JUSTIFIED (Motorcycle Club Romance)

by Bekkwith, Brynn

  “Of course,” I smiled. I didn’t dare tell her why I was really there and that it wasn’t our house.

  “Where is your husband anyway?” she asked as she playfully peeked around the room. “I haven’t met the guy yet.”

  “He’s at work right now,” I said, leaving it at that. “He’ll be home later. Maybe we can have you by for supper some night.”

  “I would just love that!” she cried out as she clasped her manicured hands together. She took a few steps to the door before turning around. “I forgot to give you my number.”

  She reached into her Chanel handbag and pulled out a scrap of paper and a pen before scribbling down her number for me.

  “See you soon!” she waved and smiled and with that she was gone.

  ***

  “I’m home,” Ash yelled Friday night as he came bursting through the door. Six days felt like eternity, and I all week I’d been dreaming of wrapping myself up in his giant arms the second I saw him again.

  “Daddy’s home!” I cheered as I walked towards the door with Tuck on my hip.

  Ash kissed us both and wrapped his strong arms around us.

  Ash tugged off his leather jacket and sat it down on the back of a chair before reaching out for Tuck.

  “We missed you,” I said as I rubbed his muscled and tatted arm. Ink-slinged marks with the club’s emblem and Tuck and I’s initials covered every inch of his upper arms and back. Joining the club changed him, and in a lot of ways, he felt like he owed his life to them. He was a latch key kid, abandoned by his father and his mother, a hardworking single mom, didn’t know the first thing about properly raising someone like him.

  “I need to get Mr. Tucker to bed,” I said as I reached out for him. “I let him stay up late tonight so he could see you.”

  Tuck rubbed his eyes and climbed back into my arms as I carried him to his bed. When I’d returned, Ash was resting with his feet up on the scratchy plaid sofa. His tired eyes closed and his hands folded on his stomach.

  “Tired?” I asked as I climbed over him. We always loved laying side by side on the couch together.

  His eyes fluttered a bit and his hands slid over to my hip and then up the bottom of my shirt.

  “Apparently you’re not that tired,” I giggled.

  His hands grasped the meat of my breasts and his five o’clock shadow tickled my neck as his lips pressed hot kisses into my skin.

  “God, I’ve missed you,” he sighed. A sexy growl rasped underneath his tone.

  “Me too,” I whispered. “I hate being apart.”

  His hands worked to unfasten my jeans and he tugged them down with a fierce, animalistic hunger. He climbed up and unbuckled his belt, revealing his massive hardness, which was fully loaded and ready to go. He positioned himself between my legs and inserted the tip slowly before hungrily jamming his cock inside me.

  I cried out and he covered my mouth in an effort to stifle the loudness. “Shh. Don’t wake up Tuck.”

  He plunged himself deep inside me, slipping a finger into my mouth, which I sucked and toyed with. His blue eyes never left mine while we made love. My fingers dug into the thick skin of his muscled back when all of a sudden I screamed out in pain.

  “What? What?” Ash asked. His eyes were wide with concern as he pulled himself out of me.

  Deep and merciless cramps filled my lower abdomen, and it seemed to have come from nowhere. I still hadn’t told him I was pregnant. “I don’t feel well.”

  “You don’t feel well?” he asked, confused. His eyes studied mine for the truth. “We were just…you seemed fine a minute ago…”

  “Can we do this another time?” I asked, trying to hide the tears that were welling in my eyes. The idea of yet another miscarriage filled my mind. This would be the third one, and it never got any easier.

  I stood up and began to put my clothes back on, hiding my face from Ash all the while. I could feel his eyes on me, studying me, trying to read between the lines. And maybe he knew, but he knew not to talk to me about it until I was ready.

  “Let me fix you a sandwich,” I said, trying to put a shred of normalcy back into the moment. I trudged off to the kitchen to try to clear my mind and make my man a bite to eat. As I whipped out the bread and meat, I spun around to grab a knife from the drawer and saw Ash standing in the doorway with his arms folded, watching me. “I’m fine, Ash.”

  He walked in and took a seat at the island while I plated his food. “You know you can talk to me.”

  He knew. He had to know. He knew me too well to not know.

  “So what’s the latest?” I asked, trying to change the subject. “Where are we at with all of this? When do we get to leave and go back home.”

  Ash sat up and cleared his throat, a look of seriousness spreading across his face. “Well, we’re working to counter the hit that was put on you and Tuck. We have to send a message to the Cottonmouths.”

  “So there was a hit,” I said. I knew it was assumed, but I never knew it was a for sure thing.

  Ash swallowed a lump in his throat and looked down at his plate. “Yeah.”

  “Great,” I said, not trying to hide the sarcastic tone in my voice.

  “I promise you, Marina, you and Tuck will be fine,” he said. He still hadn’t even touched his sandwich. “This is why you guys are here. You’re safer here than anywhere else.”

