“You’re going to get through this,” he said. “You’re a strong woman.”
She didn’t want to be strong anymore. She was tired of being strong. Tired of taking care of everyone. She wanted to lean on someone else for a change. It felt so good just to be held.
She let the emotions from the past day pour out of her. She wept for her broken marriage, and for the way Linn had betrayed her, and for the loss of the baby.
The baby.
Her heart constricted at the thought. Oh, Jesus, I wanted that baby! And I thought You were leading me to adopt the child. But I must’ve been wrong How could I have been so wrong?
She cried for all the loss, grateful for Kyle’s strong arms and gentle touch. He was quiet all through it, as if sensing she just needed to let go of the pain.
When she was done, she was spent from the emotional release, from the lack of sleep the night before. She felt strangely content to just be in Kyle’s arms. He, too, must’ve felt comfortable enough, for he didn’t move, didn’t shift, just continued to hold her. Her thoughts turned toward him, and she thought how odd it was to feel so at home in his embrace No man had held her since Keith.
She heaved a deep sigh and turned her face so that her cheek rested against the soft, damp material of his shirt. Beneath the material, his heart beat strong and steady. She should pull away, she’d leaned on him long enough. But she couldn’t bring herself to do so just yet. Just a few more minutes, and she would leave the comfort of his arms. But a few minutes later, she was lost in the depths of sleep.
CHAPTER TWENTY-NINE
Paula took the elevator from the garage, and when the door whooshed open, she walked out into the lobby. Chicago was a wonderful place to be. She’d enjoyed every minute of her two days here. Seeing the station had been an eye-opener. It was nothing like the podunk station in Jackson. And the people were quick and professional and hip. She’d gone out earlier just to walk the streets. The city was so alive. You could almost feel the energy. She belonged here. She only hoped Miles, the station manager, felt the same way.
She thought of David and how he’d not even said good-bye before she left. Her stomach took a dive at the thought. Over the past few days, he’d started the process of buying out JH Realty without so much as checking with her, so why should she care what he thought about her career direction?
She glanced around the lobby for Miles. He was taking her to dinner on her last night in Chicago. She saw him across the lobby seated beside an enormous marble stand sporting a large vase of fresh flowers. She approached, confident that the suit she’d selected made her look every inch a big-city reporter.
“Paula, right on time.” Miles shook her hand. His salt-and-pepper hair was wind-blown, but it only added to his good looks.
She put on her prettiest smile. “You’re not a man to be kept waiting, Miles.”
He laughed, and she knew he felt appropriately flattered. Men like him wanted to matter, wanted people to sense their importance. Paula would make sure he felt respected on this, their last evening together. Her dream job might depend on how well this meal went.
He ushered her into a taxi that was waiting at the curb, and within moments they were at Narcisse, seated across from each other. Instead of the quiet atmosphere she’d expected, the restaurant bustled with activity, and the tables were crammed together. It was so different from Jackson, where most of the locals knew each other, at least by face. Here, no one spoke to anyone at the other tables. And that meant there was none of that small-town gossip she despised. No one knowing all your business.
Paula knew Miles had spent time this afternoon reviewing her test tape. She was more than eager to hear what he had to say, but she wouldn’t appear eager. She had to play it cool, as if there were other networks beating down her door.
He ordered a bottle of wine and turned off his cell phone. A good sign; he didn’t want to be interrupted. After the waiter had poured their drinks, Paula took a sip, noting the Merlot was one of the best she’d ever had.
“I reviewed your new tape this afternoon, Paula,” Miles said once he set his glass down.
She cocked her head, eager to hear more. She was glad he couldn’t see the rapid fluttering of her heart.
“You’re good.” He nodded slowly. “Very good.”
“Thank you.” She took another sip, glad her hand wasn’t trembling. Would he offer her the job tonight? What would she say when she hadn’t come to an agreement with David?
“Even though the tape your station sent us was terrific, we honestly didn’t expect to find such talent in a small town like Jackson Hole. Your delivery today was exceptional, your ad-libbing brilliant, and you’re not too hard on the eyes either.”
She laughed, enjoying the compliments. She knew she was good at what she did, but she could hardly believe this big-city pro was impressed. She was beginning to think she had the job all sewn up.
“Now, you know the job is a temporary assignment, but whomever we hire has an opportunity for something more permanent. And it’s no secret that our key anchor is thinking of retiring. I can see you in that role easily.”
She wondered if her head were swelling visibly. “Thank you. I’m passionate about working my way up, and I think you’ll find me dedicated to whatever job I’m entrusted with.”
He nodded. “Your station manager told me as much, but its nice to hear it from the horse’s mouth, so to speak.”
When the waiter came and took their orders, Paula stifled a pang of irritation. Miles was on the cusp of offering her the job, and she just wanted to hear the words. She allowed him to order for her, since she hadn’t even opened her menu. When the waiter left, Miles’s attention returned to her.
“What time is your flight tomorrow?”
The question caught her off-guard. She was hoping they’d pick up right where they’d left off. “Seven-thirty. So you can’t keep me out too late.” She smiled coyly.
