Break Her Fall

by JoAnna Grace

  God, what kind of a mate could she possibly be to Ezekiel? Everything she did was selfish and often reckless. When it came to men, she usually had two options: fight or fuck. Either way, she remained detached and aloof, never making personal connections with anyone outside her immediate family.

  Martin’s words brought up a new fear. What if she didn’t connect with Ezekiel during sex either? What if she slept with him and walked away feeling just as dirty and detached as always?

  Ezekiel paced the hall, waiting for Martin to come out of Ami’s room. It had been long enough, right? How long did it take to say “thanks for saving my ass”? Maybe he was adding on something like . . . and I’m a complete douche bag, don’t know what you ever saw in me. You should totally mate with and marry Ezekiel. He’s a much better man, a great man, and you two are perfect together.

  Okay, maybe that was a stretch, but still.

  Martin opened the door a few moments later and faced Ezekiel alongside Conall, Tyrone, and Melissa. He scanned the four of them with a steady gaze, his confidence grating on Ezekiel’s nerves. Martin appeared cocky, at least until he met Tyrone’s glacial stare. He swallowed hard and turned his head away. “Ami said she’s tired and wants to be alone.”

  “I’ll check on her.” Melissa slipped into the room and closed the door.

  Martin pushed through the unyielding wall of men and headed down the hall. He turned at the last minute. “You know you can’t fix her, right?”

  Ezekiel crossed his arms over his chest and stared down the less-dominant man. “That’s the difference between us, Martin. You see someone who needs to be fixed, but I see someone who was never broken—just misused.”

  Martin walked away, shaking his head. That bastard would never understand Amilynn the way Ezekiel did. He turned to Conall and Tyrone, both of whom were wearing similar expressions of approval. Ty motioned his head towards the room, signaling Ezekiel to go. No doubt Martin had left damage in his wake.

  Melissa sat on the side of Ami’s bed, holding her one hand while Ami wiped tears with the back of the other. She looked in the opposite direction of Ezekiel and sniffed. So tough and yet so vulnerable, his amazing mate.

  “Bianca and the boys will be here later,” Melissa said. “Ty and I are going to run home and get some rest. Why don’t you try to rest also?”

  Ami nodded, but kept her face averted even after Melissa left. Ezekiel sat down and waited for her to put her armor back on. He knew a woman like her would hate to be seen as weak. If she only knew. All he saw in her was strength.

  “You okay?” Ezekiel asked after a long bout of silence.

  “Yeah.”

  “Do I need to kill him?”

  “No.” She clenched her jaw.

  “Are you going to kill him?”

  She scoffed. “No. He has a right to his anger.” Her eyes misted over again and she sniffed.

  “Ami.” He waited. “Look at me.” She finally did, and his heart broke. Her façade was cracking and he didn’t want her to splinter apart. “What do you need?”

  His question stumped her; he could see it in the way her eyes widened, then blinked away new tears. Her voice was barely a whisper when it came out. “I don’t know.”

  Ezekiel nodded. “Okay.” He reached up and clicked the injector that delivered pain medication to her IV. He sat in his chair and took her hand. “Sleep. I’ll be right here when you figure it out.”

  Ami lowered the bed into a flat position and threw her free arm over her eyes. She didn’t sleep. Ezekiel paid attention to her breathing and the way her body never quite relaxed, the way her hand held tight to his, never easing the grip. But for over an hour, she didn’t move. She kept her eyes covered and every now and then took heavy, shaky breaths. Ezekiel stayed silent and still. His mate needed time to think, time to work things out in her own head. No matter what, he wasn’t going to let her go; he was in far too deep now.

  “Talk to me.”

  He jumped when she halfway rolled over and looked up at him.

  “About?”

  “Anything. I need to get out of my head.”

  Ezekiel scrubbed his hand over his face, letting out a guttural growl.

  “What did I do?” Ami asked.

  “Every time I think I have you figured out, you throw a curve ball. I was literally sitting here thinking about how I should shut the hell up and give you time to work out whatever bullshit Martin threw at you.”

  Amilynn smiled and Ezekiel leaned in closer, dumbstruck by the beauty of her.

