Merry Cowboy Christmas

by Carolyn Brown

  “Are you okay?” Lizzy asked worriedly. “You look like you just saw a ghost.”

  “I’m fine.” Fiona managed a tight smile. “Don’t start trying to fix me up with every eligible bachelor in the county.”

  “Wouldn’t dream of it,” Allie laughed. “But give the baby one more kiss because if I don’t get the eggs and vanilla to Dora June soon, she can’t make any more cookies. According to her, it won’t matter if the ranchers have to use sleds and mules to pull them, the party will be huge and a success.”

  “Oh, yeah?” Lizzy asked.

  “She says that no rancher would stay home when Bubba Joe’s catering barbecue and when there’s free booze on a cold night,” Allie said. “Besides, everyone in this part of Texas will turn out just to see Truman dressed up like Santa damn Claus.”

  “Who’s going to Wichita Falls to buy the liquor?” Fiona asked, but her mind was still on unprotected sex.

  “Jud volunteered to pick it up next week. You going with him?” Lizzy asked.

  “Depends on how many cookies y’all get made. I might need to stay home and help cook.” Fiona kissed Audrey’s chubby cheek once more and handed her off to Allie.

  “What’s going on with you two?” Allie asked bluntly.

  “We’re friends, I guess.” How could she answer that honestly when she wasn’t sure what they were or what she really wanted them to be? How would last night affect anything they might or might not have? She mentally calculated how many days until she’d know for sure if the night had produced a positive sign on a pregnancy test and came up with the lucky number seven.

  In one week, just two days before the party, she would know because she’d never been a day late in her life. Regular as clockwork and hopefully this wasn’t ovulation time.

  “He looks at you like you could be more than friends,” Allie said.

  “That’s because there’s not an abundance of eligible women in Dry Creek. When we have the party, you can bet all the women will come out of the woodwork to get a chance at him and he’ll look at me a hell of a lot differently then.”

  “Will that make you jealous?”

  Fiona shook her head. “Hell no! We’d never—”

  Lizzy cut her off. “Never say never. I said it and Allie said it and look what happened. Not that I’m complainin’ one bit. If you get tired of book work, come on home and we’ll let you play with the baby if you don’t want to cook with us.”

  Ten minutes later, Fiona was alone with nothing but her scary thoughts and numbers on the computer that wouldn’t stop blurring when she looked at them.

  The truck tires slid to one side of the slippery road before Jud got control of the steering wheel. The wipers worked as fast as they could, but the sleet and snow mixture fell faster than they could swipe the windshield clean. Stupid! Stupid! That’s what he was. He never had unprotected sex. It didn’t matter if she was on the pill or swore she’d had a hysterectomy; he took precautions of his own.

  He slapped the steering wheel, went into another long, greasy slide, and grabbed the thing like a long-lost brother, straightening up in a few seconds. If only it were that easy to get control of his irresponsibility, the world would be right.

  There wasn’t one single car or truck on Main Street. Of course not: All the smart people were home counting their condom supply. He circled around behind the convenience store. Katy’s red car was right next to the back door and the lights from the store cast a yellow glow out the window through the driving winter storm.

  He slid in beside the car and ran from truck to the back room of the store. Without knocking, he rushed inside, stomped the white stuff from his boots onto the rug in front of the door, and looked around for Fiona. The desk chair was empty. The lights in the front of the store were turned off and her computer screen was dark.

  “Fiona,” he called out, and heard the sound of her boots on the tile floor.

  “I was making sure everything was locked up for the weekend,” she said. “What brings you to town? Does Dora June need something else? Good thing you got here when you did because I’m sure not coming back out in this miserable weather once I get home.” She paused. “About last night…”

  “I’m so, so sorry. I always, always…” His chest tightened.

  Fiona hiked a hip on the desk. “It’s not just your fault. I didn’t think of it, either.”

  Those green eyes drew him to her. He should take her into his arms and assure her that if their unprotected sex had caused a problem he would share in the responsibility. But his feet were glued to the floor.

