Charm School Christmas Karma: A Steamy Holiday Romance

by Lynn Carmer

  Working from home has its perks.

  “…the first annual charm school charity auction. I see a lot of familiar faces, and I couldn’t be happier that you all showed up to help. I’m going to keep this brief. We have a host of gorgeous men who are offering all kinds of packages to bid on,” Dacey said.

  “They have some nice packages, all right!” Tammy and Doc Christina, charm school regulars, whooped it up and high-fived each other.

  “You’re so right! We have the best packages in town. Right here on this stage.” Dacey winked. “I hope you’ve had a moment to think about who you want to bid on. Most of the single guys are auctioning off themselves, as in a super romantic date, but the others offer different services.”

  “They better.”

  “No, Mrs. Wong. You’re so bad. Not those kinds of services. All of the married, or taken men, will auction everything off besides their hot bodies. But just because you’ve already eaten, doesn’t mean you can’t look at the menu. Am I, right?”

  The crowd jumped to their feet.

  Dacey blew kisses. “This is so much fun. Are the guys all set?” she called off to the side of the stage. “Okey dokey. Then let’s get this party started, right.’”

  “First up, we have Frank, a local fire fighter. He’s recently separated and looking for Ms. or—am I reading this right—Mr. Right? Nice. I didn’t know you rolled like that Frank. Makes him even sexier, doesn’t it?” The crowd broke into applause. Baritone hallelujahs cheered their agreement.

  Ai felt a soft tap on her shoulder. She looked up and a genuine smile split her face. “Hey, Brynn.”

  “Ai! I can’t believe Dacey talked you into coming. There were two people I thought would boycott.” Brynn, Dacey’s sister, hugged her from behind. “Guess who the second person was?” She hiked her thumb over her shoulder and gave Ren a quick kiss on the cheek.

  Ai spotted Athena, the oldest Calvo Quad, with a bowl of popcorn in her hands.

  “You guys made it in time. The hunks are coming out.” Ren hugged Brynn and Athena as they plopped down in their seats.

  “Sorry. I got detained, and I’m Athena’s ride, so it’s all my fault.” Brynn twisted the pale gold ring on her finger.

  “I hope everything’s okay.” Ren gave her wig the slightest tug.

  “Okay?” Athena snorted shoveling air-popped, organic popcorn into her mouth. “She was postboned.”

  “What?” Ren asked. “You mean postponed?”

  Ai began to laugh, anticipating Athena’s answer.

  “Nope. I meant she was postboned because she was doing the dirty deed with Alexei. Again.” Athena grinned and ate more.

  “I wish.” A bright red stain spread over Brynn’s cheeks and neck.

  Ai tried to grab some popcorn but Athena batted her hand away. “Hey!”

  “Hey, nothing. Mine.”

  Ai grumbled but decided to let the pregnant lady eat her snack. “How are you feeling?”

  “Huge. Look at these ankles.” She propped her legs up on Brynn’s lap. Her long legs looked perfect, but her pregnant belly did look enormous. “I think it might be a fifteen pounder.”

  “Ssh,” a woman whispered behind them.

  Ai narrowed her gaze and beckoned the woman closer. “Shush me again. Do it, and see what happens.” She cocked her brow and waited until the woman reared back and looked away.

  “Nice. That deserves a treat.” Athena offered Ai some popcorn.

  Dacey’s voiced boomed back into focus. “Look at this hot tamale.” Dacey announced. “This is Theo. And let me just say, ‘You’re welcome,’ ahead of time.”

  The crowd jumped to their feet, Ren the first one up.

  Ai reluctantly stood to get a better look. “Who’s Theo?”

  “The Cuban,” Athena muttered and shoved popcorn in her mouth.

  “Aah, your Cuban. The one you’ve been drooling over.”

  “I’m off men, remember?” Ren’s sunny face clouded over.

  A decent person would ask her why…so nah, I’ll pass.

  Dacey boomed from the stage. “He’s an avid gamer, spending many a lonely night playing Clash of Clans or Halo. He was also devastated when Game of Thrones ended.” Dacey stopped reading and glared at him, “Really? After that ending? We’ll talk later.”

  “Oh my God, he’s such a nerd.” Ren moaned and bit her forefinger.

