Convenient Proposal to the Lady

by Julia Justiss

  ‘I’d give you the pistol,’ Ben said, attempting to lighten her mood. ‘I admit, I’m...not very happy to be entangled. But it’s foolish to imagine I can simply step aside now. It was one thing for Lord Denbry to ruin you and disappear, with no proof of his involvement. Or for Mr Rossiter to be found with you, when marrying you was what he wanted anyway. But now my name is the one your family will identify as your seducer and, if we don’t marry, it is my name and reputation that will suffer almost as much as yours.’

  ‘You would marry a woman you don’t want, to salvage your reputation?’

  ‘I would marry a woman of character, intelligence and charm, with whom I expect I could live with quite happily for the rest of our lives, to save her reputation and my own,’ he replied, choosing his words carefully.

  ‘One you could live with “quite happily”,’ she repeated. ‘And what happens when you encounter a woman whom you desire with every fibre of your being, whose very presence fills you with joy and without whom you know your life would be blighted for ever?’

  Before he could reply, she shook her head. ‘No! I cannot let you do it. I have known a man who made me feel complete, whose presence and understanding and tenderness filled me with joy. You deserve to experience that, too. I won’t let society’s expectations, or your own sense of honour, rob you of it.’

  ‘Not everyone experiences a love like that,’ Ben countered. ‘I’m nearly one-and-thirty; if I were going to encounter such a thing, I probably already would have. Perhaps I’m not capable of it.’

  Nor did he truly want to experience a love that robbed one of reason and could plunge one into despair. A marriage of convenience would spare him that, he suddenly realised.

  ‘A man as honourable, compassionate, and understanding as you?’ she said. ‘No, we shall not marry. In the eyes of my family, I shall be ruined, just as I want to be. Some whisper of the scandal will likely leak out, troublesome perhaps for a while, but it will fade. In the interim, you can return to the life you’ve planned, free to pursue your dreams, as I will be free to pursue mine.’

  So she was still counting on the scandal to help her achieve her aims. Knowing the way autocratic men acted, Ben was much less sure disgrace would gain her what she sought. ‘Are you so certain being ruined will induce your father to release your trust? He’s sure to be outraged by your refusal to wed and could well conclude that obstinacy shows you possess so little sense that you haven’t the wit to manage your own funds.’

  She flinched at that assessment. ‘He already thinks I haven’t any sense, else I would have accepted one of the respectable offers I received during my Seasons. I’m betting that his desire to rid himself of a daughter he’s never liked, who has involved the family name in scandal, will outweigh his desire to control my funds and my life. But let’s say it does not. Even if I don’t gain the means to control my future, you, who are entirely blameless, should be free to pursue yours. I was the one obsessed with foiling Denbry’s aims; it should not be you who pays for it.’

  ‘Now who’s being noble?’ He gave her a wry smile. ‘You insisted on following your plan, but I insisted on remaining in Dornton Village, against your advice. I was fully aware of the risks. And I’m fully prepared to face the consequences and do my duty.’

  She flinched. ‘What makes you think I want to marry a man who considers me a “duty”? When once I had a suitor who considered me his “beloved”?’

  He was struck by the hurt she tried to mask. Had she felt all her life that her family regarded her as a burden, to be handed off to another man as soon as possible? ‘Duty can also be pleasure, Lady Alyssa,’ he said quietly. ‘I find you lovely, intelligent, principled, courageous and very talented. Many couples have built strong marriages on far less. I shall do everything I can to make you happy. That, I promise you.’

  She turned away from him, swiping at eyes now sheened with tears. ‘My dear Mr Tawny,’ she said, a tremble in her voice. ‘Honourable to the very end. Don’t worry, I shall take care of this for us both.’

  She held out her hand. ‘I’ll say goodbye now, with my most sincere apologies. You wanted nothing but my good; I’m sorry to have repaid your noble intentions with a tawdry scandal. As I don’t expect to see you again, I hope you soon get your Reform Bill passed and wish you a glorious future in Parliament.’

  Ignoring her hand, Ben said, ‘Not see me again? What do you mean?’

