Finding Maddox (The Road to Truth Book 3)

by Quell T Fox

  ​Does he not have a shower at his house?

  ​“I missed you,” he whispers into my ear, his hot breath making me tingle.

  ​“I missed you, too,” I respond. His mouth captures mine in a greedy kiss and I know he means the words that he speaks.

  ​“Can we talk?” I ask, once he pulls his lips away from mine. I miss them instantly.

  ​“I need to talk to Lenny first.” I nod my head in understanding, not at all upset about him telling me no. He continues out of the room, but before turning the corner he pauses and faces me, a hard look on his face. I frown, with the thought that he’s going to tell me something that I don’t want to hear.

  ​“We’ve all made a lot of mistakes, just as I’m sure you have, though I think ours are worse. Just know that we always have tried our best and done what we thought was right.” He doesn’t wait for a response before leaving, and he doesn’t explain further. His words ring in my head and the more I think about them, the more I think of how odd it is for him to say something like that.

  ​I throw my head back and stare at the ceiling for a moment. His words are strange and a bit confusing, but then I remember that he is here. He came here with Alec. Neither of them are fighting. Alec hugged me. Maddox missed me. We are all together in Callan’s house. Things are going to be okay. I just know it.

  CHAPTER 15

  Maddox

  ​I sit on a wooden bench under the circular gazebo that sits in the backyard. The yard is small but covered in trees and plants of different sorts. It’s like a small jungle back here, and I’m half expecting to get attacked by a monkey or a fucking lion. It’s surprisingly peaceful otherwise. I’d bet my left nut that Callan knows the name of each and every plant back here, along with its favorite drink. Callan’s view on life is opposite of mine. It’s one of the reasons we fit together so well. He’s gentle where I’m rough. He’s sees the beauty in things, I see the ugly. It’s a nice change, sitting back here. It really opens my eyes to the world. And in this moment, I decide that I’m going to visit Callan more often.

  ​Lenny sits across from me, looking everywhere but at me. He looks scared and sad and it breaks my fucking heart to see him like this. It breaks my heart even more knowing that what I’m about to tell him will probably kill that last bit of light that he’s holding on to.

  ​But I have to do it. It’s only right. I pull out a cigarette, bring it to my lips and light it. I’ve lost track of how many I’ve had since being out here, but it’s definitely too many. I’ve been trying to quit, but times like this make it nearly impossible.

  ​Aside from Lenny being upset, I know Callan will be furious, too. Possibly Friday, though maybe not, since she’s Switzerland. She sees everyone’s sides when it comes to disagreements, even though she can be a little stubborn thing herself. When it comes to us, she’s always fair, and always worried about being fair. But Callan, he’s definitely going to be pissed.

  ​“I haven’t talked to her. And I want you to know that I didn’t seek her out. She found me. Social media.” He shrugs his shoulders, his voice is small, which disappoints me. He’s better than this.

  ​I look up to meet Lenny’s reddened, swollen eyes staring at me and I want nothing more than to pull him to me and make everything right. Like I’ve done for him his entire life – or, what I’ve tried to do. Just fucking fix it. Problem is, this problem can’t be fixed with money. I think of the man he is today, and I couldn’t be more proud and more in love with him. Yes, in love. Because that’s what it is. What it’s always been. Lenny and I have always had this connection to one another that is more than just the normal thing. Deeper. I’ve been an ass in not wanting to admit it, because that’s just who I am, but I need to admit it. I need to let it out there. I can’t keep hurting others because I’m afraid of getting hurt myself. I know that now.

  ​“I need to tell you something, Lenny. Something that you aren’t going to be happy about.” Dread takes over his face and I know what he’s thinking. “Relax, I’m not leaving. Though I’m not so sure you will want to stay after I tell you.” The last bit comes out quietly, because I almost can’t bring myself to say it. This will be the hardest thing that I’ve ever had to do. I make my decisions; I do what I need to do. Normally, I don’t defend myself or admit if a decision is wrong. I know, for a fact, that it’s the right thing to do. Except for this. This is the one and only thing that has weighed on my mind for years. I need to get it off my chest. This is Lenny’s choice, and it should have been Lenny’s choice from the beginning. He’s a smart kid, he always has been. How do I know that he wouldn’t have chosen me from the beginning? I don’t, and I took that choice away from him and he will never get it back.

