Chasing the Runaway Bride (Bliss Series Book 3)
Page 11
Gerard choked on the drink he’d just sipped. “I’m sorry.” His eyes watered. “Did you say Chastity?”
Here we go.
“Oh yes, Chastity,” my mother proudly said, “I named her myself.”
I gave Gerard a look that said I’d take the ice from his glass, shape it into a shiv and jab it in his eyeball if he didn’t stop snickering. But he ignored it, grabbing my mother’s hand, and placing it over his large arm. “Tell me more, mother dear, tell me more.” Naturally, my mother swooned.
Mateo shrugged, a silent apology, and followed my mother and Gerard. I emptied my glass and walked over to the makeshift bar. As I dropped in a couple of ice cubes and a good three fingers of scotch, I watched the interactions happening in the room. My past had collided with my present. It felt surreal.
On the sofa, Levi and Nica chatted with Danny. A few words filtered toward me from their conversations, such as ‘investment properties’, ‘profit margins’, ‘brand identity’, so needless to say they were talking business. My father was delightedly surrounded by Jewel and the assistants around the kitchen island. His hands flew everywhere as he described the mischievous little girl I had been.
As I sipped my drink, I wondered if my life wouldn’t have been as bad as I thought it would if I’d been honest from the beginning. Now my past was revealed, and my friends and coworkers were very accepting. Okay, my friends were accepting; the assistants were afraid of me but they would gladly listen to any tidbit they could use later on to blackmail me. I would have done the same.
My past and present didn’t collide. They smoothly fitted into each other. Yet, I couldn’t ignore the deep ache in my heart. And I knew why.
Alex.
I missed him.
Even if I could figure out a way for him to fit into my life, I wasn’t sure he would want to, not by the way he had reacted the other night. I stupidly retrieved and read all of Alex’s texts last night, and it crushed me. I tried not to read between the lines, but the words, which I had initially ignored, were flashing like Vegas lights. Alex had wanted to be with me. He had been trying to get me involved in more than just a sexual relationship all this time. Now, my moment with him was up. End of the line for me. He wasn’t someone who gave second chances.
And I still had to figure out Danny.
I refilled my glass and chugged the contents. The ice clinked against the crystal tumbler as my hands shook. My chest constricted. I forced out a ragged breath and tried to take in a soothing breath of air. It wasn’t happening. I had to get out or I would faint.
The steps I took toward the front door weren’t rushed. I tried to appear calm to whoever was paying attention, which was probably nobody, as they were all too busy getting acquainted with each other.
As soon as the cool night air hit my face, my eyes welled up. I cursed myself for being such a pansy. I hadn’t cried this much since leaving Vermont, and I’d had more valid reasons to cry back then. What was going on with me? Did Alex mean more to me than I’d like to admit? And now that we couldn’t be together, I was acting all broken-hearted?
I sucked in a shaky breath and swiped at the tears rolling down my cheeks. There was no running away from this. My father was terminally ill. I wouldn’t find any way to forgive myself if I didn’t go back to Vermont with him, and be by his side while he went through harrowing procedures. I patted my eyes dry and prepared to walk back in when someone on a motorcycle stopped in front of my house. I knew it was Alex before he even took off the dark helmet.
Grateful I had just ceased freaking out over the loss of what we could have had, I calmly climbed down the steps to see what brought him.
Thoughts of hope and reconciliation burst within me.
I almost tripped over my own feet before I reached him. He looked damned sexy on that bike. Curse him! My libido screamed at me. But his impassive expression gave nothing away.
We stared at each other. I stuffed my hands in my back pocket. Touching him would be the death of me.
“I brought you this.”
“What brought you here?”
We spoke at the same time, which made a hint of a smile lift the corner of his lips.
Hope. There was hope yet.
I took the small Manila envelope he had taken out from inside his jacket pocket. I turned it over in my hand, wondering what was in it.
“The pictures you asked for,” he explained, with a steady voice. “I’ve made prints but they’re all there, I believe.”
