Stars Collide

by H. P. Munro

  She pressed the connect button and held the phone to her ear still lying snuggled into her duvet. “Hey there, what’s up?” she asked her voice still thick with sleep.

  “Did I wake you?” her mother’s concerned tone filled her ear.

  “No, I was awake,” Jordan lied.

  Mary Ellis knew her daughter and knew when she was being lied to but smiled at her youngest child’s need to please, “You’re not working today?”

  Jordan stifled a yawn, “I am tonight, we have a night shoot.”

  “Ah…So anything exciting happening with you?” Mary asked cautiously.

  “Generally or specifically?” Jordan asked stretching and wincing as her back cracked in several places.

  Deciding to tackle the issue head on Mary tightened her grip on the telephone, “There’re more photos of you and that girl on the interweb and a story of you serenading her.”

  “Inter…net Mom, Internet,” Jordan rolled her eyes and sat up fluffing the pillows around her.

  “Whatever it’s called, your grandma was asked at her aquarobics class this morning whether you were a...” Mary lowered her voice, “a lesbian.”

  Feeling an anger rise in her Jordan tensed her hand around the cover of her duvet, “And what if I am Mom.”

  “I knew we should never have let you leave Orlando,” a male voice interjected.

  “Dad, you’re on the line?” Jordan threw her hand up in the air. “Oh good god Dad, if I’d stayed in Florida the closest I would have come to acting would have been dressed as Pocahontas singing about the wind three times a day. This has nothing to do with me being in Los Angeles.”

  “Is there something going on with you and this Freya?” her father asked.

  Jordan closed her eyes and thumped her head against the headboard of her bed, “No Dad, we’re just friends. I like spending time with her.”

  “She seems nice,” Mary inserted, waving a dismissive hand towards her husband as he glared at her.

  “She is Mom, really nice,” Jordan couldn’t help the smile that spread across her face as she thought about Freya.

  “Does she make you happy?” another voice entered the conversation, “’cause you look happy in the photographs.”

  Jordan rolled her eyes and shook her head, “Grandma! Mom do you have me on speaker phone or something?”

  “No sweetheart, we were going to, but with your grandma’s hearing not being as it used to be we couldn’t. She’s on the extension.”

  Jordan looked at the ceiling shrugging as she threw up a silent ‘why me’.

  “So, Jordan, does she make you happy?” Jordan’s grandmother repeated.

  “Yes Grandma, when I’m around her I’m happy.”

  David Ellis raised his eyebrows at his daughter’s answer, “But you’re definitely not with her are you Jordan? You’re not gay?!”

  Jordan rubbed her eyes wondering what evil she had done to deserve this wake-up call.

  “But she could be bi,” her grandmother interjected. “Don’t you pay attention David, there are more letters in LGBT than just the L or the G.”

  Jordan flopped sideways and lay in a fetal position as she waited for an argument to rage between her grandmother and father.

  “I think I would know if my daughter was any of those letters,” David huffed. “Honey, are you?” he asked hesitatingly.

  “What does it matter? She’s happy!” Jordan’s grandmother insisted. “I’m happy for you Jordan. I kissed a girl back in college, it wasn’t my thing as it turned out but if that’s what gets the engine revving for you then more power to your elbow.”

  David opened and closed his mouth several times.

  Deciding that she’d had enough, Jordan sat back up.

  “If you’re all done. Thank you Grandma for sharing that…unexpected part of your past.” Jordan shook her head quickly, “Like I said, yes I like her and she makes me happy. I’m happy when I’m around her and if it was ever to go further than being friends then…” Jordan filled her mouth with air, releasing it rapidly, “then you would just need to deal with it.”

  She waited expectantly for the fall out of her announcement to hit.

  Across the country Mary and David exchanged surprised looks. Although never one to shirk from an argument if provoked, their youngest daughter had always performed the role of peace-keeper in the house and so her passionate answer to their question told them all that they needed to know about how she felt. Whether she was aware of it or not.

