Perfection Is Just an Illusion (Swimming Upstream #1)
Page 24
Kate and Kelley looked to their mother for some kind of explanation but Kathryn had nothing. All she could offer her confused daughters was a half-hearted shrug.
“Yay!” Kelley mimicked, elbowing Kate in the side.
“Yeah! Awesome!” Kate agreed her heart not really in it. But Anna didn’t notice. She was too busy staring at James, a wide, happy smile covering her battered face. And in that moment, James knew that she had never looked more beautiful.
An hour later James managed to drag Anna away from the clutches of the other women in the house who had immersed themselves in finalising trivial wedding details.
“You hanging in there?” he asked as he led her by the hand out the back door and towards the pool.
“Yeah, it’s just weird, I guess,” Anna admitted, shrugging a reluctant shoulder. James just squeezed her hand and waited patiently for her to continue. “I mean, I love my family. And yours. But…but…”
“It’s okay, you can say anything to me, you know that.” He smiled.
“I just feel like they’re all watching me. Every time I move, their eyes seem to follow me. It’s like they are waiting for me to break down or crack up. It’s unnerving.” Anna felt guilty as soon as the words tumbled from her mouth. “And don’t try and tell me that they aren’t,” she warned.
“They’re not.”
“I can prove it,” Anna announced with certainty.
“How?” James asked as he sat down on the side of the pool and dangled his feet in the cool water before tugging Anna down beside him.
“On the count of three turn around and look at the kitchen window. I guarantee that there will be at least three sets of eyes watching our every move.”
Reluctantly James nodded his agreement. “One…two…three,” and then on queue they both turned around. James gulped loudly. Standing in the kitchen window, watching their every movement stood Brandon, Lachlan, Michael, and Diana. James shook his head with disappointment as he locked eyes with his father. There was no avoiding the truth when it was standing there, burning a hole in the back of Anna’s skull.
“Told you so,” Anna smirked, kicking up water, splattering James.
He didn’t know what to do. He had no idea how Anna would react to anything that he said in that moment. She was more delicate now than ever and James was determined to not be the one person that pushed her over the edge.
But he knew he had to say something. “We could always give them something to look at.” He winked, making Anna’s heart flutter wildly.
“Have anything specific in mind?” Anna taunted as she watched James’s face register her words.
After a long moment of silence staring at his feet through the water, James asked nervously, “Seriously though, what do you want me to do? They’re just worried about you, that’s all.”
Anna just shrugged. The truth was she understood why they were watching her. And if she was in their position she would do the exact same thing. But right now it was making things harder. She just wanted to pretend it hadn’t happened. That might not be considered the healthy option or even the right choice, but for her it was. It was all she could handle in this moment. And having her family constantly circling was definitely not helping her avoid reality.
“What if I got you out of here for a couple of days? Just you and me.”
“What about training? We can’t just leave,” Anna sighed as disappointment consumed her.
James just laughed and hugged her tight to him. “Six weeks off, remember?”
“Oh, yeah. No training or media for six weeks. Or should I call it bliss?”
***
James
It was something that James had insisted on when he had first joined the senior squad. Immediately after a major competition, no matter the result he would walk away from the pool for a couple of weeks. No media. No training. No strict diet. In his mind this was the only way he could go back. Without the break to be a normal guy, James knew he wouldn’t last long, no matter how impressive his results were.
And right now he had never been more thankful for that decision. Now he had six whole weeks out of the water. He had time he could spend with Anna. And after everything that had happened, it couldn’t have come at a better time. James needed it more than he cared to admit. He needed the time to just relax; time to just be there for Anna when she needed him. She might have been playing it tough right now, but James wasn’t about to allow the delusions to lead him to believe that she’d stay that way. He’d use the time to find them a home. Take Anna on a proper honeymoon.
“Then hell yeah! When do we leave?” Anna’s smile lit up her whole face.
Chuckling to himself, impressed with his own genius, James jumped to his feet. “Give me ten minutes to make some calls and I’ll let you know. But you know the hard part?”
“What’s that?”
“Someone has to tell the vultures.” He smiled his panty dropping smile, turning back to the kitchen and waving animatedly to their audience, sending Anna into an uncontrollable fit of giggles.
Laughing, Anna yelled, “Bags not!”
“Cheat!”
“Nah uh! Besides, I have an ouchie.” Anna grinned, pointing to the cut on her cheek.
“Fine!” James grumbled. “But that excuse has been used now. Hope it was worth it!”
“Oh, it was.” Anna smiled, melting his heart. The truth was in that moment all she had to do was ask and he would have given her anything. And James didn’t care how pathetic and pussy whipped that made him.
Walking back towards the house hand in hand, Anna felt like herself for the first time. Maybe it was because she wasn’t actually thinking. Her entire focus was on the future and the man at her side. She had neither the time nor the energy to dwell on the past.