“I—” Should I look at the photos now? Should I check if they were all there? I had no idea how many he’d taken of me, of us, and I had no clue if I would be able to survive whatever emotions could come crashing down on me once I did. I dropped my hand and raised my head. “Thank you,” was all I could say. Anything else would betray my emotions.
Alex offered a smile, which did not glimmer in his eyes. But it was something. “Chase, what I said the other night...” He didn’t say more. His head cocked up as something caught his eyes behind me. I was afraid to find out what caught his attention. What if Danny had seen me leave and now decided to check on me? I gritted my teeth and prayed I was wrong.
“Nugget?” My father’s curious voice boomed from behind me.
I released a sigh of relief before turning. “Daddy? Is everything okay?” The other difficult part was to keep my dad away from Alex. I didn’t know how to explain him or his presence to my father. I jogged to meet my dad at the steps but he waved me away and continued walking to where Alex got off his bike and stood beside it.
“Good evening, sir,” Alex politely greeted, extending a hand over to my father. “Alex Laurent. Pleasure to meet you.”
“Walter Buford. You can call me Walt. Are you Levi’s brother?” Alex nodded. “Why don’t you come in and join us?”
I stiffened as Alex glanced at my direction, head tilted to one side, daring me to answer for him. But he turned back to my father and shook his head. “I have to go. I’ve got a long drive tonight.” Alex patted the leather seat on his Triumph.
“That’s a nice-looking motorcycle yah got there, son,” Daddy said. I about fainted when he called Alex ‘son’, even though I knew it meant nothing. “Where’re you headed?”
Alex looked over his shoulder, out to the slanted road, to the view of sparkling stars and shimmering city lights. “Not entirely sure.” Then he stared at me, with a gaze that bored into my whole being. “Wherever my heart leads me.” My chest tightened.
“Hmmm. You’d best be careful then. Our hearts can be wild.”
Shivers ran through me as I heard Daddy say the words he’d often said to me ever since my interest in boys had begun.
Alex licked his lips before swinging his leg over the cushioned seat. “Wise words. I’ll keep it in mind.” He propped his helmet back on his head and, before sliding down the visor, he bid me and my father goodbye. I wanted to hug him. Hold him. Kiss him. Taste him…one last time.
Daddy gripped my hand and squeezed while we watched Alex zip away. My heart hurt. “You’re going to be all right, Nugget. You are going to be fine.”
My dearest Hannah,
Take a risk, while you’re young and don’t be afraid to make mistakes.
Pack your bags and see the beauty out there. Out in the open. Past the borders. Past the paved streets...
I could recite the words from memory, from the letter I’d kept hidden. How many times had I read it through the years? However, I’d never taken even the first step to freedom and adventure the letter had promised. Instead, I’d hidden from all that. I’d run away, yes, but I’d built a wall to protect myself and keep others out. Where was the freedom in that?
Now, I was faced with a challenge. Back to square one, to my starting point. Would it be different this time around?
Except for me, everyone else had settled in their seats on the plane Levi had happily provided for us, which I’d been grateful for. Every bit of comfort it offered was helpful to my Dad. I grasped the leath
er-covered seat backs as I walked along the aisle to the first empty spot I could access and plopped my ass on it.
“Hannah, are you okay? You’ve gone pale.” Danny, of course, noticed everything.
I cleared my throat and sank deeper into the cushion. “Never better.”
He unbuckled his seatbelt, moved to the space beside me, and unglued my hand from the soft fabric I had a vice grip on. Danny leaned closer, muttering into my ear, “Fear of flying?”
“I’m sure it will pass,” I lied.
Danny wrinkled his forehead. “You’ve flown before, haven’t you? Years ago, the first time you left...or is this because of what happened?”
“No. I’ve never been on a plane.” It was all I could offer as a reply. I refused to open old wounds. I doubted it would help the situation.
“Hello, my name is Sophie, I will be your attendant for the duration of the flight.” A statuesque woman, with a French accent, stopped in front of us. Her pristine hair and perfectly pressed dress added to my anxiety. How could she be so perky? This was her job. She chose to get on a plane and walk around in six-inch heels while tens of thousands of feet up in the air. “Would you like some champagne?”