  Watching her daughter and her husband, Jordan’s grandmother smirked knowingly.

  “Okay,” Mary shrugged her shoulders at her husband and smiled, inwardly cursing that this meant that she owed her mother twenty dollars from a stupid bet made after the first photos of Jordan and Freya emerged. “So tell us about her.”

  Jordan opened her mouth in shock, “Well, let’s see.” She snuggled back down into her duvet and started to tell her family about Freya.

  ***

  Freya woke to the sound of movement in her kitchen. She swung her legs out of her bed and opened her closet door as quietly as possible. She reached in and moved her hand around until she came across the handle of a tennis racquet. Pulling it from the closet she walked to her bedroom door and pulled it open before padding silently through her house while looking for the source of the noise. The kitchen door was ajar and she could hear her refrigerator door being opened. Deciding to act quickly she leapt into the kitchen yelling loudly, landing with her feet planted shoulder width apart the racquet held out in front of her.

  A loud scream came from behind the refrigerator as a milk carton hit the floor and exploded.

  Freya looked down at the mess on the floor with realization dawning on her as she recognized the footwear currently covered in milk.

  “Dan! Seriously, what the fuck?”

  Dan half-closed the fridge door with one hand the other hand held tightly to his chest. “You almost gave me a heart attack Martina,” he shouted accusingly.

  “You’re the one sneaking into my home,” Freya yelled back taking in Dan’s unusually disheveled appearance.

  Slamming the fridge door shut Dan huffed, “I wasn’t sneaking, I was returning your car and making breakfast, well brunch,” he looked at the clock. “Actually given the time it should probably just be lunch.”

  “Wait, are you doing the walk of shame?”

  Lifting his feet up out of the puddles of milk Dan flashed a wide grin, “Maybe, turns out that my date was big on the environment and your Prius was exactly the ticket.”

  Freya leaned the tennis racquet against the island in the center of her kitchen, “So you didn’t mention to him that it wasn’t your car?”

  “What and pass up the possibility of sex, nooooo!” Dan shook his head, grabbing a cloth and starting to mop his trousers and shoes down. “Talking about sex, was there any nubbing happening with you and Jordan last night?”

  Snatching the cloth from him, Freya crouched down to start mopping up the floor, “No there was no nubbing as you so delightfully put it. We had a lovely evening.”

  “You tell her you’re gay yet?”

  “Not yet.”

  Freya didn’t look up as she squeezed the milk-sodden cloth into the sink and returned to clear up the rest.

  “Have you moved the filters for your perky copulator?” Dan muttered searching through a cupboard. Yelling in triumph as he pulled out a pack of filters he started to make a pot of coffee, “You planning on telling her anytime soon?”

  Stalling Freya screwed her face up and gave her head a slight shake, “Yeeeesss.”

  “You’re lying, I watched that show about body language, you can’t fool me madam.”

  “I will tell her, soon,” Freya finished carefully. “I was going to last night but…”

  Dan walked round and pulled Freya into a hug, “Oh Egg, I know you’re scared that it could ruin things between you, but you’re fooling yourself at the moment. She’s not your girlfriend, you’r
e not dating her my little Eponine, so tell her.”

  “I know and I will.”

  “Where the hell did the tennis racket come from, you’re rubbish with balls,” Dan grinned.

  Freya wrinkled her nose. “You smell like boy sex, go shower and I’ll make breakfast, brunch, lunch.”

  She laughed as Dan waltzed out of the kitchen warbling ‘On My Own’.

  Twenty minutes later Dan sat wrapped in Freya’s bathrobe scraping burnt toast with his knife, “So what’s the plan today?”

  “I have an interview with V magazine this afternoon and then have to be on set at eleven tonight. What about you?”

  Finally satisfied that his toast was edible Dan smeared jam onto it, “I’m going to go see a man about exhibition space.”

  Freya’s hand froze in midair, her slightly soggy toast drooping.

  “You’re finally doing it?”

  Dan gave her a small nod.

  “I am so proud of you, so proud in fact that I’ll even forgive you for your rendition of ‘Secret Love’ in the shower.”