  ‘I shall stay in my room, refusing to see you. I’ll inform my mother I will not consider your suit and want to return home at once. I couldn’t live with myself if I took advantage of your honour and compassion to ruin your life because of my own stubbornness.’

  And then, instead of seizing his hand to shake, she reached up and pulled his mouth down to hers.

  Her kiss was wild, fierce, angry, a testament to the passion he’d sensed in her. Swept beyond thought, he responded with an answering hunger, plundering her mouth as she opened to him, seeking out her tongue and tangling his with it, while she murmured low in her throat and urged him closer.

  Ah, how he loved the softness of her bosom against his chest, the delightful roundness of her bottom. Need—sharp, deep, compelling—sang in his blood as he deepened the kiss, desire rippling across his skin, travelling to every part of his awakening body.

  She kissed him with just as much fervour, her hands sliding down his back to caress his buttocks and pull his burgeoning erection closer. Not until his hands went of their own volition to tug at the tapes of her gown, did she push him away and break the kiss.

  For a moment, they simply stood, their panting breaths loud in the silence of the salon. Her face was flushed, her breathing rapid, her eyes dilated with desire, while her kiss-reddened lips begged him to pull her back into his arms and begin again.

  But before he could move, or retrieve his absent wits to point out what a good omen mutual desire was for happiness in marriage, Lady Alyssa stepped back.

  ‘Goodbye, Mr Tawny,’ she said breathlessly. Then whirled around and hurried out the door.

  Chapter Six

  In the committee room three weeks later, Ben surfaced from his abstraction to find Christopher Lattimar waving a paper in front of his face. ‘Penny for your thoughts? Or perhaps I ought to make it a crown, since you’ve been so distracted.’ Putting down the document, Christopher said, ‘Giles and Davie won’t be back for another week. We have plenty of time to review these proposals. Since I can’t get you to pay attention anyway, why don’t we repair to the Quill and Gavel for a few rounds?’

  Inwardly revolted at the idea of visiting the place, he said, ‘You’re right; I can’t concentrate. But I’d rather we go back to the town house.’

  Christopher shook his head. ‘You haven’t wanted to visit the tavern once, this whole week. What is going on?’

  Maybe he should confide in his friend. As of yet, he’d heard nothing further from Lady Alyssa or her family. No rumours of her ruination at a country house party had filtered back to London, as far as he knew.

  But he didn’t mix much in society; Christopher, who was much better socially connected, would be more likely to hear all the latest on dits.

  Perhaps he should disclose what happened to Christopher. His friend could alert him at the first whisper of scandal, so he could take the appropriate action.

  Because he was still not convinced that yielding to Lady Alyssa’s refusal to marry had been the best course of action.

  What was he to say to Lord Fulton, should he ever encounter that gentleman? Or to Lady Alyssa’s sire, in the unlikely event they met?

  Regardless of Lady Alyssa’s refusal to marry him, in the eyes of several society members, he was still considered an amoral seducer. For a man who prided himself on his honourable dealings with ladies, for whom the imperative to protect women had been burned into his soul since childhood, it was a slu
r that continued to burn, like salt rubbed into a wound.

  ‘Ben?’ Christopher said, snapping his fingers in front of his nose. ‘You’re beginning to worry me.’

  His friend’s handsome brow was furrowed with concern. Making up his mind on the instant, Ben said, ‘Very well, I’ll tell you. But over ale at Queen Street. You’ll soon understand why I no longer favour the Quill and Gavel.’

  The two friends summoned a hackney to carry them into Mayfair, where Ben’s father had insisted on loaning him the use of a town house.

  * * *

  Once ensconced in the library, glasses of port in hand, Ben said, ‘This is long, complicated and almost unbelievable, so please hold any comments until I reach the end.’

  He proceeded to fill his friend in on the convoluted train of events, from the ill-fated evening at the Quill and Gavel to his eventual return, alone, from Dornton Manor.

  ‘Damnation!’ Christopher exploded when at last Ben had finished. ‘I knew I should have insisted you come with me to Wiltshire. You would never have been drawn into this business!’