  ​Lenny has always had that need to fit in and to be wanted. It’s why he requires so much attention. He relies on it. I know it’s because of the issues with his mom and him thinking that she didn’t want him, and really I guess she didn’t. Not the way a mother should want her son.

  He’s not good at being alone. I look into his eyes. His crystal blue eyes that look exactly the same as they did that first day I met him. It was before his mom left. Maybe a few months before. We’d seen him around, playing outside in the dirt with his trucks. He watched us for a while, then eventually tried talking to us, but we didn’t pay him any mind. Why would we? He was a baby compared to us. What twelve-year old wants to be seen with a seven-year old? It’s bad enough Alec trudged his little brother around with us everywhere. If only we’d known then, what we know now, I think we’d all have cherished those moments a bit more.

  ​“Before I tell you, I need you to know that I forgive you. In fact, I really don’t have a reason to forgive you. Instead, I’m asking for your forgiveness. For two things. One, for yesterday. I know she’s your mom Lenny, and I can’t honestly say I wouldn’t have done the same. I’m sorry for acting the way I did, it was unfair of me and wrong. Did it hurt? More than you can ever fucking imagine. But I know that’s not why you did it, I know it wasn’t about me. I get that.” I take in a deep breath. “But the second part. I need you to forgive me for something that I did a long time ago, something that I kept from you. Something that I promised myself I would never tell you, but I now know that I need to. Leaving made me realize a lot. It also helped that Alec and I fought out our frustrations, but that is beside the point.” I take the last drag of my cigarette and throw it onto the walkway, not wanting to mar Callan’s beautiful grass.

  ​“Maddox, whatever it is, I will always forgive you. You’ve done more for me than anyone in this entire world and I love you so much for it. I’m grateful for everything.” He tucks a strand of loose hair behind his ear. It’s pulled back into a low ponytail today, which isn’t normal for him.

  ​“I love you too, Lenny. More than you know. There’s no other way to say this, then to just say it.” I take in a deep breath and then let it out. “When you were eight years old, your mom came back for you.” His brow furrows in confusion at my words. His eyes meet mine and recognition takes place of the confusion. I hold his stare, waiting for the anger. Waiting for the screaming. For the punch to my face that I rightfully deserve.

  ​“She–she came back? For me?” His bottom lip trembles, his eyes lost and glistening.

  ​“She came back and she wanted to take you, but I wouldn’t let her. She only would have hurt you again, I was so afraid that she’d take you and leave you somewhere else. Somewhere I wouldn’t be able to save you.” I argue, now defending myself because I need him to know why. Why I made the decision to keep it from him for all these years.

  ​“She came back.” He says under his breath. When he looks at me again, he’s angry and sad and everything that I expected. “And you kept it from me? For all these years, you kept that from me? How–what the fuck?”

  ​“It’s not what you think. She didn’t come back for the right reasons, she came back because… because she needed you.” I run a hand through my hair and stand. “Lenny, fuc
k this is so hard for me to say because no matter what I say I know it’s going to kill you, but I need to just tell you. She was going to sell you. She needed money and she was going to trade you to save her own ass. I know that’s the truth.”

  ​“How do you know that?”

  ​“She told us. That’s exactly what she said. It didn’t take much to get it out of her either. She had no problem admitting to us why she came back. She owed someone money and her payment would have been you. You’d probably be dead, or locked in someone’s basement, chained to a wall and shitting in a bucket.”

  ​He pauses for a moment, his eyes searching mine. “Us?”

  ​Fuck.