“I think I need something stronger. Horse tranquilizer maybe?” I said, and Sophie giggled. My own emotions did not change, and thankfully, Sophie saw it.
She straightened and smiled. “Levi made sure there was Scotch available for this flight. Neat?”
“Yes please. Bring the bottle.” I massaged my temples, while clicking my jaw. This was a nightmare. I was grateful to Levi for lending us his private plane for the trip back to Vermont. The luxurious and roomy jet was much easier for Daddy to travel in. His condition had worsened overnight, and it was important we get home so he could start his treatment right away.
Danny released my hand and helped me with my seatbelt. “I can talk you through the whole thing if you want. I’ve taken flying lessons for small planes, but I don’t think there’s much of a difference.”
“No. That’s not going to help.” I looked straight ahead where my parents were seated. I shouldn’t worry about my own fears when my father was quietly suffering.
My mother caught the look on my face. “Oh, Chastity. Are you not well? I’ve got something for you.”
“No, Mom, it’s fine.” Sophie came back, handing me a glass half-full of amber liquid. I knocked it back, winced, and stretched out my arm for another. She didn’t hesitate to refill it. Sophie was trained well. I liked her more now.
“We will be taking off shortly, and I can help your father move into the bedroom and rest while we’re in the air,” she informed.
The thought of being ‘in the air’ twisted my gut again.
“Here, sweetie, take these.” My mother handed Sophie something, and the attendant passed it to me.
There was a loud mechanical noise outside, and I didn’t think to check the pills my mother gave me. I swallowed them and drank the rest of my scotch. My breathing increased. There was a slick cover of sweat on my skin. If I were a skunk, I would be spraying stink all over the place.
Danny stayed quiet beside me, but he kept his hand and arm available for me to hold onto anytime something made me jump. When he asked if I thought it was a good idea to keep drinking, I growled at him and dug my fingers into his skin.
My blood pressure hit the roof. My stomach grumbled. My head continued to pound like a jackhammer. Moments later, blackness consumed me.
I’m falling. The mechanical noise continued as I fell and my entire body thudded on the floor. What the hell?
I opened my eyes and wanted to scream. This was worse than flying. Where the hell was I? And what was that buzzing noise?
Shit. My phone! I held myself up, pulling at the side of the bed to get back on it and grab the vibrating phone from a side table.
“Nica!” I yelled into the smartphone, while rubbing my sore bum.
“Chase? I’ve been calling for hours. Are you okay?”
I let my eyes wander. “I think I died and went to chintz hell.”
“What? Did you say ‘chintz’?”
I took in the decor, if one could call it that, and described it to my best friend. “It’s pink. It’s floral. It’s everywhere.” The garden flower-printed pink fabric covered the sides of all six dormer windows, and swayed above me on the canopy of the four-poster bed, matching the pillowcases and coverlet, and to top it all off, the fabric was also used as upholstery for the wing-back chair in one corner of the room. The walls were bubble gum pink. Thankfully the trims and ceiling were painted white.
“What are you talking about? Where are you?”
“I think I’m in my old room, except it’s not my room. It’s never been this pink and girly, even when I was younger.” I rubbed my behind as I tried to find comfort on the bed.
“I’m sure it’s not that bad.”
“Hold on.” I raised my phone, took a few pictures, and sent them to Nica.
“Oh my gosh.”
“Yeah. I gather my mother got carried away while I was gone. I’m afraid to find out what the rest of the house looks like.”
“Well...how was the flight?”
I shook my head and instantly regretted it, squeezing my eyes shut. “I honestly don’t remember. Mom gave me some pills to take and I think it knocked me out cold. I don’t even know how I got home.”
As I tried to recall any bit of the flight, there was a soft knock on the pink door. Danny’s head poked in when the door opened. “Oh good, you’re awake.” His smile widened as he walked in. It was eerie having him standing in my childhood bedroom again. Good thing I was still fully clothed.
