True North

by Robin Huber

  “Fresh out of the dryer.” I smile. “Sorry.”

  “Don’t apologize for wearing tight jeans, baby,” he says, and I giggle. He gazes down at what’s left of my clothing—my bra and matching panties. He reaches over his head and pulls his shirt off, and he’s all long lean muscles and golden skin, tanned from the summer sun. He crawls over me, still wearing his jeans, and positions his elbows beside my shoulders, leaning up to hold his weight off me. He drops his head and rubs his nose against mine. “Are you sure you’re ready to do this?”

  “I’ve never been so sure about anything.”

  He smiles and kisses me hard, pushing his tongue into my mouth, and mine tangles with his. We mastered kissing long ago. Slow, deep kisses fill me with hot, flowing honey that slowly travels down to my core. I press my hips up against his instinctively, needing to feel his hardness between my legs to relieve the ache there. Gabe takes my cue and slides his hand between us, slowly inching his way down my stomach until his long fingers are inside my panties, gliding between my legs. He pushes his finger inside me and I moan into his mouth, rocking my hips against his hand. He makes a deep, throaty groan and kisses me harder, pushing into me deeper, and then he rubs the slickness up over the sensitive spot between my legs, circling it again and again. I stop kissing him and drop my head against the blanket, arching my back as I quietly cry, “Gabe.”

  He drops his mouth to my neck and trails warm kisses up to my jaw and back down, until I cry out with pleasure and my body shatters into a million pieces beneath him. He brings his mouth back to mine and kisses me slow as my body trembles beneath him.

  “Gabe,” I pant, “I’m ready. I want you...now.”

  He gives me a small, satisfied smile. “Slow, remember?”

  I nod my head reluctantly and try to slow down. As ready as my body is, I know this isn’t something I want to rush.

  He hooks his fingers inside my panties and slides them down my legs, leaving warm, breathy kisses in his wake that do all sorts of delicious things to my insides. I try to lie still and savor the feeling of his lips dragging across my skin. He reaches for my bra and I lean up to give him access to the clasp in the back. He quickly unhooks it—something else he mastered a while ago—and slides it down my arms. I lie back on the blanket, completely naked, gazing up at him, and I feel so safe and at ease lying in the light of the moon beneath him. He leans over me and kisses my breasts, and I let out a soft moan. He kisses my mouth and rubs his hand across my stomach. “You’re so beautiful.”

  I beam up at him, thinking the same thing about him. “Tell me again.”

  “You’re beautiful.”

  “Say it in French.”

  “Tu es la plus belle chose que j’ai jamais vu,” he whispers. “You’re the most beautiful thing I’ve ever seen.”

  I pull his mouth back to mine and kiss him hard.

  He unbuttons his jeans and shrugs out of them, but not before grabbing a condom out of his pocket that I’m pretty sure is a few years old now. I’ve been on birth control for a while to help with my periods, so I don’t worry about its reliability.

  He sheds his boxer-briefs and I feel him spring free against my stomach. This is all new and the feeling of him against me makes my muscles clench low and deep in my tummy.

  I’m ready. I’m so ready.

  He tears the condom open with his teeth and reaches down to put it on. When he pulls his hands to my face again, I can see the question in his eyes.

  “Yes,” I say, giving him the answer he’s asking for. “I’m ready. I want you.”

  He nods softly and his eyes, dark in the light of the moon, gaze into mine as he takes himself in his hand and rubs softly over my entrance. Then he gently pushes into me.

  Slowly.

  Very slowly.

  I groan softly at the strange feeling, hoping he didn’t hear, but he stops moving, so I know that he did. “It’s okay, you didn’t hurt me.”

  “Liv, we don’t have to.”

  “I want to. Just go slow, okay?”

  He presses his lips together and nods, and continues pushing into me ever so slightly, but I suddenly feel tense and rigid.

  Why? I’m ready. My body is definitely ready, or it was two minutes ago. I love him more than anything in the world. I’m ready. I close my eyes and take slow deep breaths, and try to relax.

  Breathe in.

  And out.

  In. And out.