  ​“Alec knew. This is what caused him and I to fight so long ago. This is what broke us apart. Because she went to him and promised that she had changed. That she was going to go away with you and keep you safe. Alec believed her and he wanted you to go. But I still couldn’t allow it. I didn’t trust her after what she did the first time, so I made her prove it. I told her to leave and to start a new life somewhere, prove that she was really going to do what she promised, and then and only then would I consider letting you go back to her. Alec thought you should have gone with her the first night she came back.”

  ​“And?”

  ​“And she never came back! I don’t know what happened to her. I thought maybe she’d died. Part of me hoped that she would have come back, a much bigger part hoped that she never would. I didn’t know the right thing to do, all I knew was what I felt. And yeah, I shouldn’t have kept it from you, but I stand by my decision. You’re here, you’re safe and very much alive.”

  ​There is a long silence and part of me thinks that maybe he’s okay with this. Maybe he won’t be as mad at me as I thought. Or maybe he’s so furious that I can’t tell. Years and years of pent up emotion could all be boiling over in this very moment.

  ​“You should have told me.” He’s shaking his head, burying his face in his hands. “You should have fucking told me! You selfish fuck! You know this is the one thing that has fucked me up over and over and over. And you kept that from me? How do you know she didn’t change? She said she would, so maybe she did! She wanted me back and you wouldn’t let her. You let me believe all this time that she just didn’t want me?”

  ​I walk to him and place my hand on his shoulder, he’s seething. He bats my hand away harshly and I let him.

  ​“Alec and I have disagreed on this for seventeen years. We’ve not had a good relationship for that long because of this. Trust me when I say to you that I know I made the right decision.”

  ​“Fuck you, Maddox! Just fuck you!” He screams in my face, towering over me more than he normally would. His hands are clenched by his sides, and I expect him to hit me. I’d let him if he did. I’d let him beat me to a pulp if it made him feel better. But he doesn’t. Instead, he turns and goes inside the house, disappearing through the glass pane door. I hear the bedroom door slam from all the way out here. And I can’t even blame him.

  CHAPTER 16

  Friday

  ​Lenny spends the rest of the day locked away in his room. Maddox fills me in on what happened both outside with Lenny and at his house with Alec. Callan was angry at first, siding with Lenny, but the more he thought about it, the more he felt Maddox did the right thing. I agree. As much as it hurts Lenny, I think Maddox made the right call. Alec stayed silent during the conversation. I can tell in his look that he thinks Maddox ultimately made the right decision, but he doesn’t want to talk about it. If Maddox had chosen differently, we may not have Lenny with us right now. And that’s an awful, awful thought.

  ​I think between the both of them, this is what started their issues. Over the years they’ve held so much against the other that it’s just built up and they never let any of it go. It was anger on top of anger. Not that I agree with them fighting, especially when I was told how bad Maddox’s face was, but I guess they needed it. Boys will be boys, right?

  ​The doorbell rings and I assume it’s the food that we ordered. Callan moves to stand but I hold my hand out, gesturing that I’ll get it. I go to the door and open it. The smell of fried food fills my nostrils and I almost moan in response. I’m starving. The young woman hands me the bags of food and the receipt.

  “S-sign at the bottom, p-please.” Her hands tremble as she waits for the receipt. I sign quickly and hand it over, assuming Callan won’t mind me signing for him. She turns quickly and rushes back to her car that’s half in the driveway and half not.

  ​I carry the bags to the kitchen and lay the containers of Chinese food along the counter and throw the bags away. I take out enough plates for all of us, even Lenny. I yell for the guys to let them know to come make their plates. I’d do it for them, but I’m not sure what they all like. Alec goes upstairs for Lenny. He walks back down a few minutes later shaking his head. Alec said he was lying in bed, and didn’t respond at all, but assured me that he was breathing (whew). He’ll come down when he’s hungry. He’s dealing with so much right now. I tell myself that he is okay, that he needs space. It takes everything in me to not run upstairs and cuddle up with him.