  “You’re trying to figure me out? Good luck, sucker. Even I don’t have me figured out.”

  “A fool’s errand, I know.” He brought her hand to his mouth and nibbled her fingers. “And yet, I’ll keep trying.”

  Amilynn bit her bottom lip. “Z, have you really thought about this, about us? You’re only twenty years old. I’m sure you have plans and goals that don’t involve a wife. What about the rest of your college? What happens when the Pack finds out their next alpha is also mated to a feline? Look at Kasey and Vivian. People are still trying to separate them. No one wants to see you with one of us.”

  “One of us?” Ezekiel shook his head. “You stubborn woman; you are Pack. You nearly lost your leg, hell, lost your life to save a wolf. You didn’t know that was Martin; you said so yourself. You think people will overlook that?”

  “I think people will justify my actions because it was Martin and because I was sleeping with him.”

  Ezekiel had to look away. He didn’t need reminders that she’d fought against their mating so desperately.

  “See.” She released his hand and rolled over to her back. “You can’t even see past it.”

  Ezekiel stood and paced the room. “I’ll admit that I’d really like to castrate Martin. And yeah, I’m pretty pissed that you screwed around with him, knowing we were meant to be together.” Ami’s eyes clenched shut, but Ezekiel continued. “I’m angry that my wolf picked a mate at my age, but not about his choice. I’m angry that up until a couple days ago, you were so against mating me that you turned to someone else. But I don’t blame you for being scared. I’m terrified.” He flopped back down in the chair and put his arms behind his head. His breath left in a rush.

  “I’ve known since I was little that Kasey was training me to be an alpha. Every lesson I’ve ever learned started with ‘an alpha wouldn’t do that’ or ‘an alpha would know to do this.’ My entire life, I’ve lived with that pressure. My uncle is a competent leader and he makes it seem so simple. I know it’s not, but it’s like he doesn’t sweat it. He’s a natural. How do I live up to that? And, let’s face it, either I have to fill Kasey’s shoes, or I have to leave and find a Pack of my own.” He looked into Ami’s green eyes. “I’m not ready for either and now my wolf throws a mate on top of that. So not only do I have the pressure of taking care of a Pack—holy shit—but I have a wife to take care of too.” He let out a bitter laugh. “I can barely take care of myself.”

  Thankfully, Amilynn didn’t have the chance to respond. Dr. Charles came in to check on her leg. Ami pulled herself together enough to make jokes with him and smile. It didn’t reach her eyes; they kept flickering over to Ezekiel. Maybe he should’ve kept his damned mouth shut. The last thing a woman needed to know was that her mate was weak and scared of the future.

  ALL THIS TIME, not once had Amilynn ever stopped to consider Ezekiel’s point of view. Hearing him vent to her now, she sensed the weight he carried. They were both labeled when they were children—her to be a fighter, him to be a leader.

  It was so easy for her to breeze through life, to act without discretion and damn the consequences. She wasn’t in charge, she wasn’t a leader, and there was always someone to pass the buck to. In many ways, Amilynn lived flippantly. Vivian was the alpha lady who made decisions. Conall was the most dominant male of their family, so he bore the role as protector. Ty and Melissa were responsible to each other. That had always left her to do what the hell she wanted.
She was back-up. Nothing more.

  Ezekiel, on the other hand, was born into responsibility, into the role of decision-maker, protector, and now, mate. He was everything she wasn’t. Expectations were high for him and non-existent for her. How did he live with the pressure? How did he walk under the weight set upon him from his youth? Here he was, giving it his best shot. He had accepted their mating from the beginning and was determined to make it work.

  What had she done? Run as fast as she could into the arms of someone else, someone who wouldn’t hold her accountable.

  “Well, let’s look at this leg, eh?” Dr. Charles’ voice pulled her out of her thoughts. He unwrapped the bandage on her leg and Ami flinched. It was the first time she’d seen it. Her right thigh looked like spaghetti. Five deep and angry lines ran jagged across her leg at an angle. Skin was missing, her veins were visible and pulsating. The doc had pulled skin together to make up for the pieces that were ripped away. Even now, there were places open to her muscle.