  “Who’s house is this anyway?” I asked. “I feel like I’m in the dark all the time.”

  “It belongs to the uncle of another club member. He’s been trying to sell it for years, but no one wants it because it’s in the middle of nowhere,” Ash said. “People don’t even know it exists.”

  “That’s both terrifying and comforting at the same time,” I huffed. “What’s with all the safety and security equipment?”

  “The uncle was a very paranoid man from what I hear,” Ash said. “I don’t know all the details, but the club is basically paying the uncle to let you and Tuck stay here.”

  It didn’t surprise me. My dad would do anything for his family, and desperate times called for desperate measures. Only it felt like his information didn’t quite match up with Mary Jane’s…

  “So how much longer do you think we’ll be here?” I asked.

  “No idea,” he said. “However long it takes to send our message to them. Hopefully soon though. I hate not being with you.”

  He reached over and pulled me by the wrist into his lap, wrapping his arms around me.

  “It’s only been a week,” I said. “I’m so bored here, Ash. I want to go home.”

  “Soon,” he said as I buried my head into the crook of his neck.

  CHAPTER 7

  The sun peeked through the curtains early Sunday morning. The faint sound of birds chirping and fluttering through the trees would’ve been perfectly fine if it weren’t for the fact that they served as a reminder that outside the fortress, life was going along like normal. I was almost jealous of them.

  I rolled over and stared at Ash. He always looked so peaceful in his sleep, and I could stare at him for hours if he’d let me. Almost always, he’d feel my eyes upon his face and wake up.

  “Marina,” he said, groggily. “You’re watching me sleep again.”

  “I know,” I sighed with a playful smile.

  I leaned over and gave him a good morning kiss before settling into the crook of his arm. We laid in silence, both quietly vowing not to get out of bed until we heard Tuck stirring.

  Moments later, the sound of crunching gravel outside the window prompted Ash to go flying out of bed. “What the hell?!”

  “What is it? What’s wrong?” Fear surged through me as I wrapped the blankets around my body.

  “Some Mercedes,” Ash said as he squinted through the curtains, trying to remain hidden behind them. “It’s a lady in a Mercedes. That’s weird.”

  “Maybe she wants to buy the house?” I said. I couldn’t believe I lied to my husband like that. If he knew I’d befriended a stranger out her
e and jeopardized our safety, he’d be furious.

  “It’s not on the market right now,” he said. “No one knows this place even exists.”

  “Ash…” I began to say. I had to come clean.

  “Huh,” Ash said, his eyes still honed in on the lady outside. “Now she’s leaving.”

  I squeezed my eyes and thanked my lucky stars.

  “If that car comes back, I need you to get the plate numbers,” he instructed. “There’s a set of binoculars in the drawer in the kitchen.”

  Through the paper-thin walls of the old mansion, I could hear Tucker calling my name. I threw my robe on and ran to him, thankful for the much needed distraction.

  I couldn’t help but wonder why Mary Jane came and left like that. It didn’t make any sense.

  ***

  “Is it time already?” I whined Sunday afternoon as Ash grabbed his leather jacket. The keys dangling from his hand meant only one thing; it was time for him to go back home. Hot tears filled my eyes, but I blinked them away.

  “I don’t want to go,” he whispered as he walked over to me. He placed his hands on my hips and pulled me in close for a kiss. “You know that.”

  We bumped our foreheads together, and I breathed in the musky, leather-and-woods scent that was Ash. Within minutes, he would be gone and all that would remain would be the smell of him.

  He pulled away and lifted my chin so that my eyes met his. “You still have your phone?”

  I bit my lip and nodded. I’d chucked it that day against the tree when I couldn’t get a signal, and I had no idea if it still worked or not.

  “You’re might have to go out and stand on top of a butte for it to work,” he said as he looked over my shoulder and out the window. The closest butte was easily a quarter of a mile away.

  I sniffed and turned my head to the side, but Ash brought it back to face him. “Why are you taking this so hard all of a sudden? This isn’t like you. It’s almost like you’re hormonal or something.”

  Realizing what he’d just said, he shook his head.

  “I didn’t mean it like that,” he said. He knew damn well. He kissed my lips softly and tried to make up for the crassness of his words. His fingers combed through my long, dark hair and brushed a few strands out of my eyes. I glanced up at him and took comfort in his love for me, because it was the realest thing I’d ever known.

  “Remember when we first met,” I said with a nostalgic smile. “That night when I walked in on a club meeting.”

  “Yeah, you were what? Seven? Eight?” Ash said with a smile. “The cutest thing ever.”

  “And you’d just moved to the neighborhood,” I said. “I knew you were one of us. I could just tell.”

  “You were my first friend,” Ash replied as he ran his fingers along my jaw and pulled me in for another kiss.

  “I was crying because my dad had just yelled at me, and I ran outside,” I said. “And you were there. Riding your bike. And you stopped and asked me what was wrong.”