  “Living the dream, petal. Living the dream,” Dan smiled.

  ***

  Freya entered the coffee shop and scanned the room for the reporter that she was due to meet. Seeing a woman half rise out of her seat in recognition, she smiled and walked towards her.

  “Stephanie?” she asked holding out her hand.

  “Yeah, hi, thank you for agreeing to do this,” Stephanie responded shaking Freya’s hand.

  “It’s my pleasure. Do you want a coffee or something?” Freya pointed back towards the counter.

  Indicating down towards her own mug Stephanie shook her head, “Sorry, I had to order, slight caffeine addiction.”

  “I’ll just be two seconds,” Freya smiled and walked back towards the serving area. Ordering her coffee, she could not help but feel trepidation. This was it, she had decided that in this interview she would finally come out. She accepted the coffee mug from the waitress and walked back towards the comfy seats that Stephanie had selected.

  “When’s this likely to be published?”

  “Errr,” Stephanie raised her eyes trying to summon the information from her memory. “Should be on the stands in two weeks’ time.”

  “Great,” Freya smiled. She bit her lip as she shot Stephanie an apologetic look, “I’m assuming my agent clarified the no go areas.”

  “He did. I won’t ask you any questions about your family.”

  Freya breathed a sigh. It was always difficult navigating interviews when the questions seemed to focus on her family more than her, so she was always relieved when Dominick gave the instruction to not question her about them. She would mention them when appropriate. She wasn’t adverse to speaking about them, but she had become wise to journalists interviewing her as an easy access route to her more famous family members.

  “So,” the journalist started. “Did you know when you joined the cast that Emily was going to be a lesbian?”

  Freya took a small careful sip of her coffee, “No, I came on just for a three episode arc and sort of thought that was going to be it. I love Front Line and I was a fan before I auditioned. I was very pleased to be asked to firstly stay on the rest of last season and then to come back as a regular this season.”

  Stephanie laughed, “So how were you approached about the direction that they wanted to take Emily in?”

  “Eleanor French asked whether I would be interested. It was a story that they wanted to pursue, and had talked about doing a couple of times, but felt that the timing wasn’t right. However, with gay rights becoming more and more front and center with the ending of ‘don’t ask, don’t tell’ etcetera, they felt now would be a good time to profile a same sex relationship in the military.”

  “Your character is going into a relationship with Georgia this season, who previously dated men, do you foresee this being an issue for them?”

  Freya stretched her neck, this was when she hated interviews. She hated the politics of the answers she had to give in terms of giving enough information for people to read, but not revealing too much of the plotline.

  “I think that all relationships have issues and that a lot of those issues can be formed through insecurities on both parties regarding previous relationships. What’s nice about the story is that the writers are approaching this like any other relationship. They’re not making any allowances for it being a relationship between two women.”

  “What’s it like working with Jordan Ellis?”

  Breaking out into a genuine smile Freya visibly relaxed for the first time since sitting down, “She’s a dream to work with, we get on so well and she’s incredibly talented. I feel like I’ve progressed working with her as you have to really raise your game when you’re acting with her to hold your own.”

  Stephanie gave an awkward shift in her seat as she approached the next question, “There have been rumors that the relationship isn’t just on screen.”

  The relaxation that Freya had been feeling instantly disappeared.

  “Yeah, I saw that, Jordan is a good friend and those photographs were taken waaaay out of context,” she answered emphatically leaving Stephanie under no illusion that that particular line of questioning was over.

  “Do you think it’s important to have characters like Emily on TV giving a positive portrayal of a gay woman?”

  This was it. This was the question that Freya had been waiting on.

  She was going to come out.

  Right now.

  Right here.

  She took a deep breath, “I think it’s vital. Emily was already receiving positive comments at the end of last season, so people got to know her rather than her sexuality. We have a responsibility to hold a mirror up to our country. Where there is intolerance, where there is hatred we need to show people whose sexuality isn’t an issue and who are living their lives in positive and productive ways and where their relationships are accepted by friends and co-workers as normal.” Freya took another breath, “We are in a unique position where we can be the voice for a community who for so long has struggled to be heard. Judging by the letters I’m already receiving, and we’re not even on air yet, there is definitely a need.”