“Oh Anna, good timing!” Renee exclaimed as Anna stepped through the door.
Without time to react or object, Renee grabbed Anna’s hand and led her back to the table where Kate and Kelley sat poised with magazines in hand. As soon as Anna’s fingers lost contract with James she felt the loss deep in the pit of her stomach and the nerves came back with abundance.
“So Anna, where are we doing the photos?” Kelley asked.
“What photos?” Anna asked, mystified.
“Your wedding photos? Where are you planning on doing them? Not some place lame, I hope,” Kate added.
“I hadn’t really thought about it. Wherever. I don’t mind,” Anna conceded.
“You’re hopeless,” Kate snapped, her snarky attitude creeping through.
“Kate!” Kathryn scolded as she joined the others at the table, a fresh cup of coffee in hand.
“And not to dampen the mood but you remember that these will also be James’s wedding photos?” Diana added.
“What’s that supposed to mean?” Kathryn retorted defensively.
“Nothing like that. I just mean that magazines are going to want James’s wedding photos. So there are going to be offers to sell them,” Diana explained.
Anna sighed heavily. Couldn’t she just have something normal for once? “You’re sure?” Kathryn asked, sensing her daughter’s defences go up.
“Sorry to say but, yeah. On this one I think I’m right. I mean hey, they wanted his eighteenth birthday party photos; but his wedding a week after his haul in Manchester–they’d pay the big bucks for them.”
“Do they have to sell them?”
“No, not at all. But keep in mind somehow they will get photos anyway, whether they take them and pay for them or not.”
“Anna? What do you think?” Kathryn offered, watching as she picked at her nails absentmindedly.
“I don’t know. I hadn’t really thought about it,” she admitted sheepishly. Gone was the girl who barely minutes ago was laughing and full of life as she played in the water with her husband and in her place was a nervous, twitchy replica. “But if they’re going to take them anyway, we might as well control what shots they get.”
“Anna
!” Kathryn exclaimed. “You don’t marry someone to get your photo on the front of a magazine!”
“I don’t think Anna is—” Diana began but was cut off before she had a chance to make her point.
“Let me finish!” Anna said, raising her voice, causing everyone to look at her with their mouths gaping open in stunned silence. “They’re going to take them anyway. At least this way we can decide which bits of our—” she emphasised the word to ram home her point “—day they see and what is kept private. So we might as well take the money. But if it’s okay with James, I don’t want the money.”
“If what’s okay with James?” he asked as he sauntered back into the room, a mischievous glint in his eyes.
“Anna wants to sell your wedding photos,” Renee caught him up bluntly.
James shot Anna a stunned look. Of all the things that they could have been discussing this hadn’t even registered in James’s psyche. “But if they would let me finish, yes, I think we should sell our wedding photos. But I don’t want the money. If it’s okay with you I would rather donate whatever we get for them,” Anna finished.
If they weren’t all stunned into silence before they were now.
“What charity were you thinking?” James asked, stepping behind her and resting his huge hands on her shoulders supportively.
“Lifeline. But it can be anyone. I just think they need the money more than we do.”
“I’ll call Tim and get it done,” James stated, not missing a beat.
“Thank you.” She smiled up at him.
“I love you. You’re perfect, you know,” James gushed, dropping kisses on Anna’s forehead as he pulled his mobile from his pocket and began scrolling through the contacts looking for Tim’s number.
“No, James, I’m not.” Anna smiled sadly. “Perfection is just an illusion. I’m nothing special. I’m just me.”
“Well, you’re everything to me, Mrs. Thompson,” he whispered into her ear so no one else heard but wishing he could shout it from the roof tops. He didn’t want to hide their marriage anymore but another couple of days wouldn’t kill him. But they couldn’t pass fast enough either.
“I’m so proud of you two.” Brandon smiled, clapping James on the shoulder.
“Right, enough with the interrogation, the stalking, and the heavy,” Anna announced, pushing back her chair. “I’m going to the gym for a much needed work out. And,” Anna held her hand up to silence the many comments that were about to come flying in her direction. “I don’t want to hear any more about it. There is a boxercise class in half an hour and I plan to be in it!”
“Can I come?” Renee asked nervously. The truth was she loved that class and usually went but she was worried that Anna would only see it as another person trying to control her.
“Only if you agree not to hold back,” Anna conceded happily before bouncing up the stairs to get ready.
“James?” Diana questioned.
“She’s fine, Mum. She just needs to deal with this in her own way and in her own time. We just need to be there to catch her if she falls.”
Although Diana was sceptical she nodded her agreement and started gathering the dishes to clean up.
