“Yes. Of course. He went to great lengths to buy the house as soon as it became available. His great-grandfather sold it shortly after the fire that burned down carriage house back at the turn of the century; before your father was ever born. The house needed a lot of updates and his great-grandfather did not have the money to invest in it. The house had no electricity, the plumbing was outdated and having a lot of problems. Many other things that were going to take a lot of time and expense needed fixing. He had the opportunity to sell it for a small fortune; so he jumped at the chance, although it killed him to let it out of the family. Your father, Shane, grew up hearing stories about the house and how grand it was. So when your parents moved to Chicago, he was determined to purchase it and vowed never to let it out of the family again. Monte explained all of this too us. Shane has no idea that we know.”
Robert tried to give me as much information as he knew so I could understand everything.
“But he’s never mentioned any of this to us, I mean my sister or brother.”
“Shane is a very private man. More so than most I would say.” Emily offered. “When we met them for dinner and were discussing the vast history of this area he barely mentioned that the house was your ancestral home. But your mother is aware of it because the news did not surprise her any.” She laughed. “You know one thing your mother did tell me. She said that when they were researching Shane’s family line years ago she came across the fact that Patrick, your other father, had built the house when his wife Annabelle, your other mother, was pregnant with you. Amy discovered that Annabelle had named you Jocelyn Alyssa and she thought it was the most beautiful name. She decided then because they got the house back in the family when she was pregnant with you, that you should also be named Jocelyn Alyssa.”
“What? Are you serious?” Robert and Emily nodded smiling widely. “Are you telling me that I am named after myself?”
“It is a little strange, I admit.” Robert laughed and Jackson and Emily joined in. “A little unusual, perhaps.”
“You think?” This was all too much information to even begin processing. My head was swimming, and I couldn’t piece it together. ”So are you telling me that I could perhaps look myself up on the internet for the 19th century and find out what happens in my life?”
“I would not recommend doing that. People have done that in the past, and it has led to some dire consequences.” Robert gave me the stern father look and the voice to match so I immediately dropped it.
“This is all so unreal. I don’t know what to say. And you have not explained why you came here looking for me. Why now?” The three of them looked at each other and hesitated.
“Remember the vision you said you had tonight,” Emily began. “Jackson’s proposal?”
Instantly, my face turned crimson. I hadn’t as much as kissed this man, and yet I was having visions of it; and somehow, I was engaged to marry him.
“You and Jackson are due to be wed on Christmas.”
“Christmas. This Christmas?”
“Yes.” Jackson gave me the most loving smile that it took my breath away.
“And?”
“Well, the problem with it is that when you both announced your engagement at Easter last spring, Monte came over and explained to us that you also had the gift of EVE. He, of course, was aware that we had the gift also. You see, he stayed in Boston when your family moved to Chicago when Shane got promoted, because Boston is traditionally historic. A lot of us who have inherited this gift feel more comfortable in the New England area. That is why we live there also. But what became clear when he told us about you having this gift also is the problem of your wedding night, to be more precise.”
Robert looked suddenly uncomfortable, and the look on his face told me that he was hoping I could figure out what he was trying to say without him having to spell it out for me.
But I was lost. Sure. Our wedding night. So what? That was clearly between Jackson and me, or at least I thought so. I would imagine that in 1878, I was still a virgin. I had no memories or flashes to contradict that impression. I was certainly still a virgin in 2009, so I didn’t understand the problem.
“Isn’t that between Jackson and me?”
I looked between the three of them. Robert and Jackson clearly looked uncomfortable with having to explain the obvious.
“That is true. However, the ramifications of it could strongly impact your life here, I am afraid,” Emily began. “Jocelyn.” She squeezed my hands gently. I could see she was trying to carefully choose her words to make the explanation as painless as possible for all ears listening.
“Birth control in the 19th century consists mainly of the rhythm method. I am sure you are aware how largely ineffective that is. With you and Jackson both having the gift of EVE, I can guarantee that all of your children will have the gift also. Therefore, if you conceive a child in 19th century, the child will be with you in 21st century. Trust me. I carried all three of my children in two separate time periods, and I was just as pregnant in each of them. It did not matter where I was. We came here looking for you because we are afraid that once you two are married you will become pregnant. That would add the obstacle of explaining it to your family here. The impact of a pregnancy in 2009 would forever alter your life here. Do you understand what I am saying?” Emily looked so motherly and sincere.
“Yes, I believe so. You’re saying that if I become pregnant there after Jackson and I are married then I will also be pregnant here. Correct?”
Emily nodded.
“But how can that be? Robert just said it was my soul that travels not my body. If my body can’t travel and only my soul does, how can a baby travel with me in both periods? That doesn’t make sense.” Now I was really confused.
Emily squeezed my hands in hers, attempting to comfort and reassure me, but I was way beyond comforting.
“I am honestly not sure why it is. I cannot explain it. I am sorry. I truly wish I could. But I know I carried all of my children in both periods and to be honest, it was different to say the least. Therefore, I know you will experience the same because you both have inherited the gene.”