  Freya barely listened to the remainder of their conversation. She provided answers to the questions, but the whole time she had only one thought in mind.

  She had choked on match point.

  She hadn’t given the response that she wanted to give. For some reason the passion was there but the actual words just wouldn’t come out. Before she knew it, she was shaking hands goodbye with Stephanie.

  She left the journalist sitting in the coffee shop writing up some notes and stood outside on the sidewalk, the sun warm on her skin. Looking up she chewed on her bottom lip, she was so disappointed with herself. She clenched her fists at her side and let out a frustrated yowl, alarming people walking past her. Looking embarrassed, she apologized then spun round, yanked the door open and strode back across to Stephanie.

  “I want to change an answer.”

  Stephanie looked up in surprise. “Okay, which question?” she flicked back through her notebook.

  “The one about positive representation,” Freya nodded summoning her resolve. “I should’ve started that answer by saying. As a gay woman in real life, I think that it’s vital etcetera etcetera…thank you.”

  Freya gave a tight smile then turned and exited the coffee shop, throwing her arms up in celebration as she left.

  September 2011

  Freya stood hopping from foot to foot, she checked her character’s watch, it was five past midnight. The temperature had seemed to plummet as soon as night fell and she was grateful again that their characters were in the military so her feet were toasty in thick socks and boots. Putting one hand deeper into the long puffa jacket she was wearing over her uniform she walked around waiting for Dan to pick up her call.

  “Who died?” a muffled voice came onto the phone.

  “Hu
h?” Freya responded, “No one, why would you think that?”

  “Phone etiquette Freya. A call before nine is polite, after nine but before ten is verging on the rude. After ten thirty unacceptable and at midnight it better arsing be because someone has bloody died!” Dan huffed loudly turning in his bed and switching the bedside light on.

  Freya grinned down the phone, “Well if you’d answered my earlier calls or responded to the countless messages I left then I wouldn’t be calling you now.”

  “I was asleep, I had rather a late one last night remember,” Dan yawned. “How’d the interview go?”

  “I did it. I told them.”

  Freya danced on the spot, giddy from the feeling of lightness that surrounded her following her public coming out. She had not felt this sort of relief and empowerment since she was eighteen and told her parents…Anna had been a completely different ball of wax.

  Dan sat up suddenly wide awake, “You told the magazine, before you told Jordan? Do you think that was wise?”

  “I have two weeks before it’s published. They’ve got a scoop they’re not going to wreck that, so I have two weeks to tell her and Eleanor and I know how I’m going to do it. I’m going to get her to come round on Friday and I’ll tell her then.”

  “Eleanor?”

  “Jordan, you idiot!”

  Slapping a hand to his forehead Dan frowned, “I hope that you’re right sweetie.”

  Freya became distracted as Jordan walked towards her carrying two cups of coffee. It was the first time she had seen more than just a glimpse of her since getting on set due to their conflicting wardrobe, hair and make-up schedules.

  “Gotta go, love you.”

  Freya hung the call up and buried her cell back into her pocket.

  Dan looked at his phone. “Love you too,” he said as he tossed the handset down to the bottom of the bed, turned off his lamp and flopped back down to continue sleeping.

  “Hey Jordan,” Freya smiled broadly with her dimples on full wattage as she lifted herself up onto her tiptoes in excitement at seeing Jordan.

  “Hey yourself, you look hot, warm. I mean warm, in your coat, you look warm,” Jordan rambled. Horrified at her reply she turned to look across to where the grips were finishing setting up the lighting rigs for the shoot. Everyone was aware that they had a long busy night ahead of them in order to capture all the scenes they were scheduled to shoot. “Sooo I had a nice time last night.” She was relieved that this time she managed to speak without putting her foot in it.