  “Those tears,” Ash said as he placed his hand on his chest. “They broke my heart. I couldn’t stand to see a little girl cry like that.”

  “And then you asked me if I wanted to play Ninja Turtles with you,” I laughed. “We were inseparable after that.”

  He leaned in and kissed me one last time, rubbed Tuck on the top of his head, and turned to leave. “I’ll be back next weekend.”

  CHAPTER 8

  I watched Ash’s Ford pull up the long drive and turn onto the gravel road, leaving a trail of dust behind him, and I headed back to the kitchen to fix Tuck’s dinner.

  I rifled through the pantry in search of something he could eat. Ash had brought back a few groceries with him that weekend, but grocery shopping was never his strong suit and several staples were very much forgotten.

  “Ouch,” I cried out as I reached for a box of cereal on the top shelf. Stabbing pain seared through my lower abdomen, just as it had the night before, and just as it had when I’d lost two babies. The pain had left the night before, leading me to think it was a false alarm, but now it had returned with a vengeance.

  I hobbled over to Tuck and placed him in his high chair, grabbed the Trac Fone and ran outside. The butte looked so far away, but I had to make a call. I needed to catch Ash before he got too far away so he could come back and take me to the hospital.

  Through a quarter mile of grassy field and prairie, I’d finally reached the butte. I yanked the phone out of my pocket. One bar. One lousy, measly bar.

  I quickly dialed Ash’s number and tried to stay upright when my body was begging me to lie down and writhe in pain. The phone rang once. Then twice. Then three times. After five rings it went to voicemail. I hung up and tried once more. Nothing. Knowing him, the radio was cranked so high he’d never hear his phone.

  I pressed my fingers into my aching abdomen to try to counter the pain that was burning inside me. The warm wetness in my panties came next, and I didn’t have to look to know that I was bleeding.

  I buried my face in my palm and shook my head. I was going to have to call Mary Jane. She was the only other contact in my phone, and I knew she’d come running if I needed anything.

  “Mary Jane,” I said with a strain in my voice. It was obvious I’d been crying.

  “What is it, Marina?” she asked. “Are you okay? Is it Tuck?”

  “I need a ride to town,” I said. “It’s kind of an emergency.”

  Mary Jane asked no questions. “I’ll be there in an hour.”

  I hobbled back to the house and quickly fed Tuck, changed his diaper, and threw his diaper bag together. Ash would’ve killed me to know that I was leaving in a car with Mary Jane, but I knew she was harmless. She’d helped me with Tuck the week before. She was a sweet, kind person. From the outside it probably looked bad, but Ash would never let me explain anyway. It was pointless to make him worry for nothing.

  Mary Jane arrived exactly an hour later and helped load Tuck into the car. “What’s wrong, Marina?”

  Her brown eyes were kind and she placed her hand on my back. In some ways, I felt like we were just two friends. Never mind the complete randomness that brought us together and acquainted us in the first place.

  “I think I’m having a miscarriage,” I sighed. Hot tears burned my eyes once again, but I wiped them away before they had a chance to fall.

  “Oh, my goodness,” she said. She reached over and placed her hand on top of mine and squeezed it. “Let’s get you to the hospital.”

  We traveled down the country roads that led to the nearest town, and she pulled into the same hospital we’d visited the week before with Tuck.

  “Do you need a wheelchair?” she asked with raised eyebrows.

  “No, I’m okay,” I said. “I just need to take it slow. I’ll be fine.”

  When we arrived inside, Mary Jane helped me to my seat, placed Tuck on her hip, and went to the front check-in station to let them know what was going on. She was an angel. My angel.

  “They said it shouldn’t be much longer,” she said when she came back and took a seat across from me in the waiting room. She grabbed a book from the table next to her and began paging through it for Tuck. “Do you need to call your husband at all?”

  “No,” I said quickly. “He doesn’t know I’m pregnant. I haven’t told him yet.”

  “Marina Decker?” a nurse called out from a doorway by the front desk.

  I stood up, nodded at Mary Jane to assure her I’d be fine, and hobbled to the nurse.

  The nurse led me to a dark sonogram room and helped me onto the table. She lifted up my shirt and I pressed down on the waistband of my pants. I knew the drill. I’d been in that spot a million times before.

  I laid back and stared at the white, tiled ceiling and braced myself to hear the news I’d been dreading. As the nurse squirted warm jelly onto my stomach and began to move the wand around, all I could think about was Ash. He’d always gone to every doctor’s appointment with me, he had been there twice befo
re to carry me out of the clinic when I’d be sobbing like a crazy maniac.

  The whooshing of the ultrasound filled the quiet space between us until suddenly I heard a galloping noise coming from the speakers.

  “There it is,” the ultrasound tech said with a smile. She turned the screen towards me. “See it?”

  I leaned up, dumbfounded, and stared at the tiny, wiggly thing moving around on the screen.

  “Heartbeat is about 140,” she said. “That’s really good.”