“We came here to trigger the existence of your other life into your reality here. It would be very difficult to explain how a virgin teenager became pregnant. Wouldn’t you agree?” Robert laughed clearly feeling better that he didn’t have to explain the details to me.
“True. I can see where that would cause some problems.” I couldn’t imagine how I would have reacted if halfway through basketball season I discovered I was pregnant. The fact that I am still a virgin would clearly have gotten me admitted to the nuthouse. “So what do we do now?”
“Well, you have two options.” Emily took a deep breath lost in thought.
“Such as?”
Emily looked uncomfortable but continued. “Well, darling, I am sorry to have to ask this, especially in front of the men, but are you by any chance taking birth control pills? I am not saying that you are not a virgin, some women take them to relieve menstrual cramps or just to regulate their cycle.”
“No.” This conversation had taken an embarrassing turn for the worse. This was not information that I shared lightly, with anyone.
“Once that barrier is completely diminished, you will become fully aware of both worlds like we are. At that time the adjustments won’t um, what is the word I am looking for?” Robert looked extremely uncomfortable again.
“Are you saying that if we take precautions here, then I will be able to make love to Jackson here, just not in the 19th century where we are actually married? Am I correct?” I attempted to ease Robert’s pain.
“Well, yes.” Robert looked ready to bolt.
“One slight problem though with that.” I smiled over at Jackson. “I faint and apparently have flashbacks whenever he touches me.”
“Once both sides of your consciousness are joined, eliminating the barrier between your two worlds, the fainting and all other symptoms will disappea
r. I promise.” Emily reassured me.
“But how long will that take?”
“I am not sure, to be honest. Everyone is different.” Emily shrugged. Much to my own dismay, it became clear she had no concrete answers to give me.
My body screamed in protest as I shifted myself around, draping my legs over the front of the couch in the proper position. I looked around for a moment at the three faces starring back at me as I tried to absorb everything I had heard in the last thirty minutes.
“So let me get this clear. I apparently live in my ancestral home, am named after myself and have a genetic defect called EVE that makes it possible for me to live two perfectly normal and complete lives on parallel planes over a hundred and thirty years apart with two separate families. Oh, and I am engaged to Jackson and getting married this Christmas. And these flashes that I experience are really memories of my own from my other life in the 19th century. Plus, as an added bonus, not only am I getting married at eighteen to an eighteen year old; I faint every time he touches me. And once we’re married and want to consummate that marriage, we can only have sex here on a plane where we’re virtually strangers who’ve only known each other for two weeks.” I exhaled deeply at the absurdity of it all. “Is that about right?”
“Pretty much,” Jackson said, “with one exception. I am not eighteen. I will be twenty-two years old on December 6. I lied about my age to go to school with you. I am actually almost done with law school in 1878 and was, up until three weeks ago, in my first semester of law school in Boston. I finished my bachelor’s last spring.”
“Great. Anything else about you a lie?” I was quickly becoming frustrated. “I’m sorry I just didn’t expect to find out any life altering events today. I was just expecting to get dressed up and go to a Halloween Party.” Then it hit me. “My costume isn’t really a costume at all is it? Neither is yours?” I looked directly at Jackson.
“Well, yes and no. I mean, they are costumes for the party tonight, and my mother did sew them from scratch for us; but they are replicas of outfits that we both already own in 1878. I thought that maybe they would trigger something in you if you put on the dress and saw me in the suit.” Jackson looked like a sinner at confession.
“See, we did not know if you were experiencing flashes or not or if my presence had any effect on you besides the symptoms I had witnessed so I was attempting to push the envelope. I am sorry. Truly I am. The costumes were my idea. My parents did not want to try it. They thought the costumes might be too strong a trigger and could produce undesired results. But I pushed the issue since I was unaware of the magnitude of what you were experiencing.” He moved next to me on the couch just inches from me and for the very first time it didn’t have any effect on me physically.
Instead, I felt nothing but an overpowering love for him that was even more confusing to me than the lightheadedness, nausea and cold chills.
“Jocelyn, you have to believe me. I love you more than I can possibly explain to you at this moment. You are my life and I would never ever do anything that I truly believed would cause you physical or emotional pain.” Jackson looked at me with his gorgeous, green eyes, pleading for my understanding.
“I know.” And somehow that I couldn’t even explain even to myself, I knew he did. I felt it. Stranger still, I felt the same way. “And you want to hear something even stranger?”
I smiled at him and then at both his parents, who sat in front of us. Robert still had arm wrapped around his wife.
“I’m not experiencing any symptoms, none at all. What happened?”
The three of them looked as puzzled as I felt.
“Can I try something?”
I smiled at Jackson who nodded in return. I leaned over as if I was going to touch him to test my own reaction, but as if on impulse, I gently pressed my lips upon his.
Jackson responded passionately, pulling me closer to him.
Reluctantly, I pulled myself away, trying to catch my breath. My face immediately turned crimson.
“Well, it is nice to see you have gotten over the nausea and fainting episodes.” Emily smiled.
“Yes,” I blushed further. “But why?”
“Because your mind knows everything we have told you this evening is true,” Robert stated proudly.