  “Fuck me, that’s ugly.” Amilynn crinkled her nose at the smell of blood and her scarring flesh. Ezekiel put a hand on her shoulder in silent support. It was just the comfort she needed.

  Charles let out a deep breath. “Sweetheart, it looks a lot better than it did this morning.”

  “I’m going to have to cover it up for months. How am I supposed to wear skirts?”

  The doctor’s shoulders dropped and he gave Ami a cold stare. “That’s what you’re worried about? Skirts? You shouldn’t be showing that much leg anyway, young lady.”

  Ami pointed a finger at him, seeing the glint in his eyes. “You’re my doctor, not my daddy. Watch it.”

  Charles’s lips twitched. “Fine, as your doctor, I’m telling you to thank God you have a leg at all. And don’t give me attitude; I know where the sedatives are.”

  “Pshh.” Ami waved him off, thankful for his sense of humor and his skills. “Don’t make me smack you with a rolled up newspaper.”

  Charles narrowed his eyes and grinned as he applied ointment to Ami’s leg. “Is she always this snarky or just when she’s injured?” he asked Ezekiel, not turning his face from his examination.

  “Don’t think you’re special, Charles; she takes a bite out of everyone.” Ezekiel winked at her and Ami rolled her eyes. She was not going to swoon over that dimpled smile in front of the doctor. But her mate could be adorable when he wanted to be.

  Charles touched a particularly tender piece of flesh and she came off the bed with a round of curses and snarls. She glared at Charles. “Do that again and that bite will be a literal one.”

  The good doctor apologized and asked the nurse to re-bandage the wound. To Ami’s surprise, Ezekiel stepped in and took the supplies from the nurse. He carefully and meticulously applied the gauze to her leg. His hands were gentle and she wondered what they would feel like gliding up her thighs to more intimate places. His brows furrowed with concentration and she smiled to herself.

  When he was finished, Ezekiel leaned down and kissed the injury. Ami got all choked up and had to think about assembling her pistol before she did something unforgivable—like cry in front of people.

  “I want you to stay through the night,” Dr. Charles said. “As much as your brother helped, I’m still worried about infection. I’m off shift, but I’ll be on call if there’s an emergency. If all looks good in the morning, we can discharge you and you can recover at home.”

  “Music to my ears.” Ami relaxed into the bed.

  Ezekiel’s phone chimed as the doctor left the room. He answered and Amilynn tried not to listen in. It was hard, being in the same room, feline super-hearing and all.

  She recognized Bianca’s voice. “Will you run over to the school and pick up your brothers? I’m not quite done with dinner and they had basketball practice.”

  “Where’s Dad? Can’t he—”

  Ami waved her hands in the air.

  “Hold on, Mom.” Ezekiel put his hand over the phone and gave her a questioning look.

  “Go get them,” Ami said. “You’ve been here all day. Go get some fresh air. Conall’s here. I’m fine. Take a break.” She smiled, hoping that would assure him.

  Indecision flashed on his face and she could see him struggle. Ami shooed him with her hands. “Go.”

  Ezekiel pinched his lips together and put the phone to his ear again. “I’ll run over there real quick.”

  “Thanks sweetie,” Bianca said. “I’m sorry to ask, but I’m making Ami’s favorite. Your father and I will bring it to the hospital in about half an hour.”

  Ezekiel finished his call and braced his hands on his hips. He didn’t have to say anything. Ami knew he didn’t want to leave her. She held out her hands to him and he came to sit on her bedside. “I’ll be fine. Maybe I’ll catch a cat nap before everyone gets here.”

  Ezekiel chuckled. “Isn’t every nap you take a cat nap?”

  Ami rolled her eyes, but laughed at his pun. “Dork.”

  His dimpled smile faded as he reached up and pushed her hair behind her ear. “I want to finish our previous conversation. Don’t think I’m hesitant about mating you, Amilynn.”

  She leaned her head into his palm. “I know. We can put this discussion on hold for now. Go get your brothers. I’m not going anywhere.”

  “You sure? Not going to jump out of the window to save a pedestrian, are you?”

  Ami bit his thumb in reprimand. The action backfired when lust flared in Ezekiel’s eyes. He traced her lips with his thumb, and Ami’s breath deepened. All he had to do was look at her with those sexy, slate-blue eyes and thick black lashes and she was sunk. No man had ever caused such a quick and visceral reaction in her.