  “You’ve got that deer-in-the-headlights look in your eyes.” She managed a weak smile.

  She was right. He felt like a big buck whitetail deer standing in the middle of the road with a semi coming right at him. What in the hell had he been thinking? He hadn’t been! That was the whole problem. He wanted Fiona; she wanted him. They were consenting adults.

  “I wouldn’t marry you, even if I was pregnant,” she said softly.

  “Why?”

  “Because of the way you look right now and because you are going to live in Dry Creek and I’m going to move away. Those are the facts that can’t be changed. Life is more than a brand of cereal. If it was meant that I’d be a single parent, then so be it. If not and according to the calendar, the time of ovulation should be over, then so be that, too. I’m learning to deal with the problems life throws at me, Jud.”

  “Well, I want you to know that if a baby happens, you won’t have to deal with it alone. I would never…”

  She smiled. “I know.”

  “Are we good, then?” he asked.

  “We’re good.” She nodded. “Front door is locked. Lights are out. Thermostat is adjusted. Book work is all caught up. Can we go home now?”

  He nodded and held the door open for her.

  She’d said the words, but he hadn’t felt them—not at all. Instead of instant relief, his heart was a stone in his chest. The wind blew freezing rain across his face with such force that he ducked his chin and jogged to his truck. He was inside with the wipers on and the truck engine running when he noticed that Fiona was frantically scraping at the layer of ice on her windshield.

  Leaving his engine running, he grabbed his scraper and hurried over to help her. Some boyfriend he was, not even giving her a thought.

  Wait, boyfriend?

  Why not? asked a little voice in his head.

  Because they were too different, wanted different things. Roots. Wings. Country living. Big city life. Oil did not mix with water.

  “Another reason I don’t like north-central Texas,” she yelled above the howling wind.

  “Get in the car and I’ll finish this. You don’t even have gloves. Your fingers will freeze. We have got to get those other tires on this car,” he shouted.

  She didn’t argue, which was a miracle. He’d expected a dirty look that would melt the ice and scare away the gray skies but she nodded and got into the car. He could see her blowing on her hands to warm them and mentally kicked himself for not taking care of this sooner.

  Boyfriend?

  The word popped back into his mind.

  Friends?

  He argued with the voice in his head.

  With benefits?

  He shook his head. He couldn’t do that because Fiona deserved so much more.

  What if she finds someone like a fancy lawyer?

  A wave of hot jealousy covered him. With every jab of the scraper against the layer of ice, he gave himself another lecture on how he had no right to be jealous because she’d been up front and honest about her future. And that did not have a rough old cowboy in the picture.

  He finally finished the job, waved at her, and trotted back to his truck. He waited for Fiona to back the car out and start moving slowly toward home before he followed at a safe distance behind her.

  Déjà vu!

  He held his breath when she went into a long, greasy slippery ride toward the ditch at one point,
but she got control and made her way around the next turn into the lane to home. She applied too much brake when she reached the yard, but it was far enough back that when the wheels came to a stop, she was still two feet away from the white picket yard fence.

  “That was close,” she yelled as she crawled out of the car and started to run toward the porch.

  He slammed the truck door and was only a few steps behind her when she slipped on the slick sidewalk and went down, arms flailing as she tried to latch on to anything to break her fall. Before she hit the ground, he reached forward to scoop her up in his arms like a bride, but leather-soled boots and ice do not make for a perfect situation. He managed to pick her up but then he went down in a sideways roll where he landed on his back with her on top of him.

  His cowboy hat sailed through the air, landing on a fence post and twirling several times before it stopped to hang there, waiting for him to reclaim it. He became the sled and she was the rider as they slid across the ice-covered yard toward the post where the hat had come to rest. They came to an abrupt stop when she threw out her hands and grabbed the trunk of an old pecan tree in the front yard. With the speed they were picking up in another five seconds, his head would have brought them to rest on a fence post.