  ‘Despite how it all worked out, I can’t truly be sorry I was drawn into it. If I’d not gone to warn Lady Alyssa, Denbry or Rossiter might have been able to make off with her. Not that, after discovering what an intelligent, discerning woman she is, I think either would have managed to seduce her. But if Rossiter were intent on forcing her into marriage to obtain her dowry, she wouldn’t have been able to resist him. And once he’d...deflowered her, she might have reconsidered her refusal to marry him.’

  ‘You’re still uneasy about the rumours getting out, destroying her reputation and tarnishing yours.’

  ‘Yes. Although I don’t see what else I could have done to prevent that. Lady Alyssa kept her pledge not to see me again. I hung about Dornton Manor for several days, sending her notes pleading that she reconsider, to no avail. I’m sure her mother and Lady Fulton harangued her endlessly, but she was adamant. Finally, Lady Aldermont told me I might as well return to London, as it was clear her daughter would not relent.’

  ‘So at this point only the Fultons and her mother know what happened?’

  ‘And Denbry, Rossiter and Quinlen. Although I warned Denbry if any word of it got out, I’d know who to blame and he’d never use his hands again. In any event, embroiling me in this, after I’d tried to ruin his scheme, is probably revenge enough for him, whether I end up married or not.’

  Christopher bent a penetrating gaze on him. ‘Do you want to be married?’

  Avoiding a direct answer, Ben said, ‘I can’t shake the uneasy feeling that, at some point, the scandal is going to rise up to damage me. Cutting a swathe through the demi-monde is one thing; it’s almost expected. But compromising a woman of good birth, and then not marrying her, would earn me condemnation from more than just society, it would damn me in the eyes of the honest folk of my district. How could I claim to want justice and fairness for all, then ruin an innocent, without appearing to be, at best, a hypocrite? Even if only the Fultons and her parents ever learn of it, they still believe Lady Alyssa was compromised. By failing to marry her, I’ve proved myself less than a gentleman.’ He paused. ‘What would my mother say?’

  Christopher clapped him on the back, no words necessary to convey his understanding. ‘And the lady couldn’t be convinced that marriage was a better option than having her family disdain her?’

  ‘Sadly, she’s used to their disdain—which is such a pity! If I weren’t already conflicted enough, she insisted her sense of honour won’t allow me to sacrifice myself, when my intention was only to save hers. How can one argue with a sense of honour?’

  ‘She sounds very unusual. I can’t think of another single female who would choose ruin over the regrettable necessity of marriage. Especially not to a handsome, charming fellow like you who knows so well how to delight the ladies. Maybe you should have tried to make love to her.’

  Ben had no intention of confessing to Christopher just how close to that he’d come. Nor did he intend to admit that, deep down, he couldn’t shake the insidious suspicion that though her family was willing to take him, Lady Alyssa couldn’t bring herself to marry a bastard son.

  Shaking off those thoughts, he continued, ‘She has some bird-witted notion that being ruined will make it more likely she can persuade her father to release the money left her by her great-aunt, so she can set up her own household. If only I had more confidence that she could persuade him! I wouldn’t mind so much having a slur against my character, if Lady Alyssa were to end up getting what she truly wanted.’

  Christopher looked at him with surprise. ‘She wants to live all alone? Whatever for? Is she...malformed?’

  Picturing Lady Alyssa’s lush, petite figure and mesmerising eyes, Ben laughed. ‘Far from it! She’s not the classic blue-eyed, golden-haired English beauty, but she has a lovely form, handsome, expressive eyes, a keen intelligence and a great deal of courage and fortitude.’

  ‘Then why does she want to live like a hermit?’

  In a few more words, Ben described the lady’s exceptional talent and even more exceptional goals. ‘I’ve seen her sketches and they are superior. I think it’s quite likely a publisher would want to bring out her remarkable work.’

  Christopher studied him. ‘You’re not entirely indifferent to the lady, are you?’