  “That’s bad, right?” Ai asked, unsure of what the hell was happening to Ren’s face. “What’s wrong with her?” She looked at Brynn who shrugged.

  Ren moaned, “I’m a nerd, too. And I love beards. And I especially love hot nerds with sexy beards and scowly eyebrows. He’s perfect,” she whispered.

  “Let’s get the bidding started. I’ll start with one hundred dollars!” Dacey announced.

  Ai decided he might deserve a second look. Shaved head, short beard and, yes, definitely scowly brows, he stomped down the aisle in a wide stance. He didn’t walk, he dominated, mad-dogging anyone who made eye contact.

  “I hate to break it to you, Ren. He’s more than your average nerd. He tested at genius level but refused to join MENSA, he skipped a grade in school, and he had a full ride to MIT. Then…well, life sort of got in the way.” Brynn smiled, clearly much more amenable to the Cuban than in past.

  “And he won’t stop asking me for your number. Even when I told him you said no,” Athena said.

  Ren’s eyes went wide, drinking him in, soaking him up like he was the gravy to her biscuit. Her hand looked twitchy, as if she wanted to put in a bid.

  “Last chance. Mrs. Wong only bids one dollar after each go around, so she’s ready to fork over two-hundred and one dollars. Going, going…”

  “Five hundred!” This came from a pretty, red-head toward the middle of the group.

  The audience gasped, all eyes on Mrs. Wong to see if she would bid the extra dollar. She shook her head, and the crowd exploded.

  “Sold to the mystery ginger!”

  Ren slumped back in her seat, looking both devastated and kind of pissed.

  “Next up on the schedule, we have the Handsome Devil. Willem? What?” Dacey’s face lit up. “You changed your mind? Oh, my Lanta, you guys are in for a real treat. I might be a little biased, but I promise he is the most generous, handsome—

  Someone rushed the stage and shoved a note in Dacey’s face. She read it quickly and glared at the side of the stage. “Really, babe?” She huffed and continued, “I have been instructed to read a note from Willem Bartholomew Charles who suddenly was unable to walk tonight. It reads, ‘No matter how hard your sister tries, I will pay for this school ten times over because there is no way in hell, I will ever walk the runway, nor will I spend a minute of my time with those screeching hens. I only want you.”

  The crowd gasped.

  “I know, right?” Dacey placed a hand against her chest. “I was pissed until that last line. So sweet. I love you, too.”

  The throng’s excitement dimmed as they soaked in the insult.

  “God, he is such an asshole. What my sister sees in him, is beyond me.” Athena munched.

  Brynn giggled uncontrollably. She’d gotten better, but curse words still hit her funny bone, most times.

  Respect for the Handsome Devil, Ai thought. She got it. She wanted nothing to do with most of these people, either. Her high bun slumped for the thousandth time, her bone straight hair never cooperating. She readjusted it into a messy bun.

  “Where’s Alexei?” Ren asked Brynn.

  “Over there.” Brynn sat up and hugged her clasped hands to her chest. “My man steals my breath. Even when he drives me crazy.” She pointed to the side of the stage, where he quietly spoke to one of the contestants.

  Hard to argue with that. Dark hair from his Korean grandfather, cinnamon skin from his Mexican grandmother, and midnight eyes from his Russian father. It was the perfect recipe for, “Sex on a Stick.”

  “I would ask about trouble in paradise, but since you were postboned, I would assu
me not,” Ai said.

  “We weren’t boning,” Brynn didn’t giggle this time as she adjusted her dark glasses. “It’s just…Alexei isn’t good with change, and there’s been a lot going on around here.”

  “Get ready for this one. I know it’s going to be our best seller.” Dacey swept her hand out in a grand manner.

  Out walked an elderly couple and the crowd roared. Ms. Scarlett looked resplendent, decked out in her favorite color, pink, from her candy-cane hair down to her ruby slippers. While her ninety-something year old boyfriend, Old Henry, dutifully shuffled next to her. Ms. Scarlett was infamous around town, and one of the original members of Ms. Belle’s posse, the Ladies that Lunch. They still helped around the school, volunteering and meddling whenever they could.

