Charlotte's Tangled Web: L.B. Pavlov

by L B Pavlov

  Blane would try to catch my eye and smile, but I tried to avoid him at all cost. He still continued to text me daily, which I didn’t understand since he and Crystal appeared to be dating, and clearly he had heard about Daniel and I.

  Friday arrived, and I had just finished up practice and was walking to the truck to meet Daniel when I saw him standing by his truck waiting for me. He was literally glistening in the sun. His shirt was wet with sweat and sticking to his strong body. His muscles were more pronounced than ever. His skin was tanned and sparkly. The bottom half of his tattoo peeked out from under the sleeve of his T-shirt. His hair was wavier than usual, probably because it was drenched in sweat. His cheeks were flushed pink, and his lips…I just couldn’t help but stare at them. He had never looked sexier. As I walked toward him, all I could think about was how could this possibly be my boyfriend? When I reached him, he grabbed me and swung me around. I felt a shiver run through my body. He hugged me tightly and set me down. I was breathless. His smoldering green eyes were burning through me.

  “How was practice, beautiful?” he asked sweetly.

  My heart was racing, and I chirped out “good” in a breathless voice.

  He laughed, opened my door, and lifted me into the truck, placing me on the seat like a porcelain doll. Reaching over me, he buckled my seat belt. Just his arm brushing across my body caused me to shiver. He jumped in the driver’s side and started up the truck. We were on our way home.

  “Are you ready for the race tomorrow?” he asked, smiling at me.

  “Daniel, please pull over right now,” I said urgently.

  “What? Are you OK?” he asked nervously as he immediately pulled over and put the truck in park. “What’s wrong? Did something happen?” he continued with concern in his voice.

  Without warning, I sprang into his lap, imbedded both of my hands in his tangled hair, and pulled his lips to mine. I was madly and deeply in love with him, and I needed to feel his lips against mine right then. We were panting, and his hands were adventuring as well. They traveled down my hair, to my ears, to the back of my neck, and down my back, rubbing and caressing me. Our tongues became one once again, as they twisted and turned to be closer.

  He gently pulled me back; he was breathless now too. “What was that for?” he asked with a flirtatious smile.

  “I’m sorry. I couldn’t wait any longer. I couldn’t sit here next to you for one more minute,” I said shamelessly.

  “Never say sorry for wanting to kiss me, Charlotte. It’s the best gift you can give me. I could never kiss you enough. I just don’t want to push things too much for you. Your virtue is as important to me as it is to you.” He chuckled, and continued, “I am practicing self-control every minute that I’m with you,” he said, and I blushed. He quickly kissed me again and said, “Now let’s get you home and load you up with pasta.”

  As we ate dinner, he inquired about what teams I would be racing tomorrow and what time we needed to be there. I told him there were a bunch of girls that were really good that I would be racing, but our team definitely had a chance to get first if everyone ran a good race. Daniel knew most of the cross-country courses because he had been going to my races for years. He told me where he would stand on the course to cheer me on.

  “Now, Charlotte, I want you to stay focused. Don’t tackle me and try to kiss me when you pass me on the course,” he said, teasing.

  Daniel knew how I was during races. I took it seriously, and I always remained focused until the race was over. He loved to razz me about it.

  “When do your brothers get home?” I could hear the excitement in his voice.

  “They said they would be here around nine or ten tonight,” I said happily.

  I would be going with my team to the race, and Daniel, Jack, Eric, James, Lenora, Grace, Tom, and my dad would all come together. I always had a great support system with my two families cheering me on.

  “OK, sweet Charlotte. You need to get to bed early,” he declared, and he pulled me into his arms and carried me up the stairs.

  I could feel my heart racing with contentment. He set me down on my bed, and he kissed me on the top of my head. “I love you. I’ll see you in the morning,” he said and smiled at me.

  “I love you too. Good-night,” I replied.

  The next morning, I rode the bus with our team. Everyone was excited. I sat with Steph and Kathleen as we drove to the host school. There were going to be thirteen schools at this invitational, so there would be a couple hundred runners in the boys and girls race. These always made me more nervous. You had to get out quickly so you didn’t get tripped, elbowed, boxed in, or caught behind a group that you couldn’t get around.