  ‘I’m not,’ Ben admitted. ‘If...all this had not happened, I would have considered seeking her out later, to see what might develop.’ To see if she’d send the bastard packing for my effrontery in wanting more.

  ‘So, what do you intend to do now? Repair to her family home, woo her and persuade her marry you?’

  Ben smiled wryly. ‘I have been considering that very thing. But she’s too intelligent for me to be able to bamboozle her with sudden vows of everlasting love. I am at a stand, not sure what I ought to do next. Not just to squash any rumours before they surface to tarnish my reputation, but to make sure the rest of her life doesn’t become a misery, if her father refuses to let go of her funds. She didn’t ask me to involve myself in her life; I chose to do that and feel...responsible, now, for her well-being. But on the other hand, if I travel to Aldermont Hall, she might refuse to see me.’

  Christopher shrugged. ‘At least then you’ll know you’ve done everything you could to make the situation right.’

  Ben took a deep swallow of ale. ‘We should have a few more weeks before we’ll need to start preparing in earnest for the next session. Enough time to travel to Lincolnshire and back.’

  ‘Returning, perhaps, with a bride?’

  ‘Would you wish me well?’

  Christopher regarded him steadily. ‘You said she described you as honourable, compassionate and understanding. All of which you are. You’ve described her as intelligent, honourable, independent, courageous and lovely. Seems to me that two individuals who begin with that much mutual admiration have as good a chance of making a successful marriage as those who go into it in the throes of ecstatic passion.’ He chuckled. ‘Perhaps more. Ecstasy isn’t sustainable. So, would I give you my blessing for wedding a lady more or less forced on you by circumstance, when wedding her would uphold your honour and fulfil your responsibility? A lady you admire and would have sought out anyway? Of course! Though that means I’m probably going to lose my carousing partner, if she accepts you.’

  ‘Openly carousing would certainly be bad form,’ Ben agreed. ‘As for something more discreet—I’ll have time to consider that later. First, I need to finalise the situation with Lady Alyssa.’

  The vague outlines of a plan he’d been harbouring ever since he rode away from Dornton Manor began crystallising. Glad now that he’d confided in his friend, he said, ‘Thank you for letting me talk things through. I’ve a much clearer idea now of how to proceed.’

  ‘Following the dictates of honour and conscience can n
ever be wrong.’

  ‘Even when it gets you into trouble?’ Ben replied with a laugh.

  Before Christopher could answer, a knock at the door was followed by the entrance of Russell. ‘A letter for you, Captain,’ he said, holding out the folded note. ‘Came by express messenger.’

  While Christopher looked on curiously, Ben broke the seal and swiftly read through the missive. A rueful grin on his face, he turned to his friend.

  ‘It seems Lady Alyssa has been having second thoughts herself. Apparently she’s changed her mind and begs me to visit her at Aldermont at my earliest convenience.’ Apparently she’d decided a bastard son was good enough after all.

  ‘That seals it,’ Christopher said. ‘To get back before the next session, you’ll want to leave immediately.’ Raising his mug, he said, ‘To a successful marriage.’

  After they drained the rest of their ale, Christopher said, ‘Relieved, or regretful?’

  ‘Some of both, I suppose,’ Ben admitted. ‘But there’s also...anticipation. Lady Alyssa is so unique, life with her will always be full of surprises.’

  And pleasure, he thought, recalling her scorching goodbye kiss. That they would prove well matched in the physical side of marriage he had no doubt whatsoever. His body was already stirring in anticipation of showing her all the ways to pleasure.

  ‘Call on me—any of us—if you need anything,’ Christopher said, standing to shake his hand. ‘Know you carry my best wishes with you.’

  ‘See you in a week,’ Ben said as his friend walked out.

  He’d return in a week, soon to become a married man. The notion seemed so foreign, Ben couldn’t get his head around it. But honour required marriage, if Lady Alyssa could be persuaded to it. He might not be able to vow everlasting love, but he could pledge a good-faith effort to make her happy.

  And he’d be able to look his mother in the eye without flinching.

  For the first time since leaving Dornton Manor, he felt...at peace. And resigned to what he was about to do.