“Nica, I’ll call you later. Danny’s here.”
“Yeah, no problem. I just wanted to say I miss you already. We all do.”
“I know. I miss you guys too. Talk soon.”
When I ended the call, I looked back at Danny. “Sorry, I didn’t realize you were on the phone,” he apologized.
“Don’t worry about it,” I said, replacing my phone back onto the table. “Nica was just checking up on me. My head’s killing me. How did I get here?”
Danny crossed the room and poured water into a glass from a pitcher on a sideboard, then sat on the edge of the bed and offered the drink to me.
“I guess the Valium and scotch cocktail hit you hard. You were out even before we took off.”
I almost sputtered the water. “Valium?” He nodded. “The pills my Mom gave me? What the hell is she doing with Valium?”
Danny shrugged. “You’ll have to ask her.” He gave me a look of concern. “How do you feel? Hungry?”
“Not really. Just... I feel like I’ve gone through the ringer. Did you help me up here?”
“Yeah. Don’t worry, I bench more than what you weigh.” Wow, so not what I wanted to hear. “That didn’t come out right. I mean...” He rubbed the back of his head.
“Relax, Danny. Thanks for your help. And for your information, I bench more than what you weigh too.”
He smiled, wide but softer at the corners, and it lit up his eyes. A tug in my belly caused me to pull at the fabric of my shirt, like it would release the pressure I felt in my abdomen.
Danny dropped his focus to the floor. “Your parents are resting now. Your Dad’s doctor just left, and he left his card for you.” He handed me a thick, cream business card. “You can call him if you have any questions. But you should eat, then rest for the night.”
“Are you staying here?” When he tilted his head up, our eyes met. “I mean, here at my parents’ house. Not in this room.”
“No. I have to go to my office before I head home.” Danny stood and pressed a kiss on my forehead. “It’s good to have you back, Hannah. You have my number if you ever want to talk. I’ll come by tomorrow morning.”
“Yeah, thanks, Danny.”
“Welcome home, Hannah.”
When he walked out of the room, I fell back onto my pillows and contemplated the whole scena
rio. I was back in Stowe, living with my parents, sleeping in this pink froufrou bedroom. My father wasn’t well. My mother carried Valium in her purse. My ex-fiancé had access to my bedroom, and seemingly, everything else in my life here.
How could I move forward? Would I? What would happen to the life I left behind?
I groggily got up and zipped open one of the bags I brought from San Francisco. I’d refused to pack all of my things. This was temporary. My father would go through his chemo and defy the odds. My mother would find something else to redecorate. And Danny...I wasn’t too sure about Danny, yet.
My heart dropped when a package spilled its contents by my feet. I sat on my haunches and gathered the photos from the floor. I didn’t think Alex had taken this many pictures of me, or any of us. But the evidence was there.
There were photos of me asleep, awake, reading, contemplating. And of Alex and me kissing, laughing into the camera or just being goofballs. I didn’t even recall any of these being taken. We looked so happy. We were happy. Then I wondered, where were the nude photos? I shook the envelope and a USB fell out. I suspected the rest were on it. I didn’t have the guts to look at them. As uncertain as I was with Danny, I refused to think of where Alex and I stood. If there was even something for us to stand on.
The distinction between what my life was like in San Francisco and what my life would be like in Stowe became evident on the third day. Courtesy of women who lunch (and gossip, and criticize).
Night number one was hazy from the accidental combination of anti-anxiety meds and scotch, heightened by the squeezing pain in my heart when I went through Alex’s photos. When I woke the next day, I was a pile of mush. I donned my largest pair of sunglasses to keep my mother from asking why I appeared to have grapes inside my puffy eye bags.
To think that my real first day back would have been easy was major BS. I’d skipped breakfast after a long shower, and moseyed on to accompany Daddy to his appointment with his oncologist, his general practitioner, his mechanic, his barber, his new farm manager, the vet and the recently pregnant cow, and Daddy’s lawyer, Danny. By the time we met with him, I had a migraine and couldn’t stomach the thought of sitting through another meeting.