  “I think you might have saved me from a fractured skull,” he said breathlessly.

  “You probably saved me from a broken arm or neck,” she panted as she rolled to one side.

  “Are we going to attempt standing up or just lie here and turn into Popsicles?”

  “I was thinking icicles,” she huffed. “But if you want to get up real slow like and brace your back against that tree trunk, I might let you help me to my feet.”

  He chuckled as he eased up, one tiny bit at a time.

  “What’s so funny?” she asked.

  “That was one wild ride, but it wasn’t as wild as last night,” he answered.

  “Honey, if it had been as hot as last night, we would have melted this ice and stopped a lot sooner. Look, it’s snowing again.” She brushed a flake from his hair.

  He grabbed her hand and held it against his face. “I can’t believe you are so calm about us not using birth control. I was freaking out.”

  “So was I at first, but what’s done is done and can’t be undone. I did stock up on condoms while I was cleaning the bathrooms at the store this afternoon, though.” She grinned.

  “So does that mean…”

  “What in the world is going on out here?” Dora June called from the open door. “Lord, I’m glad we don’t have close neighbors or the gossip would run rampant by morning. Get on in out of the cold. Supper’s ready.”

  “What the hell?” Truman yelled over her shoulder. “Good God almighty. Kids these days! Shut the door, Dora June, before you let all the warm air out.”

  Jud rolled to one side and sat up. “You think they’re going to ground us?”

  Fiona used the tree to pull herself to her feet. “I hope they let us eat supper before they send us to our rooms, but I don’t mind being grounded for a week or even more.”

  “How many condoms did you buy?”

  “Plenty enough for even you, cowboy.”

  It was a bad idea. No, it was a damn horrible idea to continue on this path they’d started, but he could no more stop it than he could a mad Angus bull coming at him at full speed. He’d suffer the consequences later, but right now, he wanted nothing more than to be grounded to his room for the next week.

  “I expect we’d better get started early, right?” he asked.

  She pointed toward the porch where her hobo bag had come to a stop when it stopped sliding.

  “Thank goodness nothing flew out,” he teased. “It would put a whole new meaning to ‘a cold one.’”

  She giggled. “Let’s get inside before we freeze to death and Truman has to dig two graves.”

  “I bet he’d bitch us back alive,” Jud laughed as he slung an arm around Fiona’s shoulders, grabbed his hat, and then slowly walked with her to the porch where she retrieved her purse.

  “Let me see,” he whispered.

  She opened the cloth bag and he gasped. It was half full all right, but they were all glow-in-the dark condoms and even through the wrapper, they lit up the whole inside of her purse in neon green, yellow, pink, and blue.

  “What’s wrong? Does the big sexy cowboy not like pink?” she asked with a slight giggle.

  “Hell no, I’ve just never been real partial to yellow,” he answered.

  Chapter Seventeen

  Only sixteen more shopping days until Christmas,” the DJ on the store radio said. “For all you folks on the road trying to get some shopping done this morning in central Texas, drive safe and keep your radio tuned to…”

  Fiona blocked out the DJ’s voice and tried to decide if she liked blue or green better, or if one color made hotter sex than the other, when Sharlene came out of the women’s bathroom at the convenience store and threw her hands up in anger. “Are you aware that the condom machine in there is empty?”

  “Try the men’s bathroom,” Fiona said without taking her eyes off the coffee stains she was washing from the table.

  “I did and it’s empty, too.”

  “Must be this weather. Folks got to stay warm somehow,” Fiona laughed.

  Maybe she should ask the man who filled the dispensers once a week if he had some in Christmas red and green.

  “Well, dammit!” Sharlene huffed. “I’m out and my boyfriend is planning to be here tonight and tomorrow. I’ve closed down the day care until Monday with this weather and that leaves us lots of time to play around in the bedroom. Don’t suppose you’d share any of your personal stock, would you?”

  “Why would I have any? I don’t have a boyfriend.” Fiona skirted the issue. “And why doesn’t he buy them?”