  Ms. Scarlett blew kisses and took the microphone from Dacey’s hand. “May I introduce my gentleman caller, Henry O’Henry. He is quite spry, a true gentleman, and a champ between the sheets. If I may, I’d love to tell you a story about Henry and myself. We were travelling, and I don’t think many of you may have heard of this, but did you know about the Mile-High Club? Well, Henry and I had no idea…”

  Dacey bent at the waist, laughing uncontrollably.

  “Of course, once I told Henry all about it, he insisted we become mem—”

  “No, no, nooo!” Caelen Calvo, the missing Calvo Quad, ran faster than Ai would have thought possible in stripper heels. She burst from behind the curtain and wrestled the microphone from Ms. Scarlett’s hand. “Thank you, Ms. Scarlett. What a lovely story.” She blew her dark hair out of her face. “But we’re on a tight schedule and have to get back to the charity. Maybe another time,” she finished weakly.

  She covered the microphone with her hand and berated Dacey until she stopped laughing.

  It took another five minutes for the crowd to settle. Most people were still chuckling and wiping tears from their eyes. Even Mrs. Wong, their old chemistry teacher, wore a small smile instead of her usual furrowed brow.

  Ai squirmed in her seat, and a sense of urgency gripped her. Sebastian was next. She knew it. I have to get out of here. The back gate marked Exit wasn’t too far away.

  “Sergeant Sebastian Jacobs, one of Sierra Madre’s finest police officers…”

  Oh shit, here comes the Po Po.

  “He describes himself as a Jexan, a nice Jewish boy from Texas. He lives and breathes the Dallas Cowboys, and is still hoping for that sixth championship.”

  Gross. Hate football. She tried to hold onto that fact with both hands, creating distance yet waiting desperately to catch her first glimpse of him.

  “… but before the Sunday games begin, he always calls his mother, to tell her he loves her.”

  I love a mama’s boy. Dagnabbit!

  Sebastian showed up in his dress blues and Ai melted. He took off his hat and looked intently at the crowd, clearly in cop mode. Broad shoulders. Trim waist. Defined but lean, not overly bulky. Marching over the walkway, he never rushed, scorching the stage in a slow burn. It made her thighs tighten. She imagined how thoroughly he would devour her body, if she ever gave him the chance.

  Hands went up at a rapid rate, so fast Ai couldn’t keep track. Not that she planned to take her eyes off of him.

  “We are up to three hundred dollars. Dig deep. Remember folks, Sergeant Jacobs promised a surprise package. Anyone who loves an adventure needs to snatch him up.”

  Sebastian pivoted, his back ramrod stiff, his stony face in profile. The softest part of his features were those wide lips. Sweet, luscious…

  “Come on. He’s our last bid. We have five hundred bucks so far. Let me hear six. Going once…”

  He stopped right in front of her. Ai’s breath caught, and she drowned in a sea of blue.

  “Going twice…”

  Ai wished he were closer. She leaned forward, to get a better view, to catch a whiff of his masculine scent…Their eyes met. He can see me? Instant connection. The feel of his piercing gaze roaming her face, devouring her—

  Ren elbowed her and jostled her haphazard bun.

  Ai mourned the loss of his heated stare, and she lifted her hands to fix her hair. The stupid brochure almost slipped from her hands as she tightened the rubber band.

  Dacey screamed, “We have a bid for six hundred!”

  Ai’s gaze snapped up and she looked around the crowd, ready to scratch the lucky woman’s eyes out. But all she saw was Dacey, jumping around the stage and pointing at her.

  “Sold to Ai Zhao for six hundred dollars.” The crowd applauded and turned toward her.

  All eyes. On her. At once.

  I did not. I did not bid. But the air froze in her lungs. She jumped up, but she couldn’t breathe. Couldn’t speak. The fire burning in his eyes, seared her in place.

  “Way to go, Ai.” Brynn clapped.

  “So much for being off men, huh?” Ren cackled.

  “I don’t blame you. He looks pretty damn good. Nothing compared to my Tommy, but decent.” Athena spoke through a mouthful of popcorn.

  Chapter 3

  ‡

  Sebastian Jacobs held himself stiff, flabbergasted that the most beautiful woman he’d ever seen, had bid on him. The roar of the crowd faded away, Dacey’s lilting voice a distant memory.

  Ai. The fierce artist who haunted his dreams. They’d met one night through Dacey, and he’d asked her out, every day, for a month. He’d finally taken the hint and stopped asking. But no matter how many times he dated, put himself out there, his thoughts strayed back to her.

