parts to my society that you do not yet understand,” he began softly. “Some duties and trusts cannot be broken.”
Kiera’s heart tumbled to her feet. “But she’s your family.”
“Even for family.”
Oh, god. She’d been with him for a few weeks and already wasn’t able to imagine a life without him. How much would it hurt when he found out she wasn’t going to live long enough to carry out any of the duties that were hers?
How long would it take him to send her back to Earth, once he discovered there would be no more rulers in his line?
“It is for an honorable reason, one that is a sacred duty to me,” A’Ran said.
“I love you,” she whispered. “No matter what.”
“You are my nishani,” he squeezed her more tightly against him. “I would not do this if it weren’t necessary. Trust me, Kiera. I do this for us.”
Famous last words, she thought. Listening to his heartbeat, she didn’t want to imagine what life would be like without her new family.
What if that didn’t matter? What if her cell regeneration, as the doctor called it, was slowing enough that she wouldn’t last too much longer anyway? She’d ask him the next time she went to the medics. She already knew that, no matter what timeframe he gave her, she wanted to spend what she had left with the man holding her.
Her thoughts drifted back to Anshan and the mysterious bond she had to the planet. If the doctor wasn’t able to shed light on what was happening, her only choice appeared to be returning to the planet to figure out if it, too, was suffering what she was going through. If so, maybe she could fix it before things got worse, the same way she woke up the planet a few weeks before.
If not …
The pain of possibly losing A’Ran made it difficult for her to breathe.
I need to go back, she vowed. I need to know for sure.
Chapter One
Several days later
On Kiera’s first visit to Qatwal, she’d been kidnapped into space by her best friend. On her second, she’d been brought back from Earth by the same friend to save Qatwal from destruction.
But her third visit was ranking as the most awkward yet. She stood in the hallway outside the banquet hall in the traditional, formal robe of the Anshan nishani – peach, silk-like material interwoven with threads of gray Anshan metal and a wide, red leathery waistband. A ceremonial knife made of the metal was at her hip, and her jewelry was made of the same subdued metal worked into the shapes of animals and random doodles she’d designed with the help of the metalworkers. A filigreed tiara was snugly attached to her hair and the rose-gold band marking her as A’ran’s lifemate around one arm.
A’Ran was stiff beside her, dressed similarly in the understated uniform of the Anshan royalty. The small crowd across the entrance from them was decked out in clothing far more colorful and lavish with gems that glowed every color under the sun. After her time with A’Ran, she understood all their gems were worth far less than the metal she wore, and they openly admired her tiara with envy.
At the moment, the two parties were waiting for Romas, the king of Qatwal, before anyone moved.
Kiera strained to recall her latest dream. She’d been dreaming of Anshan for a week straight, but the images were too quick and liquid for her to make out many of the forms she saw before they had changed into something else. She didn’t think the Anshan palace looked like this one, though. At least, she hadn’t seen it in her dreams, though she’d seen other places: the storm, a field of green grass, an underground river …
“Why did Gol-dee-locks go into a house if predatory creatures lived there?” A’Ran whispered without breaking his I’m-in-charge façade.
She blinked out of her thoughts and glanced up at him.
“Was this the same village where the seven little men lived?” Leyon, her lifemate’s cousin, piped up from behind her.
They spoke quietly enough for the party across the hall not to hear.
Kiera sighed. She’d been trying unsuccessfully to explain the concept of fairy tales to men from a culture that didn’t understand the difference between history and fables.
“No,” she replied. “All the stories I told you happen in different places.”
“Like the Five Galaxies. They’re on different planets,” A’Ran said.
“Did they have spacecraft?” Leyon asked.
“You said each tale has a lesson. What is this lesson?” asked Mansr. “Should she not know better than to go into the house of beasts and eat their food?”
“Maybe she meant to go into the house with the seven little men and make them breakfast,” Leyon suggested.
“No,” she snapped. “You can’t mix the stories!”
The party across the hall from them shifted as Romas appeared, and they fell silent.
Sounds of cheerful talking and laughter tumbled out of the banquet h
all, along with the scent of food, into the silent hallway. But for once, Kiera couldn’t find any reason to smile.