I looked over at Jackson, and he nodded in confirmation.
“So, this is real?”
The three of them nodded in unison.
“Can I ask a question then?”
“Of course,” Jackson answered.
“How long have we been together? I mean, as a couple there?”
“Three years.”
“And we’re getting married over Christmas?”
“Yes.”
“Are we very much in love?”
“Very much so.”
“And I have a happy life there?”
“Yes. I mean it is like every life. It has ups and downs, but yes, you are very happy there.”
“I can’t believe this.” I shook my head. How is any of this possible? “I have so many questions I don’t know where to begin.” I laughed.
“That is only natural, Jocelyn dear.” Emily reached over, placing her hand back on mine.
The phone rang out, startling the four of us. With a brief sigh, Emily got up and disappeared into the kitchen to answer it.
“How are you feeling? Does your head hurt?” Jackson touched my cheek lightly and tucked a few stray strands of hair that had fallen out of the curlers behind my ear. Then he wrapped his arm protectively around my waist. It felt so wonderful, so right. Natural. I loved the fact that the symptoms he normally evoked had disappeared.
“The ibuprofen helped a lot. But my body is sore.”
Jackson’s green eyes danced as he whispered in my ear, “It is so wonderful to finally be able to hold you.”
I didn’t have the chance to respond before Emily waltzed back into the front room. “That was Amy. Your parents will be here in about an hour.” She sat down again next to Robert, watching Jackson and me. “So, what are you two going to do?”
“I would still like to go to the party if you feel up for it.” Jackson flashed me that lop-sided grin I loved so much.
“I suppose so.” My voice was still weak.
I really didn’t want to go. How could he think about going to a party tonight of all nights? Not after everything I had just learned.
“Would you rather be here when your parents arrive?” He asked, recognizing the odd look I gave him.
“Dinner? Ah, right. I forgot.” My parents were supposed to be here for dinner tonight. “I guess we’re going to the party, then.” I took a deep breath and signed. “Emily, would you mind fixing my makeup?” I turned back over to Emily, who nodded.
“I will get dinner started, honey.” Robert got up kissing his wife and headed off to the kitchen.
“I am going to take a shower.” Jackson followed his father’s example and kissed me briefly before departing himself.
Emily and I returned to her vanity in attempt to repair the damage my tears had done her masterpiece.
It took her almost thirty minutes to completely redo my makeup and take the curlers out of my hair. She had styled my hair in the appropriate fashion, which actually was beautiful and elegant.
I stood back in her full-length mirror, staring at a version of my other self, completely in awe. I barely recognized myself. The clothes felt so foreign to my skin. I tried to imagine myself wearing these every day of my life, but the thought even seemed absurd.
I spun around and faced Emily, who held this mischievous grin across her face.
“You look so lovely. If I did not know better I would swear I was standing in front of, the other you.” She laughed.
“This feels so strange.” I did a full spin and stared at myself again in the mirror. She came up behind me, still smiling; “Do I really dress like this, in all these layers?” I ruffled the skirt a bit. The gown felt awfully heavy. I couldn’t fathom wearing a
ll these layers in the humid summer heat.
“Yes, every day.” She placed her hands on my shoulders. “Do not look so glum. I wear them also.”
“But it’s so heavy. What about the summers? And no air conditioning? It must be miserable!” I exclaimed.
“Yes, the summers can be. But when it is something that you are accustomed to, you honestly think nothing of it.”
I turned back to face her. “I have so many questions I want to ask you.” My eyes pleaded with her for answers.
“We have plenty of time. Do not worry about it right now.”
How could she possibly be serious? Not worry? I could think of nothing else.
Jackson came up behind us, also dressed in his full Victorian attire. The sight of him literally took my breath away.
“Wow. Jocelyn, you know you look amazing. You look exactly like, well, you.” He laughed. “It is uncanny.”
“I know. That is what I said,” Emily agreed, turning towards him. “I am going to help your father with dinner. You two better hurry and get out of here. Stop in the kitchen before you leave. I know your father wants to see you both and take some pictures.” Jackson nodded, and she left us alone.
“You ready?” He held out his hand to me.
I took his hand in mine. It was so strange and wonderful to be able to touch him without the bizarre reactions. I loved the feel of his skin — warm and smooth. His hand molded into mine with a firm grip.
I took a deep breath and looked lovingly at the man who, in another life somehow, I was going to be married to in a few short weeks.
“I’m nervous.”
“Why?” he gave me a puzzled expression.
“This is just too much to process,” I exclaimed turning back toward my reflection in the mirror. I stared for a long moment at the vision of this other me who lived in an era that I could not begin to understand. She resembled me, obviously. But she was somehow not me. “I feel like I don’t know who I’m supposed to be.”
Jackson wrapped his arms around my waist. “You are my Jocelyn. And regardless of where we happen to be, nothing can change that fact.” He leaned down and rested his head on top of mine. His eyes held mine intently in the reflection of the mirror. “I truly love you, Jocelyn. I realize that your consciousness here has only known me a couple of weeks and hearing me say that seems overwhelming, but I promise you that we are very much in love.”
Essence Page 28