  My muscles begin to relax and my body melts into the blanket under Gabe’s weight. I grip his arms, feeling his muscles flex as he holds himself over me. He’s being so careful.

  Relax, Liv. Just relax, I remind myself.

  The look on Gabe’s face is one of pure ecstasy and awe. It’s too much. I pull his mouth to mine and kiss his full lips. He loses focus and pushes into me the rest of the way, sending a sharp pinch of pain through me that makes me squeak.

  “I’m sorry,” he says, looking apologetic.

  The pain quickly dissipates and I focus on his handsome face, on the weight of his body pressing down on me, on the warmth of his wide thighs against mine, on the way that we’re connected. I smile up at him. “I’m okay. Keep going.”

  He slowly pulls back and I focus on the strange feeling of him moving inside me. He feels huge. I wonder if this is what it feels like for everyone. Just when I begin to feel empty again—a welcome relief—he pushes back into me, filling me up and stretching me further. I make a soft moan that matches his and I realize that it’s because it felt good. He moves out of me again and then back in. Ohh.

  “Are you okay?” he asks, barely audible.

  “Yes.”

  His eyes close and he breathes heavily against my mouth. “You feel so amazing...I.... Oh my God...Liv.... You feel...incredible.”

  I drop my head back against the blanket and pull him down against me, relishing the feeling of his weight on top of me as his tongue caresses mine in sync with this slow movements. I run my fingers down his back and grab his bottom, pulling him against me to let him know that he can go a little faster now, and he does.

  Ohh. Ohhh. Okay, I get it. This is what all the fuss is about. I pull my knees up and hold onto him as he takes me to a new place of pleasure that I’ve never experienced before. I feel the fire building deep in my tummy and crawling up my thighs...slowly...slowly...until my entire body is bursting beneath him. “Gabriel,” I cry, wrapping my legs around him tightly.

  He lets out a husky groan and kisses me passionately, and I shudder beneath him while he thrusts into me two more times, making a deep guttural groan and grinding his hips against me, before he stills.

  I lie beneath him, dizzy with satisfaction, both physically and emotionally. Gabe just made love to me for the first time and it was amazing. I didn’t think it was possible to love him more, but I do. I smile, feeling giddy, but I need to take a breath and Gabe is lying on my chest. “Gabe, you’re crushing me.”

  He raises up on one elbow. “Sorry.” He has a giant smile on his face, the one that shows off his straight white teeth and makes my heart skip around in my chest. “That was amazing.”

  I reach up and rub my thumb over his flushed cheek. “It was pretty incredible.”

  “Did it hurt?” he asks with apologetic eyes.

  “Just a little at first, but as soon as I relaxed it felt good, and then it felt great, and then it felt amazing.” I smile and run my fingers through his hair. “I love you so much.”

  He plants a soft kiss on my forehead. “I love you more.”

  We get dressed, but we opt to skip the rest of the movie. We lie together instead, our fingers interlaced, my head on his chest and his arms wrapped around me, staring up at the starry sky, talking and making plans for the future. After about an hour, we get up and make our way back. The movie should be over soon and Brandon will likely be looking for us.

  * * *

  The credits are rolling when we walk up to the thinning crowd. Those who are left are packing up their coolers and d
ragging them across the sand back to their cars. Brandon is standing in front of Audrey with a smile on his face. He doesn’t look like he’s in a hurry to leave.

  She gives him a quick hug. “Bye, Brandon. I had fun tonight.” She glances up at me with a shy smile, then she gives me a hug and whispers, “Hope it’s not weird for you that I’m talking to Brandon.”

  “Of course not. Keep an eye on him for me this year, okay?”

  She laughs softly and nods. “You got it.”

  “See you at Thanksgiving?”

  “Yep, I’ll be home.”

  “I guess I’ll see you then,” I say with a knowing smile.

  “Hope so.” Audrey laughs. “Bye.” She waves over her shoulder as she goes, leaving Brandon with a big smile on his face.

  “I take it you finally asked her out,” I say to him as soon as Audrey is out of ear shot.

  “Indeed, I did.” He bows proudly.