He returned her smile. “You do know how to burst a man’s bubble. He winked.
The conversation turned to the business of TV news in general, but the whole time Paula wondered why he hadn’t offered her the job. The food arrived, and the conversation trickled off a bit, since they were busy eating. Only after Miles had paid the bill did he finally bring up the job.
“I’m sure Cindy told you about the other reporters we’re interviewing,” he said.
Her heart stopped cold. His assistant had failed to mention that little detail.
“We won’t be needing the job filled until December, so it may be a month or two before you hear back from me.” He stood up and helped her from her chair.
She smiled confidently. “I’ll look forward to hearing from you, then.” Inside, she was deflating like a punctured raft.
Natalie dropped off the boys at her mom’s house and rushed back to the car. She was running behind again, this time because she hadn’t been able to get the garage door to close. And when she’d gotten into her car, she’d realized she needed gas now.
Everything seemed different since that awful day a week and a half ago. She’d finally broken the news to the boys about the adoption. Alex had gotten mad, demanding to know why. It seemed impossible for him to accept her generic “it just didn’t work out” answer. But she wouldn’t tell him more. She had never told him about his father’s affair and wasn’t planning to start now.
Her family had been a different story. Paula had nodded and murmured her sympathies, while her eyes betrayed no surprise at all. Hanna and her mom had offered the support she’d expected. They’d had just the right amount of righteous indignation to leave Natalie feeling justified. Only somehow, the justification was wearing off. She shrugged away the thought as she signaled a left turn.
Kyle had also been a great support. The night she’d told him about Linn, she’d fallen sound asleep in his arms and hadn’t woken up until the next morning. At first, she’d been confused, waking up on the couch. When she saw the throw cover over her, she
remembered crying in Kyle’s arms and realized he must’ve covered her and left. Even now, the thought brought a warm, cozy feeling to her insides.
As she drove by Bubba’s Bar-B-Que, she glanced at the building, wondering if Linn was working.
She tore her eyes away. What did she care if Linn was working? Not Linn. Lindsey. She should start calling her by her real name. Linn was a friend. Lindsey was a betrayer. The name brought up every ugly feeling a person could have. She’d honestly wondered if she was capable of hurting the girl. She’d had thoughts she hadn’t had since discovering the affair. I thought I’d forgiven this, God. I thought I was over it, yet if I was, why is this weighing on me so heavily? Why am I so angry?
She turned down Pearl Avenue and turned her thoughts to her day ahead. She had a new volunteer starting today and would need to show her the ropes. Beth had gone through training like all the others, and Natalie had high hopes she would be good at counseling the clients.
She pulled into the parking lot behind the center, slid into a slot, and exited her car. She had about an hour to get some things done before Beth arrived. Not as much as she’d hoped for, but enough to get most of it done if the phone stayed quiet.
She rounded the corner of the building and walked along the sidewalk. The August heat had started early on this day. She figured it must be in the eighties already. She thought of Linn again and wondered how she was coping with a pregnancy during this heat. She shoved the thought firmly away. She didn’t want to think about Linn today. She was sick to death of thinking about Linn.
It was the crackle of glass under her feet that caught her attention first. She looked down at the pebble-sized pieces, her mind wondering quickly where they had come from. Before she could finish the thought, her eyes swung to the center’s plate glass windows. The tempered glass was shattered, and hundreds of glass shards lay at the base of the building.
She approached the door with her key in hand but quickly saw she didn’t need the key. The glass on the door was broken, and the door was ajar. Instinctively, she took a step back.
“Oh, heavens! What’s happened?” The voice came from behind Natalie.
She jumped before turning and seeing Betty, the owner of the Shady Nook. “I don’t know. I just got here,” Natalie said.
“I was just getting ready to flip the ’Open’ sign in the window when I looked out and saw. Oh, honey, what a mess.”
“I need to call the sheriff,” Natalie said. But not from in there, she thought. What if someone was still in there? She backed away, almost stumbling down the curb.
Betty took her arm. “Come on. You can call from the diner.”
After Natalie had made the call, she sipped the coffee Betty had perked and stared at the center across the road. She was shaken, and she hated that. Memories of the night she’d been held in her car came flooding back with such reality she could almost feel the sting of her scalp as her assailant grasped her hair.
She shuddered. Was this vandalism related to that? And what about the graffiti incident? Was it all related or just a set of coincidences? Had someone vandalized the center because of their work there, or was it just some drunk tourists with too much time on their hands?
“Here they come,” Betty said, peeking out the window where the sheriff’s was pulling to the curb.
She poured two cups of coffee for Sheriff Whitco and his deputy as they entered the diner. They took off their hats and greeted the women.
“You’re having a bad year, Natalie,” Sheriff Whitco said.
He didn’t know the half of it. Between the violence and harassment at the center and the strife in her personal life, she was beginning to think there was a sick joke being played on her.
The officers went to investigate the center while Natalie kept Betty company. The woman started the food prep while they talked, but Natalie found herself wanting Kyle’s company. She felt insecure. Her world was being shaken from all directions, and he was a great stabilizer in her life. She toyed with the idea of calling him, biting her lip until she tasted blood.