  Cross-country was not on a track; it was an off-road race with turns and hills and unexpected holes in the ground. You always need to pay attention to the course and to the other runners. I liked to take my time on the warm-up to relax my mind and visualize my plan. This was a time when most people were talking and laughing and getting excited.

  My teammates were used to me being quiet before races, so no one questioned me while we went through our pre-race ritual: warm-up, stretch, stride outs, and head to the line. Coach Miroballi always gave me a game plan to follow, and I fully trusted him and did what he told me.

  I never talked to Daniel and my family before a race, but Daniel always met me at the finish line with a water or Gatorade. My brothers liked to spread out all over the course and, although I couldn’t laugh about it during the race, I always teased them afterward about the cheering and screaming.

  I was on the line. Each team lined up in their team box. There were around three hundred girls in the race. My heart was pounding, but I was ready. When you train hard, you want to perform.

  Mr. St. John, the head of the NIAA cross-country program for our region, was on the loudspeaker and held the starting gun. “Ladies, don’t jump the gun, and let’s make it a clean race,” he said. “Take your mark, set…” Bang! And we were off and running.

  As soon as the gun went off, calm descended over me. I comforted myself by imagining it was my mom watching over me. I hoped that were true. The first half-mile of a 3.1-mile race is always clustered with a mixture of experienced runners and young runners who are fueled by adrenaline and burn out very quickly. I was out in the front and followed by a pack of about fifteen runners, while the rest of the pack filed in behind us.

  As I made the first turn at the half-mile mark, I felt the pack drop down to maybe five or six girls who were sticking with me, but by the time I hit the mile mark, I was alone. Now it would be me racing the clock, pushing myself to get the time that I had trained to run. Along the way, I heard Coach Miroballi telling me that I was on pace, and when he told me to surge, I listened. He knew my capabilities better than I did most of the time. I heard Daniel, my family, Lenora, Tom, and Grace shout encouraging words as I ran by.

  I always heard my mother’s voice during races as well, telling me how proud she was of me, and I think that was why I loved running so much. It felt like I was with my mom in a way. As I came down the final stretch, the crowd was screaming and cheering me on, and it always encouraged me to finish strong.

  As soon as I came through the chute, I looked back and was surprised by how much of a lead I had. I was not expecting that. I was always prepared for someone to be right next to me, and I never fooled myself into believing that I was unbeatable. I came through the chute and right to Daniel, who was holding a Gatorade and wearing a grin.

  “You are amazing,” he said bluntly.

  I laughed and led him back to the final stretch of the course so that I could cheer on my teammates. Steph and Kathleen finished strong in seventh and tenth place, and Lexi and Sydney were not far behind, rounding out our top five. We definitely had a shot to win this meet, and I was thrilled. It was a great start to the season.

  We had a big barbeque at my house that night, and the Hollingsworths came, along with Kathleen and Edward, Steph and her boyfriend Jaco
b, plus my family. It was lots of fun. We played football in the backyard and had a great night.

  Everyone had gone home except Daniel. He and my brothers wanted to play some pool and ventured off to the game room. I helped Lenora clean the kitchen, and then I went to find my dad. I heard him on the phone in his office, and it sounded like he was having an intense conversation with someone.

  When he saw me walk in, he immediately ended the phone call abruptly.

  “Hey, Dad,” I said quietly.

  “Hey, sweetie, how are you feeling? You ran a great race today. Your mom would have been proud,” he said with a bittersweet tone to his voice.

  My dad had never seemed to get past his sadness over losing my mom. Through reading her journals over and over, I learned that my dad used to be an outgoing and funny guy. He was definitely more serious since Mom had passed, and he didn’t seem to enjoy life most of the time. I had asked him on many occasions if he would like to read her journals because I had hoped he could find some closure through them. He always declined. He said it would be too difficult.

  “Is everything OK, Dad?” I asked, concerned. “That sounded like a serious phone call.”