Evelyn, her pregnant, former best friend was radiant as always at the side of the Qatwali ruler, Romas, who was A’Ran’s on-again, off-again enemy. Kiera had spent much time trying to figure out what she felt towards Evey, whose selfishness had nonetheless brought Kiera to A’Ran and a world that needed her.
But this evening, it wasn’t her internal conflict over all Evey had done troubling her. It was the bump of her friend’s belly, the reminder of Kiera’s visit to the Anshan medics when she’d learned the awful truth.
She’d considered herself the luckiest woman in the universe to have found A’Ran, only to discover she was going to devastate both of them when she broke the news to him.
The tension between the two kings was palpable. A’Ran hadn’t wanted to come at all let alone bring Kiera, but the ruler of Qatwal had insisted they both be present before they began negotiations about trading Anshan metal for the atmospheric cleaners A’ran needed from Qatwal.
Kiera wanted to take A’Ran’s hand and experience his strength, a reassurance against an unfriendly reception. Newly arrived to the planet, she held no love for the spaceships ferrying them around and felt little less apprehensive about being here than A’Ran. He had, after all, destroyed half the planet. She’d learned a lot about politics, but even she was surprised they hadn’t been blasted out of the sky upon arrival into orbit.
“It’s a pleasure to see you again.” Ever the socialite, Evey was the first to speak. Kiera was almost relieved someone had broken the awful silence.
A’Ran didn’t make any move to respond, but Kiera felt it necessary. “Thank you.”
“Would you … uh …” Evey glanced at her husband before decisively breaking ranks with the Qatwali royals to enter the space between the two parties. “… care to walk in with me? The Queen always goes first.” Her eyes twinkled at the words.
Kiera didn’t want to leave A’Ran’s side after their last interaction with the Qatwali. She glanced up at him. He was impossible to read when he was in king-mode, but he didn’t indicate she should stay. He was leaving the decision up to her.
“Sure,” Kiera said. She stepped forward and was accompanied by three of the personal guard A’Ran had brought to ensure her safety. The huge warriors made it hard to be inconspicuous and even harder to have a moment of privacy with anyone.
She joined Evey, and the two of them entered the banquet hall lined with low tables, close to a hundred strangers and heaps of food.
All talk silenced the moment Kiera walked in. Her step slowed, and she took in the looks ranging from disbelief to anger to sorrow, unable to help feeling guilty knowing A’Ran had destroyed so much of this planet. She’d always been self-conscious around the people of Qatwal, all of whom resembled tall, lithe models from Earth with flawless features and clear-colored eyes. She was on the small side, hence her nickname nishani-mani among the Anshan, who were themselves darker skinned yet still tall and willowy.
“Keep walking. Never let them see weakness,” Evey said and took her arm. A large smile was on her face, and she walked on as if nothing was wrong. If there was one thing Evey knew, it was how to fake a smile.
Kiera went with her, squeezing her friend’s arm to her side hard. They reached the table on a dais at the center of the hall and slid into their seats beside each other. Kiera clenched her hands in her lap, uncertain what troubled her more this night: being unwelcome by an entire planet or the secret she kept from A’Ran.
Talk trickled through the onlookers and slowly, they returned to their food and discussions.
“Are you well?” Evey asked when the attention of everyone had shifted away from them.
Are we really going to pretend we’re still friends? Kiera gave the blonde beside her a long look before answering. “Yeah. You?”
“Lots of challenges but overall amazing,” Evey said. “We’ve managed to start rebuilding.”
“Already?”
“I know, right? Their technology is incredible. Any luck with returning to Anshan?”
“Some,” Kiera replied, uncertain how much she was supposed to say about A’Ran’s plans. “I went to visit last week.”
“Isn’t it toxic?”
“Yeah. They have these weird Jell-O suits that let you walk around in the middle of all the poisonous storms and stuff.”
“Jell-o suits.” Evey giggled. “We’re the only two here who would get that.”
Despite not wanting to fall into the trap she always did with Evey, Kiera found the charismatic woman’s smile and cheerful voice hard to block. “Yeah.”
“Is something wrong?”
Kiera raised her eyebrows.
“I mean, more wrong than usual,” Evey added. “Aside from the war, politics, and whatever else.”
“Like you said. Lots of challenges.” It wasn’t like Kiera to be guarded around anyone, and she hated how it made her feel. But there wasn’t anyone she could really trust with the secret eating her up inside, though being with Evey again left her wishing she could. Her gaze went to the entrance, and she waited anxiously for A’Ran to join her.