She forgot about Kyle when she saw Beth rounding the corner of the center. She’d forgotten all about the volunteer. She rushed out the door and crossed the street.
“Oh, my goodness, what happened?” Beth asked.
“Just a little vandalism. Nothing a good security system won’t cure.” The sarcasm in her voice made her cringe. “Sorry. Its been a rough morning.”
“You weren’t here when it happened …”
“Oh, no. It was like this when I got here. Hey, why don’t you take the morning off? We’re not going to get any training done today.”
“No way. I’ll stay and help you clean up this mess.” Beth gave a sharp nod, and Natalie felt like hugging her.
Sheriff Whitco and his officer came out the door, and Natalie studied him, waiting for answers.
He shrugged. “It’s a royal mess in there, but I guess you’d already figured on that.”
Thank God for insurance, but it would be a nuisance to clean the building and replace everything that had been damaged. And some things would never be replaceable. She thought of the collage with pictures of clients and their babies and hoped it hadn’t been ruined.
“Is this related to the other incidents?”
“Hard to say for sure, but it’s likely at least two of the three are related.”
She stifled her frustration. Why couldn’t they get to the bottom of this? Her attacker had never been identified, the graffiti incident had hardly even been looked into, and now this. What would happen next?
“You need to get yourself an alarm and a better lock on that door.”
“And you need to figure out who’s doing this stuff,” she said sharply. She never spoke that way to an elder, much less an authority, and one she’d known for years.
He raised his brows. “Yes, ma’am.”
She apologized for her tone, then Sheriff Whitco recommended some safety measures, promising to do his best on the case.
After they left, she and Beth entered the center. Natalie stopped dead in her tracks. Nothing was as it had been before. Every table, chair, and shelf was overturned. Papers were strewn everywhere; equipment was demolished. She closed her eyes against the sting in them. Oh, God, why is this happening? How are we ever going to get this back the way it was?
“Well”—Beth laid an arm across her shoulder—“the sooner we get started, the sooner we can set it back to rights. If you give me some names of other volunteers, I’ll see if anyone’s available to come help.”
Natalie offered a feeble smile. “Let’s get to work.”
CHAPTER THIRTY
Linn shut the break room door and pulled a chair to the corner, where the phone sat on a table. She wasn’t sure she could do this. But what choice did she have? Her shift was over, it was dark out, and she had no place to stay tonight. She looked at her bare finger. She’d already sold the sapphire ring Keith had given her. Good riddance. But she hadn’t gotten much for it, and that money was long gone.
She eyed the phone again and wondered if she had it in her to make the call. Natalie had been the kindest, most compassionate woman Linn had ever met. She’d wondered a dozen times why Keith had left a woman like that for her. He must’ve been crazy. But Linn had totally blown it with Natalie. She could surely never forgive Linn for what she’d done.
It had been almost two weeks. Maybe Natalie had calmed down some. Like a lot, if she had any chance at all. She picked up the extension and dialed before she could change her mind. She pictured Natalie’s face the last time she’d seen her. She’d hardly seen the woman upset, much less seething with rage. And Linn deserved her anger, didn’t she? She didn’t deserve Natalie’s forgiveness. Her eyes began to burn again.
“Hello?”
It was Natalie, and her voice sounded calm and cool. She couldn’t do it. She didn’t have the gall. She hung up the phone, her heart skittering in her chest.
The break room door burst op
en, and her friend Kayley entered. “Still here?”
Linn shrugged. Like she had any place to go.
Kayley took off her apron and stuffed it in her locker. “Can’t find a place to stay? Did you try your dad again?”
“Not yet.” Her friends from high school had left for college the previous week, and she had no family other than her dad. She was out of luck.
“Kayley, can I maybe just come over one last time? I’ll work something else out tomorrow—” She stopped when she saw her friend shaking her head slowly.
“Sorry, Linn, but Mom’s on days now, so she’s home at night. And she ’bout had a fit when she found out you stayed last week. I’m practically grounded till I graduate.”
Linn nodded. “Sorry you got grounded.” What was she going to do? She glanced at her watch and saw it was almost ten o’clock. What would happen to her if she slept outside somewhere? It was warm enough, but was it safe? She felt the baby move and put a hand on her belly.
Kayley gave her a sympathetic hug and slipped out the door. What would she do now? The only other option was to call her dad. He would ask her if she’d had an abortion. She was beginning to think that was her only option. What was she thinking trying to have a baby when she didn’t even have a place to sack out at night? Her baby had no loving parents, no future. It would have been great if things had worked out with Natalie, but she didn’t have the luxury of thinking that way now. She didn’t even know what the laws were. It might be too late to have an abortion here. But Kayley had told her of someplace in Kansas that did late-term abortions. She cringed at the thought and shook the thought away.
She picked up the phone before she could change her mind and punched in the numbers. The phone rang and rang, and she feared he wasn’t even home. She looked at her watch. He should be home from work by now unless he’d stopped at Sidewinders for a few beers. She hadn’t talked to him in the three weeks since he’d kicked her out. Maybe he had softened a little.
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