***
Anna
An hour and a half later Anna emerged from her boxercise class exhausted and sweaty but somehow energised. It was almost as if she had fought the demons out from inside of her. Instead of letting them eat away at her, she punched and kicked them straight out.
Renee and Anna stood in the hallway outside the room waiting for the line at the water station to die off so they could refill their bottles before heading home. Through the glass Anna spotted James just finishing up his own workout. Even though he was officially on holidays, he still worked out a couple of times a week. Otherwise it would just take too much hard work to get back into it. He claimed it was just easier. And really, he liked the feeling and the freedom a good work out gave him.
In front of Renee a guy in extremely short running shorts bent over and gulped down large, loud mouthfuls of water. Anna turned away, embarrassed when she realised she could see most of his straining underwear.
“There you go,” his gravelly voice echoed as he stepped to the side and gave Renee room.
A cold shiver raced through Anna’s voice. She recognised that voice but she couldn’t place it. ‘Maybe I really am going nuts,’ she laughed to herself dismissively.
“Anna?” it vibrated.
Anna’s eyes shot up and locked with his. Trent was standing before her, his hands on his hips. Anger and frustration filled his face and Anna physically recoiled.
“How? What?” he mumbled.
And that was Anna’s undoing. Without a word she slumped to the floor and started shaking mercilessly.
Trent squatted on the floor beside her. “Anna, please. I never meant for things to go that far. I never thought he would hurt you,” Trent added, pausing to really take in the sight before him. Not only was she petrified but the bruises and the cuts were blatant reminders of her ordeal. “I just wanted…I wanted you to feel what it was like to be rejected, like you dismissed me without hesitation. Just because I don’t drive a fancy car, or have money or gold medals doesn’t mean you’re better than me. But you didn’t care. You just rejected me like I was nothing. I just wanted to teach you a lesson. But Grant, he took it too far. I’m really sorry, Anna. I really—” But his pleas weren’t heard as Anna began to scream blue murder.
Trent went to reach out to her but stopped himself. As Renee turned and saw what was unfolding before her she caught James’s eye through the wall and she just nodded quickly as James sprinted to the door as quick as he could, leaping over empty equipment in his way.
Trent took a step backwards as Renee sunk to her knees beside her. “Anna…Anna, talk to me,” she begged, placing her fingers under Anna’s chin and forcing her to look her in the eye. “What is it?”
“It was him,” Anna mumbled no louder than a murmur.
“What was him?” Renee probed as she spied James enter the room.
“With Grant,” Anna whimpered, collapsing against Renee. “What?” James boomed, glaring at Trent, who was cowering in the corner.
“James!” Renee warned but James didn’t hear her. Instead he just stepped over the pile of women on the floor and in one swift fluid movement he released a punch with all that he was. It took less than a second for Trent to hit the ground.
“Renee!” James stated as he dropped his phone into her lap. “I’m taking Anna away from here. Call the cops and let them know we found the bastard.”
THE END
ACKNOWLEDGEMENTS
First, I can almost guarantee this wouldn’t have happened without my grandfather, Sam. He was the first person who believed I could do this and even though he’s not here today to see my journey take the next step, I have no doubt he would be proud.
For those people who first started reading drafts of frankly terrible short stories too many years ago, thank you. Karenya, you were always first to get a copy and were the first person to explode with excitement when my dreams came true. Thanks Mum and Dad for everything. Using your skills honed in the classroom over many years, your editing and proofreading helped more than you will ever know. Not to mention without your unashamedly blatant promotion and encouragement I wouldn’t have got to where I am today.
To Sue Britton, Barb Steadman, Allison Burman, Kymberlee Ellson…what can I say? Over the years you have read bad drafts, offered opinions, encouragement, and constructive criticism. Your time, patience, and belief helped me get there. It might have taken a while, but we did it. Without you on my side this wouldn’t be a reality.
To the team at Limitless Publishing, you are truly amazing. You have by far exceeded all of my expectations with your patience, understanding, and guidance throughout this very new, very scary process. Without you, especially Lori, who has been a godsend, I would have fallen to pieces before this even happened. I cannot thank you enough.
But finally I have to say thanks to my husband Rob, who encouraged me to get back into something I loved after a long hiatus and his own unique brand of ‘encouragement’ has gotten me this far.
Here’s to the first of hopefully many more to come.
Bec
About the Author
Rebecca, one of four kids to her parents who are both primary school teachers, was born in Wollongong on the south coast of Australia before moving to the country with her family. After a few years of embracing all that country life had to offer, the family relocated to Port Macquarie with its white sand beaches. After a brief period enjoying the sun and the surf they finally settled in Canberra where Rebecca still lives today. But all through her childhood a notepad and a book where never far away. These days Rebecca is an avid reader, and when she isn’t buried in a book or cheering on her beloved football team she’s spending time with her husband Robert and their overly spoilt dog Levi.
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