  We pile our plates with food and sit at the dark wooden table in silence as we eat. Halfway through, I start to yawn. After a few more bits I start to feel weak and sluggish. Fried food normally makes me tired, but not like this. I continue to eat because I’m not even close to being full. I push past the need to sleep, telling myself that once I finish my plate, I can go take a nap. Naps are always better with a full belly.

  ​I scoop a spoonful of rice and the spoon falls to the plate with a sharp crack. I look at the guys who aren’t the guys. Well, maybe they are but I can’t see past the blur that is in front of me. They each have two, maybe three heads. I’m not sure I know how to count right now.

  ​“Wha–”

  Lenny

  ​I’m starving. I haven’t had anything since breakfast and even though I told Alec that I didn’t want to eat, I really do. I’m trying to be stubborn, but when it comes to food, I can’t. Being stubborn in general is not in my nature. The constant scent of fried food isn’t helping me. Neither is my stomach growling. It wasn’t long ago that Alec came up here, so if I hurry, there should be some food left. It may even still be warm. I can go downstairs, get my food and come right back up. I don’t have to talk to any of them. If I sneak around, I won’t even have to see them. I roll off the bed and walk down the stairs slowly. I go around the corner, through the living room and straight to the kitchen. Jackpot! There is still loads of food left. My mouth waters at the sight. I pile my plate of food higher than normal. All right, maybe this is normal for me, but that doesn’t really matter.

  ​I decide to go through the dining room, because as much as I want to be mad at Maddox and Alec, I can’t. I mean, I am mad. I’m actually more hurt than anything, but Maddox is mostly right. My anger is towards the wrong person. I should be mad at my mom, she’s the one that fucked up. Maddox always did right be my, all the guys have. They’ve done everything to take care of me and I think I turned out decent. I enter the dining room with a plan to sit at the table with everyone and make amends.

  The plate falls from my hands.

  My breathing stops.

  The blood pounds in my ears.

  My vision blurs around the edges.

  ​“Guys? Guys!” I rush to Maddox, because he’s the closest to me. I shake him, but he doesn’t wake. His head rests on the table, I lift him back by his shoulder and his head lolls to the side. I check his pulse and it’s there, it’s strong. He’s breathing. I rush around the table to check Friday, Callan and then Alec. They are all breathing but out cold. “What the hell is going on?” I ask myself. I take a moment to catch my breath, to collect my thoughts.

  ​The creak of the front door opening has my heart thudding in my chest. My senses heighten as I listened to what I can only assume are footsteps. One set. Okay, that’s a good thing. Only one. I can handle one.
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br />   ​I mumble a quick barrier spell under my breath, creating an invisible barrier from the living room to the dining room. I run back through the kitchen quietly and enter into the living room. I catch the intruder from behind. I look up, up and up. His stature scares the shit out of me. He’s huge, like a bear. Taller than me and more beefed up than Alec. I don’t know what kind of Paranormal this guy is – because that’s definitely what he is – but I’m no match for him. This guy will kick my ass halfway into next week. I have to think quick and use my magic. That’s the only upper hand I have on this guy. As long as he doesn’t have magic, that is. I can assume by his body type that he doesn’t. Most magic folk are smaller, like me. I don’t have long to figure something out. It’ll only be a few seconds before he realizes there is a barrier up.

  ​An ice trap. That’s the only thing I can think of that may hold him long enough for me to find something to tie him up with. I can’t outright fight this guy if I don’t know what his powers are. That’s just stupid. I head back to the kitchen, knowing that once he realizes there is a barrier up, he will have to come this way. I turn around the corner, speaking the spell for the ice trap and place it in front of the door. I wait with my body against the wall, straining my ears for any little sound that will let me know when he’s close.

  ​Ice traps suck. I don’t know firsthand, because I’ve never been in one myself, but all the guys have. Yes, all. Once I figured out how to do it, I’d to catch them all the time. It stopped once I started getting death threats from Alec, but the memories are good. Basically, once you step into it, it feels as if your entire body is submerged into a body of ice water. You can barely move, so it’s beneficial at a time like this. I even my breathing as I wait. It doesn’t take long for the footsteps to move towards this direction.