  “He usually does, but I’ve always kept a backup stock on hand. Oh! Oh! I forgot about Nadine’s. There’ll be some in the machines in her bathroom and I have a key.” Sharlene wiped her brow in a dramatic gesture.

  “Well, aren’t you lucky?” Fiona said at the same minute the bell above the door let her know someone was entering the store. She glanced over her shoulder and caught Jud’s gaze and wicked little crooked grin. The blush started at the base of her neck and rapidly traveled to her cheeks.

  “You are flushed,” Sharlene said. “That heater vent right above you has made you too hot or maybe”—she lowered her voice—“it’s the customer. You want me to buy a few extra things from Nadine’s bathroom so you’ll be prepared?”

  “No, thanks,” Fiona whispered.

  “Hey, Jud Dawson, what are you doing in town?” Sharlene asked.

  “On my way to Lizzy’s for a pickup load of feed and thought I’d take her a cup of hot chocolate,” he said smoothly.

  “I’m amazed that she’s keeping the store open in this weather,” Sharlene said as she dropped her hand and reached for the doorknob. “Does she have a machine in her bathroom, Fiona?”

  “Of course. The deliveryman has to have at least two stops to even drive all the way up to Dry Creek. You should put one in the bathroom at the day care,” Fiona said.

  “I’m sure that would go over real well with preschoolers.” Sharlene left the store and hurried on down the street to Nadine’s café.

  “I don’t think she’s talking about a candy dispenser, is she?” Jud continued to grin.

  “I think you know what kind of machine she needs.” Fiona started toward the front of the store and he opened his arms.

  She walked into them and inhaled slowly, taking in the remnants of that morning’s shaving lotion on his face, the cold air still lingering on his coat and the smell of coffee on his breath.

  “Last night was amazing,” he whispered.

  “I think we need some red and green for Christmas day. I could wrap them and put them under the tree,” she teased.

  “When I open them, will you blush?”

  “Probably but then so would you.” Fi
ona took two steps back when a truck pulled up to the gas pumps. In a minute, she was at her place behind the counter and Jud was heading back to the coffee machines. He pumped out two cups of hot chocolate and took them to the counter.

  He was putting the change from a five-dollar bill into his pocket when Deke pushed his way into the store.

  “Man, this warm feels good. I’m never complaining about the heat of summer again. This chills a grown man to the bone. At least in the summer, we just sweat a lot and drink more beer. I want a big cup of hot chocolate,” he said. “And I need to make a run through the bathroom.”

  “Machine is sold out. Sharlene tried both bathrooms and said there’s none left,” Fiona said.

  “Looks like folks are finding one way to stay warm,” Deke chuckled. “I’ll just have to leave early tomorrow night and drive into Wichita Falls to a drugstore and stock up. Y’all want me to get you a box while I’m there?”

  One of Jud’s sexy eyelids slid shut in a sly wink. Fiona could feel the high color in her cheeks but there wasn’t a thing she could do about it.

  “I cannot believe we are discussing condoms like we would doughnuts and coffee. And the answer is no. I do not need a box.” She hoped that her comment would justify the crimson in her face. She hadn’t blushed in years, so it had to be living in Dry Creek that brought it on so often.

  “You should stock some on the shelves. I bet you’d make a lot of money.” He pulled out a couple of dollars and handed them to her to pay for the hot chocolate that he’d drawn up.

  “And get sued for causing the old ladies in town to drop dead with heart attacks in my store,” Fiona said. “It’s a wonder any of them even use the bathrooms.”

  “Maybe they don’t know what those machines are dispensing,” Jud said.

  Deke chuckled. “Don’t fool yourselves. I bet they’re the ones guilty for the machines being empty. Can’t you just see Truman wearing one of those new glow-in-the dark—”

  Fiona leaned all the way across the counter and put her hand on Deke’s mouth. “Enough! It’ll take all day to get that image out of my head.” She shivered.