  “Everything is fine, sweetheart. Nothing for you to worry about, OK?” he said comfortingly.

  “Sure, Dad. You know, um, if you ever wanted to start dating, it wouldn’t bother me at all,” I said cautiously.

  My dad looked at me with utter surprise on his face. “Well, thanks, sweetie. I’m good. But I have noticed a change between you and Daniel,” he said, changing the subject.

  I felt my face flush at the unexpected comment. “Oh, um, yes, Daniel and I are more than friends. I love him, Dad,” I said nervously, but I was also relieved to get it out there.

  “I know, honey, but remember, boyfriends can be distracting, especially one that you are already unusually close to. Just be careful. We don’t need anything to take us off our course, you know?” he said firmly.

  “Right, Dad. Nothing will take me off of ‘our course,’ so not to worry,” I retorted with a chill in my voice that even I hadn’t expected. It just would have been nice for my dad to be happy for me. For the first time in my life, I had everything that I had always wanted. But instead, Dad had to make it about running and staying “on course.” That annoyed me, and he could tell.

  “Honey, I am happy for you, and you know I think of Daniel as one of my own sons. But, when it comes to dating my daughter, it changes things. Daniel has…” he paused and then continued, “lived quite a bit more than you have. I don’t want him to, um, how can I say this…” he paused again, “introduce you to things that you aren’t ready for.”

  “What does that mean?” I snapped at him, angry now.

  “Charlotte, you are young. Trust me on this. Love makes people do things without thinking about the consequences,” he said cautiously. “I have personal experience with this.”

  “Dad, please be happy for me. This has nothing to do with my running, or my future, or Stanford. I am just happy right now. Can’t you be happy for me about something other than ‘staying on course’?” I said bitterly.

  I could see that I had hurt him. I felt bad for that, but I needed him to understand my life wasn’t just about running and college.

  “Charlotte, I’m sorry that you can’t understand this. I am happy for you. I just want you to have a bright future. You have to trust that I know what’s best for you sometimes better than you know yourself,” he said in a way that let me know he was done with this conversation.

  “Good-night, Dad,” I said coldly and walked away.

  I went and joined Daniel and my brothers in the game room. They were all playing pool and laughing. Jack teased me as I entered the room, “Is Dad giving you a hard time about having a boyfriend, Charlie?”

  Daniel playfully grabbed him from behind to make him stop harassing me, and they laughed and wrestled around.

  Eric felt the need to jump in now. “Little Charlie and little, well, um, big Daniel, how cute.” Everyone started laughing with the exception of me.

  I plopped down on the couch and ignored them. They continued playing pool, and Daniel came over to sit with me. He could tell that something was wrong. “Is your dad upset that we are together?” he asked concerned.

  “I wouldn’t say he is upset. He is worried that it will affect my future and Stanford, who knows what,” I said rolling my eyes.

  “Well, he loves you, Charlotte. I can understand that.” He winked at me.

  “He said that you have lived more than me, as if you were going to corrupt me or something crazy and judgmental,” I said angrily.

  I saw him wince, and he put his hand on my shoulder. “Charlotte, your dad is right. I am not the virtuous person that you are.” He smiled sincerely and continued, “I have, um, been with more girls than I want to say, and I’m certainly far from perfect. I have been drunk, and I have been stupid. I have done things that I wish I could take back now that I’m with you. But I can’t. But I am trying to be the person that you deserve me to be now. But I understand his concerns. I will just have to prove him wrong,” he said, his eyes blazing into mine.

  “Daniel, no one is perfect. I know you’ve done things that I haven’t, but that doesn’t make you a bad person. We weren’t dating then. You are everything that I want, now and forever. Exactly as you are,” I said quietly so that only he could hear, and our hands intertwined.

  My cell phone vibrated right at that moment. I looked down and saw it was the ever-annoying Blane. Daniel looked down at my phone too. I could see his face twitch when he saw whom it was from. I had told him that Blane had texted me a few times, but I didn’t tell him every time because I knew it bothered him.

  “Why does he keep texting you? What the hell does he want?” he said angrily.