“I think they wanted to talk first,” Evey said.
“Oh.” Disappointed, Kiera glanced over her shoulder at the three Anshan warriors that stood at the base of the dais. The sight of her husband’s men comforted her in the hall full of strangers.
“Here. Try this one. It’s my fave.”
Kiera waited for her friend to spoon one of the many strange casseroles lining the table onto her plate. Instead of utensils, the Qatwalis used flatbread to eat. She tried the sweet potato colored casserole. “It tastes like cookies,” she said, intrigued by the texture.
“That’s what I thought!” Evey spooned another onto her plate. “This one is like red velvet.”
Within moments of swearing she’d never open up to Evey again, Kiera was laughing and talking to her old friend. It was hard not to. Evey was outgoing and cheerful, and she’d always been good at drawing Kiera out of her shell, even if Kiera had many reasons not to trust her friend. If she’d learned anything, it was that she could have fun while knowing better than to confide in Evey. Gradually, she stopped glancing towards the entrance and waiting for A’Ran to appear.
The dinner was long, and the two of them ate alone on the dais at the center of the hall. When she was full, she sat back and glanced around the hall. The people of Qatwal seemed generally happy considering the disaster that had hit them so recently, and Kiera began to relax. She couldn’t help envying them having a planet to live on, and knowing the people weren’t going to starve if they were eating this well.
The Anshan people still struggled. She understood how much was on A’Ran’s shoulders. He needed the rare gray metal to trade for food for his people, to clean up the air on the planet where they should have been living, and to bring back everyone who had been scattered across the Five Galaxies until they had a home once more.
With everything he was already juggling, A’Ran didn’t need to know she, and his planet, were dying. At least, not until she was able to figure out how to fix it.
At least Qatwalis had a place to live, even if half of it was destroyed.
“You’re not usually like this,” Evey said, pulling her out of her thoughts.
Kiera focused on her surroundings once more. Evey’s gaze was concerned. “I’m fine,” Kiera said. “Just a lot going on.”
“You want to go for a walk and talk about it?”
Kiera hesitated too long, and Evey rose. “Come on. I can show you my favorite place.”
“Um, okay.” Kiera glanced towards the door then the warriors. “Is it far?”
“No. This is our central palace, for lack of a better description. It used to be the vacation spot for royals, but the real palace was destroyed. Basically, it’s a backup.”
“This is a backup?” Kiera stood and gazed around. Everything about the palace was
opulent, luxurious, from the precious gray metal statues adorning the hallways to the gems and metals acting as floorboards to the dress of those who lived here.
It was the opposite of the Anshan moon where she lived far more simply.
“My husband says the Anshan are savages.” Evey winked.
“They’re good people,” Kiera replied.
“Come on.” Evey took her arm again and walked through the banquet and into the hallway.
No one stopped to glare at Kiera, for which she was relieved, and she breathed a sigh when she reached the quiet, wide corridors, away from public view. Evey had no guard detail, and Kiera’s bodyguards kept their distance, rendering the walk down the hallway almost peaceful.
Evey led them through several hallways into a private courtyard guarded by two Qatwali warriors. Low, stone benches made of ruby colored stone were placed among blooming night flowers and a trickling stream that wove through the garden. Qatwal’s two moons were close together overhead, their light bright enough to bath the area in silver.
The Anshan moon was getting crowded, with even the smallest patches of available terrain used for gardening smaller vegetables. The atriums of the home where she lived had been converted this past week into fragrant herb gardens.
Evey sat on one of the benches, and Kiera sank onto it beside her. She had forgotten what it was like to have a few moments of quiet.
“I love it here,” Evey said. “It’s a little oasis from the rest of the world.”
“It’s beautiful,” Kiera agreed.
“I know you, K-K. Something’s bothering you.”
Kiera was quiet.
“I know things between us got weird.” Evey paused and cleared her throat. “I don’t want that. I want my friend back.”
“I don’t think that can happen, Evey,” was Kiera’s quiet response. “Some things are hard to move past.”
The silence was awkward. Kiera breathed in the scents of water and plants.
“How about acquaintances or … I think they call them allies around here. The good kind of allies, not like our frenemy husbands who alternately blow up each other’s planets.”