  “Did you do anything else?” Gabe winks, and I smack his arm. “What?” He laughs. “She’s cute.”

  “She’s gorgeous,” Brandon says with a love-struck smile on his face. “But no, I think there’ll be plenty of time for that. Besides, she’s a nice girl. I don’t want to rush it.”

  “Well, duh! It’s about time you asked her out. She’s had a crush on you since forever.”

  “Yeah, well, good things come to those who wait,” he says, cracking his knuckles out in front of him.

  I roll my eyes and shake my head. “Come on, Romeo, let’s go.”

  Gabe walks next to Brandon and squeezes his shoulder in a guy-like congratulatory way as we make our way to the car.

  We all pile in and Gabe takes my hand as the engine purrs to life. He pulls onto the two lane road that runs parallel to the beach. It hasn’t changed much since I was little. Knotted mangroves and palmetto bushes line either side of it, giving way to beach access in between the sand dunes every couple of miles. The moon is shrouded behind a blanket of clouds now, so I can’t actually see the trees through the dark, except for right at the edge of the road where the headlights are glowing against the ground.

  “Hey, text Mom,” I say to Brandon. “Let her know we’re on our way.”

  “It’s only ten.”

  “I know, but you know how she worries. Just send her a quick text to let her know. My phone is dead.”

  “All right, all right.” He pulls his phone out, but drops it when Gabe stops at a red light. “Ah, shit.”

  “You’re such a klutz,” I tease.

  “Easy on the brakes, man.” He leans forward and reaches under Gabe’s seat, stretching and groaning and cussing as he searches for it. “Dammit,” he grumbles, unbuckling so that he can find it.

  Another car pulls up alongside us and it startles me because that lane is meant for oncoming traffic. “Oh, God, it’s Jeremy.” I recognize his ridiculous souped-up Honda. It looks like he just drove it off the set of The Fast and the Furious.

  He rolls his window down, so Gabe lowers his. “What do you want, Jeremy?”

  He grins and nods in my direction. “Liv knows what I want.”

  “Ew,” I say as Gabe slams the car into park. He reaches for his door handle, but I grab his arm. “Gabe, don’t. He’s an idiot. Just ignore him.”

  He hesitates, but then shuts his door.

  Jeremy grins with satisfaction. “Hey, why don’t we see what that car of yours is made of?”

  I roll my eyes.

  “Come on pretty boy, one quick race. You win, I’ll leave Liv alone. I swear.”

  Gabe grips the steering wheel and revs the engine, and Jeremy bounces in his seat.

  “All right, let’s do this!” Jeremy shouts.

  “You’re not actually considering racing him, are you?”

  Gabe ignores me and revs the engine again.

  “Gabe, come on, you’re better than this.”

  “Kick his sorry ass, Gabe! You got this,” Brandon says excitedly. “His piece of shit car couldn’t keep up with my dad’s old Jetta.”

  “Hey!” I protest.

  “Sorry, Liv, but it’s true.”

  Gabe joins Brandon in a laugh at my car’s expense.

  “Fine, have it your way. Do your little boy race and show Jeremy who’s got the bigger”—Gabe raises an eyebrow at me—“engine.” I narrow my eyes at him.

  “It’s a straight stretch of road, Liv, and there aren’t any cars coming. I just need a few hundred feet to shut him up.” He looks at Jeremy and establishes the finish line. “Next beach access sign.”

  I wave my hand at him and look out my window.

  When the light turns green, Gabe floors it and my head slams back against the seat. I grab the door handle. Holy shit, this car is really fast. Gabe doesn’t normally drive like this. The lines in the middle of the road are flying by and the trees that I could barely see before are now just a dark blur. There aren’t any cars coming, so I feel somewhat okay about not having a head-on collision, but no, no I do not feel okay!

  “Gabe, that’s enough.”

  “Almost there.” His arms are locked straight out in front of him and his hands are gripped firmly around the steering wheel. He has a wild look of male domination in his eyes.

  “Hell yeah,” Brandon shouts from the back seat when Gabe reaches the finish line before Jeremy. “You smoked his ass!”

  “Gabe, slow down!”