  Mate, her cat purred. She clawed inside Ami’s skin, wanting desperately to rub up against her man.

  Ezekiel took a deep breath and closed his eyes. “Ami.” He took another breath and reached down to adjust himself in his jeans. “You have the worst timing.”

  “What?” she asked, her eyes glued to his growing erection.

  Ezekiel leaned over and nuzzled at her neck, breathing in deeply. “Your mating scent. Holy shit, baby.” He kissed her neck, nipping at her sensitive skin. She could feel the wolf, so close, so close to breaking control.

  “Sorry.” Ami felt heat rise up her neck and flood her face. Of all the times and places for her leopard to get amorous, this was less than ideal.

  “Don’t be,” he whispered against her skin. “That’s the most intoxicating scent in the world.” The rumble in his voice and the way his chest vibrated when he spoke called up her leopard.

  From one breath to the next, Ezekiel launched himself backwards and away from her. “Ami, Ami, Ami.” He shook his head and took a deep breath. “I’m going to go pick up my brothers.”

  “With that?” Ami licked her lips at the bulge in his jeans.

  “Ah, hell.” He adjusted himself again, but it didn’t help.

  “Think of your parents having sex.” Ami shrugged when Ezekiel made a gagging sound.

  “That did it. Thanks, babe.” He winked at her, and she laughed out loud as he exited the room.

  Conall stuck his head in and wrinkled his nose. “Daaaamn. That’s potent shit, Amilynn.”

  She picked at the blanket and put on the haughtiest expression she could. “Wait until you find a mate, sucker. You’ll see.”

  “Me? Mate?” Conall chuckled. His bitterness was sharp on her ears and tart on her tongue. “That must be some strong juju for you to start thinking rainbows and unicorns.” He leaned against the doorframe, as if the mating scent would infect him if he came too close.

  “It’s not rainbows and unicorns. It’s unavoidable. And,” she shrugged one shoulder, her face heating up under Conall’s scrutiny, “it’s not that bad, I guess. I still think he’s trying to get in my pants. It’s going to take time.”

  Conall narrowed his eyes and his lips thinned. He let out a humph. “First, I have to hand over V to a wolf, now you. What’s next?”
>
  “Be careful asking that.” Ami grinned and sent up a prayer that Conall, who had left everything behind for the good of others, be blessed with a mate so wonderful he would be knocked on his ass the first time they met. As much as he’d sacrificed, as much torture as he’d been through with Vivian, as much guilt and self-resentment as he carried around for things far beyond his control, Conall deserved happiness greater than he could ever fathom.

  Ami studied his face, the distinct lines of his jaw and the crooked nose, his light blue eyes that took on hazel undertones when his lion was close to the surface, the way his shaggy blond hair needed a trim. He was a good-looking guy. One day, he would sweep a lucky girl off her feet.

  “Hey, dude?” Ami asked. “You have something on your mind?”

  Conall shook his head and shifted his eyes to a random spot on the wall. “Nah. I’m cool.”

  “Bullshit.”

  He grinned. “You can always read me, can’t you?”

  “Talk to me, big man.” Ami patted the side of her bed and carefully scooted over to make room for him to sit. She held his hand, their cats used to the connection they shared.

  “I’ve been wondering if I shouldn’t go back to Nevada—”

  “What the hell for?”

  “—to turn myself in and try to talk some sense into my cousin.”

  “Are you insane?” Ami said, her voice far too loud. “Trace would kill you the instant he saw you. You know that. Don’t be rash.”

  “Rash? Um, can you say ‘pot meet kettle’?”

  “Conall.” Ami tried to control her nerves. Did he have a death wish? “I know leaving Nevada was hardest on you because of your family, but you’re a fool if you think Trace will listen to a word you have to say.”

  “He’s my cousin.”

  “He’s a fucking psychopath who made you rape Vivian, and that was before you got on his bad side. What do you think he’ll do now?”

  Conall’s massive shoulders moved up and down with his heavy breath. “Yeah, you’re probably right.” He sounded utterly defeated. “I’m just trying to figure out how to stop this.”