  She bid. On me.

  All he saw was Ai’s mutinous face. With anyone else, that would be cause for alarm, but Ai looked like that most times. She possessed zero patience for most people. Except for her precious few. The family and friends close to her heart. People like Dacey, the Quads, and her artist community. With them, she relaxed and could be so damn caring, it made his chest ache. He wanted to be one of her people.

  She stood with her fists balled, her delicate features highlighted by the bright lights. Sharp cheekbones, full lips, and her eyes…midnight sparks. His body tensed, so taut, he couldn’t breathe.

  “No.” She pointed at Dacey. “I did not bid.” Ai balled her fists, the dark wave of her hair cascading down her back, no longer in a bun.

  Reality returned with a thud. The crowd quieted and he stood frozen, trying to catch her eye, but she stared at Dacey instead, refusing to look at him.

  “Yes, you did.”

  “I did—

  “All bids are final,” Dacey decreed.

  “I was fixing my hair. I didn’t—”

  “Your hand was in the air.”

  Holy shit. Is this happening? He liked Ai, but he was no punk. This was torture. Right before he was about to spin around and take off, Dacey said, “Fine. Look at that beautiful man, and tell him you don’t want to go out.”

  Ai’s gaze returned to his, and the magic from before intensified. He saw determination in her fierce expression. He ran his eyes over her straight nose and stubborn chin. The contrast between her golden skin and coral lips melted his stony countenance.

  Ai bit her lip. “I…”

  He waited, patiently, knowing that if she said no, that any chance, any spark, would be extinguished. No fledgling trace of desire could survive a public humiliation like this one. He crossed his arms and dared her, challenging her to say no.

  A few of the other guys, Theo, Alexei, and shuffling Old Henry, stood behind him. In silent support.

  Say yes, damn it.

  Her expression softened for the briefest of seconds. “Fine! I’ll go.”

  Sebastian blinked and looked to Theo for confirmation. “She didn’t say no?”

  “That means yes!” Theo raised a fist in the air, and the crowd went wild.

  Sebastian couldn’t hide his goofy grin. It felt like it split his face in half. Each of the guys pounded on his back, jostling him. Old Henry held out a weathered hand for an old school handshake. They were all so exuberant. He lo
st Ai in the chaos. Sebastian was ushered offstage before he could catch another glimpse.

  “Way to go, man.” Dare Lagos, hometown hero, was dressed in a Santa suit, if ‘Ole Saint Nick was moonlighting as a stripper. Dare adjusted the over-sized black belt and grimaced. “Ai is the best. Cranky as hell, but good people.”

  “You’re next, right?” Sebastian was pumped but he never could turn off his Spidey sense. It made him a good cop but a nosy friend. “You nervous about going out there?”

  “Who me? I was made for the stage.” Dare rolled his shoulders. “Just going to fundamentally change the course of my life, but nothing you need to worry about.

  “What?”

  “Babe, you look awesome.” Caelen rushed over, one of the notorious Calvo Quads, and official owner of the school. With clip board in hand, she planted a wet kiss on Dare’s lips. “This costume was genius, if I do say so myself.”

  Dare gripped her waist and pulled her close. “You’re going to owe me big-time. Huge.”

  “I will. I promise. I found some old notes on the class I taught,” she squealed when he tugged her in and nuzzled her neck, “it’ll blow your mind.” She pushed him toward the stage. “Get out there. You’re on.”

  “Only if you promise to watch the whole time.”

  “Yeah, but…”

  He palmed the back of her neck and waited to snare her full attention. “Promise me.”

  She kissed him fiercely. “I promise.”

  Sebastian cleared his throat, trying to look anywhere but at the happy couple. Had to admit it made his chest a little tight. Not every day you see a couple so in love. But he didn’t need to see it this up close and personal.

  “I’ll see you out there.”

  Caelen and Sebastian watched Dare from backstage.

  “This is it.” Dacey paced the stage, riling up the crowd. “We’re closing the night out with someone near and dear to all of our hearts. He is a fire-fighter—a hot shot, and he risks his life to keep us safe. Every. Single. Day. What you didn’t know? He has a seasonal job. May I introduce to you…”