  Brandon shouts again, leaning forward to grab Gabe’s shoulders. I look back and see Jeremy’s car slowing behind us. He turns around and heads in the other direction.

  Thank God.

  Gabe and Brandon are celebrating, but I’m just relieved that it’s over. I turn back around in my seat and my heart rate begins to slow to a normal pace again. But it quickly jumps back up when I see a deer leaping out into the road ahead of us. “Gabe! Watch out!”

  * * *

  I hear glass cracking and metal twisting. I see blurs of light and trees and dirt and—Ow! Pain is stabbing me all over my body. I’m being flung around like a rag doll. Terrified, but unable to see or catch my breath long enough to scream out, I squeeze my eyes shut and wait for it to end. When it finally does, an eerie silence settles around me.

  I reach for my chest, struggling to breathe. My seatbelt is crushing me and my head is throbbing. I look up and down, feeling disoriented. I’m hanging upside down by my seatbelt. I can’t see much, just the haze of the headlights shining against a tangled mess of trees that I could reach out and touch. The windshield is gone and a long, leafy branch is in the car. I squeeze my eyes shut again, feeling confused, but after a few seconds my head clears and I remember the race...and the deer.

  “Gabe?” I croak.

  The silence I hear in return sends a sickening rush of heat through me.

  “Brandon?”

  I blink my eyes a few times, but everything is blurry. “Gabe?” I rasp again, my voice trembling and barely audible. I turn my head and the skin on my neck rubs painfully against my constricting seatbelt. I see Gabe hanging by his waist from his seatbelt. The top half of his body is laying limply against the roof of the car, which is now the floor. “Gabe!” I cry, but my voice is just a resounding echo in my head. It’s like I’m screaming under water. “Gabe!” I scream again, ignoring the pressure in my head, but he doesn’t answer.

  I can see blood pooled around him in the glow of the headlights. His face and arms are covered in cuts and his white T-shirt is splotched with red. I cry silently, trying to reach him, but I can’t. “Gabe!” I yell, desperately trying to find my voice. “Gabe!” I scream again, a little louder now. But he doesn’t move.

  Oh, God.

  A spike of adrenaline courses through me and I work frantically to get my seatbelt unbuckled, but it’s locked in place, holding me prisoner. I stretch my left arm out as far as I can, ignoring the burning pain that comes with it, until the tips of my fingers reach him. I grip his shirt and desperately tug at the material. “Gabe! Gabriel! Wake up!” I say insistently, hearing my voice a
little clearer now. “Wake up!” I repeat, trying not to cry as I beg him to come to. I call his name again and again, yanking on his shirt with all my strength, but he just lies there, still and unmoving.

  My hand falls back to me and I begin to cry. “Gabe, please...please wake up. Please.” I cry harder and the only sound I hear is the echoing of my own sobs.

  “Brandon,” I call over my shoulder to the back seat. I can’t turn my head far enough to see him. “Brandon, Gabe needs help.”

  He doesn’t answer me.

  “Brandon?” I stretch my arm out again, ignoring the pain from the seatbelt. I reach for the rearview mirror and tilt it so that I can see the backseat. I search from one side of the mirror to the other, but I don’t see him. “Brandon?”

  The realization that he isn’t in the car and the memory of him taking off his seatbelt to find his phone settles over me like a ton of bricks, suffocating me. I think of him lying on the side of the road, hurt and scared. I have to look for him. I have to find him! I claw at my seatbelt, but it’s a vice grip, holding me to the seat. I’m completely helpless.

  The overwhelming frustration of not being able to help the two men I love most in the world quickly consumes me and I begin to scream.

  I scream and scream and scream, until I can’t scream anymore.

  “Oh my God, oh my God,” someone says from outside of the car.

  “Help,” I rasp. “Help us.”

  “Oh my God, Liv.”

  Jeremy.

  He crouches beside Gabe’s broken window and peers inside the car. “Oh, fuck. Oh, God.”

  “Jeremy, help us.”

  He stands up, I assume to come to my side of the car, but then I hear him throwing up. I cry, feeling as sick as he does. When it’s silent again, I call for him. “Jeremy.”