  “I don’t know. I have never responded, and I haven’t spoken to him since the party,” I said, puzzled.

  “What’s the matter over here?” James asked as he plopped down next to me on the couch. “Are we having a lovers quarrel?” he said, laughing.

  “Some douche bag that won’t quit texting your sister,” Daniel said, annoyed.

  “Maybe it’s time that you get involved, Daniel, and have a little chat with him.” Jack said seriously.

  “Oh, trust me, I want to bust his face open, but your sister made me promise I would stay away from him. I am trying to be respectful,” he said, and he and Jack burst out laughing.

  “Daniel is trying to be respectful! You are a changed man!” Jack exclaimed, and they laughed some more.

  “Blane is on the football team. Daniel is the captain of his team, and he doesn’t need to waste his time or get in trouble over some idiot,” I said defensively.

  “Oh no, his name is Blane?” Eric shouted. “I prefer douche bag to Blane.” We all laughed at that.

  “Can we please stop talking about this?” I pleaded.

  They went back to playing pool, but I could tell Daniel was concerned about both my dad and now Blane.

  The next few weeks were busy, and the days passed quickly. Daniel had led his team to an undefeated season so far, and it looked like they would be going to state and had a shot at the state title. The Notre Dame coach had come to several games to watch Daniel, and they had already verbally offered Daniel a four-year, full-ride scholarship. He would sign at the end of the season.

  I was so proud of him. I loved to watch him play. He became sexier each day. I loved spending every free minute with him, holding hands, kissing, talking, and laughing.

  He had managed to stay away from Blane, with the exception of telling Blane to quit texting me. He claimed it was a direct conversation and that there was no argument involved, but for some reason I had a hard time believing that. They had to see each other at practice, but Blane sat the bench most of the time, so they didn’t have to interact a ton.

  Blane continued to text me a few times, and I just deleted them. I didn’t want to upset Daniel by telling him ab
out the texts. Daniel did not need to waste his time worrying about this. I knew that I could handle it.

  I was racing a lot and continued to have a great season as well. I was so happy that my team was doing well also. We had only lost to two teams all season, and we had a shot to make it to state as a team.

  Katrina George had done a big interview with the Indiana Review Journal in which she stated, “Charlotte Ford is a ‘has been.’ She has all this hype behind her with nothing to back it up. She doesn’t run with the fierceness that I do, and she better be ready to lose her title come November.”

  Daniel and my dad were furious, but I just sort of laughed it off. This wasn’t the first time she had tried to intimidate me. She was running similar times to mine, and she wanted to win. I knew that beating Katrina would be no easy task. When I was asked by the Review Journal to respond to Katrina’s comments, I simply said, “Katrina is a great runner, and I wish her well.”

  Coach Miroballi said I handled it with class, but I don’t think either Dad or Daniel was happy with my response. However, I was not about to have a public fight that got played out in the press. That was what Katrina wanted me to do.

  The coach from Stanford would be flying out to the Indiana state meet to watch me race. He had come to the state meet my junior year too, and we had a verbal agreement that I would attend Stanford in the fall after graduation. I wouldn’t sign with them until the season had ended. I had other coaches that had come to see me race this year, but my dad wouldn’t consider any other schools that were interested in recruiting me. I was more than aware that Stanford was an awesome school. Stanford had an incredible distance coach and very impressive cross-country and track teams—not to mention the education that I would receive. My mother had attended Stanford, and in every way it was amazing to be receiving a full-ride scholarship from them. I was thrilled that they wanted me. It just bothered me that I didn’t seem to have a choice in the matter.

  Daniel and I had made an agreement regarding the homecoming dance. Daniel had wanted to take me because I had never gone to a school dance. I was dreading it. I didn’t like dress shopping, I didn’t know how to dance, and I had never felt that I had missed out on anything by not attending. We had agreed to compromise: I would go to the senior prom with him, and he would drop the homecoming topic. Daniel had attended every school dance with different girls every time. He said he didn’t particularly like dances either, but he wouldn’t let me miss out on any high school experiences. He also said that if he were going to prom with me, he would certainly have a great time.